When your dom is disspapointed in you (male)

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All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> When your dom is disspapointed in you (male)

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When your dom is disspapointed in you (male) - 12/22/2007 8:53:59 AM

BlackSakura

Posts: 131
Joined: 7/23/2006
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How do male subs/slaves feel when they know their dominant is dissapointed in you? I know how females can get/feel pretty emotional.

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RE: When your dom is disspapointed in you (male) - 12/22/2007 10:00:33 AM

lockmeupplease

Posts: 202
Joined: 8/9/2006
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Actually, nothing makes me feel worse and I probably try TOO hard to get back in my Mistress's favor.

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RE: When your dom is disspapointed in you (male) - 12/22/2007 10:08:16 AM

petdave

Posts: 2479
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Maybe it's naive, but i tend to assume that it's pretty universal to be upset when you disappoint someone you care about.

i tend to take it really hard, myself... It's probably frustrating to my wife sometimes, because when i fail at something i'm trying to do for her i can get really upset, and she ends up having to convince me that she's not really disappointed... So it's kind of a double-whammy, she doesn't get what she wants, and she has to deal with me

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RE: When your dom is disspapointed in you (male) - 12/23/2007 2:06:36 PM

Kraker

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Joined: 7/2/2005
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My Owner and Master is very demanding and it is ery difficult not to disappoint my Master from time to time...I feel ashame...and the punishment afterword is always frightful hard and cruel. My Master will have no mercy. He only wants the best of his property and slave - expects his propertyand slave to do his very best no matter what he has demanded.

slave o

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RE: When your dom is disspapointed in you (male) - 12/23/2007 10:32:46 PM

trueshadow

Posts: 388
Joined: 1/1/2005
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Terrible! There is no punishment greater than knowing you have disappointed your Superior. I also get worried that she will abandon me. Since much of my self-worth is tied up in my Superior, I would take a loss like that very hard if I were released.

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RE: When your dom is disspapointed in you (male) - 12/23/2007 11:29:05 PM

flowspen

Posts: 133
Joined: 5/5/2007
From: Memphis
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I always hate to think of disappointing Mistress. My feelings come in waves at first it doesnt feel real and I am more stuck in my mind wondering "What did I do" or "How could I have been sooo stupid" but as I listen to Mistress express her disappointment it starts to sink in from my mind down into my heart. If her level of disappointment is vast I feel alot of pain, fear and even anger towards myself. Actually it just hurts, it hurts my pride of being a good sub, my ego in believing in my abilities as a sub and most of all it hurts my heart because it means I have failed at my primary goal of making her happy. It's funny this is kind of current for me as I have disappointed her recently and it sucks and no words can explane how I feel inside about it.

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RE: When your dom is disspapointed in you (male) - 12/25/2007 10:31:50 AM

ligar59

Posts: 55
Joined: 9/11/2005
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And why would you feel there would be a difference between genders? A sub is a sub, gender has no bearing least that I can see

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RE: When your dom is disspapointed in you (male) - 12/25/2007 7:31:46 PM

pixelslave

Posts: 1444
Joined: 8/19/2006
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I think the answer to your question depends on why I've disappointed my Mistress as to how I'd feel. Was it because of a failure to communicate between us? Did I not understand her desires or did she not communicate them to me in a way that "I'd get it"? Regardles, I'd still be disappointed in myself that I'd not pleased her, but the degree would vary with the reason. Was I delayed by a traffic jam or an auto accident? Did something happen with my kids, whom she would know and understand must come first in an emergency, that prevented me from doing as she wished? The list of reasons for not pleasing her without being specific to a situation are endless. The bottom line is that I'm only human, as is she. As such, there may be reasons beyond my control for not pleasing her.

There often is much to learn when a disappointment happens by sitting down and discussing it, which I'd expect we would do. How could her disappointment have been prevented? How could she have better set me up for success to please her? How could her needs have been communicated to me differently? Is there a way I could have pleased her differently which would have have produced the same results for her? IOW, the two of us can sit down and think outside of the box and look at the situation along with all the possibilities for handling it differently in the future. We can choose to learn from the experience, thus improving our relationship in the process. It doesn't have to be a totally negative experience that some would turn it into.

- pixel

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