I Stop (Full Version)

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LadyHathor -> I Stop (1/31/2008 4:43:49 PM)

ok Ladies, we all get the rotating pics of the submissives--and I have to admit they are for the most part--getting it ( no naked or cock pics) and are pretty hot--most of us are, well what we are, so what keeps you from grabbing him and saying  "MINE"--
 
(this is intended to save some boys from the internet crap and to really show what the life is all about, well I hope anyway and break the mystique of Domme hell)
 
 



aidan -> RE: I Stop (1/31/2008 5:33:54 PM)

Okay...I've read over this post a few times, and I'm still not sure what exactly is being asked.

I know it's probably not directed at us (subs), but I just want to clear it up for anyone else who might be lost.

Not a jab or anything, I get the idea there's an interesting topic here.



SweetDommes -> RE: I Stop (1/31/2008 5:46:52 PM)

I'm not sure I understand either, aidan, but here's what I get from it -

Now that most guys are getting it and not sending stupid pictures, what keeps us from grabbing up the boys who send us pics that are hot.

My answer - we're picky ... being hot doesn't mean that they are compatable so we have to talk before we'll claim anyone.



LadyHathor -> RE: I Stop (1/31/2008 6:01:39 PM)

Yes, we see so many boys list, then 24 hours later say they are collared or have been taken by a Domina, I think it sets a false standard--so yes, My question is--I stop because:



LadyLolly -> RE: I Stop (1/31/2008 6:13:23 PM)

Ok. are we also assumiing we've also gotten past the
Mistress, I want to eat your poo
and
I will service your dogs too...
and
the laundry list of how they will "get off" by serving  - mostly  
       involving that lil pecker of thiers that they are still under the
       ilusion that we envy and cannot live without....
and
how they want to own thier very own dommie wommie, err want to be owned  by

Looks aren't all that.  Sure I admire a pretty face or a taunt tush as much as the next person - but dosen't mean I'm going to enjoy thier company once they open thier mouth......

There's terms to come to terms with.  Goals, objectives, needs, parameters to examine.  Character, sincerity, level of understanding to get comfortable with. All kinds of compatibility factors to consider. Are they likely to enhance my life with thier presence enough to offset the investment of time and effort on my part?  Will I and do I even want to be fulfilling thier particular needs and wants - really?  Are they trainable?  Passive agressive?  More about the "stuff"/kink than the D/s. Do they really understand what they are asking for - and just what they are liable to get?

Bottom line, are they really meeting my criteria and am I really able to fulfil thiers.



PsyVamp -> RE: I Stop (1/31/2008 6:14:00 PM)

Physically attractive is nice, but it needs to be tempered with the right attitude. 
I need to be attracted to the person if they will be in my bed, but from an M/s standpoint, I need someone with the right mind set for my needs.
I need one
to be respectful,
to follow direction,
to not yell "hard limit" to things just because they are afraid.  (although limits are always respected, using the words "hard limit" as a cop out gets a bit old after a while)

LJ




LotusSong -> RE: I Stop (1/31/2008 6:15:21 PM)

I would be reluctant because if this "hot submissive" is soooo prime... I'd doubt that is his picture to begin with.
 
Boys, woman aren't THAT visual.  Looks fade... the type of pic you send gives me an idea of what you are all about. 



LadyHibiscus -> RE: I Stop (1/31/2008 8:27:21 PM)

I will respectfully disagree--I am VERY visual!  But, and this is where I think LS is headed--what women find pleasant to look at is much more varied, and we look at different features. 

As for the OP....well, if they don't meet the other criteria, I don't care how attractive they are.  If they meet the criteria and are on the other side of the world, same story.



MisPandora -> RE: I Stop (1/31/2008 8:34:45 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHathor

Yes, we see so many boys list, then 24 hours later say they are collared or have been taken by a Domina, I think it sets a false standard--so yes, My question is--I stop because:

Color me slow but I still don't understand what you're getting at.  I stop *what*?



MsCfromMelbourne -> RE: I Stop (2/1/2008 12:46:32 AM)

I do not understand the question either, but I do have an observation about internet dating

Grab the good looking new arrivals before the competition and corrupt them first.  Same as you would at a BDSM club. 

If a guy has been on collarme for months or years, there is probably good reason he is still supposedly single.   He has been checked out and passed over.  Or he just likes pretending to be available.  Or he plays around.  Something smells fishy

Are all new arrivals a good catch?  Of course not.  But the ratio of "keepers" to duds is better amongst the new (and naive [;)])

Do I sound predatory? Yes.  What can I say - I have a good hearted, loyal and handsome sub so I must be doing something right

Although beauty is in the eye of the beholder.......



MissMorrigan -> RE: I Stop (2/1/2008 1:05:09 AM)

I stopped b/c:

I needed my submissive to understand where his fantasies end and reality begins
I needed my submissive to comprehend that my world will not revolve around him - 'do me' subs do zero for me
I needed my submissive to realise that while he may have a list of limits, many of which were hard, I refuse to allow there to be any part of his life I cannot reach into.

While I did snap him up quickly, not based on his looks, although they are also important to me, it was b/c he took the time to get to know me, and I him, and we fulfil one another.



ItalianSMistress -> RE: I Stop (2/1/2008 5:33:36 AM)

I am so confused [&:]



LadyHathor -> RE: I Stop (2/1/2008 5:35:20 AM)

Thanks MissMorrigan--( maybe too many days of writing marketing content as My brain is lost for words...) but you have the right grasp of My intent---
 
I guess I should have said more---I don't do that because--that may have been clearer---I do apologize to My colleagues for some confusion---the point being that there are many of Us that  believe in the relationship, not just gathering boys like 52 pick up---hope this helps and I hope we see more comments about this--



MstrssPassion -> RE: I Stop (2/1/2008 5:36:37 AM)

<edit since you replied just before me>

but I still don't get it

I guess my only comment is that if these people are so eager to hook up that they will do so in 24 hours after signing up... GOOD FOR THEM... they would not be suitable for me & now that they are being entertained they won't be knocking at my door (since I don't view myself as someone's source of entertainment)



rubberpet -> RE: I Stop (2/1/2008 5:50:27 AM)

I gathered from Mistress's tastes is She is a very visual person.  When I sent my intro letter to Her, She admitted that what caused Her to open my letter was my collarme nick...rubberpet.  She wanted to know what a "rubberpet" was...lol.  Before She read my letter, She perved my pics and admits that if She didn't find me attractive, She never would have read my letter.  The fact I was wearing my latex catsuit in most of the pics really piqued Her curiosity because She is probably more obsessed with the rubber fetish than I am.  Even then, it took almost a month to get four letters from Her.  She was far from just jumping on me saying, "Mine!"  I had to work for it and really earn it.  My nick and the pics of me in rubber might have gotten Her attention, but the effort I put forth in getting to know Her, the woman, was what won Her heart.  I get to meet the Domme in Her for the first time at the end of March!  Yay! [:D]



MissMorrigan -> RE: I Stop (2/1/2008 6:04:03 AM)

Lady Hathor, I personally feel that so many people view CM and other such sites as 'Kinky Supermarkets', where they can created a profile and select the play toy of their choice. While some may enjoy that form of interaction, many don't and want to forge relationships based on more than sexual urges. So while I enjoy seeing someone that takes care of themselves, it isn't the B & E to a person and getting to know someone takes time, lots of it. So many people rush into bed, then wonder why, when the bloom of lust has worn a little, they have nothing to inspire one another with.



Dari -> RE: I Stop (2/1/2008 6:09:28 AM)

heh.  I think I can help clarify (for once):

When I see a cute pic, or a hawt piece of ass on the site, and I'm just flipping through - and they're not pics of a guy impaling himself on a toy, or cock pics or a profile filled with all the naughty, kinky things he will do for me, with his no-limit self - when they have a good profile, and an attractive pic, and their interests match my own - why do I not reach out and grab them for my own?

I stop because....

...even having the same likes and dislikes isn't a guaranteed mesh until I know their personality.
...I have very limited time, and what time I do have I generally prefer to spend with the subs I have.
...I'm not really looking right now - my life, such as it is, is complete.
...until I see the way someone posts or thinks or talks, I'm probably not going to take the time to contact them.
...I just don't get their particular fetish or interests, even if some of them match my own.

Was that more what you're looking for, in response?



thetammyjo -> RE: I Stop (2/1/2008 6:52:27 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHathor

Yes, we see so many boys list, then 24 hours later say they are collared or have been taken by a Domina, I think it sets a false standard--so yes, My question is--I stop because:


Looks are very far down on my list.

Someone who sends me a "hot" picture clearly has not read my profile. An inability to understand my profile and the attempt to contract me for a relationship or scene is an immediate "NO".

I've had "hot" and I've had pretty stupid boys/men.

I'd much rather have empathy and intelligence than looks any day.

Both is best -- luckily Fox is both in my eyes.



Evanesce -> RE: I Stop (2/1/2008 8:18:56 AM)

I recently received an email from a VERY attractive submissive male.  He had the type of looks that generally make me want to throw him down and do all sorts of nasty, evil things to him.  What made me pause, however, was the email itself.  In it, he claimed to have read my profile not once, but twice to "make sure he didn't miss anything."  Yet, his email mentioned absolutely nothing about how he would fit into my life at all.  He wrote a lot of pretty words that meant nothing, and I suspect that same email has been sent to dozens of other dominant women.  It was that generic.  This is the type of approach that gets an immediate "Thanks, but no thanks," from me.  If a submissive can't take the time to tell me about himself and show me something that will give me an indication that he's actually interested in the life I share with the Kaptin, then I'm not wasting my time on him.



YesMistressIrish -> RE: I Stop (2/1/2008 9:41:25 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

I would be reluctant because if this "hot submissive" is soooo prime... I'd doubt that is his picture to begin with.
 
Boys, woman aren't THAT visual.  Looks fade... the type of pic you send gives me an idea of what you are all about. 


Many of the subs are very hot looking and look as good or better than their pics in person. And, I am very visual. A beautiful man or woman in motions is a moving work of art.

And, of course I agree with their pics being an insight into who they are inside... I like to see pics of their eyes.

I loved this part of her post above by LadyLolly:

"There's terms to come to terms with.  Goals, objectives, needs, parameters to examine.  Character, sincerity, level of understanding to get comfortable with. All kinds of compatibility factors to consider. Are they likely to enhance my life with thier presence enough to offset the investment of time and effort on my part?  Will I and do I even want to be fulfilling thier particular needs and wants - really?  Are they trainable?  Passive agressive?  More about the "stuff"/kink than the D/s. Do they really understand what they are asking for - and just what they are liable to get?

Bottom line, are they really meeting my criteria and am I really able to fulfil theirs. "
 
Irish



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