RE: How to increase my pain tolerance?

RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion

Message

slavegirljoy -> RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (1/21/2008 6:36:52 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: AbsitInvidia For example if he wants to cane me and I'm screaming my head off after stroke one, he won't really be able to continue since we have neighbors who can hear. And even if I'm gagged which we've tried, it's still unbearable pain and I can make quite a bit of noise through the gag...it's instinctual. When my Master and i lived in an apartment, He often said to me, "When the cops knock on the door, you get to explain it to them." [;)] Of course, the cops never did knock on the door but, i have always been very noisy and vocal, whether having an orgasm or being struck with a quirt in my most tender spots. i not only scream but also thrash about and pound my fists. All of which makes my Master laugh out loud. quote: I know what you mean that he wouldn't enjoy it if it didn't hurt at all, but as it is now it hurts so much that it limits what he's able to do. If he wants to cane me he doesn't want to do three half swats with less momentum than he'd use on a fly swatter. He's already told me that even though it hurts me, it's still unsatisfying if he doesn't get to put any force or effort into it. With my Master, it's not how much force He uses, it's how much *reaction* He gets out of me, that's important. Many times, the smallest pinch, which is nearly effortless, causes me to scream and squirm in pain and He loves it. Pinching me is something that He especially enjoys doing when He and i are in the car. i don't usually get out of a car ride with Him without some new bruises from Him pinching me. A quirt, in fact, doesn't require a heavy hand to cause a lot of pain, especially in sensitive areas. my Master doesn't have to 'break a sweat' or 'pound the crap' out of me for Him to get the satisfaction He's looking for in causing me pain. Just knowing that He is getting that result from whatever He chooses to do, even if it's by pulling a single strand of hair from the back of my neck, satisfies His sadism. quote: But how do you suggest that I change my perception of feeling pain? It hurts. I don't get those endorphins that masochists must get for it to feel good. I feel agony and want it to stop. Is there any way to make something that hurts feel good? One of the biggest misconceptions is that masochists, which i am, don't feel any pain or, that we laugh in the face of pain. Pain doesn't "feel good" to me. Pain HURTS. It's supposed to hurt. The endorphins do get released but, not before the brain registers the fact that i am in pain. That's not to say that there aren't some who don't feel any pain but, i would be very worried, if i didn't feel pain, since that's the body's warning system that something is wrong. As a masochist, though, i enjoy feeling the pain. The difference with me, as a masochist, from someone who isn't a masochist, isn't that the pain is painless, for me, it's that i look forward to feeling the sting, the burn, the discomfort, the ouch. How i process the pain is by knowing that it's being caused on purpose, in a controlled manner by someone i know and respect and trust, for the sexual excitement it causes, that allows me to override my body's natural reaction to pain and, stay there and take it and suffer and feel wonderful relief when it's over and, then want more when it's done. joy Owned servant of Master David

LadyHugs -> RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (1/21/2008 7:40:08 AM)
Dear AbsitInvidia, Ladies and Gentlemen; As a Sadist, I can say with confidence that it is no fun for me when the person recieving my talents are not having fun but, since I enjoy sensual as well--I find my joy regardless. There are several things to which a slave/submissive/masochist/bottom may do in order to help manipulate the pain by putting their body into position where it can be affective to do so. Illustrated positions and an article at: www.CANES-IAC.com has my article on caning and how positions play a key part in helping take on 'impact.' I will also mention, as a Sadist; it is my point of view that anybody can 'beat' someone or 'whip someone painfully' however, a Sadist to me, is a person who enjoys inflicting pain BUT, in an artful manner as to regulate and manipulate pain as well. Pain associated with hurting someone to a point of injury, is not my personal desire. Pain associated with well placed aim to the nerve bundles located on the body is my personal desire. I tap into a masochist's electrical system if you will. From localized pain to wave of radiating pain, burning sensations and or sensation of peeled off/skinning skin and all the sensations in between --doesn't require injury, just well placed strokes and the proper measure of force behind it; from taps to full energy impact with follow through. The position though, as well as doing my part as to set you into it is extremely important. Having shoulders back and collapse the spine down and allowing the 'meat' of the shoulders take impact as well as parting thighs and allowing the genital cavities to open will help the ability to take more impact. Just some thoughts. Respectfully submitted for consideration, Lady Hugs

DesFIP -> RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (1/21/2008 8:03:09 AM)
When he calls you a wuss, does that make you hot or does it make you want to protect yourself from him even more? Because it's hard to accept pain to begin with, but when you are already feeling that he is an unsafe person even if just emotionally, it's going to be damn near impossible to get in a mindset where you can take more. If I were you I would ask him why he chose you in the first place when he already knew you weren't a pain slut. I'd ask myself why I want to be with someone who didn't like the person I am, and only degrades me for not being someone totally different. You don't deserve to be called names and hurt emotionally for being the same person you were when you met, the same person whom he first proclaimed to be a perfect fit.

knotslandingdom -> RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (1/21/2008 8:10:38 AM)
Very nicely put, LadyHugs, but the link doesn't work. Is there another place to see the article you're referring too? quote: ORIGINAL: LadyHugs Illustrated positions and an article at: www.CANES-IAC.com has my article on caning and how positions play a key part in helping take on 'impact.'

StrictMaster979 -> RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (1/21/2008 8:42:21 AM)
I can only speak of the subs reaction, but a favorite dildo allows almost insurmountable pain from a bullwhip, another says the promise of a blow job afterwards- allows a caning to continue, the promise of not executing a favorite tease of mine (clamps on the clit.aligators on the lips) allows a complete coverage of the breasts in clothespins, of lying face down with clothespin covered breasts forced downward-is allowed when sucking is allowed by the sub.

slavegirljoy -> RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (1/21/2008 8:45:01 AM)
i found the article, i think. If it's Caning & Rods - Art of Caning, Reprinted with permission, courtesy Lady Hugs, then it's at, http://www.iron-rose.com/IR/docs/caningart.htm. Another article about caning that i think is good is, Sensuous Caning by Conrad Hodson at, http://www.albanypowerexchange.com/BDSMinfo/more_caning.htm. i like what DesFIP said, too, "Because it's hard to accept pain to begin with, but when you are already feeling that he is an unsafe person even if just emotionally, it's going to be damn near impossible to get in a mindset where you can take more." i think that's very important. Feeling any apprehension about the person who is going to be inflicting pain on you is, in my view, likely to make you tense up before he even begins. Also, i saw this quote and i thought it was appropriate, even though we aren't talking about 'battle', here. "If you are going to win any battle, you have to do one thing. You have to make the mind run the body. Never let the body tell the mind what to do...." -General George S. Patton You can easily 'psyche yourself out' of just about anything or, on the other hand, you can 'psyche yourself up', too. You decide how you are going to look at it, as either something "bad" or "harmful" or something "good", "exciting", "beneficial" and, take it from there. joy Owned servant of Master David

MistressVnus -> RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (1/21/2008 11:14:28 AM)
quote: When he calls you a wuss, does that make you hot or does it make you want to protect yourself from him even more? Because it's hard to accept pain to begin with, but when you are already feeling that he is an unsafe person even if just emotionally, it's going to be damn near impossible to get in a mindset where you can take more. Ditto, ditto, ditto. And, ditto.

LAMaster1964 -> RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (1/21/2008 11:31:33 AM)
He should be careful what he asks for. Personally, if given a choice, I would choose a sub with a low pain threshold because it takes less effort to reach their limit and you have lots of room to work upward. I get my satisfaction from the persons reaction to pain, not some measurement or comparison of how hard I'm hitting. I have has subs with exceptionally high tolerances for pain and it could be hard to inflict their pain limit without permanent damage or scarring. It was always challenging and somewhat exhausting to stay on that fine line of pain limit without overdoing it. With that being said, if he is pleased by the marks he leaves and you can't tolerate that amount of pain, he should rspect that and not call you names. Like someone else said, maybe you are not the right person for him.

bozeman20 -> RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (1/21/2008 12:01:32 PM)
Take a Lamaze class. The meditation and breathing are designed to minimize fear and pain during childbirth, but I have found it helps me in any stressful situation including bdsm. I can only speak for myself, but I have found that if I can remain calm before being subjected to pain my tolerance is greatly increased. Fear and anticipation will greatly increase the amount of pain you feel.

AbsitInvidia -> RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (1/21/2008 3:37:02 PM)
Well he did know at the beginning that I'm not a masochist...the problem was that when we met I was in the States and he was here in Australia so when I flew out here it was the first time we could test just how much pain I could take vs. how much he liked to give. And I don't like being called a wuss but I know he's just saying it in a teasing way, not to be mean. Same as how I say "I hate you" when he does sadistic things...it has a slight reflection of reality but isn't a genuine expression of feeling. That being said though, I don't think there's such thing as a fairytale relationship where every little thing fits like a jigsaw. There's things that I would change about myself, there's things he would change about me, there's things I would change about him, and I would assume there's things he would change about himself. I love him though, and if putting up with a bit of pain every now and then makes him happy I'll be happy to do it. Just not the cane. I hate that stupid cane. I'm going to strongly suggest he use it for serious punishments...like if I snatched his bank card and went on a shopping spree. Then the cane would be appropriate [8D] These are all excellent ideas though...and actually when he is hurting me he always tells me to breathe, and will pause so I can take deep breaths in the middle of it. I told him about the vibrator idea and he thinks it definitely has merit...now the trick is convincing him that if we're going to buy one we might as well make it a hitachi magic wand so that he can use it to make me come as well ;)

LadyHugs -> RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (1/21/2008 8:50:16 PM)
Dear knotslandingdom, Ladies and Gentlemen; Slavegirljoy has placed the non-illustrated version of what was on www.CANE-IAC.com. I went to the site and indeed its not coming up by a general search-- oh dear. Thank you for letting us know its not showing. When I 'Google' Lady Hugs Caning the sites do come up. www.iron-rose.com/IR/docs/caningart.htm www.iron-rose.com/IR/library.htm www.leathernroses.com/generalbdsm/general www.cane-iac.com/items/our-cases/scab-detail.htm (Which comes up via Google and click on the headline part and it came up to the home page and the article is showing properly) Respectfully submitted for consideration, Lady Hugs

laurell3 -> RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (1/21/2008 9:54:47 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LAMaster1964 He should be careful what he asks for. Personally, if given a choice, I would choose a sub with a low pain threshold because it takes less effort to reach their limit and you have lots of room to work upward. I get my satisfaction from the persons reaction to pain, not some measurement or comparison of how hard I'm hitting. I have has subs with exceptionally high tolerances for pain and it could be hard to inflict their pain limit without permanent damage or scarring. It was always challenging and somewhat exhausting to stay on that fine line of pain limit without overdoing it. With that being said, if he is pleased by the marks he leaves and you can't tolerate that amount of pain, he should rspect that and not call you names. Like someone else said, maybe you are not the right person for him. I think they have already decided they are right for each other and have been developing this relationship for quite some time. From what I have seen of both of them, they are pretty good for each other. The rest of your thread however is a great point. Sometimes we wish for something without really knowing the other side may have bigger drawbacks. If I could reduce my pain tolerance again, I probably would. Not only the issue of increasing the amount of stimulation without permanent marking, but there are not nearly as many D types out there that I have found that are willing to go that far.

AbsitInvidia -> RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (1/22/2008 2:23:56 AM)
SixFoot here, I've followed the discussion with great interest, and there are a number of good points taken under consideration. I'd like to offer further clarification from my point of view, or my reality if you prefer. First, dispense with the 'wuss' thing, it's a gentle gibe and is taken and given in a honest and openly teasing manner. There is no harm in it, and none take. How to explain - for me, my sadism has different levels, it's not simply one thing. I enjoy the humiliation and the helplessness, I enjoy the reaction to pain and sensation, I enjoy the sounds both hers and those of the implements I use. I enjoy the implements themselves, their shape and texture, the way they flex or do not flex. I growl, I snarl, I bite. I enjoy it all. When I am in the zone, so to speak, I am literally scintilating inside with energy - energy that needs to be expressed. It's not overstating it to say that if I yielded my self control to that beast it would reduce her to a quivering lump of non-sensical flesh. I am, however, perfectly capable of restraint - I have never and will never give her more than she could handle (though more than she desires is likely on the cards), and I do understand the distinction between the two. I thrill to it, it is her desire to give me that thrill. I don't punish with the tools of my pleasure - and harsh look and the expression of disappointment are more than sufficient in those regards.

MistressVnus -> RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (1/22/2008 3:27:31 AM)
quote: First, dispense with the 'wuss' thing, it's a gentle gibe and is taken and given in a honest and openly teasing manner. There is no harm in it, and none take. Thank you for clarifying that. I was hoping that was the case, however, it wasn't really expressed that way in the OP and I think we were all just concerned that it was being done in a disdainful manner. With that said, I'm sure you can understand our responses of concern and I know that I, meant no harm in expressing my concern about it.

DesFIP -> RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (1/22/2008 5:02:51 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: AbsitInvidia SixFoot here, First, dispense with the 'wuss' thing, it's a gentle gibe and is taken and given in a honest and openly teasing manner. There is no harm in it, and none take. If you read her post, it seems obvious that there is harm taken or she wouldn't have specifically quoted you on it. She's telling you it's okay, but her reactions to it are otherwise. And that's a typically submissive thing to do, to not complain until it's hit too much.

crouchingtigress -> RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (1/22/2008 5:42:39 AM)
breath is the door way to transcendence...focus on your breathing to the exclusion of all else....notice the breath....breath in.....breath out....hold....breathe in....breathe out ....hold....through this exercise you begin to practice self mastery. and with that come revelations: pain is only sensation. pain is only ever tempature and pressure pain is a doorway to a softer calmer place pain is a warning siren that can be turned down or off pain is a wonderful place to begin a journey of souls. you both are young, so may not yet have had the experience of sadism and massochism as a dance of intimacy...he seems to love you very much and you him but i dont feel as though you have really connected sou to soul in this dance. sadism can be a tool of intimacy, sure there is a style of play where he is the administrator of the pain and you are the receiver, but to me that leaves me flat try this: have him put you kneel before him both on the floor look deeply into his eyes he puts his hand on your heart, you put you hand on his you hold it there...connecting..... tears well up in one or both as you feel the deep journey you are about to begin together he anoints you with oils or pee or precum on your forehead and says "mine" he then asks "are you willing?" you answer...you both breathe he says, will you open your heart to me me girl? you answer....you breathe he bores his eyes into you... you start to swoon you feel flush and warm...yet strangly grounded he leads you to where you are to begin your journey he tenderly fastens your restraints he makes sure you are hydrated and warm he starts slowly...letting his voice pour like warm honey in your ear "stay still pet' he strikes you, then caresses that tender place....the pain neutralized by tender touch two sensations singing in your flesh...confusing...keeping yo off balance he tells you of his affection for you he makes you feel safe and deeply proud you want t do anything for him... no longer is it a battle of wills...not longer are you white knuckling the pain..... you have chosen to surrender... you have chosen to serve... your journey begins....

RipTyed -> RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (1/22/2008 6:09:15 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP And that's a typically submissive thing to do, to not complain until it's hit too much. I have found that to be common. A = respect - timely assertion - compliance - balance = unity.

Bamslilgirl -> RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (1/22/2008 1:38:46 PM)
I agree with the subspace thing. When Bam is inflicting pain on me, whether it be spanking, biting, hair pulling, whatever.....I find myself going over into a type of "zone", where the pain turns to power in a way. it's pure pleasure to me at that point. Have you ever been in that "zone"?

SixFootMaster -> RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (1/22/2008 7:35:46 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP quote: ORIGINAL: AbsitInvidia SixFoot here, First, dispense with the 'wuss' thing, it's a gentle gibe and is taken and given in a honest and openly teasing manner. There is no harm in it, and none take. If you read her post, it seems obvious that there is harm taken or she wouldn't have specifically quoted you on it. She's telling you it's okay, but her reactions to it are otherwise. And that's a typically submissive thing to do, to not complain until it's hit too much. I've read her post. I've spoken to her face to face. I've seen her reaction first hand, watched her eyes, her mouth, her body posture in that moment, and in the moments following. I'm also exactly aware of the tone I use, and my own expression and body language. It might help you to know that it's a gentle acknowledgement that I am aware that what I am doing is hurting her, but then you would have to be here and see/hear it to understand really.

ChainedExistence -> RE: How to increase my pain tolerance? (1/22/2008 10:24:31 PM)
People process pain differently...so you don't sit there with a big ole goofy grin on your face loving every second of it? Not to worry...many don't. But what you do learn is how to process it better for yourself. I find it helps me to concentrate on certain visual images, to concentrate on patterns of sounds, to let the pain move through me. There are days when I handle it better than others, and there are moments of bliss when I am asking for another fall of the cane, but most of the time I am simply working my way through moment by moment. The thing that makes it good for me is to know that my "suffering" pleases him, that it isn't causing me any permanent damage, and that I will come out on the other side stronger for having been through it.

Page: << < prev 1 [2] 3 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.0625