RE: Your Status

RE: Your Status (Full Version)

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RedMagic1 -> RE: Your Status (2/16/2008 7:08:26 AM)
Dude, do you have any idea how many female subs read these message boards? And female Dommes (not that you'd evvvvvver be interested in them I'm sure)? You haven't just shot yourself in the foot here -- you've blown one of your nuts clean off. It's time to beat a retreat. Do not fear -- I will do the dirty job of cyberpunishing all the rude unsubs who took time out of their Saturday morning to actually talk with you.

mistoferin -> RE: Your Status (2/16/2008 7:10:27 AM)
You are assuming that those who have not limited their searches are practicing some form of dishonesty. I know that personally I have many friends on here and often their picture will pop up as I am going through emails here, regardless of their relationship status, because they have not limited their searches. I appreciate it when I see them pop up. We usually use the opportunity to say hi to each other and do a bit of catching up. As a matter of fact, that just happened not more than 5 minutes ago.

andrewmac -> RE: Your Status (2/16/2008 7:23:47 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RedMagic1 Dude, do you have any idea how many female subs read these message boards? And female Dommes (not that you'd evvvvvver be interested in them I'm sure)? You haven't just shot yourself in the foot here -- you've blown one of your nuts clean off. It's time to beat a retreat. Do not fear -- I will do the dirty job of cyberpunishing all the rude unsubs who took time out of their Saturday morning to actually talk with you. "Dude"? What is this, "Bill and Ted's Adventure"? Yes, "dude", I am aware that many female subs read the "Ask a Sub" forum, that's the point. The fact that several of the most superficial ones responded is irrelevant.

mistoferin -> RE: Your Status (2/16/2008 7:32:03 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: andrewmac Flagged I'm starting to think that maybe the goal of this thread was to stir the pot. You have had answers to your question, albeit not the answers you seem to have wanted....and yet instead of responding to the "on topic" answers you seem to be taking much pleasure in watching the snowball rolling down the hill and contributing to it's momentum.

softness -> RE: Your Status (2/16/2008 7:35:46 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mistoferin quote: ORIGINAL: andrewmac Flagged I'm starting to think that maybe the goal of this thread was to stir the pot. You have had answers to your question, albeit not the answers you seem to have wanted....and yet instead of responding to the "on topic" answers you seem to be taking much pleasure in watching the snowball rolling down the hill and contributing to it's momentum. ironically the original post I was prepapring was supportive .. along the lines that yes profiles are often misrepresentative, its a shame but that there are good people out there .. and giving him my warmest wishes for a smooth and fruitful search I was ACTUALLY going to be really nice and helpful, amazing how being rude brings out the worst in me, a failing I know, but I am trying to be a good person one ... step ... at .. a .. time

chamberqueen -> RE: Your Status (2/16/2008 7:40:55 AM)
Just to see what would happen, I went back to my profile and removed checks from all boxes except being here for friends. My profile already said no LTR. Since then I have been contacted by both Doms and subs, one of the subs asking for an LTR. The fact is, no matter how carefully you try to construct your profile people will write to you if they want to with their own expectations. You made a valid point to begin with, that people should have a well done profile with the correct boxes checked. As things have gone on this has been the funniest thread I have ever read; I have never laughed aloud so much at what was going on. We all need patience, and to have a good sense of humor.

Kalista07 -> RE: Your Status (2/16/2008 7:44:01 AM)
1. No...It would not annoy or offend me to read that someone is married or otherwise attached...Where i come from we call that honesty....Which is something to be valued..Why would it annoy or offend me that someone has chosen to be honest, open, and upfront about their availability? No, i would not resent the person for "wasting my time" because some of the people i most admire, respect, trust, etc are married, attached, etc. 2. Not really sure what my profile setting are on these days... 3. Yes and no...Yes, my profile reads that i'm in a relationship, but i honestly don't know what my settings are on....Honestly when i read Your op i was going to go change them, and then i saw Your nasty responses and decided to say screw it... i'm not sure the post even applies to me though, because the way i understand it the only profiles that "pop up" on Your screen are the ones that have pictures...And since mine doesn't.... It won't....

eyesopened -> RE: Your Status (2/16/2008 7:52:44 AM)
sigh andrewmac, life seldom gives us exactly what we want when we want it, even Dominants experience that from time to time. How is it a waste of time to read that someone is taken but they show up on one's search? Sub shopping from the convenience of one's home is hardly going to be perfect. A waste of time might be driving 3 hours for a no-show but clicking "next"? Then investing time to "flag" post after post and demand they be removed because once again, it's not something to your liking? Sir, i respectfully submit that you need to look closer at what it really means to invest in or waste time because you could have stepped away from the computer, gotten dressed and attended a fun or relaxing event in the amount of time you have spent in anger, repsonding to text boxes on your computer.

softness -> RE: Your Status (2/16/2008 7:59:04 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: andrewmac This is addressed to female submissives: 1. If you were conducting a search on this site for a single dom who is interested in finding a sub, would it annoy or offend you to see a great many ads start off by saying that the person is married or otherwise not available? Remember, they have deliberately adjusted their profile checklist so that they will show up whenever someone searches for a "Dom seeing a sub"? Would that offend you and make you resent this person for wasting your time? Not really no, they can do what they want I can do what I want. I dont sweat the small stuff, life is too short. 2. If you are just here to make friends and use the forum, not to find a partner, do your profile settings reflect this? My profile was written to reflect what I want in a Dominant, whereever I might find him, the boards, CM, the gym, or Tesco Remember? There is a query drop-down checklist that asks what you are looking for. One of the choices is "Friends Only".....after creating your profile, this option is accessible via "Edit Profile" on the Home page. 3. Have you inserted something into your profile like "I am taken", "I am not looking" or "I am under consideration"? If yes, have you ALSO gone back into the profile settings to change your status? No because I am totally unlovable and no one will have me. If not, why not? Are you aware that your profile is needlessly showing up when a dom searches for available subs, and that you could easily change this?

SensualPassion41 -> RE: Your Status (2/16/2008 7:59:19 AM)
First, you complain that people aren't completing their profiles according to your needs and specifications. You claim your time has been wasted reading them. Secondly, you say you only respond to emails you deem worthy of your response. You just wasted their time. Thirdly, you attempt to decide which post is appropriate for this thread. Last but not least, you act like a child who's feelings were hurt by "flagging" posts. Who are you to decide what is appropriate for another's profile? Who are you to deem someone "unworthy" of response even if it's a no thank you? Profiles of those not with in my search criteria can often be enlighting. I can learn various things, it might be someone I'd like to talk to because we have had similar experiences. If you can't control your own emotions over something so simple, how do you expect any submissive/slave to trust you enough to control her?

kittinSol -> RE: Your Status (2/16/2008 8:01:17 AM)
Look, to be fair, people were perfectly kind and helpful to you, following your original post. It is only after a couple of pages of your nitpicking at everything they said that you became a subject of comic relief. If you don't like this, it is up to you do do some damage limitation. I couldn't be fairer than this.

DiurnalVampire -> RE: Your Status (2/16/2008 8:09:09 AM)
I have not bothered reading the whole thread. At first, I believed it might actually be worthwhile until I realized that the OP, instead of acting like a mature Dominant and reading what he found useful and disregarding the rest, found it necessary to stomp his foot and whine when someone said something that didnt fit what he was looking for. There are quite a few reasons those of us who are involved do not check the JUST LOOKING box only. Reason one is that those boxes are fairly often ignored anyway. I have submissive men, women and trans, switch men and friends only checked. I am STILL often viewed and contacted my Dom men. So, why bother wasting MY time to check off the other boxes when it is obvious that my check list is being ignored? And perhaps these people are still seeking other people. There is nothing specifically saying you must be seeking to find a relationship only. I mentor, and I contact and am contacte by many on my checklist to chat about things and to learn even though I am taken and happy. If you are so important that you dont have 2 minutes to read a profile and see if it might mention someone being taken then perhaps online dating is not for you. It takes time, and if your time is so precious you are going to waste a whole lot more of it picking through the posts on here and whining about them than you are reading a few profiles that dont fit your standards. If you find someone you wish not to come up in your profile search again, hide them. Then you dont waste your time on "repeat offenders". Coming here, whining and bitching about how irrelavent people can be, does not make you look very mature. I cant speak for how dominant or not you might be, but just reading the snippets I have, you certainly dont strike me as mature enough to engender the type of trust needed for control. Could a few more options be helpful for those seeking... absolutely. But rather than optioning people to death and cutting out those who have decided not to bother with checking everything in the world (like the interests list. If you go strictly like that you lose out on so much) why not just read the text that they have provided whcih allows people to tell you what they think is relavent. DV

Mercnbeth -> RE: Your Status (2/16/2008 8:09:55 AM)
quote: 1. If you were conducting a search on this site for a single dom who is interested in finding a sub, would it annoy or offend you to see a great many ads start off by saying that the person is married or otherwise not available? no. this slave isn't annoyed or offended by what other people choose to do that has nothing to do with her. quote: Remember, they have deliberately adjusted their profile checklist so that they will show up whenever someone searches for a "Dom seeing a sub"? Would that offend you and make you resent this person for wasting your time? no. looking for someone has not turned out to be a waste of time for this slave. she has no reason to be offended or resentful toward those folks she was not compatible with, whether we actually met in person or just exchanged a few e-mails. quote: 2. If you are just here to make friends and use the forum, not to find a partner, do your profile settings reflect this? since we joined this site, we have had a shared profile, explicative of what we seek...and still folks send us mail expressing their desire to be Dominated/castrated/etc. by Master's slave. no-where does it state we are looking for that and it is neither annoying or offensive---Master finds it quite humorous, actually, and responds to each one. quote: 3. Have you inserted something into your profile like "I am taken", "I am not looking" or "I am under consideration"? this is taken from our profile, second paragraph: "beth is a slave, owned by me – Merc. she is much too valuable and special to share with just anyone – so don’t ask."

KatyLied -> RE: Your Status (2/16/2008 8:13:38 AM)
Would that offend you and make you resent this person for wasting your time? No. I decide how and with whom I will waste my time. 2. If you are just here to make friends and use the forum, not to find a partner, do your profile settings reflect this? I don't know, haven't checked that in ages. The disclaimer at the heading of my profile is enough. If someone is extraordinary perhaps he can persuade me to change my mind. [;)] If not, why not? Are you aware that your profile is needlessly showing up when a dom searches for available subs, and that you could easily change this? [/quote] Because it's not my job to make life comfortable/easy for strangers. I don't care what shows up when others do searches.

sambamanslilgirl -> RE: Your Status (2/16/2008 8:15:47 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: andrewmac This is addressed to female submissives: 1. If you were conducting a search on this site for a single dom who is interested in finding a sub, would it annoy or offend you to see a great many ads start off by saying that the person is married or otherwise not available? Remember, they have deliberately adjusted their profile checklist so that they will show up whenever someone searches for a "Dom seeing a sub"? i don't get annoyed by ads stating a dominant is married - i simply hide my profile from their view. they aren't wasting my time merely wasting their own trying desperately to chat with me. quote: 2. If you are just here to make friends and use the forum, not to find a partner, do your profile settings reflect this? no it does not and i don't have to reflect that on my profile simply because i chose not to. quote: 3. Have you inserted something into your profile like "I am taken", "I am not looking" or "I am under consideration"? If yes, have you ALSO gone back into the profile settings to change your status? LOL - like that's going to stop dominants like yourself from contacting me and others who are owned, collared etc. it seems those tiny little words doesn't deter unhitched dominants from "stealing" submissives/slaves from their current owners. for example, i had a couple of dominants telling me Daddy wasn't a real Daddy ...that i should leave him for them. another asked me to runaway with him to fulfill my island fantasy. and when we refuse, that's when all of the domly insults start to fly.

Kana -> RE: Your Status (2/16/2008 8:18:25 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: andrewmac This is addressed to female submissives: Why not males submissives? Sexism anyone? 1. If you were conducting a search on this site for a single dom who is interested in finding a sub, would it annoy or offend you to see a great many ads start off by saying that the person is married or otherwise not available? Remember, they have deliberately adjusted their profile checklist so that they will show up whenever someone searches for a "Dom seeing a sub"? So is this about you or them, because after reading the rest of your post it seems as if you are disguising self-seeking in the form of a question? I don't know how long you have been here but most women are getting buried in responses to their profiles. They don't have to spend any time looking at mens. If they do, never once have I heard anyone mention that they are upset at someone "wasting their time." Would that offend you and make you resent this person for wasting your time? The more common complaint that you will hear if you loiter around here for a while before making self -aggrandizing statements is that they would kill for more men to be honest about such things as being married or involved up front.So many time wasters and game players that omit, lie or shade truth are what wastes peoples times, not the five seconds it takes to read a profile. Who are you to judge how or why someone does something, much less attempt to control them over the internet? 2. If you are just here to make friends and use the forum, not to find a partner, do your profile settings reflect this? Why do you give a damn? It's none of you business what others do. Remember? There is a query drop-down checklist that asks what you are looking for. One of the choices is "Friends Only".....after creating your profile, this option is accessible via "Edit Profile" on the Home page. What a denigrating comment. I am fairly sure that people here are pretty damn familiar with how to use this site and set their profiles. Many of the people on these boards have been here for years. How could we ever have existed without your scathing brilliance before? All that has occurred before your arrival was just a warm up for the real thing.Thank you Sir for instructing me in how to set my profile, I don't know what I would have done without you.Maybe, just maybe, others know exactly what they ae doing. have you considered this? 3. Have you inserted something into your profile like "I am taken", "I am not looking" or "I am under consideration"? If yes, have you ALSO gone back into the profile settings to change your status? If not, why not? Are you aware that your profile is needlessly showing up when a dom searches for available subs, and that you could easily change this? And now the real reason for the posting shows up. Its not about a real question, its not about bringing something to the forums that is sincere, its about you, with an agenda having an axe to grind and veiling it in theoretically subtle and condescending posts followed up with hollow threats to tell Mom if things go against what you like. Welcome to the internet my man. It’s none of yours or anyone else’s business why anyone sets up their profile as they wish. If you don’t care for what they do, move along, go play in traffic or something. Trying to get others to change is a useless exercise in tilting at windmills. Fuck man, there are people here who have their reasons for doing what they do, whether their profile "needlessly" (I think its that word that makes me want to respond so vehemently) shows up is up to them. If you don't like it, there is a hide profile button for your use. I suggest you use it. I will mention about now that there are a number of women here whose profiles may say friends only but that’s just to keep the swarms of predators away from their doorstep. They are not averse to getting to know someone on a personal basis and if the attraction develops they would be willing to consider something beyond internet friendship. You presume a lot in this post. You project your feelings of rudeness and laziness on others without cause or justification.It shows little about those who you supposedly are discussing but reveals much about your character to those who have read this.

sensiia -> RE: Your Status (2/16/2008 8:29:53 AM)
Andrewmac you are in Washington DC, why not go to the Black Rose website and www.br.org and find out when and where they have their meetings and meet some people in r/t. I am sure you may meet several single subs and bottoms, maybe even meet someone who can introduce you to a single sub. I have always stated what I looked for and what I didn't desire but you get those who really do not read profiles but see a picture or that they are submissive and WHAM they think automatically you will drop all for them. What it comes down to is you have absolutely no control what another persons says or writes in their profile, deal with it and move on.

KatyLied -> RE: Your Status (2/16/2008 8:35:49 AM)
quote: containing a clear recent head-to-toe photo of you. He expects a picture in the first message, yet doesn't have one of himself on his profile. I wonder how that's working for him.

beargonewild -> RE: Your Status (2/16/2008 8:41:54 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: andrewmac This is addressed to female submissives: 1. If you were conducting a search on this site for a single dom who is interested in finding a sub, would it annoy or offend you to see a great many ads start off by saying that the person is married or otherwise not available? Remember, they have deliberately adjusted their profile checklist so that they will show up whenever someone searches for a "Dom seeing a sub"? Would that offend you and make you resent this person for wasting your time? 2. If you are just here to make friends and use the forum, not to find a partner, do your profile settings reflect this? Remember? There is a query drop-down checklist that asks what you are looking for. One of the choices is "Friends Only".....after creating your profile, this option is accessible via "Edit Profile" on the Home page. 3. Have you inserted something into your profile like "I am taken", "I am not looking" or "I am under consideration"? If yes, have you ALSO gone back into the profile settings to change your status? If not, why not? Are you aware that your profile is needlessly showing up when a dom searches for available subs, and that you could easily change this? I have to wonder if people have gotten so uptight because their profile happens to meet several search parameters as opposed to a minutely specific query? Giving the benefit of the doubt to the members, how they set their status is done according to what they are seeking, even if it is more then one specific thing. It seems to me that there are more important things in life to be concerned/annoyed/irritated about than if a search result shows that person being spoken for? Most people do state somewhere in their profile if they are single, taken, collared, etc. Hopefully we are all adults here and why should I be offended because a person is taken? Yea, so I lost a few minutes because I didn't find what I searched for, whoopie shit. Seems quite idiotic to resent a person because of this. Though what is highly annoying/aggravating is having someone tell me how I should write my profile, especially if I did not solicit their advice.

charmdpetKeira -> RE: Your Status (2/16/2008 8:49:32 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: andrewmac This is addressed to female submissives: 1. If you were conducting a search on this site for a single dom who is interested in finding a sub, would it annoy or offend you to see a great many ads start off by saying that the person is married or otherwise not available? Remember, they have deliberately adjusted their profile checklist so that they will show up whenever someone searches for a "Dom seeing a sub"? I expect nothing from those who contact me, and less from those I choose to contact. People, who show up in a search, don’t even register. I find the ones that eliminate themselves from my search right off, are easiest to deal with. quote: Remember, they have deliberately adjusted their profile checklist so that they will show up whenever someone searches for a "Dom seeing a sub"? How would I know it was deliberate? quote: Would that offend you and make you resent this person for wasting your time? I would find resenting the person more of a waste of time. quote: 3. Have you inserted something into your profile like "I am taken", "I am not looking" or "I am under consideration"? If yes, have you ALSO gone back into the profile settings to change your status? Yes, twice. k

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