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Male lesbian? - 12/21/2007 11:17:16 AM

vanvonwitz

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Greetings,

I recently found the concept - "male lesbian", which is very interesting, but it looks somewhat strange. Would like to know if it is real, or not. And if there realy are any female-male lesbian couples.

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RE: Male lesbian? - 12/21/2007 11:23:55 AM

darchChylde

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perhaps in the case of a man who honestly gender identifies as a woman, yet still is attracted to women

but i can't help but think of the immature junior high boasts of being a "lesbian trapped in a man's body"

i think that this can be a serious issue, but would more commonly be a juvenile claim by an idiot

edited to add this link: http://www.love-shy.com/Gilmartin/Chapter05/Malelesbian.html

as far as a female/male lesbian couple; i just don't see it happening without gender reassignment surgery, as a lesbian by definition is not turned on by the bits and pieces that physically mark one as male... but hey, anything is possible

< Message edited by darchChylde -- 12/21/2007 11:28:06 AM >

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RE: Male lesbian? - 12/21/2007 12:15:41 PM

pixelslave

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RE: Male lesbian? - 12/21/2007 12:19:35 PM

Aswad

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Bit too cloudy to tell, methinks...

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RE: Male lesbian? - 12/21/2007 1:03:17 PM

slaveboyforyou

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I won't be a smart ass about this question. "Male lesbian" is a guy that prefers butch looking girls.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=male+lesbian

I've seen a few men that like dating "butch" looking women. It's just a preference some men have.

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RE: Male lesbian? - 12/21/2007 1:12:56 PM

RumpusParable

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DarchChylde nailed it! Especially with the backup/proof of slaveboyforu's Urban Dictionary addition... Straight guys using juvenile jokes or transgendered persons indicating their identity.

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RE: Male lesbian? - 12/21/2007 1:14:42 PM

onegoodgirl

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I don't know if I'd consider the "urban dictionary" a incontrovertible source. It's slang... albeit, an oxymoron that contradicts itself, but still just.. slang.

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RE: Male lesbian? - 12/21/2007 1:17:23 PM

tasha_tart

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With apologies for a lowering the tone of the discussion, all I can think of when reading this thread is a South Park episode in which the boys are arguing over who's a bigger lesbian (of course Cartman is designated a fatter lesbian.)

Soorry...you may now return to a serious discussion.

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RE: Male lesbian? - 12/21/2007 1:23:25 PM

darchChylde

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quote:

ORIGINAL: tasha_tart

Sorry...you may now return to a serious discussion.

Tasha

this is a serious discussion? i thought it was just some more, albeit rather off, wank fodder; did i miss something?

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RE: Male lesbian? - 12/21/2007 1:34:34 PM

txnights05

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quote:

ORIGINAL: vanvonwitz

Greetings,

I recently found the concept - "male lesbian", which is very interesting, but it looks somewhat strange. Would like to know if it is real, or not. And if there realy are any female-male lesbian couples.

Then there is my biological brother who was born anatomically male but who lived as a female for many many years in a relationship with another anatomical male living as a woman... did that make them physically gay and emotionally lesbian?

pam

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RE: Male lesbian? - 12/21/2007 2:02:30 PM

petdave

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quote:

ORIGINAL: tasha_tart

With apologies for a lowering the tone of the discussion, all I can think of when reading this thread is a South Park episode in which the boys are arguing over who's a bigger lesbian (of course Cartman is designated a fatter lesbian.)

Well, like Meg Griffin (Family Guy), i am of course a Super-Huge Mega Lesbian

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RE: Male lesbian? - 12/21/2007 2:09:49 PM

ShaktiSama

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I like to think of myself as a bisexual man trapped in a bisexual woman's body.

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RE: Male lesbian? - 12/21/2007 2:16:30 PM

MMMMudd

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More silliness

As for myself I find myself really really attracted to butch looking women, I don't know if that makes me a male lesbian so much as a dyke hag. I tend to associate cute aesthetics with fragile and useless, I realise that isn't always the case but if trapped in a dark alley, (or just about anywhere else) I'd rather be there with Tracy Chapman than Britney Spears. I guess it's true that I have a "type."

I had an extremely silly, conversation the other night with a butch friend about my fascination with Subaru Brats. If Subaru's are stereotypically a car preferred by lesbians, (hence the flying vagina grill on the new models) Does that make a souped up classic Subaru, half truck, like the Brat, a lesbian hot rod? It's one thing that my friend always calls me on my issues, another that she's so good at it. She says I'm probably the only guy out there who's thought about buying a car with cruising for "butches" in mind.

Mudd

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RE: Male lesbian? - 12/21/2007 2:17:33 PM

PanthersMom

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i know of only one person i would call a male lesbian, only due to the person's genetic code. he was the father of a friend of mine who decided he was a woman in a man's body, had the reassignment surgery and then went on to have a lesbian relationship. i have no idea how things are going long term, i've lost touch with the family. but that's the only person i could actually say i believed was a "male" lesbian.

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RE: Male lesbian? - 12/21/2007 3:14:12 PM

aidan

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quote:

ORIGINAL: darchChylde
edited to add this link:
http://www.love-shy.com/Gilmartin/Chapter05/Malelesbian.html

I know this subject's gonna get a lot of flak, but I really want to discuss this link.

I actually identify a lot with what that portion of the study shored up.

I've even jokingly said before that I was a "guy lesbian". A lot of the roles and feelings that are traditionally associated with women in heterosexual relationships are things that I exhibit. In my relationships I'm usually the partner who's doting, nurturing, and more emotionally open. I really do prefer to be the one persued and courted, always liked when a woman showed an interest and asked me out. And, of course, I've always prefered women to be dominant in the relationship. I've never been fully comfortable with most other men, especially talking about sex, because they always seemed brutish and withdrawn, and I felt ostracized for not being the same.

The OP may have started the thread as a lark, or looking for wanking fodder, but I think this could get some traction if we thought about it seriously.

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RE: Male lesbian? - 12/21/2007 3:36:03 PM

darchChylde

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quote:

ORIGINAL: aidan

quote:

ORIGINAL: darchChylde
edited to add this link:
http://www.love-shy.com/Gilmartin/Chapter05/Malelesbian.html

I know this subject's gonna get a lot of flak, but I really want to discuss this link.

I actually identify a lot with what that portion of the study shored up.

I've even jokingly said before that I was a "guy lesbian". A lot of the roles and feelings that are traditionally associated with women in heterosexual relationships are things that I exhibit. In my relationships I'm usually the partner who's doting, nurturing, and more emotionally open. I really do prefer to be the one persued and courted, always liked when a woman showed an interest and asked me out. And, of course, I've always prefered women to be dominant in the relationship. I've never been fully comfortable with most other men, especially talking about sex, because they always seemed brutish and withdrawn, and I felt ostracized for not being the same.

The OP may have started the thread as a lark, or looking for wanking fodder, but I think this could get some traction if we thought about it seriously.

i have to agree with aidan here, as i have in the past offered constructive criticism and advice on a subject that i (and most others) deemed as wank fodder (the reference i make is to a post about suspension from the testicles)... thus, my first post was given seriously with an attempt to be informative and not condescending; and an opinion given after taking the OP as serious

but yes; in many of my mannerisms and perceptions, i also am very feminine though i am somewhat hostile to being referred to in a feminene manner (unless you call me a hair queen)... i, as i have stated before, consider myself to be a heterosexual man happily residing in the body of a man

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I'm a male dominant switch whose experienced as a poly sub to a dominant woman
.
Where the fuck do I post?

Proud Owner and Protector of chyldeschylde.

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RE: Male lesbian? - 12/21/2007 4:35:27 PM

ShaktiSama

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Yes, this "love-shy" book is interesting. It makes me wonder whether the author has considered that some or all of his subjects may be sexually submissive men whose "love shyness" is caused by inability to connect with a dominant woman? Certainly, I see a lot of familiar character traits, childhood experiences and personal feelings here which bring to mind many men that I have known who had varying levels of submissiveness in their relationships with women.

Many of these men went on to live happy lives once their self-isolating habits had been broken. They quickly gained the basic skills necessary to connect with women who were at least slightly more aggressive in the vanilla sense--the sort of women who pursue men and provide motivating force in relationships.

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RE: Male lesbian? - 12/21/2007 5:16:14 PM

vanvonwitz

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About the "wank fodder", let me tell you that you are totally wrong. The question, was placed for a simple reason - the way i feel about the obligatory and traditional position of the male in a relation. Because, if what it is said in the article by Gil Martin, is true, maibe i am not so submissive as I tought, maybe was just an expression of the way i perceive things. So I am sorry I ofended someone with my curiosity and need to have some honest opinions about the subject.

In the question about female/male lesbian couples, the question was related primarily with the possibility of an heterosexual female, to engage in a relation with someone that feels like a "male lesbian" - The Gil Martin defenition. - "All wanted to keep their male genitalia; all wanted to remain as males. However, all deeply envied the perogatives of the female gender and truly believed that these perogatives fitted their own inborn temperaments far more harmoniously than the pattern of behavioral expectations to which males are required to adhere."

But thanks anyway, it is always good to know all the opinions, even if some are not as serious as others, because variance always brings richness to all.

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RE: Male lesbian? - 12/21/2007 5:17:26 PM

Gwynvyd

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MMMMudd

More silliness

As for myself I find myself really really attracted to butch looking women, I don't know if that makes me a male lesbian so much as a dyke hag. I tend to associate cute aesthetics with fragile and useless, I realise that isn't always the case but if trapped in a dark alley, (or just about anywhere else) I'd rather be there with Tracy Chapman than Britney Spears. I guess it's true that I have a "type."

I had an extremely silly, conversation the other night with a butch friend about my fascination with Subaru Brats. If Subaru's are stereotypically a car preferred by lesbians, (hence the flying vagina grill on the new models) Does that make a souped up classic Subaru, half truck, like the Brat, a lesbian hot rod? It's one thing that my friend always calls me on my issues, another that she's so good at it. She says I'm probably the only guy out there who's thought about buying a car with cruising for "butches" in mind.

Mudd

Sorry to hijack!

Hmm never owned nor had the wish to own a Subaru.. none of my GF's or ex's have one either.. it must be a West coast lez thing maybe.

Most of us here sport around in PT Cruisers or pick up trucks...

Never known a guy to cruise for butch women.. interesting. Usualy the hangers on or now new term Dyke hags... are looking to try to pick up on some of the Bi girls.. or hang out with the lipstick lez. Too funny.

As for male lesbians I in general roll my eyes at that proclaimation... However I do know one. He is my lil subbie Jamie. He is more of a chick then I am most times. I love him for it. Plus he looks great in ladies undies. That helps. *WEG*
But honestly he does have a lot of attunement with his feminine side, and can be very emotionaly open. I have loved that in him since HS.

Gwyn,
Lipstick in the streets, dyke in the.. well you know the rest.

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RE: Male lesbian? - 12/21/2007 5:54:22 PM

petdave

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quote:

ORIGINAL: vanvonwitz
In the question about female/male lesbian couples, the question was related primarily with the possibility of an heterosexual female, to engage in a relation with someone that feels like a "male lesbian" - The Gil Martin defenition. - "All wanted to keep their male genitalia; all wanted to remain as males. However, all deeply envied the perogatives of the female gender and truly believed that these perogatives fitted their own inborn temperaments far more harmoniously than the pattern of behavioral expectations to which males are required to adhere."

But thanks anyway, it is always good to know all the opinions, even if some are not as serious as others, because variance always brings richness to all.

Sorry, first-time posters tend to get the stinkeye when they raise topics of prurient interest... just one of those things. Lots of Wanker Rage hereabouts.

i don't really see the term as being appropriate in the circumstances covered on the Martin link. If you have a penis, and are comfortable with your penis, and make love to a woman in a manly fashion, the "Lesbian" label is really a stretch, IMO. i tend to think that a better description is a "Femme Male" (although many folks would assume that "Femme" would extend to appearance, which isn't necessarily the case).

And for what it's worth, i can relate to a lot of the things described in the article, but mixed in with some TG issues, and so forth, so this is not at all a bash.

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