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Truth - 12/17/2007 5:00:38 PM

Griswold

Posts: 2739
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline

I don't expect everyone in town to dispell their guts here....but here's mine (splayed);

I don't know how to take care of myself.

I truly don't.

I'm 49. Single. I'm okay looking..no one's written a song about me, or asked me to do cover work but...no one runs to the other side of the street when I walk down the other either.

I haven't a fucking clue how to make scrambled eggs.

(Popeye....you're gonna love this shit....I've been chewing on your ass for years).

My socks typically end up at the nearest outpost, which usually means "over there--->", I have absolutely no fucking clue.

I'm 49 fucking years old and I have absofuckinglootly no clue how to take care of myself.

I'm remodeling my place....it's been a mess for 6 months...a while back...I had a girl come in and do all the shit that needs to be done (until the remodel started)...my place is a complete dump...it's another 3 months until it's done....

And I feel like a complete fucking putz.

Because I can't fucking make pancakes.

(Now...I'd like to say...I'm opening myself up here....997 of the other 1,000 men here won't admit it....but...they can't fucking make pancakes either...I'm okay with that. {The other 3 are lying sacks})

I am admitting that I am a weak weasel....I DON'T UNDERSTAND why socks don't belong on the floor! I ADMIT IT!!!!!

They're dirty!

They don't belong on my bed (I Know This!!!!) where my cats can sniff them and think they're me!

On the floor...no.

I know this because my ex-wife told me.

How do I know this?

Because she told me this the exact same day she told me that peeing in the shower was unsanitary.

(She was wrong....but I didn't fight it).

So....

This is all a rather long way of saying....

I can't take care of myself.

(Gawwwd I'm such a putz).

< Message edited by Griswold -- 12/17/2007 5:01:54 PM >

Post #: 1

RE: Truth - 12/17/2007 5:05:45 PM

batshalom

Posts: 1990
Joined: 9/17/2007
Status: offline

I can take care of myself and I pee in the shower.

I can make scrambled eggs, pancakes AND hamburger helper. And I pee in the shower.

My dirty socks, dirty undies, my UM's dirty clothes go in the hamper. But I pee in the shower.

Don't worry, Gris. You can buy frozen breakfast food now. Go have a good whiz.

(in reply to Griswold)

Post #: 2

RE: Truth - 12/17/2007 5:11:01 PM

Level

Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline

Maybe we should start a poll about pissing in the shower?

Truth is an interesting thing; so many people run away from it......

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to batshalom)

Post #: 3

RE: Truth - 12/17/2007 5:41:51 PM

Griswold

Posts: 2739
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: batshalom

I can take care of myself and I pee in the shower.

I can make scrambled eggs, pancakes AND hamburger helper. And I pee in the shower.

My dirty socks, dirty undies, my UM's dirty clothes go in the hamper. But I pee in the shower.

Don't worry, Gris. You can buy frozen breakfast food now. Go have a good whiz.

Marry me.

We'll make a signifcant mess intertwined.

(Buying frozen breakfast....that involves shopping I fear).

(in reply to batshalom)

Post #: 4

RE: Truth - 12/17/2007 5:50:13 PM

Kalista07

Posts: 4240
Joined: 7/1/2007
Status: offline

Griswold,
Thanks for posting this....Truth be told i think You can actually take care of Yourself...You have many of the skills and abilities and talents that i'll never have...OMG!! You are freaking remodeling a house for God's sake....Plus, i am not capable of any of that and i can't make freaking pancakes...The bastards refuse to turn out right when i try and make them...i personally think that at some point in my life i pissed off the pancake farey...BASTARD!!!
Anyway, my solution: that's what God made restaurants for...

But must adamamently deny peeing in the shower....Although, as long as You don't tell anyone i'll tell You that the other day i was in the shower and i had to pee, and the thought seriously crossed my mind..But i couldn't do it..

Kali

< Message edited by Kalista07 -- 12/17/2007 5:57:07 PM >

_____________________________

“Love me when I least deserve it, because that's when I really need it.”
~~Sweedish Proverb

(in reply to Griswold)

Post #: 5

RE: Truth - 12/17/2007 5:54:37 PM

SilentTigresss

Posts: 261
Joined: 1/18/2004
Status: offline

(hoping no one yells at me) As i do appreciate the honesty, i have to say it was quite funny.
And...... yes, i do pee in the shower too. :)

(in reply to Griswold)

Post #: 6

RE: Truth - 12/17/2007 5:56:09 PM

lauren0221

Posts: 681
Joined: 8/29/2006
Status: offline

I can cook,

but I pee in the shower too.

(in reply to Griswold)

Post #: 7

RE: Truth - 12/17/2007 5:59:25 PM

SeeksOnlyOne

Posts: 2012
Joined: 5/14/2007
Status: offline

i think everyone pees in the shower.....some just wont admit it....i mean how can you not pee with that water running and all........or maybe thats just me

_____________________________

it aint no good til it hurts just a little bit....jimmy somerville

in those moments of solitude, does everyone sometimes think they are insane? or is it just me?

(in reply to lauren0221)

Post #: 8

RE: Truth - 12/17/2007 5:59:34 PM

LadyChef

Posts: 105
Joined: 11/11/2007
Status: offline

Refreshing to see a man being honest and venting on this site....about himself! (nothing new about that!)

_____________________________

You reap what you sow

(in reply to Griswold)

Post #: 9

RE: Truth - 12/17/2007 6:23:05 PM

laurell3

Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

Damn it, now I want pancakes....but I pee in the shower too.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to LadyChef)

Post #: 10

RE: Truth - 12/17/2007 6:25:34 PM

YourhandMyAss

Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline

running water on and around me alone doesn't make me have to pee, however, if I have a full bladder from drinking all day then running water will just make me insane with the need to pee.

quote:

ORIGINAL: SeeksOnlyOne

i think everyone pees in the shower.....some just wont admit it....i mean how can you not pee with that water running and all........or maybe thats just me

(in reply to SeeksOnlyOne)

Post #: 11

RE: Truth - 12/17/2007 6:41:50 PM

proudsub

Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline

quote:

I don't know how to take care of myself.

Neither does Hubby. That's why i was so concerned when i had my hip surgery last month. For the last 5 weeks He has done the bare minimum to take care of both of us and our cat. I am pretty functional again but still using a walker. The only thing He cooked was oatmeal, everything else was take-out. I had to step Him through the laundry, but it got done. Cleaning was non-existent except for what i've been able to do. We've been eating off paper plates and take-out cartons because He doesn't want to wash a dish. Only half of our Xmas decorations are up because He hates doing that kind of thing. But we have survived and i figure i can catch up on things as soon as i get off this damn walker. I hired a cleaning lady (first time in 40 yrs of marriage) to come on Fri. because we have guests coming on Sat. for 5 days. It took awhile but i got over my guilt of not doing my chores and having Him wait on me.

So you're not alone Griswold.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan

(in reply to Griswold)

Post #: 12

RE: Truth - 12/17/2007 6:59:13 PM

dawntreader

Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Griswold

I don't expect everyone in town to dispell their guts here....but here's mine (splayed);

I don't know how to take care of myself.

Gris,
i do not always make pancakes turn out...don't know why that is since they come from a box - but everytime i make them, there is an anticipation about whether or not they will be edible (or at the least, identifiable)

Fear not my friend, i pee in the shower too! Hell, its tame compared to where i pee in the wild when backcountry hiking!!!

Now socks...i am alittle anal about that - thats why the gods invented "the sock draw" and "the laundry hamper".

Now go get a protien shake, stir in a little "green super food", and take care of yourself!!

peace of pee,
j

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to Griswold)

Post #: 13

RE: Truth - 12/17/2007 7:03:09 PM

Griswold

Posts: 2739
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: proudsub

quote:

I don't know how to take care of myself.

Neither does Hubby. That's why i was so concerned when i had my hip surgery last month. For the last 5 weeks He has done the bare minimum to take care of both of us and our cat. I am pretty functional again but still using a walker. The only thing He cooked was oatmeal, everything else was take-out. I had to step Him through the laundry, but it got done. Cleaning was non-existent except for what i've been able to do. We've been eating off paper plates and take-out cartons because He doesn't want to wash a dish. Only half of our Xmas decorations are up because He hates doing that kind of thing. But we have survived and i figure i can catch up on things as soon as i get off this damn walker. I hired a cleaning lady (first time in 40 yrs of marriage) to come on Fri. because we have guests coming on Sat. for 5 days. It took awhile but i got over my guilt of not doing my chores and having Him wait on me.

So you're not alone Griswold.

See...I perfectly understand your husbands issues.

Put me in front of 350 engineers, free pizza, 3 elective credits....ask me to make a 2 hour impromptu talk....I'm fine.

I can easily explain to them why a 6,000 PSI compressive beam needs to go in front of a 125 PSI longitudinal snow load cross beam, accompanied by a universal strut system....I'm all good.

People will write stories about that conversation....but socks....

I just don't get it.

(Sue me).

(in reply to proudsub)

Post #: 14

RE: Truth - 12/17/2007 7:04:00 PM

Sinergy

Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline

My ex was a slob.

When I moved out from her I refused to live in a shit hole. So I taught myself to clean my house, cook my meals, do my laundry, not leave dirty dishes all over the place, etc.

Then, because I was working two jobs and figured I know how to clean a toilet, I hired somebody to come in and clean my bathroom. I pay her to clean twice a month at an amount I make working 4 hours on the job.

What it required for me is a sense of mindfulness and a realization that the only way I could avoid the shitty feeling of waking up to dirty dishes is to clean the damn dishes the night before.

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle

(in reply to dawntreader)

Post #: 15

RE: Truth - 12/17/2007 7:05:15 PM

Griswold

Posts: 2739
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: dawntreader

quote:

ORIGINAL: Griswold

I don't expect everyone in town to dispell their guts here....but here's mine (splayed);

I don't know how to take care of myself.

Gris,
i do not always make pancakes turn out...don't know why that is since they come from a box - but everytime i make them, there is an anticipation about whether or not they will be edible (or at the least, identifiable)

Fear not my friend, i pee in the shower too! Hell, its tame compared to where i pee in the wild when backcountry hiking!!!

Now socks...i am alittle anal about that - thats why the gods invented "the sock draw" and "the laundry hamper".

Now go get a protien shake, stir in a little "green super food", and take care of yourself!!

peace of pee,
j

(Pancakes come from a box??????)

(in reply to dawntreader)

Post #: 16

RE: Truth - 12/17/2007 7:22:44 PM

laurell3

Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

Are you kidding? For a price they have everything you can imagine premade now and some of it is really good. The premade mashed potatoes (quite expensive) are better than what my mother has ever made. Yes pancakes, cakes, salads, full meals...all premade.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to Griswold)

Post #: 17

RE: Truth - 12/17/2007 7:30:46 PM

batshalom

Posts: 1990
Joined: 9/17/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Griswold

quote:

ORIGINAL: batshalom

I can take care of myself and I pee in the shower.

I can make scrambled eggs, pancakes AND hamburger helper. And I pee in the shower.

My dirty socks, dirty undies, my UM's dirty clothes go in the hamper. But I pee in the shower.

Don't worry, Gris. You can buy frozen breakfast food now. Go have a good whiz.

Marry me.

We'll make a signifcant mess intertwined.

(Buying frozen breakfast....that involves shopping I fear).

Gris Baby, I'll come cook for you, clean for you (at least wash your socks), and have a rollickingly happy shower pee with you, I'll fix pancakes that aren't from a box (not too hard to throw flour, baking powder, sugar, and milk together) and I'll mash you some real potatoes ... but please oh please don't fling me in that marriage patch.

(in reply to Griswold)

Post #: 18

RE: Truth - 12/17/2007 7:46:04 PM

OutsideLkngIn

Posts: 2
Joined: 4/21/2007
Status: offline

I'll weigh in here. I always thought I was the oddball because I'm a man and CAN take care of myself. I make scrambled eggs and pancakes and sourdough bread and mashed potatoes (real and instant). I also don't like my dirty clothes laying about because it takes more time to gather them all up when it's time to wash them than it does to throw them in a hamper when I take them off at night.

Which is not to say I think I'm better than Griswold, for the male gender he is the norm not me. We all things we don't or can't do. Me? I don't like to mow the lawn or tend the yard at all and I freeze up when speaking in public. But I do like to pee in the shower and it's refreshing to hear women confess to doing that as well.

-----------------
Thought provoking saying goes here.

(in reply to batshalom)

Post #: 19

RE: Truth - 12/17/2007 7:58:57 PM

Dddylilgrl

Posts: 56
Joined: 7/20/2007
Status: offline

Kudos to you OutsideLkngin, it's nice to hear that yes a man can put his dirty socks in a hamper instead of leaving them on the dinner table. lol. Yes I pee in the shower to.

(in reply to OutsideLkngIn)

Post #: 20

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