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Maya2001 -> RE: A survivor's story (long post) (12/12/2007 3:21:33 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: domiguy
quote:
BloodLuna
Why am I coming out with this on the boards after 7 years? Because I want to make it clear to those with any doubts that there is a difference between Consensual and Abusive. Because I want to make it clear that any person can say they are anything or anyone online, or in the beginning of a relationship.
This is definitely part of the lesson.....But folks, in reality isn't this the part of the message that should equally be gleaned?
quote:
BloodLuna
Warning bells should have gone off for me immediately. I'd been in the lifestyle 5 years at that point. The house was set up with his father living downstairs and B upstairs. A staircase on the inside reached the upstairs; there were two doors - one at the foot of the stairs and one at the top of the stairs and both locked from the outside. There were bars on every window of the entire house, even the second floor. I was told this was because of the neighborhood we were living in and that the locks on the doors were for my safety because his dad was a drunk.
If you think something is "off"...It probably is...Always go with your gut!!!
Although the abuser always deserves the blame for the harm that is administered....I truly believe there are many women on this site who possess the common sense and intuition that would have never allowed the above events to have ever transpired in the first place.
Many folks have no business being out here.
Use your noodles, you dopes.
She was young, she was naive, she may have been at a low point in her life where she hsd low self-esteem(this is especially what predators looks for)
it does not happen in just the BDSM world it happens in the vanilla world too, been there myself. So where on the planet should we be to be safe from predators if they exist in BDSM and the vanilla worlds. When a child is abused are they responsible or deserve what they got as well ???? Does the woman that dresses provocatively deserved to be jumped and raped? Did you never make mistakes in judgement? Were you never young and foolish and a tad too trusting? Were you never taken advantage of?
Men like B specifically seeking out those that are weak be it at time a women is just into a break up, that may have low self esteem , or they are naive and trusting probably like the case of the 2 14 year olds he vixtimized as well.
They turn on the charm, they spoil, they pamper, they make you feel like a goddess till they have you emotionally wrapped around their little finger beleiving they are some white knight in shining armour, it is not until they have you isolated do you become aware that something is not right by then it is already too late, do you think if she decide to bolt when she seen the windows barred he would have just let her walk , if they were in an isolated area , he would have simply taken her by force then. Who did you vote for last? did you vote for them based on their promises? did they keep them? Did you ever have someone you believein .. lie and fuck you over? did you ever get conned into a piece of drap car by a used car salesman? It is easy to point fingers and place blame but I doubt anyone will get through life without being a dope or conned at some point in their life, but that does not mean we deserve the violence that was done to Luna or other women who suffered similiar fates.
Luna is well aware she made mistakes she will be reminded of that for the rest of her life, she came on here to warn others that predators do exist and to be careful she does not need someone like yourself rubbing her nose in it , because all you succeed in accomplishing by doing is tearing away the self esteem she is fighting to rebuild, nor does she deserve it
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