Forced submission

Forced submission (Full Version)

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ferriemistie -> Forced submission (1/17/2008 5:17:27 PM)
Over the past few days i've been thinking about how i was introduced into the lifestyle and my first Dom (guess it's since W/we are finalizing O/our divorce this month) my first Dom forced me to be His slave after W/we got married and to begin with i resisted. After a couple severe punishments i gave in a was a "good girl".. Once i accepted my role i came to realize that i love submitting to Someone and the feeling i got making Someone happy is wonderful. Now when i'm not serving Someone i feel empty and without meaning (so to speak) Has anyone else been forced into submission just to find out that they enjoy it?

MamaDomme1 -> RE: Forced submission (1/17/2008 5:25:25 PM)
Just a thought-- if it is forced, then it is abuse and not submission. I prefer not 'forcing' anything, but would rather coax it along ;)

totalsubm55 -> RE: Forced submission (1/17/2008 5:30:19 PM)
If it's truly forced, it's not submission but I think lots of us have a fantasy of forced servitude sometimes. I do.

ferriemistie -> RE: Forced submission (1/17/2008 5:33:01 PM)
To begin with He forced me but then i willingly submitted to Him.. (at first it was to just stop the "beatings" but then i actually enjoyed doing it.) Does that make sense

Honsoku -> RE: Forced submission (1/17/2008 5:33:58 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MamaDomme1 Just a thought-- if it is forced, then it is abuse and not submission. I prefer not 'forcing' anything, but would rather coax it along ;) If it isn't forced (at some point), it is obedience, not submission. Force does not equal abuse.

totalsubm55 -> RE: Forced submission (1/17/2008 5:34:33 PM)
it does make sense

MadRabbit -> RE: Forced submission (1/17/2008 5:42:18 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: totalsubm55 If it's truly forced, it's not submission but I think lots of us have a fantasy of forced servitude sometimes. I do. I have noticed quite a few submissives do and if they could manage to forget about them except for fantasy play time, they can start to learn what it takes to make a healthy power based relationship work.

SubbieOnWheels -> RE: Forced submission (1/17/2008 5:51:30 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ferriemistie Has anyone else been forced into submission just to find out that they enjoy it? I wasn't exactly forced into it, but I found myself in submission almost without realizing what was happening. The play got out of hand because my b/f at the time didn't know what he was doing (got his info from Hustler magazine). I was traumatized, and it contributed to a lot of problems, including guilty feelings about enjoying what I thought was essentially abuse. Bethical

BoundDown -> RE: Forced submission (1/17/2008 5:53:22 PM)
I was coaxed along forcefully; I can not say against my will be cause I agreed to it before hand and while I did not want it at the time I had already acknowledged that it was going to have to be done that way. I had alot of social conditioning to over come, and alot of baggage that could only be checked in such a manner. I'm better now. Was it the most "healthy" approach: probably not, but truthfully I wasn't what you could call healthy at the time either. Rest assured ferriemist; you are not alone.

txnights05 -> RE: Forced submission (1/17/2008 8:51:43 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Honsoku If it isn't forced (at some point), it is obedience, not submission. Force does not equal abuse. I have thought a lot about this recently. I agree with Honsoku in that i need there to be some force of some kind or i don't know if i am submitting or just going along obediently. It is an evolving of thought for me and an understanding of my own submission. For me i need to know that whoever is dominating me is in fact in control. When i finally submit i need to know that He won the war.. so to speak. I need to know without a doubt that He is in control and i am not. For that to happen i need there to be some kind of power struggle which He wins and not because i just give in. I need to know that He is more dominant than i am. My submission needs to be taken, if it can, otherwise i will always feel like i have an upper hand in some way.

CalifChick -> RE: Forced submission (1/17/2008 9:10:27 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Honsoku If it isn't forced (at some point), it is obedience, not submission. Force does not equal abuse. I disagree. I don't have to be forced into anything to be submissive. Obedience refers to actions. Submissive is to yield to authority. One is physical, one is mental. YMMV. Cali

SimplyMichael -> RE: Forced submission (1/17/2008 9:29:57 PM)
Any coward can beat a woman into submission, to truly tame a woman requires far more.

KnOcala -> RE: Forced submission (1/17/2008 9:43:14 PM)
I believe submission is a gift of ones own free will. Anything else is abuse. You don't beat any creature into submission. Only a coward would beat another into submission.

BossyShoeBitch -> RE: Forced submission (1/17/2008 9:46:36 PM)
There is not a man alive who can truly force me to do/act anything that I don't want to do.

SubmissiveAK -> RE: Forced submission (1/17/2008 9:48:55 PM)
I was introduced to D/s in a rather odd way. I "asked" a hypnodomme to show me what it was like to be submissive... to show me my submissive side. She proceeded to attempt to force me into becoming a slave. She was very good at what is called stealth trancing, and NLP. I was a brat then and caused a lot of problems... ultimately I left her, but now I do feel the desire for a 24/7 total power exchange in my life. Did she do this? Was there just an aspect of my inner self that she brought out? I will never know. I'm not sure I want to know. Its a little erotic to think about. I guess gave my consent, but I did not totally understand what would happen. There were many times I was forced by her stern control. Do I regret meeting her, or what I've become? No. In fact I miss her and the amount of control she held over me. I think ultimately it was good for me, but I acknowledge that now I have a need for someone like her, and that troubles me. ~submissiveAK~

txnights05 -> RE: Forced submission (1/17/2008 9:57:01 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael Any coward can beat a woman into submission, to truly tame a woman requires far more. exactly.... "Tame" being the operative word.... sums up what i was trying to say.

slavegirljoy -> RE: Forced submission (1/17/2008 10:04:19 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ferriemistie Has anyone else been forced into submission just to find out that they enjoy it? i was taken, not forced, into submission and i went gladly and without resistance. Beating someone into submission isn't what i consider to be a healthy D/s relationship. joy Owned property of Master David

BossyShoeBitch -> RE: Forced submission (1/17/2008 10:05:46 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SubmissiveAK I was introduced to D/s in a rather odd way. I "asked" a hypnodomme to show me what it was like to be submissive... to show me my submissive side. She proceeded to attempt to force me into becoming a slave. She was very good at what is called stealth trancing, and NLP. I was a brat then and caused a lot of problems... ultimately I left her, but now I do feel the desire for a 24/7 total power exchange in my life. Did she do this? Was there just an aspect of my inner self that she brought out? I will never know. I'm not sure I want to know. Its a little erotic to think about. I guess gave my consent, but I did not totally understand what would happen. There were many times I was forced by her stern control. Do I regret meeting her, or what I've become? No. In fact I miss her and the amount of control she held over me. I think ultimately it was good for me, but I acknowledge that now I have a need for someone like her, and that troubles me. ~submissiveAK~ OK. could you explain what stealth trancing and NLP is?

ferriemistie -> RE: Forced submission (1/17/2008 10:34:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: slavegirljoy quote: ORIGINAL: ferriemistie Has anyone else been forced into submission just to find out that they enjoy it? i was taken, not forced, into submission and i went gladly and without resistance. Beating someone into submission isn't what i consider to be a healthy D/s relationship. joy Owned property of Master David That is exactly why i left Him almost 5 years ago and am getting a divorce from Him (it's taken so long cause He's contested it the whole time til now)

Honsoku -> RE: Forced submission (1/17/2008 10:51:55 PM)
Force does not necessarily mean physical force, that is only one kind of force (people frequently make the erroneous assumption that force = physical). I said absolutely nothing about beating anyone into submission. Bottom line is that domination requires some form of influence; you can either manipulate someone into wanting to do what you want, or you can "make" them do it. I use "make" in quotations because it is nearly impossible to physically force someone to take an action. Domination always comes down to a contest of wills (unless one side pleads nolo contendere). quote: ORIGINAL CalifChick I disagree. I don't have to be forced into anything to be submissive. Obedience refers to actions. Submissive is to yield to authority. One is physical, one is mental. YMMV. How can you separate those two? How can you be obedient without being submissive, or visa-versa? Using that definition, one cannot exist without the other. If the authority is not exerted, there isn't anything to submit to. That exertion of authority is a kind of force (there has to be force of some type, in order for you to yield to it). The question to consider is; what supports that authority? Really, we need a third term because obedience and submission overlap. All submission requires obedience, but not all obedience requires submission.

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