RE: Hard wired for BDSM?

RE: Hard wired for BDSM? (Full Version)

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BondageSlaveMN -> RE: Hard wired for BDSM? (12/15/2007 6:46:46 PM)
The Dark, I tend to agree actually. The complex behaviors of BDSM are likely not hard wired. It is rare indeed to find such complex behavior genetically programmed into an animal. Mating rituals/dances in the animal kingdom are about as close as it gets. I am of the opinion that genetically one can be predisposed to the BDSM lifestyle and that this contributes, in part, to most people's ultimate embrace of said lifestyle.

adoracat -> RE: Hard wired for BDSM? (12/15/2007 9:48:19 PM)
~fast reply~ i dont think i'm hardwired for BDSM...i just like it a lot. as far as submission goes, in my case its a combination of nature and nurture. i can remember always fetching and serving as a little, and my mama teaching me by word and example that the man of the house was the Man of the house, and as females we should take care of him. he came home...and i brought him his iced tea, and took off his shoes and socks, rubbed his feet, trimmed his toenails if they needed it...this was just how things were. when i got married....my ex was pretty startled at this behavior. i was 18, and thought that this was just the way things were. i still fetch and carry and serve...although my vanilla husband isnt happy about me doing that, at the same time he misses it visibly if i dont bring him his iced tea when he gets home, or if i fail to bring him his dinner with whatever entree i have cooked cut up and ready to eat. (his mother approves of this behavior, he's the oldest son of an italian catholic mama, and she says i'm SUCH the good daughter for her son! lol) Daddy approves of the way i am. he also doesnt care how i got there, he likes the results. and i'm happy about the way i am, too. kitten, sleepy from typing. [;)]

bittermoonlight -> RE: Hard wired for BDSM? (12/15/2007 10:51:59 PM)
I often describe myself as 'just wired that way' when asked about my own views or mindset on bdsm. I see it as, my wiring mostly fits into the category of bdsm, because, like any label, it is useful in identifying and communicating things. Since my earliest memories, I've had the tendencies I have now; they matured as I did. So, yes, I think it's something of nature; I also know very kinky people who discovered they liked it later on. I think there's a difference in the way she and I experience bdsm but both of our experiences are just as rich. As for family, my mother really really likes strong women running around beating boys up and carrying whips but she is completely confused and somewhat displeased with my interest in it. So, tendencies are there, but acceptance is not.

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