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ItalianSMistress -> RE: Hard wired for BDSM? (12/15/2007 10:48:09 AM)
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I just wrote a blog about this a few days ago, thinking of a few conversations I have had about this topic,,,,here is some of it:
I have talked to woman, that have had the same general bad experience with men, for some reason, some of those woman become dominant, others submissive. That is where the innate part comes in. I have not had a really bad experience with any male, but other things I can look at and kinda point the finger so to speak at. Things in My environment that may have affected how I have relationships and such.
The funny thing is, I did not grow up with fantasies of BDSM like so many people in the lifestyle do. I did not know really anything about it until I was 18. For those of you that don’t know, the way I was introduced to this lifestyle I find is different than most. I was young, and had a boyfriend, and a girlfriend, and was sexually bored. Amie was using this dating site, one that was just local to our area. I saw it had some kind of alt area, so I thought hey, what an idea. All I said on the ad was that I was looking for something kinky and different. I replied to two of the messages I got back. One was a crossdresser, and the other a submissive male. I had ongoing relations with both of them for a while. With the male sub for about four years, he was a very well trained slave by the end of it. To My surprise, when that ended, I decided to look for a slave again, wow, I had no idea how many there were, LOL.
Now, on the other hand, there were many things in My past, before that relationship, that would suggest that I would have always been interested in BDSM. I use to play the strangest childhood games, that you could say paved the way. I even remember I use to play with this one boy all the time, (I mostly played with boys, cuz I had more in common with them) and I use to tie him to a tree and whip him with a stick, all the time, and he let Me do it, he never fought or even said no to Me. Sometimes he would cry, and I would stop, but he always let Me do it again. Now I don’t tend to stop when someone is crying,,,,,funny how things progress eh? LOL
My mother was very dominating and My father was very quiet and submissive. My sister always just took whatever shit My mother was dealing out. I would not, hence the big difference in our personalities. My father was always very submissive to Me, but not to My sister. I could do no wrong in his eyes, and he did everything for Me. Every morning he got up with Me, even tho he worked nights, he would sit with Me over breakfast and then brush My hair. He drove Me back and forth to school everyday, bc he did not want Me waiting for a bus. Once I hit about 11 I started fighting back at My mother, a few years later, she was rather submissive to Me also, but still kept her sadistic streak. My sister never did, in fact, even tho she is ten years older than Me, it turned out that I was the one that would deal with My mother for her misdeeds to My sister and her family. I think that says a lot for the “born with it” side, but there was still that environment part.
Edited to make the blog smaller, so the whole thing was not this big
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