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RE: Poachers... - 12/29/2007 12:32:35 PM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		whatever category you desire to classify me under i don't care

there is only 1 reason why i would view back - it grows larger every single day


< Message edited by sambamanslilgirl -- 12/29/2007 12:34:07 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 61
RE: Poachers... - 12/29/2007 1:28:09 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

I have to ask, why respond at all?  Why not ignore them?  That's what I do and I rarely have issues with people repeatedly begging me for responses.



I have to ask, why the interest in how other people respond to disrespect?  Five posts on a thread about a subject matter of no importance to you is interesting, too.  Is it important that everyone respond to rudeness in a way that is appropriate to you?

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: Poachers... - 12/29/2007 4:11:37 PM   
adoracat


Posts: 1779
Joined: 2/16/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lronitulstahp

quote:

 
Maybe they've seen you in the forums and just wanted to read your profile? It isn't necessarily sexual interest someone is showing just by reading your profile!   
   Guilty, as charged....


i've seen several people that i've interacted with on the boards having checked my profile...its pretty dang bare. 

and i have one dominant that subscribed to my journal, i think he's just waiting for the chance to pounce "when the inevitable happens, and you break off with that other dom".  *eyeroll*

i see it this way:  if i dont respond by being thrilled to have J Random Dominant's attention....how can s/he poach me?

kitten, not a fish nor an egg.

(in reply to lronitulstahp)
Profile   Post #: 63
RE: Poachers... - 12/29/2007 4:49:09 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline
quote:

Five posts on a thread about a subject matter of no importance to you is interesting, too.


I don't want to read through my many long-winded posts on the topic, so maybe you can point out exactly where I said on this thread that the subject matter was of no importantance to me.  I almost always find it interesting to see how people react to things.


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(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 64
RE: Poachers... - 12/29/2007 5:48:33 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: julietsierra

*shrug* So far, I haven't found that anything is worth more than a "no thank you." And if someone wants to call my Master names...well... I know how to use the block feature. I mean, it's not like what they're saying is actually impacting his life, my life or our relationship.

juliet


No one has outright stated that they were "better" than my Daddy... so I wouldn't know


_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to julietsierra)
Profile   Post #: 65
RE: Poachers... - 12/29/2007 5:51:45 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

quote:

He does not want me snarking on doms in email.


I have to ask, why respond at all?  Why not ignore them?  That's what I do and I rarely have issues with people repeatedly begging me for responses.



One liners I do not respond to at all. If they write more than that I send them what I am ordered to send them...period... he tells me to, I submit, pretty easy. Sinergy does not want to cut me off from all contact with other dominants, just ones that do not respect that he is my dom and they should state their business with him... he decides

Edited to add, there is something very squishy and submissive feeling to me that he decides whether or not I get to talk to other dominants... it is one of those things I readily submit control over, possibly because it has that entire feeling of being possessed to it. It is my kink, I enjoy it, and I do not even know why, but for whatever reason I like him controlling that aspect of my internet life... I also get off on being told to "shut up", and he knows that too... I do not know why I like it, but it makes me hot... we all have our quirks


< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 12/29/2007 5:57:17 PM >

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: Poachers... - 12/29/2007 5:56:13 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DiurnalVampire

How did you deal with people like this? Did you direct the mail to your Dominant and let them deal with it? Were you allowed to respond on your own or did they have some say in what you replied back? Did you get nasty, stay polite, block and ignore without a reply?


I snark.

I'm encouraged to snark them, Valyraen reads over my shoulder and we mock them together. If they get too pathetic or nasty (or we simply get bored with them) we dismiss with them a simple "You no longer have permission to speak to me. If you feel have anything worth me reading it, you may to try to convince my owner to reinstate your privileges."

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: Poachers... - 12/29/2007 5:59:35 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

Try getting ones that call your guy a loser and unworthy of you-see how amusing it is then.


Been there, done that, got the t-shirt. I've even got the "He's too young, in a year you'll find out who the dom is when you are holding the leash" one. It's annoying and rude but I still think it's pretty funny.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to Leatherist)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: Poachers... - 12/29/2007 6:03:15 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Emperor1956

Why do I view profiles?   It has absolutely nothing with a desire for the poster, or my status, or any other "motive" ascribed.



Have to agree with that. For the most part, if I've viewed someone's profile it is because either I wanted a better look at their picture because they were wearing something interesting or they made a post that made me want a better idea of they were by reading their profile before responding.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to Emperor1956)
Profile   Post #: 69
RE: Poachers... - 12/29/2007 6:31:43 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

quote:

Five posts on a thread about a subject matter of no importance to you is interesting, too.


I don't want to read through my many long-winded posts on the topic, so maybe you can point out exactly where I said on this thread that the subject matter was of no importantance to me.  I almost always find it interesting to see how people react to things.



Sure, I'll do the work for ya:

Post #16:
"Why be bothered by silly internet behavior?"


Post #30:
"It's silly people on-line.  Is it really that important if they are disrespectful?" 


Post #35:
"I don't get freaked out over what stupid people on-line say to me.  It just isn't important in my life." 


The messages you are posting (and if you would like me to go back and pull them for you I will) are not asking how people react to things, but questioning why, and implying that those who react might somehow have some sort of insecurity issues.  It's a slighted, backhanded criticism. 

Since you don't want to go back and re-read your own posts, in this very post I am quoting, you said you are interested in how, not why, and yet in all your posts, you are questioning why people aren't doing things your way. 

In case you forgot and do not want to reread all the long winded posts, this is what you said about people that respond to the kind of emails the OP spoke of:

"I wonder if there are other things going on if getting these sort of messages are so disturbing.  Perhaps some insecurity about the relationship or fear from outside pressure?  Maybe the reaction to the messages is more important than the messages themselves."

If you think this is not a passive aggressive insult, then we differ in opinions.  I don't normally reply to you, katylied, nor is what you've said here really disturbing to me, but the negativity you tend to post reaches a point every once in awhile that I don't feel like sitting on my hands all the time.

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: Poachers... - 12/29/2007 6:32:49 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

... we all have our quirks



Agreed.  But apparently if our quirks are not someone else's, we must be insecure.  Pffft! 

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: Poachers... - 12/29/2007 6:34:33 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: Emperor1956

Why do I view profiles?   It has absolutely nothing with a desire for the poster, or my status, or any other "motive" ascribed.



Have to agree with that. For the most part, if I've viewed someone's profile it is because either I wanted a better look at their picture because they were wearing something interesting or they made a post that made me want a better idea of they were by reading their profile before responding.


I'll chime in with my agreement here.  I look at profiles because I'm interested (or curious) in what is on them.  I figure people are looking at mine for the same reason.  Desire for the other person has never factored into it.

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: Poachers... - 12/29/2007 7:17:33 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		I cannot answer for katy, and I can see how you may read her posts the way you have, but it is sometimes hard for people to understand why others do things the way that they do them....

I can understand that some people believe because my profile tells doms they should ask Sinergy for permission to converse with me that makes us somehow insecure in the relationship. I had one email that attacked my Daddy that stated such.. and I told Daddy about the email, THAT email did upset me for a nanosecond... until my Daddy laughed at it, genuine mirth filled laughter. He forbade me to contact the jerk back and snark on him. You see that was what the asshole wanted, for me to contact him back. No desire to insult someone is worth being disobedient for....

I have a lot of things I do every day that make me think of being submissive. I have things I have to wear to bed, I have to call him to remind him of his medication, I have research he has ordered of me often, I have to rethink snacks not to include chocolate if I can't contact him by phone. I have an exercise routine that must be carried through the way he has designed it.... etc etc etc... the thing written on my profile is the least of my submission to him, it is there just to make my life easier..

I do not feel it is really necessary to explain this to "defend" our relationship mind you, but just maybe there is someone out there that genuinely wants to understand why people like me have it written that we do not respond to dominant men. My reaction and his reaction to these emails are all about us, katy is right about that one. It is all about OUR dynamic as to  why I respond to those emails the way that I do... just like wearing ankle cuffs to bed is a part of our dynamic, why is one easy to understand, but the other so difficult? He dictates how polite I am in public too, and if I forget to say "please" to someone.. he gets on my ass for that one too... and that is not about the person I forgot to say "please" to, it is about our dynamic too, and how I respresent him as my dominant (I only have forgotten the magic word once...and believe me, he caught that forgetfulness)

Just some more thoughts on the issue... you know, sometimes dominants order us to do things just because they can, other times it is because it is best for the relationship, other times it is because they want something a certain way, and still other times it is for our own good and to take care of us... He knows how I appreciate that I get fewer emails because of him.

< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 12/29/2007 7:19:14 PM >

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: Poachers... - 12/29/2007 7:28:07 PM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

Try getting ones that call your guy a loser and unworthy of you-see how amusing it is then.


Been there, done that, got the t-shirt. I've even got the "He's too young, in a year you'll find out who the dom is when you are holding the leash" one. It's annoying and rude but I still think it's pretty funny.


I had a girl who's standard reply used to be, "If he's such a loser, then why are you trolling ME? He HAS a sub."

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 74
RE: Poachers... - 12/29/2007 7:33:46 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline 		*chuckles* Did anyone ever reply "Because I see the potential in you that no one else can" or some other lame reason?

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to Leatherist)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: Poachers... - 12/29/2007 7:36:05 PM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

*chuckles* Did anyone ever reply "Because I see the potential in you that no one else can" or some other lame reason?


A better one is "Yes, I know that your wife does not understand you. No one else does either."

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 76
RE: Poachers... - 12/29/2007 7:54:35 PM   
greenearth21


Posts: 228
Joined: 7/9/2006
Status: offline 		 

It depends...whenever i have been talking to a dominant that I have a serious interest in or am with, i would share such things openly just like any conversation. some have told me what to do (not respond) while others laugh about it etc.  Either way I respond to the ones I want to...depending on their tone.  I just say thanx but no thanx...some dont deserve acknowledgement and some get the feisty side of me.  I do think its a shame that some are okay with being "rebound"...but i guess atleast they are honest in showing their desperation...gotta give them credit for somethign right?

(in reply to batshalom)
Profile   Post #: 77
RE: Poachers... - 12/29/2007 7:56:47 PM   
catize


Posts: 3020
Joined: 3/7/2006
Status: offline
quote:

*cracks up*   


Heh, heh, glad someone got my little joke!

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"Power is real. But it's a lot less real if it's not perceived as power."
Robert Parker, Stranger in Paradise

(in reply to littlelostbunny)
Profile   Post #: 78
RE: Poachers... - 12/29/2007 8:45:58 PM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

I wonder if there are other things going on if getting these sort of messages are so disturbing.  Perhaps some insecurity about the relationship or fear from outside pressure?  Maybe the reaction to the messages is more important than the messages themselves.

Skipping ahead since I havnt finished reading but dont want to forget to respond to this...
Angel had to sneak around the firewal at school to get on, and doing so and risking major consequences just to hae me badmouthed in every email he recieved (male and female interest) was enough to drive him off the site.

Fox is more along the lines of where Aqua is. I read his messages nad he occasionaly tells me about the ones he gets. If it were a hardship for him to be getting onto the site to check and everything he had was worthless too, Id suggest he leave as well. Fox makes friends and enjoys the forums, which is why he is here. Angel didnt, even when he treid just contact to make friends it evnetually turned into so when are you going to serve me conversations.

I was curious, I am also intereste in how people respond to things, and what sort of respect people get as opposed to what they assume they should get.

Fox got one email, a bit back, where he snarkily informed them he wasnt interested and was collared. The dominant who had tried to proposition him then had the nerve to tell him she was goingto complain to me about his lack of respect! He responded "Please, do".  She never did.

DV


_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 79
RE: Poachers... - 12/29/2007 10:04:55 PM   
petdave


Posts: 2479
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DiurnalVampire

So, my question is... for those of you owned now or who dealt with this when they were if they are not at the moment...

How did you deal with people like this? Did you direct the mail to your Dominant and let them deal with it? Were you allowed to respond on your own or did they have some say in what you replied back? Did you get nasty, stay polite, block and ignore without a reply?


Huh, i didn't think that happened to guys. Being rude is fun, though... always good for a little thrill of victory

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)
Profile   Post #: 80
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