RE: BDSM and the pregnant woman

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RE: BDSM and the pregnant woman - 2/4/2008 6:41:16 AM

DesFIP

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Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
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Intelligent people consult their doctors on safe play. Spanking won't cause any trouble. Fisting might. Needles in the nipples at the end of term may cause colostrum too early. Beating thighs with a cable or clothes hanger when she is suffering the onset of varicose veins is just plain dumb, treatment is lengthy and expensive. Inverted suspension is out. Actually I'd be leery of any suspension with her center of gravity so far off from normal.

If the doctor says no sex, you need to clarify if this is no orgasm or no exposure to sperm in the vagina or both. People usually forget to ask for detailed explanations.

But basically if you are unwilling to ask your doctor, then err on the side of caution and refrain. Better of course is if you get some therapy to deal with your conflicted issues on sexuality before you pass them on to another generation.

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RE: BDSM and the pregnant woman - 2/4/2008 7:04:30 AM

Aylee

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

But basically if you are unwilling to ask your doctor, then err on the side of caution and refrain. Better of course is if you get some therapy to deal with your conflicted issues on sexuality before you pass them on to another generation.

Very nice.

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RE: BDSM and the pregnant woman - 2/4/2008 7:05:00 AM

RedMagic1

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP
Better of course is if you get some therapy to deal with your conflicted issues on sexuality before you pass them on to another generation.

A rousing "hell yeah" to that! My thanks also to Clover, DaddysReadHead and everyone else who has contributed sanity to this topic.

And, DesFIP, the Mods have deleted the most horrendous comments out of the other thread, but the most hideous posts, including the ones still standing, were all written by people who, judging from pics and profiles, are all fairly young. It's a shame.

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RE: BDSM and the pregnant woman - 2/4/2008 7:59:32 AM

AxilX

Posts: 17
Joined: 1/4/2008
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My submissive wife is currently pregnant and while most of what needs to be said, already has been i thought i might throw my experience/opinion/research into the lot.

First, of course you don't need to stop or suspend your lifestyle while pregnant, that's silly. As mentioned previously there are plenty of activities that have no physical component at all, and plenty that do, but won't have any effect on the pregnancy. As to endorphins, most BDSM related endorphins are a response to stress, and yes, the baby will feel that stress. This means heavy impact play whether directed at the stomach or not, ought to be avoided, but a light fun spanking now and then isn't going to cause any more stress than your sub going up and down the stairs.

Anything that "pushes the limits" of a sub mentally, physically, emotionally i would avoid alltogether, extreme stress can cause immediate labor. This is your bodies biological response to help better your chances of survivial if it think the stress might be too much on you with a baby on board.

In most pregnancys not only is sex not harmful it's helpful in preparing the body for delivery. Orgasm exersizes the muscules used during the "pushing" stage of the pregnancy. Somthing else some of you might find particularly interesting is that play that causes vaginal stretching can make delivery easier, and can minimize the risk of tearing when the babies head breaches. What you do need to avoid is anything that pentrates too deeply, there is a mucus plug that protects the baby from direct contact, but it can be damaged, especially by things harder than a penis.

One other thing i haven't seen mentioned yet is it's unadvisable for a woman to be kept on her back for long periods of time late in the preganancy as it increases the chances the baby won't be positioned properly for delivery and can result in a C-section. So if you're into longterm bondage, make sure the sub is positioned on her side, or sitting up.

In general, you're fine if you use your brain, turn down the intensity if you're used to more extreme play, and consult your doctor if in doubt.

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RE: BDSM and the pregnant woman - 2/4/2008 9:23:53 AM

IrishMist

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When I was pregnant, he still did exactly what he wanted, when he wanted, and how he wanted. Nothing was 'tempered', gentled, and nothing slowed down or stopped simply because I got myself knocked up.

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RE: BDSM and the pregnant woman - 2/4/2008 5:32:21 PM

snowandsub

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I am currently pregnant and deemed 'a special case' when it comes to my pregnancies - already have 1 UM - I have 3 specialist s due to my condition who all have said that it is perfectly fine for me to continue to be sexually active UNLESS my cervix has issues with penetration. my kink friendly specialist has stated that no 'long' objects, no fisting, no intense scenes, no pushing of moderate to hard limits and no stomach/lower back play (including no bondage) but he has recommended lots of orgasms and gentle play to help relax me and my insides... and besides my hubby aka my Master is a one who would stop everything at any sign of distress.

to be on the safe side we have tested with a doppler and during an orgasm the babys heartrate did not change and after a scene it did not change.

the victorians are to blame for a lot of standard societies and their view of unclean woman and pregnancy being akin to a death is insane but it has clouded a lot of judgements about sex and women. I know vanilla friends who were told even touching sperm would sent them into premature labour and if her husband suggested oral etc, she was to divorce him as he was cruel etc ... some things are just hard to believe in this day and age.

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