RE: Please Be Honest With Me

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: Please Be Honest With Me

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Off the Grid >> RE: Please Be Honest With Me

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Please Be Honest With Me - 1/27/2008 5:36:34 PM

SubbieOnWheels

Posts: 590
Joined: 12/14/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Bound2One

quote:

i've had some extreme disagreements (well in reality i don't know how extreme they really were) and some *IMO* truly stupid responses made to things i've said (see that IMO? it's just my opinion) and i've just been flat out ignored. but i just keep posting. eventually someone somewhere will like what i say. i hope...lol.

You know what's funny? I know both you and SubbieOnWheels and always enjoy what you have to say - whether I've ever written back or not. Interesting ...

Thank you! That makes me feel a whole lot better.

_____________________________

Bethical
Beat me, strike me, take away my reindeer! I'll never tell! -- Walt Kelly, Pogo Possum
I yam what I yam - Popeye

http://www.myspace.com/bethical_wheels

(in reply to Bound2One)

Profile

Post #: 41

RE: Please Be Honest With Me - 1/27/2008 7:21:00 PM

Bound2One

Posts: 614
Joined: 1/11/2008
Status: offline

Cute picture on your profile! I'd get rid of the small, pink font. I noticed that you didn't say in your profile what you were looking for ... play dates, friends, long-term relationship? What do you want and need in a partner? Beyond a somewhat laundry-list of characteristics, tell the reader what you're looking for. If you have a sassy side, let it out - show some personality in your profile. When a profile makes me smile, I remember it. Also, you do say you 'prefer women'. I rather make that assumption since you are a lesbian .. or is it that you're bi? That point left me a bit confused.

Good luck!

(in reply to summerblossom)

Profile

Post #: 42

RE: Please Be Honest With Me - 1/27/2008 7:59:48 PM

batshalom

Posts: 1990
Joined: 9/17/2007
Status: offline

~Fast Reply~

If, in relationships, you tend to be negative and self-deprecating as you were on a couple of posts at the beginning of this thread, it could take time to find someone who is equipped to handle someone with the emotional stresses you have.

Consider too that since you already have in your mind that people don't like you, you may be unaware of how hard others try to get close to you - when your walls are up and fortified, it's hard to get additional troops inside, even when they are your reinforcements.

You also may imagine slights where there are none. You may be seeing ghosts where there are none and thus keeping away the very people who long to love you.

For your depression, I do hope you are seeing a qualified license clinical psychologist or a psychiatrist. I wish you well for your future.

(in reply to Bound2One)

Profile

Post #: 43

RE: Please Be Honest With Me - 1/27/2008 9:43:51 PM

swtnsparkling

Posts: 1738
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

everytime I see a thread such as this one- my first thought is: nice way to gain a lot of attention to your profile

_____________________________

Never make anyone a priority who treats you as an option 2003

Walk in Peace

A "No" uttered from deepest conviction is better than a "Yes" uttered merely to please

(in reply to batshalom)

Profile

Post #: 44

RE: Please Be Honest With Me - 1/29/2008 10:00:35 PM

summerblossom

Posts: 145
Joined: 11/17/2007
Status: offline

well this was all certainly an exausting list of suggestions and critisisms to read so I will take some time to think about it....alot of people did suggest changing the small pink font and being more expressive....

before this my profile was probably too expressive and loud and too long so i asumed if i made a small pink font i would come across more appealing to people...i guess i was wrong so i will have to re think things...thankyou for all the compliments and suggestions i really do appreciate it all

_____________________________

''The greatest thing you will ever learn in life is just to love and be loved in return.'' Moulin Rouge

(in reply to swtnsparkling)

Profile

Post #: 45

RE: Please Be Honest With Me - 1/29/2008 10:20:57 PM

summerblossom

Posts: 145
Joined: 11/17/2007
Status: offline

while thinking of a better profile i also did take some of your suggestions and uploaded a second photo, filled out the interests, and filled out who im seeking..thanks again all

_____________________________

''The greatest thing you will ever learn in life is just to love and be loved in return.'' Moulin Rouge

(in reply to summerblossom)

Profile

Post #: 46

RE: Please Be Honest With Me - 1/29/2008 11:54:45 PM

Gwynvyd

Posts: 4949
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SubbieOnWheels

I guess I have to work on my social skills more, too. I thought i had trouble in r/t because I didn't know how to approach people and begin a conversation. It became much worse when I landed in a wheelchair because my face is 18 inches below other people's. But online I should be on a level playing field with others, and I still don't have that skillset. I try to post intelligent, insightful things in the forums - or silly things in the silly threads - but either way, there's something "off" in what I say, because seldom do I see anyone even acknowledging that I said anything; the "conversation" just continues as if I hadn't said a thing. So, summerblossom, I know somewhat how you feel. If "me" is so uninteresting, what can I do?

You say a lot of really good things.. and I am usualy sitting here smiling or giggling at the silly stuff or nodding at the serious stuff.

I used to think there was something wrong with me because I was the thread killer. I can't tell you how many threads have ended with me being the last person to reply to them. LOL It gave me a complex it did. But then I went back and looked.. and I saw what I wrote was a "closed ended" response.

I thought about that.. and in communications classes and public speaking I learned all about Open ended and close ended questions and responses. D'oh! I hadn't left it open for folks to comment unless they really felt strongly one way or another. They would either sit there and nod behind thier monitor.. or think me a twat.. and move on. LOL

I hope my experiance in thinking I was a complete tool for killing threads helps you understand it isnt you... it might just be how you pose things. You do have good imput.

and if the killing of threads is because people get sick of hearing my blathering.. oh crap... LOL

Gwyn

_____________________________

Self avowed Geek-Girl~
Come for the boobs, stay for the brains.

Be the kinda woman that when your feet hit the floor in the morning the Devil says "Oh shit, shes awake..."
~ Softandshy's "Shiney"

(in reply to SubbieOnWheels)

Profile

Post #: 47

RE: Please Be Honest With Me - 1/30/2008 12:19:48 AM

Gwynvyd

Posts: 4949
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: summerblossom

while thinking of a better profile i also did take some of your suggestions and uploaded a second photo, filled out the interests, and filled out who im seeking..thanks again all

I know the guys will complain about the les part.. but oh well...

*hurray another one for our team!* *ahem*
Ok.. back to my point..
Personaly what I like to see on a profile is them being a real person.
Yes.. it is true most get squicky about switches.. If you have a leaning one way or another.. I would certainly post it in your profile. Or what being a switch means to you. It means a great many things to a great many people.
Also a colossal turn off is laundry lists. Do not bother to contact me if: XYZ
You _must_ be:XYZ ... or people who whine, bitch and moan on thier profile about the wankers. We have all ran into them.. we all know there are fakes out there... move on in your life.. it makes you look like a bitter asshat.

Be yourself as almost everyone has said.. put something in there that says how you act as a person.. what your personality is. I think the "ideal evening" idea is a great one.. with all the details. As long as you have an interesting profile it can be longish. Mine is a bit of a novel.. and I know most never get through it. ( almost no one gives me the bloody code word from the bottom of it)

If there are things that you *need* in a realtionship and are posting them Ask... do not demand. That will go a long ways.

I also love to see something creative in a persons journal. as I said before I swooned when I saw one lady had recipes in hers! How freaking awesome is that? Others have poetry... some have stories.. some have bits of thier life tucked in here and there.

Folks who email me with a blank or incomplete profile usualy (98% of the time) are asked to fill out thier profile and message me again later.

I also dislike the whole copy and paste thier profile into my inbox thing with nothing personal added as a note to *me* It is akin to getting junk mail at home.

I wish you luck...

and you know what if some folks dont like you... that is thier deal... I get nasty letters all the time. I got one yesterday that simply said "Ugh". thier profile said only "Goodbye Losers" well that said it all now didnt it. LOL

Nill illigitimi carborundum

Gwyn

_____________________________

Self avowed Geek-Girl~
Come for the boobs, stay for the brains.

Be the kinda woman that when your feet hit the floor in the morning the Devil says "Oh shit, shes awake..."
~ Softandshy's "Shiney"

(in reply to summerblossom)

Profile

Post #: 48

RE: Please Be Honest With Me - 1/30/2008 6:17:50 AM

Jeffff

Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

quote:

ORIGINAL: summerblossom

unfortunatly it seems that just 'being me' has been the problem..........

Well then, it sucks to be you....There are some people that are probably meant to be alone. If you haven't developed social skills don't possess the ability to engage in a meaningful conversation and cannot compensate for those flaws with some good ol' fashioned external beauty...Then I would think that it is safe to say that you are pretty much screwed.

I like to eat pussy as well...Not all...Cuz some gash be fetid.

Would someone like a cigarette?.....

Jeff

I like to eat pussy also

(in reply to domiguy)

Profile

Post #: 49

RE: Please Be Honest With Me - 1/30/2008 8:48:45 AM

SubbieOnWheels

Posts: 590
Joined: 12/14/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Gwynvyd

You say a lot of really good things.. and I am usualy sitting here smiling or giggling at the silly stuff or nodding at the serious stuff.

Thank you, Gwyn. It's nice to know someone appreciates my posts. I find myself doing the giggling or nodding at others' posts, too, so I know what you mean - we don't always know how we've affected people we can't see.

quote:

I used to think there was something wrong with me because I was the thread killer.

[raises hand] Yep, I'm a thread-killer, too.

quote:

I can't tell you how many threads have ended with me being the last person to reply to them. LOL It gave me a complex it did. But then I went back and looked.. and I saw what I wrote was a "closed ended" response.

That's what it is! I try to be clever, and I end up being so clever that there's no possible reply. Thank you for the insight.

BTW I perved your profile, and I know your code word. ;)

_____________________________

Bethical
Beat me, strike me, take away my reindeer! I'll never tell! -- Walt Kelly, Pogo Possum
I yam what I yam - Popeye

http://www.myspace.com/bethical_wheels

(in reply to Gwynvyd)

Profile

Post #: 50