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RE: Submissive Mistress - 1/29/2008 12:56:32 AM   
Asherdelampyr


Posts: 9556
Joined: 11/14/2006
From: The Desert
Status: offline 		Asparagus is the law??? Damn!

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Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Submissive Mistress - 1/29/2008 12:59:30 AM   
scifi1133


Posts: 8529
Joined: 3/27/2007
From: virginia
Status: offline 		Basically it boils down to this. Why would anyone want someone who cant even control themselves enough to not run around on their partner. If you dont have enough self respect to be honest then why would anyone else want you?
I think the way I generally say it is.....show some class.

< Message edited by scifi1133 -- 1/29/2008 1:01:50 AM >

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Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Submissive Mistress - 1/29/2008 3:08:34 AM   
subrob1967


Posts: 4591
Joined: 9/13/2004
Status: offline 		I wonder how he would feel if his wife decided to be a submissive mistress to some other married guy.

(in reply to scifi1133)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Submissive Mistress - 1/29/2008 3:52:25 AM   
beltainefaerie


Posts: 610
Joined: 4/15/2006
Status: offline 		Plenty of people in the world are willing to cheat or help others cheat (which amounts to the same morality in my view).  Others simply aren't.  I am in many ways the submissive "mistress" to a married man.  It is just that we are poly, I am married too and his wife and I are friends.  I don't know about how common that is in America, Europe or Asia, but I do know that I don't care!  I think that building relationships on honesty and respect is important.  If you have to sneak around to have a relationship then you should probably value yourself and your partners more.

(in reply to subrob1967)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Submissive Mistress - 1/29/2008 5:26:34 AM   
liminalRapture


Posts: 181
Joined: 9/6/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1
So true.  I find it arrogant and provincial when people talk as though just spending time in their own city means they are sophisticated.


You are right.  And I knew I was being catty.  But if he is going to say I'm not sophisticated because I don't want to be a mistress, I think it is fair game to throw it right back.  Where you live (and what you do in the place you live in--I had to work damn hard for the Patrick Stewart tickets!) is just as fair a mark of 'sophistication' as whether you will be someone's mistress.

_____________________________

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(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Submissive Mistress - 1/29/2008 5:59:11 AM   
Lucylastic


Posts: 40310
Status: offline 		$10 says he doesnt come back again.
Sophistication my ass.
Thats the most sophisticated thing I could come up with at such short notice
Lucy


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(in reply to liminalRapture)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Submissive Mistress - 1/29/2008 6:04:15 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		he's here however probably not liking the responses to his thread


*waves "hi" to DoctorYale*


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(in reply to Lucylastic)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Submissive Mistress - 1/29/2008 8:01:30 AM   
ItalianSMistress


Posts: 427
Joined: 1/19/2007
From: Niagara Region Ontario Canada
Status: offline 		I agree, he is here reading, but wont reply again.  I would like him to answer the question asked above
What about your wife DRY?  I am sure one of us could take her on as a slave......
is that alright with you?

_____________________________

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"Dominance is the ability to create a hunger in someone that's so strong they will do anything, anytime, anywhere just to please you."


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(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Submissive Mistress - 1/29/2008 8:13:53 AM   
Emperor1956


Posts: 2370
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline
quote:

The Wanky OP:   There appears to be so much vitrol directed toward married men looking for a submissive... 


Is there?  I haven't found that "vitrol", and I've been privileged to have several submissive lovers.  Hmmmm...I wonder why you have such bad luck?

quote:

   that I have been forced to consider the notion that American woman are relatively unsophisticated in their appreciation for enjoying the role of a submissive mistress to a married man. 


OH...that's why.  You are a jag off!  And I'm sorry you are being "forced" to consider something.  How?  I hope its some really viscous CBT.

quote:

  This is quite acceptable in other societies, both European and Asian. 
   Is it really "Doctor"?  Could we have some sources?   I don't think Asian or European women are especially fond of being cheated on by liars.  Or isn't that what you meant was "quite acceptable"?

quote:

  Therefore, I am left to ponder the fact that while submissives proudly proclaim they are not bound by conventional sexual mores, they are still constrained by conventional patters of relationships.  Those seeking a 24/7 relationship or a LTR seem, at least to me, to be wanting a marriage although calling it by a different name. 
  I see.  "convention" to you means that you can lie to your wife, enter into a self-gratifying sexual relationship with the "scent" of D/s because hey, that's kinky and fun and makes it ok because poor poor pitiful you is stuck in a vanilla marriage, and disparage those women who choose to run the other way when they sniff your wankership approaching.

quote:

  Where are there truly open minded, sexual and sensual American woman who would proudly serve as their Dom's mistress ?
  They are all over CollarMe.  And they exist in real life (thank God).  Again...I wonder why you are having such bad luck, Doc.

E.

Edited to add:  What irritates me about the OP and his ilk is that on some level, he diminishes my choice to be in a polyamory, open marriage.  Moreover, he disparages my wife, who also has made that choice, and my girl (and others I've been with).  I can take a flame or two (hell, my much discussed unbounded ego doesn't even get a scorch mark from this sort) but NO ONE messes with my own!  Then again, we all know the "sour grapes" types have been with us from the time there was one sad guy out there coveting what someone else had.


< Message edited by Emperor1956 -- 1/29/2008 8:21:57 AM >

_____________________________

"When you wake up, Pooh," said Piglet, "what's the first thing you say?"
"What's for breakfast? What do you say, Piglet?"
"I say, I wonder what's going to happen exciting today?"
Pooh nodded thoughtfully.
"It's the same thing," he said.

(in reply to DoctorYale)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Submissive Mistress - 1/29/2008 10:00:12 AM   
parttimehotty


Posts: 4002
Joined: 11/19/2007
From: Virginville
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DoctorYale

There appears to be so much vitrol directed toward married men looking for a submissive, that I have been forced to consider the notion that American woman are relatively unsophisticated in their appreciation for enjoying the role of a submissive mistress to a married man.  This is quite acceptable in other societies, both European and Asian.  Therefore, I am left to ponder the fact that while submissives proudly proclaim they are not bound by conventional sexual mores, they are still constrained by conventional patters of relationships.  Those seeking a 24/7 relationship or a LTR seem, at least to me, to be wanting a marriage although calling it by a different name.  Where are there truly open minded, sexual and sensual American woman who would proudly serve as their Dom's mistress ? 


Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt then used the same shirt to  wipe the shit off my face when it hit the fan. Oh sorry, was that TOO unsophisticated for you, Doc?


< Message edited by parttimehotty -- 1/29/2008 10:02:29 AM >

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(in reply to DoctorYale)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Submissive Mistress - 1/29/2008 10:32:35 AM   
OmegaG


Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DoctorYale

There appears to be so much vitrol directed toward married men looking for a submissive, that I have been forced to consider the notion that American woman are relatively unsophisticated in their appreciation for enjoying the role of a submissive mistress to a married man.  This is quite acceptable in other societies, both European and Asian.  Therefore, I am left to ponder the fact that while submissives proudly proclaim they are not bound by conventional sexual mores, they are still constrained by conventional patters of relationships.  Those seeking a 24/7 relationship or a LTR seem, at least to me, to be wanting a marriage although calling it by a different name.  Where are there truly open minded, sexual and sensual American woman who would proudly serve as their Dom's mistress ? 


oh, I wish I knew more about modern European culture so that I could debate the cultural reasons behind extramariatal affairs, in fact, I wish I had some current statistics to see if the number of women submitting to this lifestyle is truly as great as it was in past generations.

What I can say is that women of the past looked to men who could provide for them outweighed the number of affluent men, to be kept by a married man increased a woman's chances of survival or living in comfort when her ability to make a living for herself was limited.  Europe has a tradition of multiple wives and concubines that dates back to the days of pre-history.  Men who had wealth and power had women.

The original settlers to America didn't appreciate this tradition and therefore it wasn't passed through this society.  Further, with this being the land of oppurtunity and vastly less overcrowded there were more options for survival for women even before our current century.

I'd suggest that kept women are becoming extinct in Europe especially with paradigm shifts such as this which suggest a shift in gender identity.  But of course there will be those that will romanticize the practice, will forget that the man who kept a mistress rarely had time or money for himself, and will generally overlook the responsibility that keeping a mistress entails.

These men are not sophisticated in my opinion any more then the baby-daddy in a low income urban center.

Am I sophisticated in other people's eyes?  I couldn't care less.  But I do know that I'm selfish.  I can pay my own bills and have no need of a sugar daddy so I will wait for a person that can devote himself to me rather then expecting me to be grateful for the crumbs left over from his primary relationship.

rant mode OFF

_____________________________


Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

(in reply to DoctorYale)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Submissive Mistress - 1/29/2008 10:33:48 AM   
rubberpet


Posts: 1743
Joined: 4/6/2006
From: The Land of Voodoo
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DoctorYale

There appears to be so much vitrol directed toward married men looking for a submissive, that I have been forced to consider the notion that American woman are relatively unsophisticated in their appreciation for enjoying the role of a submissive mistress to a married man.  This is quite acceptable in other societies, both European and Asian.  Therefore, I am left to ponder the fact that while submissives proudly proclaim they are not bound by conventional sexual mores, they are still constrained by conventional patters of relationships.  Those seeking a 24/7 relationship or a LTR seem, at least to me, to be wanting a marriage although calling it by a different name.  Where are there truly open minded, sexual and sensual American woman who would proudly serve as their Dom's mistress ? 


Damn!!!  I don't know about the rest of y'all, but I see this guy getting a MAJOR collarme beatdown by the unsophisticated American dommes out here!

My opinion to this "statement" is very simple.  It's evolution, my friend.  American women have evolved into the role of dominant equality to their male counterparts.  Just because one has a penis don't mean the vagina should bow down.  My owner would never bow down to me or ANY man, for that matter.  She is a strong, independent woman and dominant outright.  While other cultures believe in the tradition of a submissive mistress, some American women have found their independence and denounced the need to submit to a dom because of sheer tradition.

All hail the independent American dommes!!!

_____________________________

Collared and devoted property of Mistress Lorelei (vampchick88) as of 3/26/08.

Rubberpet - The Resident Anti-Subby and mysterious shadowy figure known as Voodoo, proud hitman and wiseguy for the Subby Mafia.


(in reply to DoctorYale)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Submissive Mistress - 1/29/2008 10:37:24 AM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		Actually, rubberpet, I think the subs/slaves have it handled.
Not that the doms/dommes aren't welcome to come join the fun!

(in reply to rubberpet)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Submissive Mistress - 1/29/2008 10:39:00 AM   
OmegaG


Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx

Actually, rubberpet, I think the subs/slaves have it handled.
Not that the doms/dommes aren't welcome to come join the fun!


my thoughts too, but rubberpet's adoration for his Mistress is too sweet to check.

_____________________________


Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Submissive Mistress - 1/29/2008 10:46:36 AM   
rubberpet


Posts: 1743
Joined: 4/6/2006
From: The Land of Voodoo
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OmegaG

quote:

ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx

Actually, rubberpet, I think the subs/slaves have it handled.
Not that the doms/dommes aren't welcome to come join the fun!


my thoughts too, but rubberpet's adoration for his Mistress is too sweet to check.


Thank you so much, OmegaG.  Since I cannot show Mistress my adoration face to face yet (She's still in West Virginia), I make it my duty to declare it to Her as often and through any median as possible.  I want Her to know how much I love Her and think about Her.

As for the pinhead's comment, it was fun reading the subbies gang up on him.  I wish I would have seen this thread last night...I would have loved to bring my bat to play some ball!   I can't wait to see if any more dommes are going to go off on him.  LOL

*popping popcorn, snagging some cookies from Asher, and getting a front row seat for the beatdown*  Anyone care to join me?

_____________________________

Collared and devoted property of Mistress Lorelei (vampchick88) as of 3/26/08.

Rubberpet - The Resident Anti-Subby and mysterious shadowy figure known as Voodoo, proud hitman and wiseguy for the Subby Mafia.


(in reply to OmegaG)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Submissive Mistress - 1/29/2008 10:53:00 AM   
YesMistressIrish


Posts: 1135
Joined: 5/1/2007
From: Calif
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: rubberpet

quote:

ORIGINAL: DoctorYale

There appears to be so much vitrol directed toward married men looking for a submissive, that I have been forced to consider the notion that American woman are relatively unsophisticated in their appreciation for enjoying the role of a submissive mistress to a married man.  This is quite acceptable in other societies, both European and Asian.  Therefore, I am left to ponder the fact that while submissives proudly proclaim they are not bound by conventional sexual mores, they are still constrained by conventional patters of relationships.  Those seeking a 24/7 relationship or a LTR seem, at least to me, to be wanting a marriage although calling it by a different name.  Where are there truly open minded, sexual and sensual American woman who would proudly serve as their Dom's mistress ? 


Damn!!!  I don't know about the rest of y'all, but I see this guy getting a MAJOR collarme beatdown by the unsophisticated American dommes out here!

My opinion to this "statement" is very simple.  It's evolution, my friend.  American women have evolved into the role of dominant equality to their male counterparts.  Just because one has a penis don't mean the vagina should bow down.  My owner would never bow down to me or ANY man, for that matter.  She is a strong, independent woman and dominant outright.  While other cultures believe in the tradition of a submissive mistress, some American women have found their independence and denounced the need to submit to a dom because of sheer tradition.

All hail the independent American dommes!!!


Shazaaam!

ps: where's that link to your Dommes pics? hmmm....?

< Message edited by YesMistressIrish -- 1/29/2008 11:05:10 AM >

(in reply to rubberpet)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Submissive Mistress - 1/29/2008 10:56:57 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Most French men I know who have mistresses can afford them. Can you? Because expecting her to do this while supporting herself and her own family is pretty cheesy.

Actually American married men I know who have had mistresses have been able to afford them also. Are you offering to buy her an expensive condo, unlimited shopping accounts, take her out several times a week to top restaurants, expensive jewelry etc? Because if you want her waiting around for you to drop in while she'll be stress free, happy to see you then the cost of an unstressed life comes high.

I've never known a bus driver with a mistress. I have known heads of state, CEO's, multimillionaires and billionaires who have.

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Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Submissive Mistress - 1/29/2008 11:09:29 AM   
OmegaG


Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Most French men I know who have mistresses can afford them. Can you? Because expecting her to do this while supporting herself and her own family is pretty cheesy.

Actually American married men I know who have had mistresses have been able to afford them also. Are you offering to buy her an expensive condo, unlimited shopping accounts, take her out several times a week to top restaurants, expensive jewelry etc? Because if you want her waiting around for you to drop in while she'll be stress free, happy to see you then the cost of an unstressed life comes high.

I've never known a bus driver with a mistress. I have known heads of state, CEO's, multimillionaires and billionaires who have.


I think you just said what I'd meant to say in far fewer words, you are my heroine now.

_____________________________


Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Submissive Mistress - 1/29/2008 1:12:22 PM   
DoctorYale


Posts: 6
Joined: 8/7/2007
Status: offline 		A reply to one and all.  I have been fascinated by the level of angst and vitriolic denunciations that have been sent my way.  Each and every one of you (well almost), have proven my point.  And so, we can soon dispense with this thread.  I shall remain on this site, occassionaly join in forum discussions and keep my eyes open for one who is unlike any of you who have chosen to answer.  I am of course totally fascinated by the fact that so many Dommes chose to respond with such bitterness.  I will have to reflect upon this and ponder as to the reason you felt so challenged by this posting.

(in reply to OmegaG)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Submissive Mistress - 1/29/2008 1:20:06 PM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		Well, I am european, so feel pretty able to answer.
Being into wiitwd does not negate responsibility.  I would be ok being a Mistress in a relationship that the wife had agreed to the situation.  However, cheating is cheating and being open minded, european, american, alternative or 'insertwhateverhere' makes no difference.
 
Now your OP didn't state whether there is cheating involved.  If there is no cheating involved, I would suggest that there are more people out there that are acceptable of that 'Mistress' scenario than a lying relationship.  So maybe if you make your intention clear, people won't jump to the (possibly) wrong concluesion.
 
the.dark.

_____________________________
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love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to DoctorYale)
Profile   Post #: 40
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