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RE: Funniest Safewords - 10/1/2005 10:52:03 PM

Simian

Posts: 30
Joined: 1/3/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Evanesce

Only time I ever "safeworded" on Master, it came out as, "Hit me with that one more time, and I'm shoving it up your ass!" Needless to say, He was not amused.

Hahahahaha

It reminds me of my first play session when the Mistress said I had a nice body and I told her to shut up out of embarrassment, God did I get it!!

(in reply to Evanesce)

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Post #: 101

RE: Funniest Safewords - 10/2/2005 10:16:51 AM

MistressMelissa

Posts: 226
Joined: 11/21/2004
Status: offline

quote:

in another case, a girl who had worn out her safeword was told she was getting a new one- but I refused to tell her what it was...

Stay warm,
Lawrence

Then you get to play "Guess the Safe Word" I just keep going until you guess the safe word or I get tired......

Melissa
Mistress of Ds Haven
www.dshaven.com

(in reply to topcat)

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Post #: 102

RE: Funniest Safewords - 10/2/2005 1:54:53 PM

wantinaSireorSir

Posts: 29
Joined: 8/12/2005
Status: offline

I have actually used 2 safewords, but not sure how funny they are since they both where something I knew i could never forget. Both conserned something in restrospect to my Master or Sire at that time.

One was green, and the other was whore go figure.

(in reply to mistoferin)

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Post #: 103

RE: Funniest Safewords - 10/2/2005 8:36:56 PM

MzticStormz

Posts: 59
Joined: 3/19/2005
Status: offline

My husband and I are both Dominants.. We have a live in submissive lady with us. The other night we were playing off the cuff, and had her gagged.. My husband told her her safe gesture was to flip us off.. I nearly wet myself laughing at her expression! There was no way she would let that one slip on accident LOL

Mz Stormz

(in reply to wantinaSireorSir)

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Post #: 104

RE: Funniest Safewords - 10/3/2005 4:49:07 AM

topcat

Posts: 1675
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Tidewater, VA
Status: offline

OMG-

Why yes, that is me. How the heck are you?

Actually- I recycled the safeword, and due to her accent, She couldn't say it

email me on the otherside-

stay warm,
Lawrence

< Message edited by topcat -- 10/3/2005 5:12:26 AM >

_____________________________

-there is no remission without blood-

(in reply to mishaL)

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Post #: 105

RE: Funniest Safewords - 10/3/2005 1:04:11 PM

mishaL

Posts: 3
Joined: 9/30/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mishaL <----- BTW, before you spit your coffee, that isn't you :)

quote:

ORIGINAL: topcat

OMG-

Why yes, that is me. How the heck are you?

L,

<shaking head and laughing> You missed it. My point was that the L attached to misha wasn't for you.

Yes, it was pretty clear that "topcat" was you. The picture of you pretty much gave it away, along with your arrogant use of bold type. :) In addition to my diction, my memory is still pretty clear.

Although, I do wonder why the small t in topcat ... thinking of changing teams perhaps?

Anyway, I guess I should have known that the safeword was recycled. I don't even want to know if anything else was!

What do you mean email you on the other side? I don't see an email for for you.

m

< Message edited by mishaL -- 10/3/2005 4:32:26 PM >

(in reply to topcat)

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Post #: 106

RE: Funniest Safewords - 10/3/2005 2:09:26 PM

Soulhuntre

Posts: 223
Joined: 9/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsWhip
What's the funniest safeword you've ever used or heard?

I don't play with them... so I have no funny stories to tell ont hat score really.

However around the houses of myself and some folks I am close to a heartfealt "do it to HER!" (followed by pointing) can sometimes shift the focus of our attention if it is funny enough :)

A friend did once ask me if I would be her safecall... I said sure (even though she knew I think they are silly) and then told her that we needed a "code word" so I would know she needed help and he was lisntening to her speak. It thought about it and decided...

"I do wish he would just be a man and fuck me already"

...was perfect.

She changed her mind and asked someone else :)

(in reply to MsWhip)

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Post #: 107

RE: Funniest Safewords - 10/3/2005 3:24:31 PM

ZandD

Posts: 59
Joined: 1/24/2005
Status: offline

quote:

Holy crap...no kidding!

Taggard

quote:

For some reason, the thought of this being an actual safe word is hilarious, especially since I hear a poor woman in my imagination stating quite empahtically and with gusto "HOLY CRAP!"

Of course,a year and a half ago, the first time (and last) that I used wax on my Lady while she was tied to a medical exam table, I didn't hear any safe words (though there was one in place), just one long, terrible, ear-splitting scream. Admittedly, that was a safe YELL and it worked as I stopped immediately. Every time I light a candle, even though this may be my own guilty conscience, I feel like I'm getting the "you'd better not come anywhere near me with that thing" look.

"HOLY CRAP!".......now that's funny.....

(in reply to TallDarkAndWitty)

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Post #: 108

RE: Funniest Safewords - 10/3/2005 9:25:54 PM

topcat

Posts: 1675
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Tidewater, VA
Status: offline

quote:

My point was that the L attached to misha wasn't for you.

Midear M.-

I rather thought that was the case...

quote:

What do you mean email you on the other side? I don't see an email for for you

I meant message me on the personals side ( just click the 'sponsored by Collarme' box at the top of the page and find my profile, so we coiuld catch up.

Stay warm,
Lawrence

_____________________________

-there is no remission without blood-

(in reply to mishaL)

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Post #: 109

RE: Funniest Safewords - 10/3/2005 9:29:56 PM

Lordandmaster

Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline

I kinda like "Sir, please fuck me in the ass instead."

But that's just me.

(in reply to MsWhip)

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Post #: 110

RE: Funniest Safewords - 10/4/2005 3:05:54 AM

satyrgirl

Posts: 7
Joined: 9/27/2005
Status: offline

Poppa Smurf.
He said picturing Poppa Smurf in full bondage gear was the most unsexy thing he could come up with. No matter who I play with now or what the safe word is, it always pops into my head.

(in reply to Lordandmaster)

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Post #: 111

RE: Funniest Safewords - 10/15/2005 6:16:44 AM

mystickitty

Posts: 1
Joined: 4/6/2005
Status: offline

quote:

A sammie friend of mine once said her safeword was "You hit like a pussy."

And of course, as she hoped I would, I completely ignored her when she said it.

Hyde

and you ignored her safe word ...?!?! hmmmmmmm

(in reply to MasterHyde)

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Post #: 112

RE: Funniest Safewords - 10/15/2005 8:07:29 AM

subbie333

Posts: 86
Joined: 9/19/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Hallittlelolita

Master and i dont have safewords because i am His slave/wife and He knows my limits. i believe slaves shouldnt have safe words because a slave dosent have choices it's up to her/his Master if they do or not. i dont need them because my Master says he knows me more than i know my self and i am an open book and he knows all the pages

Sincerely andie and her Master Hal

um, i believe that this post is off-topic, isn't it?

subbie_333

(in reply to Hallittlelolita)

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Post #: 113

RE: Funniest Safewords - 10/15/2005 12:40:17 PM

Wolfie648

Posts: 600
Joined: 9/14/2005
Status: offline

quote:

um, i believe that this post is off-topic, isn't it?

So is policing others :-)

She thought she had a perspective to add and did it. I enjoyed reading it.

D (owner of j).

(in reply to subbie333)

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Post #: 114

RE: Funniest Safewords - 10/15/2005 9:33:05 PM

Sensualips

Posts: 1013
Joined: 10/8/2005
Status: offline

I have heard hippopatamus.

I once tried to use "soggy pencils." (Yes, there was a reason at the time.) When I considered using it, I realized I forgot what it was and figured I'd just say red if I needed to. I didn't.

(in reply to wolffeathers)

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Post #: 115

RE: Funniest Safewords - 10/15/2005 10:31:17 PM

MizSuz

Posts: 1881
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SherriA

Hahaha, exactly! I've been known to say something along the lines of "If you do that again I'm going to reach down your throat and yank your balls up inside your body before I shove them out your fucking ASS...and no, that's not an order, it's information that I think you should have right fucking NOW." Yeah, I wasn't exactly where either of us wanted me to be when I said that. :)

Yeah, but you're so damned FUNNY when you yank your fist back and stomp your foot. It just makes me laugh, and want to do it again!

HAAAAHAHAHAHAHA

And you KNOW that laughing at you usually takes the wind out of your sail just enough, too.

_____________________________

“The more you love, the more you can love—and the more intensely you love. Nor is there any limit on how many you can love. If a person had time enough, he could love all of that majority who are decent and just.”
- Robert Heinlein

(in reply to SherriA)

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Post #: 116

RE: Funniest Safewords - 10/16/2005 9:06:45 AM

foxglove716

Posts: 648
Joined: 7/4/2005
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"muggle." It makes a magical situation dull pretty darn quick

(in reply to MsWhip)

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Post #: 117

RE: Funniest Safewords - 10/16/2005 10:20:44 AM

MissHalle

Posts: 12
Joined: 7/12/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dr24

quote:

More a funny situation than funny safeword. i was once given a safeword and a gag. go figure.

Ok but really what actually happens inthis situation? If you're gagged and really want them to stop?

In this case a Dominant might establish a non verbal safe signal. For instance, putting an object such as a metal ball in the submissive's hand. If they drop it, the scene stops.

(in reply to Dr24)

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Post #: 118

RE: Funniest Safewords - 10/16/2005 10:32:19 AM

kinkypinky

Posts: 7
Joined: 10/16/2005
Status: offline

my very first Dominant required my safe words to be as such
yellow/slow down = hippity hop
red/stop = my first name

Funny how one would think it would be easy to remember that one in a situation, but there were times that i had to picture my birth certificate for my red stop safe word.

DONT LAUGH...IT HAPPENS!!! lol

_____________________________

"...You say that like it is a bad thing..."

(in reply to MissHalle)

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Post #: 119

RE: Funniest Safewords - 10/16/2005 11:01:53 PM

sinbetweens

Posts: 23
Joined: 10/16/2005
Status: offline

"Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice."

At first I objected because it was a mouthful, but you know, even a squeaky "beet!" would have gotten the point quite well. Also, the one time he needed it, it did change the tone of the moment pretty quickly, which is the entire point of safewording, heh. And I'm pretty sure I will never forget that moment. :)

(in reply to mistoferin)

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Post #: 120