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RE: "Love" is a four-letter word - 2/17/2008 3:04:42 PM   
Shawn1066


Posts: 987
Joined: 10/7/2007
Status: offline 		I am in the lifestyle for love.  If I wasn't in love, then it would all be meaningless.

DV's Fox

(in reply to faerytattoodgirl)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: "Love" is a four-letter word - 2/17/2008 3:13:01 PM   
Hippiekinkster


Posts: 5512
Joined: 11/20/2007
From: Liechtenstein
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMia

quote:

ORIGINAL: Loveisallyouneed

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

Playing with someone that I've given my heart to though, gives it a whole other dimension that I can't even come close to describing.


That has been my experience, which is why I wonder why people settle for less.



I feel this way also.
But, to each their own!

I also feel this way. For me, kink is an act of giving, and I cannot give without reservation unless my heart is involved.

(in reply to MzMia)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: "Love" is a four-letter word - 2/17/2008 3:16:56 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		I guess part of why I can do 'casual' play is because I'm more into the SM than the DS..
But again... if I LIKE someone enough to play with them, then they are already in my heart..so maybe, it means that I love them in some manner...
(even if I'd never consider them as a permanent partner)


_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to Hippiekinkster)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: "Love" is a four-letter word - 2/17/2008 3:44:45 PM   
Loveisallyouneed


Posts: 348
Joined: 2/5/2008
From: Ontario, Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

I guess part of why I can do 'casual' play is because I'm more into the SM than the DS..
But again... if I LIKE someone enough to play with them, then they are already in my heart..so maybe, it means that I love them in some manner...
(even if I'd never consider them as a permanent partner)



Funny, it is probably because of the sm side of me that love -has- to be involved on both sides. Quite simply I cannot hurt anyone unless I know her well enough, and love her enough, so as to feel assured her need is sincere and an expression of her love and respect for me.

Giving pain is as intimate an act as giving pleasure, involving at least as much trust, if not moreso.

I just can't do that casually.



(in reply to GreedyTop)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: "Love" is a four-letter word - 2/17/2008 4:29:17 PM   
MzMia


Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline 		Bob, thank you for starting this topic.
I have been known to start similiar ones every now and then.
 
It is time to bring BDSM'ers that only seek "love based/loving" relationships out of the closet!
 

< Message edited by MzMia -- 2/17/2008 4:39:19 PM >

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain


What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to Loveisallyouneed)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: "Love" is a four-letter word - 2/17/2008 5:13:50 PM   
ThinkingKitten


Posts: 447
Joined: 6/15/2006
From: Ontari-ari-o
Status: offline 		Love is like a butterfly....... the harder you chase it, the more elusive it becomes, therefore it's safer to just not even mention it. Try and lull it into a false sense of security ya know? Pretend it's not what you're after, but then spring the trap?

(None of that's ever worked for me BTW.... chasing or ignoring).

_____________________________

Thinking Kitten

If you can't stand the heat... tell the chef to get out of the kitchen.

(in reply to MzMia)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: "Love" is a four-letter word - 2/17/2008 5:23:37 PM   
MzMia


Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ThinkingKitten

Love is like a butterfly....... the harder you chase it, the more elusive it becomes, therefore it's safer to just not even mention it. Try and lull it into a false sense of security ya know? Pretend it's not what you're after, but then spring the trap?

(None of that's ever worked for me BTW.... chasing or ignoring).


I don't think "Love" is something that you normally need to "chase".

Many don't grasp that great close friendships are good building blocks for loving 
relationships.
Why would I want a relationship with someone who could not be bothered to get to know
me, understand me, and trust me, FIRST? 

THAT is how I roll.
Which is probably why I am single.
But I will not settle for less. 

I have been divorced 4 years, my ex-husband is still one of my best friends.
People are usually mystified by the fact we are great friends, I tell them, he was a good friend BEFORE we got married.

< Message edited by MzMia -- 2/17/2008 5:39:32 PM >

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain


What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to ThinkingKitten)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: "Love" is a four-letter word - 2/17/2008 6:59:52 PM   
Loveisallyouneed


Posts: 348
Joined: 2/5/2008
From: Ontario, Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ThinkingKitten

Love is like a butterfly....... the harder you chase it, the more elusive it becomes, therefore it's safer to just not even mention it. Try and lull it into a false sense of security ya know? Pretend it's not what you're after, but then spring the trap?

(None of that's ever worked for me BTW.... chasing or ignoring).


I wonder how many share your pov, TK. It would certainly explain some of the behaviour I've witnessed in some who have responded to my profile.

(in reply to ThinkingKitten)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: "Love" is a four-letter word - 2/17/2008 7:15:00 PM   
batshalom


Posts: 1990
Joined: 9/17/2007
Status: offline 		Hm.

I've found just the opposite of your hypothesis - read the "ask a submissive" forums and you'll find the prevalence of love-related discussions. It would be more difficult for you to inconspicuously hang out with a gaggle of subs in RT, but from my experience I can tell you that love seems to be the reason most women stay with their Doms / Masters.

As for myself, I would not / could not submit to someone I didn't love. It's too personal, too intimate, too intense, but then I am into the D/s dynamic for the relationship and not necessarily for the play.

(in reply to Loveisallyouneed)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: "Love" is a four-letter word - 2/17/2008 7:31:40 PM   
Lumus


Posts: 5968
Joined: 9/16/2007
Status: offline 		Love vs Lust - which one is the Dominant feature?  Or are they both switches?

Meh.  I love first, fuck later.  It's my predilection.  Never fucked my girl, but she's most certainly my girl.  And hopefully, after a year of trying to be together, she'll be up before the end of the month.





_____________________________

<Talk to educate; listen to learn.>

~ the other half of "L&L" ~

I have been dubbed the Rainmaker. Do not make me take your water for my tribe.

(in reply to batshalom)
Profile   Post #: 30
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