Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Set up to fail


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Set up to fail Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Set up to fail - 2/8/2008 10:56:57 AM   
charlotte12


Posts: 471
Joined: 5/9/2006
Status: offline 		I also was glad to see your qualification.  I figured that was what you meant from the first post but always nice to know for sure.

I love when Master makes me do something and then slaps me for it.  We've talked about him making me fuck other men and then punish me for being such a slut.  It sounds really hot though I know he plans to take this idea a little slow. 

I don't like feeling like I was set up to fail and then he is genuinely dissapointed in me.  That would mess with my head.  What I like about situations where he is obviously setting me up to fail is the sense of helplessness.  I am his to punish if he wants to, with or without a reason, his to mess with like a toy.  It's when I don't understand what's going on that I get anxious. 

charlotte


_____________________________

Stephan's slaveling

"I'm not superior, I'm just more important." Master (Stephann)

"When you are your freest self, who are you?" Jack Rinella

(in reply to ItalianSMistress)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Set up to fail - 2/8/2008 11:06:35 AM   
lockmeupplease


Posts: 202
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline 		 
I think the key words here are "games" and "play".  Example---I had a Mistress who would tickle me and then punish me if I made noise.  We both knew the noise was inevitable and that the "punishment" was not severe or truly related to my "failing".  It sounds like ItalianMistress's scenarios keep this in mind. (and they sound like fun!!!!)

(in reply to ItalianSMistress)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Set up to fail - 2/8/2008 11:31:10 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		It wouldn't matter if he told me afterwards that he wasn't serious, I would still feel like a failure. So this wouldn't work for me.

However, if he told me to do something impossible, and then gave me a play punishment that might work. Something obviously impossible like pick the winning lottery numbers.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to breatheasone)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Set up to fail - 2/8/2008 12:21:42 PM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: breatheasone

quote:

ORIGINAL: ItalianSMistress

I was wondering how many Dom/mes set their slaves up to fail games.  Now, I DON’T  mean fail in a general sense, as that would be counter productive to any kind of training. I mean during session or just messing around and setting them up to fail a particular game or task.  I have always found this rather interesting and amusing esp when the slave knows they are being set up to fail, but still try to succeed anyway.  The goal of this, how I see it, is either to be amused by their efforts and get a great laugh out of their attempts to succeed in vain, and sometimes it sets them up for “punishment”.  Of course, not the serious kind ;)
 
For example, I sometimes like to have My boys stroking themselves while I am doing something rather uninterested, and wont let them stop, but still instruct them not to cum.  Despite their efforts, sooner or later, they are going to cum if they can not stop stroking.  You can usually see it coming, as they tend to “buck up” quite a bit before it happens.  Or I have been known to tell My slaves to keep quiet while I know that My main goal is to make them say something, from what I am doing to them, and I wont stop until they fail.  I do lots of this type of thing, but those are the first two examples that came to My head.
 
So, how many others do things like this? 

This wouldn't appeal to me AT ALL....I'm not a big fan of being made a fool of.


i agree......a good smack around the face isn't funny really is it?

(in reply to breatheasone)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Set up to fail - 2/8/2008 12:29:10 PM   
laurell3


Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline 		There have actually been rather lenghty threads on this before, so I will not attempt to go into that much depth.  However, if one is truly setting another up for failure I don't see that as something I would enjoy.  If one is creating an impossible situation and then responding to it with action and both parties know that true success isn't really expected in the situation, that I have done and enjoyed and find very thought provoking.  Believe me, I will continue to attempt to achieve the impossible, it's how I'm wired.  We both will laugh at me and from it I eventually gain insight and it's also quite hot .

< Message edited by laurell3 -- 2/8/2008 12:30:03 PM >

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to Prinsexx)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Set up to fail - 2/8/2008 12:31:00 PM   
trappedinamuseum


Posts: 5066
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline 		This is just a FR -

I can't switch mindsets like that.  Failure is failure to me, whether he was "just kidding" or "doing it on purpose" or not.  It stills puts me in a place I am miserable in.  My personality is such that if I knew someone was setting me up to fail, I either wouldn't do it (as it is not worth the effort), or I would be very disappointed and angry with him for wasting both of our times. There are better ways we could occupy that time.

I don't find failure amusing in the least, and would not be amused to know he set me up just so he could punish me.  I would rather he just do it, because he "felt like it", not because I failed.  

But, that's just my .02.

_____________________________

"You're gonna catch a cold, from the ice inside you soul.
Don't come back for me.
Don't come back at all" - Jar of Hearts

(in reply to Prinsexx)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Set up to fail - 2/8/2008 4:15:53 PM   
servantheart


Posts: 960
Joined: 10/26/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Owner4SexSlave

quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112

Failure is not interesting. Not in training nor in play. I prefer success in both.


Oh damn it, my imagine of you being a hardcore Sadist is completely distroyed now... ;^)


Not to worry, Sir has His moments

_____________________________

When you really trust someone, you have to be okay with not understanding some things.
~Real Live Preacher, Real Live Preacher weblog, 07-08-04; Anonymous author of RealLivePreacher.com

(in reply to Owner4SexSlave)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Set up to fail - 2/8/2008 4:58:59 PM   
MichiganHeadmast


Posts: 726
Joined: 8/13/2006
Status: offline 		Isn't "predicament play" a form of setting one up to "fail," but in a fun way?  You know, "Keep your legs up in the air," and when you lower them, the rope and pulley rips the clothespins off your nipples.

And then there is constructive setting up to fail, like boot camp.  "Nice spit shine, soldier, but you have a scuff on your heel.  Give me 20!  Now your toes are scuffed.  Give me 20 more!"

And like anything else, at the extreme it can be abusive.



(in reply to charlotte12)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Set up to fail - 2/8/2008 5:06:37 PM   
Nineveh


Posts: 1299
Joined: 2/5/2008
Status: offline 		I can see how this could damage a delicate sub.  ON the other hand, one who had become to full of herself could be brought down and humbled by an impossible task.  I have done things like this, more as an exercise in humbling than as an excuse to punish, althoguh i have found those on occasion as well for subs who needed punishment as part of their structure, they needed to fail sometimes or they would feel wrong about their submission.

(in reply to MichiganHeadmast)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Set up to fail - 2/8/2008 7:09:42 PM   
AFlyInYourWeb


Posts: 284
Joined: 8/30/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ItalianSMistress

One thing I want to point out after reading all this is that I ALWAYS make sure they know after wards that I set it up like that.  I make sure of it, I dont want them thinking the acutally failed, making sure they know that I would not have stopped what I was doing UNTIL they failed.
 


This sounds like a mind-fuck to me.  They aren't for everyone, but with the right people on both sides, they can be exciting, and sometimes, very bonding.

< Message edited by AFlyInYourWeb -- 2/8/2008 7:10:53 PM >

_____________________________

Stories: http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=334308
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=335720
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=336666
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=337911

(in reply to ItalianSMistress)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Set up to fail - 2/8/2008 7:10:04 PM   
breatheasone


Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

they needed to fail sometimes or they would feel wrong about their submission.

WTF??


_____________________________

Romans 10:13,For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
Mike posts in black font
candy posts in pink font

(in reply to Nineveh)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Set up to fail - 2/8/2008 7:11:33 PM   
Nineveh


Posts: 1299
Joined: 2/5/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: breatheasone

quote:

they needed to fail sometimes or they would feel wrong about their submission.

WTF??



I know, it was alien to me at first as well.  But if she did not fail she would stop giving her all, and act more bratty, until she did fail and could be punished.  She needed to be punished. 

(in reply to breatheasone)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Set up to fail - 2/8/2008 7:14:03 PM   
breatheasone


Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Nineveh

quote:

ORIGINAL: breatheasone

quote:

they needed to fail sometimes or they would feel wrong about their submission.

WTF??



I know, it was alien to me at first as well.  But if she did not fail she would stop giving her all, and act more bratty, until she did fail and could be punished.  She needed to be punished. 


Hmmm... *is thinking how grateful I am for the Master I have*


_____________________________

Romans 10:13,For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
Mike posts in black font
candy posts in pink font

(in reply to Nineveh)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Set up to fail - 2/8/2008 7:36:35 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Nineveh
I know, it was alien to me at first as well.  But if she did not fail she would stop giving her all, and act more bratty, until she did fail and could be punished.  She needed to be punished. 

That sounds akin to subs who like to "test" their doms?  Is that it?

I can understand occasionally wanting to fail in order to feel ensconced in the submission as a perfectionist because it can bring me back to earth and give me back some real world perspective without breaking down.

But life brings about failure more than enough on its own for us to contrive it towards those goals so there's no problem :)

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to Nineveh)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Set up to fail - 2/8/2008 7:38:04 PM   
Nineveh


Posts: 1299
Joined: 2/5/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

That sounds akin to subs who like to "test" their doms?  Is that it?

I can understand occasionally wanting to fail in order to feel ensconced in the submission as a perfectionist because it can bring me back to earth and give me back some real world perspective without breaking down.

But life brings about failure more than enough on its own for us to contrive it towards those goals so there's no problem :)


Yes, she was very into testing me.  Seeing how far she could push, and i think she rather liked the feeling that came from being in trouble.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Set up to fail - 2/8/2008 7:41:50 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Ah ok, I can't stand testing and cut that down real fast.  A big signal of insecurity.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to Nineveh)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Set up to fail - 2/8/2008 7:58:57 PM   
MistressOfGa


Posts: 2929
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

The enema in diapers thing is pretty much like that.

Ouch! Now that is cruel and unusual punishment. Game or no game, when it messes with your kidney's it no longer is fun.
 
MoGa *who is much more serious than she need be tonight <s>*

_____________________________





(in reply to Leatherist)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Set up to fail - 2/8/2008 8:18:09 PM   
sodsta


Posts: 246
Joined: 7/19/2006
From: London, England
Status: offline 		I quite enjoy that. I had a Domme who once told me to stand on my tiptoes for as long as it took her to count to the number she was thinking of in her head. What she didn't tell me beforehand was that the number in her head was 2 million. I think I lasted all of 4 minutes before my calves couldn't take the strain anymore, and I was "punished". It was a lot of fun - I really like those sorts of games. :)

(in reply to charlotte12)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Set up to fail - 2/8/2008 10:12:20 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		He once tied me up in a position and then demanded that I do a certain task I was incapable of doing just to see how hard I would try. I kept trying until he stopped me, kissed me, and told me how wonderful I was for not giving up.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to ItalianSMistress)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Set up to fail - 2/9/2008 2:40:20 AM   
ProlificNeeds


Posts: 1061
Joined: 5/19/2007
Status: offline 		In the right context it could be fun play, but for myself I know it could be counter productive if not handled properly. I'm hard enough on myself as it is, if I were made to suffer a sense of failure frequently by someone I cared for it would be pretty rough on my confidence. I don't like feeling as if I am disappointing. If I know it is making my Dominant happy, then I feel successful even if I fail in the specific task.

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 40
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Set up to fail Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.093