The New Wave?????

The New Wave????? (Full Version)

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MoodDomme -> The New Wave????? (1/8/2008 9:42:53 AM)
It looks like we have reached a New era in the LifeStyle. I have Encountered as of late.What I Deem as "subtrollers" this is a sub.That is neither Domme or sub. They justwant to Tell you what they want and whatyou Will do. I Believe they stems from the "X" and "Y" Gen. What a TOTAL Concept of Nothing but BS Unadultated type. Mood Domme

MissHarlet -> RE: The New Wave????? (1/8/2008 9:43:55 AM)
I call them Burger King subs .. they want it "their way "

TallDarkAndWitty -> RE: The New Wave????? (1/8/2008 9:45:00 AM)
Ummm...if they are new to you, you must be pretty new yourself. People who like kinky sex have been around a long, long time... Taggard

RCdc -> RE: The New Wave????? (1/8/2008 9:49:55 AM)
Yeah - so. Whatcha gonna do. the.dark.

Mercnbeth -> RE: The New Wave????? (1/8/2008 10:01:52 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MoodDomme It looks like we have reached a New era in the LifeStyle. I have Encountered as of late.What I Deem as "subtrollers" this is a sub.That is neither Domme or sub. They justwant to Tell you what they want and whatyou Will do. I Believe they stems from the "X" and "Y" Gen. What a TOTAL Concept of Nothing but BS Unadultated type. Mood Domme M. D., "subtrollers" is an interesting reference. beth and I have been discussing the same issue and we'd agree that it is becoming more common. I have my own reference for solicitors of our services under the same conditions. I use the acronym 'SIC' - 'Submissive In charge'. We refer them to their counterpart; a 'DIS', a 'Dominant In Service'. As 'Seinfeld' would say; "...not that there is anything wrong with that!". The interesting thing is observing the reaction of the solicitor when you point it out to them. As if their own desires and position reflected back at them as a pragmatic consequence somehow becomes offensive when echoed. It's not even a minor nuisance. In fact it's good to see people ask for, or in some cases demand, to be serviced. It is honest and, as such, fundamental to forming a relationship. Self delusion is another subject, but again the catch all phrase of basic contract law comes into play; "as agreed to by the parties". We can choose to participate or not in the activity; but we have no grounds to apply judgment.

gorgeous1 -> RE: The New Wave????? (1/8/2008 10:32:07 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MoodDomme It looks like we have reached a New era in the LifeStyle. I have Encountered as of late.What I Deem as "subtrollers" this is a sub.That is neither Domme or sub. They justwant to Tell you what they want and whatyou Will do. I Believe they stems from the "X" and "Y" Gen. What a TOTAL Concept of Nothing but BS Unadultated type. Mood Domme Mood Domme, perhaps I can help you with your dilemma. I am a submissive. I TELL my Dominant what I want. Is that being pushy, or wanting it my way? Absolutely not. To have a successful and thriving D/s dynamic requires active participation from both parties. I have learned this valuable lesson just recently. I've been married/playing with my Master for over 10 years now, and only recently did I discover that sharing my fantasies and desires helps us both explore new and exciting things to experience. Let's get down to brass tacks here: we all want what we want and I don't see how a submissive could truly enjoy submitting to something they really don't want. This is a game, folks. Find players that want to play your game. If not, find a doormat to wipe your boots on. With that said, I read your profile, and you aren't very specific in what sort of game you want to play. Many of the profiles on this site are well written. They are explicit in what it is that they want, be it enemas, groveling, objectification, "rape" play, etc., and your profile only speaks of some vague ideal of wanting someone who is "in real need to be taught the True Meaning of their Interfelt desires, and needs." By being vague, you force those submissives seeking a Dominant to TELL you what they want and see if you respond. If your idea of teaching "true meaning" to a submissive is having them lick your boots while you administer a wicked caning, then SAY IT. You then increase your chances of finding the sub who is into playing your game. It might decrease the quantity of responses you get, but hopefully it will increase your chances of finding the perfect player. I just don't see how being a vague Dominant gives anyone the right to chastise a submissive who tries to read your mind.

CalifChick -> RE: The New Wave????? (1/8/2008 10:38:34 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth We can choose to participate or not in the activity; *but we have no grounds to apply judgment*. Awww, Merc, don't be a doodyhead. Now you're trying to take all our fun away. Pfffffttttttttttttttt. Cali

Amaros -> RE: The New Wave????? (1/8/2008 10:58:39 AM)
I'm in agreement with Mercnbeth, much of it likely stems from simple basic caution, nothing wrong with that, there are no doubt many "Doms" with hidden agendas who haunt the lists as well - for those not initiated by fire, so to speak, WIIWD typically starts as vague, unformed longings, unspoken fantasies - some like to dive right in and devil take the hindmost, others want to get their toes wet first. It's been a very healthy community so far, everyone I've interacted with seems to be what they say they are, whatever that happens to be, but there are no doubt also "outers" and self appointed "reformers" lurking here and there, and if not, it's just a matter of time - there are such on Literotica for example.

MadRabbit -> RE: The New Wave????? (1/8/2008 11:04:28 AM)
I wasn't aware that greedy bottoms were a new phenomena. Don't old people have better things to do than vent their frustrations over people acting in ways they don't approve by blaming it on my generation with some completely non-existent connection?

Mercnbeth -> RE: The New Wave????? (1/8/2008 11:22:48 AM)
quote: I wasn't aware that greedy bottoms were a new phenomena. I don't see it as a "new phenomena", nor is it "generational" or age related. It's access and availability. What better way for someone to get laid than to have a pool of people who identify as "submissive"? Is it any wonder that the more naive would send a first message; "Bend over and assume the position!" seeing such a representation? Conversely its no wonder why the submissive side needs and seeks 'protection', and sets up so many defensive and limiting barriers? As a statistical percentage, there are no more and no less seeking and no difference in what they are seeking. There are just MORE in number seeking in a public pool for all to observe. Some even know what it is they are looking for; in practice and in principle. Age - is not a determining factor to consider. Whether sitting on a sofa at Hellfire in NYC 20+ years ago or having a open tab on my computer screen at my office what I've seen passing by hasn't changed. Its similar to looking out of your window counting the colors of cars passing. Depending your vantage point, there may be more or less passing by, but the percentages don't change and aren't a function of the model year. White will be the color most often observed. Here - its called vanilla.

Nosathro -> RE: The New Wave????? (1/8/2008 11:43:02 AM)
Tal and greetings Yes I to have notice this wave. They claim their are subs; they want; they come on here and complain about getting so many responses but nothing they want or rather no one who will let them top from the bottom. I wish you well Nosathro

sweetwenchie -> RE: The New Wave????? (1/8/2008 11:47:36 AM)
i wouldn't say this is something new. There have always been the "do me" type of submissives (bottoms)... and Dominants for that matter. ~shrug~ Maybe they just like the kinky sex aspect, or the pain aspect, but do not have the inclination or desire for anything other than that. To each their own i think. ~~edited because i like playing with myself~~ [;)]

LadyLolly -> RE: The New Wave????? (1/8/2008 11:52:16 AM)
Perhaps the problem is in bottoms calling themselves submissives or slaves. Bottoms and Tops get together and negotiate the "stuff" they each want and are willing to do. Domiants and submissives define the extent and parameters of thier interaction, the extent of dominion the Dominant is given. Yes, it is all about communication and to some extent negotiation. Yes, it is all about connecting with others, our yin and yang. But it helps if the communication is honest and succinct. With all due respect to one who posted that this is only a game and cannot understand why one would want to do anything they didn't want to do A). for some this is an alternative lifestyle - not just a game. B.) If one only does what one wants to do anyway - just where is the submission in that? Common usage of accept terms and meanings is extremely helpful if real communication is to take place. If I tried to give someone directions and told them to take a left instead of a right chances are they aren't going to arrive where expected. While the origional person posting perhaps could be more explicit in what she wants and does not want - it's been my experience more than often enough it's not going to help much. The do-mes don't seem to exert themselves reading over much. Just goes with the territory, so no sense getting bent out of shape about it. If they are rude just delete and block or if you happen to be of a sadistic nature, jerking thier chain would seem to be within the bounds of fair play and affords a little pleasure from an unpleasant experience <G>. Otherwise a polite no thanks should suffice. There is no end to the discussion generated by the terms slave and sub........Wouldn't it be nice if there was a "Websters" of BDSM terms for reference? Perhaps some aspiring writer out there will take the task on some day and we can all say what we mean and have what we say clearly understood. I agree fully with you both that there is nothing wrong under the sun between consenting adults, no place to judge, there are many points of view, needs, desires and different places where we as people and individuals are coming from. None of which is the only right or correct way - we can only be right with ourselves and do our honest best to be right with others. Often that includes agreeing to politely disagree. Having read several of your posts, the voice of reason is appreciated - thanks for sharing.

TallDarkAndWitty -> RE: The New Wave????? (1/8/2008 12:02:18 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sweetwenchie ~~edited because i like playing with myself~~ [;)] Cool...can I watch? smile

scottjk -> RE: The New Wave????? (1/8/2008 12:04:28 PM)
quote: As 'Seinfeld' would say; "...not that there is anything wrong with that!". The interesting thing is observing the reaction of the solicitor when you point it out to them. As if their own desires and position reflected back at them as a pragmatic consequence somehow becomes offensive when echoed. I don't have a problem with it either. HOWEVER, discovering this particular desire late in the game sucks. It's not 'put out there', like many other things are. As a result, it's viewed as dishonest and manipulative when it's discovered. Meh. I suppose it requires a something else to think about when you meet some one. Add it to the list of questions regarding orientation.

sweetwenchie -> RE: The New Wave????? (1/8/2008 12:09:25 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: TallDarkAndWitty quote: ORIGINAL: sweetwenchie ~~edited because i like playing with myself~~ [;)] Cool...can I watch? smile Certainly! ~type type type type type... backstroke... type type type~ [:D]

TallDarkAndWitty -> RE: The New Wave????? (1/8/2008 12:18:33 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sweetwenchie Certainly! ~type type type type type... backstroke... type type type~ [:D] Oh baby! fap fap fap

vtviceversa -> RE: The New Wave????? (1/8/2008 12:20:53 PM)
Ah, "Burger King Subs" - wonderful phrase! Not sure how many here are really "old timers" per se (and I ain't neccessarily talking age ya know...), but back in the days... You might find this an interesting read sometime. Used to be that places like alt.sex.bondage were the online "scene". Ms. Reid's work still holds good credence in a number of circles: http://www.irchelp.org/irchelp/misc/electropolis.html

ArgoGeorgia -> RE: The New Wave????? (1/8/2008 12:21:53 PM)
To me it almost feels like the desired interaction has become a commodity to be traded, bought, sold, etc. More than likely this is because of the blessing and curse of the internet. It opens up the entire world of possibilities and can put you in touch with many, many potential play partners. When a person is out for a quick fix of a little slap and tickle, they are going to say exactly what, when, and how they want it. It is a physical commodity, pure and simple. If one person does not meet their demands, click "Next Profile" and move on. A D/s relationship, on the other hand, takes work, commitment, and a deeper understanding of WIITWD. Something that science and the internet have not yet found a way to supersize, commodotize, and grant instant gratification. edited because I forgot something

TallDarkAndWitty -> RE: The New Wave????? (1/8/2008 12:25:05 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ArgoGeorgia A D/s relationship, on the other hand, takes work, commitment, and a deeper understanding of WIITWD. Bullshit. Lot's of D/s relationships are based on nothing more than "just a little slap and tickle." Some are deep, some are shallow. Maybe your relationships are deep, but not all are, nor does everyone want a deep relationship. Taggard

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