bottoming

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

bottoming

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> bottoming

Page: [1]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

bottoming - 1/3/2008 6:26:30 PM

b4blkm

Posts: 5
Joined: 12/3/2007
Status: offline

i am fairly new at this and wonder what the term "bottoming" means..

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: bottoming - 1/3/2008 6:55:50 PM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

For many of us, it describes a physical role you play in a scene. Some equate this with being submissive, others don't.

Master Fire

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to b4blkm)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: bottoming - 1/3/2008 7:05:42 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

Bottoming is often the "recipient" in a scene. I generally define it as "someone who engages in a specific limited short term authority transfer as the one without authority for the purpose of direct enjoyment"

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: bottoming - 1/3/2008 7:34:07 PM

antipode

Posts: 1787
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bottoming

(in reply to b4blkm)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: bottoming - 1/3/2008 9:48:02 PM

Suleiman

Posts: 1127
Joined: 9/9/2004
Status: offline

First, a basic disclaimer:
There have been many many many (waaaayyyyy to F!ing many) arguments regarding the meaning of words like top, dominant, master/mistress, slave, submissive, bottom, et al, ad nauseum. There is no absolute, hard and fast answer to this question, because there is no monolithic language of BDSM, not a grand high council of kinksters who make the rules and hand them down from on high like Moses in chaps.

Ahem. That being said...
So far as I know, the term "Bottom" is derived from (vanilla) gay culture of the 60s and 70s, referring to someone who was on the bottom - that is to say, someone who was getting fucked, rather than doing the fucking The fucker, of course, wold be a top.). I believe "catcher" is the modern equivalent. In the leather scene of the 70s, bottom became synonmous with submissive, and this particular use of the term has crept into mainstream kinkster terminology. Currently, the typical use of the adjective bottom in a BDSM context is to denote a person who is a sexual submissive in bed, but who does not live the "lifestyle" per se.

_____________________________

Think of my verbosity as a sort of litmus test for our relationship. I write in a manner identical to how I speak and how I think. If you can not cope with what I have written here, it is probably for the best if we go our separate ways.

(in reply to b4blkm)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: bottoming - 1/3/2008 9:59:58 PM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: b4blkm

i am fairly new at this and wonder what the term "bottoming" means..

I define it as "being the bottom in the scene", ie. the one being whipped. For me, it does not imply anything about being dominant, submissive, or otherwise.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to b4blkm)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: bottoming - 1/4/2008 7:57:25 AM

ArgoGeorgia

Posts: 256
Joined: 2/9/2007
From: Atlanta, Georgia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub
I define it as "being the bottom in the scene", ie. the one being whipped. For me, it does not imply anything about being dominant, submissive, or otherwise.

Agreed. Although I'm a Dom, I do occasionally enjoy bottoming in a scene (why should a sub have all the fun? lol). While some may disagree, this definitely does not make me submissive, because I cannot and will not submit For what it's worth, to me submission is more of a mental state of being, while bottoming is playing a role in a scene. Some may call that splitting hairs, others may call me a switch. That's fine, we all have opinions!

_____________________________

Been there, done that, got the t-shirt. No, seriously. They have t-shirts for everything nowadays.

(in reply to AquaticSub)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: bottoming - 1/4/2008 8:04:10 AM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

To me "bottoming" is an action, such as "topping" is... these are not really roles, but the action of being on the receiving end of sadomasocism or bondage.

On the other hand I would describe a "bottom" as someone that enjoys being the recipient in BDSM play. It is mainly a sexual role and there is no authority transfer because a bottom can direct the top in how they want the scene conducted...

Just my view on it

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to b4blkm)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: bottoming - 1/4/2008 5:44:39 PM

b4blkm

Posts: 5
Joined: 12/3/2007
Status: offline

ty i assume in this situation i was directing from the bottom....perhaps thats what my Master meant..i have much to learn..

(in reply to juliaoceania)

Profile

Post #: 9

RE: bottoming - 1/4/2008 7:00:25 PM

daddysliloneds

Posts: 1351
Joined: 6/28/2006
Status: offline

if he told you that you were topping from the bottom, he's implying that you aren't giving over control and/or are directing him as to what is or isn't going to happen instead of complying as if you were in a submissive state of mind.

quote:

ORIGINAL: b4blkm

ty i assume in this situation i was directing from the bottom....perhaps thats what my Master meant..i have much to learn..

(in reply to b4blkm)

Profile

Post #: 10

RE: bottoming - 1/4/2008 7:13:07 PM

b4blkm

Posts: 5
Joined: 12/3/2007
Status: offline

ty i get it ...now.

(in reply to daddysliloneds)

Profile

Post #: 11