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A theory I have... - 2/18/2008 11:09:51 PM   
HerLord


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Status: offline 		I will keep it short... So, pls keep yours applicable to you, and what you think.

All parties in a relationship should be at all times in the though processes of "How do I make _______ look good?"

My Love near consumes her tedious day at work pondering such things. How do/es you/rs?

sorry for the slashers ;(

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RE: A theory I have... - 2/18/2008 11:47:32 PM   
SailingBum


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From: Sailin the stormy sea
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quote:

ORIGINAL: HerLord

I will keep it short... So, pls keep yours applicable to you, and what you think.

All parties in a relationship should be at all times in the though processes of "How do I make _______ look good?"



My girl is a extension of me. Just last week a buddy of mine asked me why I've not been around much.  So I explained there we a number of things I didn't like about her house.  The most recent upgrades were a new front and back porch in the fall.  And I just finished remodeling her kitchen which I never liked.

He said it sounds like she is using me.  I'm like naaa we have been together a long time and she takes excellent care of me.  The other thing I do to make her look good is bruise her up.  That drives me wild looking  at them in the heat of the moment.

BadOne


< Message edited by SailingBum -- 2/18/2008 11:48:42 PM >

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RE: A theory I have... - 2/18/2008 11:48:19 PM   
Leatherist


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quote:

ORIGINAL: HerLord

I will keep it short... So, pls keep yours applicable to you, and what you think.

All parties in a relationship should be at all times in the though processes of "How do I make _______ look good?"

My Love near consumes her tedious day at work pondering such things. How do/es you/rs?

sorry for the slashers ;(


I don't need a lot of external validation. I'd be a mess if I really worried about how I looked.

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RE: A theory I have... - 2/19/2008 12:08:03 AM   
HerLord


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Status: offline 		I would've expect something... else.



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RE: A theory I have... - 2/19/2008 1:14:28 AM   
CuriousLord


Posts: 3911
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Status: offline 		Don't really care about appearances.  Not sure if this is what you're referring to.

Well, besides impressing one professor who may take me on as a research partner.  That's pretty important.

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RE: A theory I have... - 2/19/2008 1:39:20 AM   
BitaTruble


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quote:

ORIGINAL: HerLord

I will keep it short... So, pls keep yours applicable to you, and what you think.

All parties in a relationship should be at all times in the though processes of "How do I make _______ look good?"

My Love near consumes her tedious day at work pondering such things. How do/es you/rs?

sorry for the slashers ;(


I'm not quite sure what you're asking here, but my job isn't to make Himself look good .. it's to obey him. Whether or not he thinks that makes him look good is up to him to decide, not me.

Celeste

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RE: A theory I have... - 2/19/2008 1:39:32 AM   
HerLord


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Status: offline 		Ok...So I get this thread is weak of concept... but It has had me wondering alot about the nature of inter personal relationships. It strikes me deeply to know of how much thought My Love puts into making me Look good, but it's not about the outward appearances. Let me see if I can fix this thread... cuz it obviously needs it, and 2 because it is a subject of great interest to me. I confess I do not spend that much time on Her... But I do not feel I do not put forth an effort. I believe I could summorize it breifly. At the end of the day, no matter how good or bad, I ALWAYS make her smile. Do the "what I do"'s get belittled because I didn't spend weeks planning it? Do the what i do's get overated because i spent 16 hours trying to get connecting flights? What is it in the what you do for who you do it for, that matters most? Is it the fact that I remembered something that you only mentioned once six years ago? Or was it that I had my secretary send you roses on the wrong date for our anniversry? What things is it that our "Ours" do to do more than just make us look good, but feel good looking it.

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RE: A theory I have... - 2/19/2008 1:56:26 AM   
eyesopened


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Status: offline 		i'm also confused by your post.  Is it about 'looking good' or about putting effort into the relationship?

my Master puts a tremendous amount of effort into our relationship, more than i can currently match in fact.  i don't know that it makes me 'look good' but i am overwhelmed by the depth of His love for me and am inspired to serve to that same depth.

While i do not spend my entire day pondering how to make Him look good (i do not have a tedious day) i do know that every decision i make, i make within the framework of our relationship and with a clear view of our future and my role within it.

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RE: A theory I have... - 2/19/2008 2:13:29 AM   
SailingBum


Posts: 3225
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From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline 		Yea what she said.  I'm not feeling the love.  Herlords second post confused me even more.  shurg

BadOne

< Message edited by SailingBum -- 2/19/2008 2:14:43 AM >

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RE: A theory I have... - 2/19/2008 2:19:52 AM   
HerLord


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Status: offline 		This is what I was trying to leave vague enough to illicit peoples own interpretation of it meant to them... But I suck at it. So I tried to fix... Now just hanging head in own confusion.

I think it is about both. Depending on which you think of... You could consider your own dedication to ____, or in turn reference in thought how much does yours spend putting you before them... (even in the Dom, The Dom must know that those who serve, serve best when served best.)(LOL)

Screw it... I am too tired to fix this tonight... Maybe if there shows to be interest I may try to resurect it from the dead tommorrow.

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RE: A theory I have... - 2/19/2008 2:52:31 AM   
Paulsgirl


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quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum

[The other thing I do to make her look good is bruise her up.  That drives me wild looking  at them in the heat of the moment.

BadOne


The best looking bruises are the ones that take a long time to emerge...they start off as red and turn through purple and then to black...as they fade they go through all the shads of green and finally to a yellowish fade....they are the prettiest ones.......


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RE: A theory I have... - 2/19/2008 3:10:27 AM   
colouredin


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Status: offline 		Hmm Im not quite sure how you mean look good. I do know that Sir highly values his reputation and so in public f and I behave differantly to private so that his reputation is kept in tact, thats a rather conscious thing that we do. But i dont know if thats what you mean?? I do know that in relationships I dont like to feel like I am the only one making any effort, Your comment about connecting flights and stuff, I do remember meeting one Dom, it had cost me a huge amount to get there and I had bought new clothes etc and when I got there he hadnt even cleaned his front room. Although sometimes minimum effort can be used to make the other feel happy and smile such as a little pat on the head from Sir if i felt like he wasnt putting anything of himself into the relationship I know it wouldnt last at all. Although as a submissive my primary goal to to make Sir happy and do what pleases him on a basic human level he has to be worth the effort doesnt he? I dont know if i totally missed the point because the op's posts were very difficult to read/understand. 

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RE: A theory I have... - 2/19/2008 4:01:12 AM   
TreasureKY


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From: Kentucky
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quote:

ORIGINAL: HerLord

All parties in a relationship should be at all times in the though processes of "How do I make _______ look good?"


Actually, I understand perfectly what you are trying to say here.  While I don't think I would have used quite the wording you have, I certainly agree with the context... at least in so far as how I relate to Firmhand.  I'm not so sure that I'd say Firm's position is quite the same, though I'd imagine in his own way he feels somewhat similar.

I take great pride in being a supporting force in Firmhand's life.  That includes supporting not only his personal goals and ambitions, but reinforcing how it is that he wishes to be perceived by others when that concerns him. 

For example, later this month I will be attending a business convention with him in Las Vegas... my job will be to provide for his pleasure and comfort during those times when he is not engaged in his work.  However, I will also be with him at times when he is networking with clients and others who have potential to be clients.  It is important to me that my presence supports any business goals that he has, which includes how those individuals perceive Firm.

While Firm does not need me in order to "look good" to others, my appearance and demeanor do have an impact on other's opinions of him.  It's important to me that my presence serves to bolster whatever image it is that he desires to project at any given time.

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RE: A theory I have... - 2/19/2008 4:17:16 AM   
StormsSlave


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Joined: 2/6/2008
Status: offline 		Hi, all. This is a really huge misunderstanding.  My Lord has requested that I, the household scribe, try to make it right.

My Lord and I speak our own kind of language, as I'm sure is true in all households.  I'm able to read this and understand his meaning.  Unfortunately for others, it requires a bit of translation. 

Sailing Bum kinda got it.

His question should have been read as this:  Shouldn't it be the aspiration of all parties in a relationship to edify and build up one another?  For instance, I had been gifted my first digital camera by my best friend.  My daughter, having inherited my clumsy gene, dropped it and broke it.  I was heartbroken.  I actually cried, a lot, which I don't much do. 

The first available spending money that came into My Lord's hands, months later, he went to buy me the very same camera.  Needless to say, I cried again.  So, the point being, in his priorities over all of that time, probably four months, his first thought was to make me smile. 

He's right in saying that I've spent entire days thinking of him.  I won't go into the details, and trust me, I make a lot of mistakes, but I'm usually trying to make him feel good and make him smile.

He's wondering how that works for you?  Do you spend your energy and thought building each other up, or no?  What do you do? 

I hope this helps.

Cheers

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RE: A theory I have... - 2/19/2008 4:18:58 AM   
StormsSlave


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Status: offline 		TreasureKY:  EXACTLY!!

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RE: A theory I have... - 2/19/2008 4:21:41 AM   
HerLord


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Joined: 2/14/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: StormsSlave

Hi, all. This is a really huge misunderstanding.  My Lord has requested that I, the household scribe, try to make it right.

My Lord and I speak our own kind of language, as I'm sure is true in all households.  I'm able to read this and understand his meaning.  Unfortunately for others, it requires a bit of translation. 

Sailing Bum kinda got it.

His question should have been read as this:  Shouldn't it be the aspiration of all parties in a relationship to edify and build up one another?  For instance, I had been gifted my first digital camera by my best friend.  My daughter, having inherited my clumsy gene, dropped it and broke it.  I was heartbroken.  I actually cried, a lot, which I don't much do. 

The first available spending money that came into My Lord's hands, months later, he went to buy me the very same camera.  Needless to say, I cried again.  So, the point being, in his priorities over all of that time, probably four months, his first thought was to make me smile. 

He's right in saying that I've spent entire days thinking of him.  I won't go into the details, and trust me, I make a lot of mistakes, but I'm usually trying to make him feel good and make him smile.

He's wondering how that works for you?  Do you spend your energy and thought building each other up, or no?  What do you do? 

I hope this helps.

Cheers


A perfect example.

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RE: A theory I have... - 2/19/2008 4:45:05 AM   
SailingBum


Posts: 3225
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From: Sailin the stormy sea
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Paulsgirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum

[The other thing I do to make her look good is bruise her up.  That drives me wild looking  at them in the heat of the moment.

BadOne


The best looking bruises are the ones that take a long time to emerge...they start off as red and turn through purple and then to black...as they fade they go through all the shads of green and finally to a yellowish fade....they are the prettiest ones.......



yep yep and yep  I really enjoi when my slave tells me she is sore 3 days later.

BadOne

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The beatings will continue until morale improves.

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RE: A theory I have... - 2/19/2008 4:49:25 AM   
SailingBum


Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline 		Stormslave

That was my point by doing all those improvements on her home I was taking care of her.  In much the same way she shows her love for me.

BadOne

_____________________________

The beatings will continue until morale improves.

According to SwithNSpanky
We are all so very lucky to have you with us to impart your great wisdom.

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RE: A theory I have... - 2/19/2008 4:59:54 AM   
Bound2One


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quote:

ORIGINAL: StormsSlave

He's wondering how that works for you?  Do you spend your energy and thought building each other up, or no?  What do you do? 

I hope this helps.

Cheers


Thank you for the edification!

We definitely spend mental energy building one another up.  Ours is a newer relationship, and Master has steered it in such a way that I feel safe with him and safe enough to start sharing the 'deeper, darker' stuff that needs to be shared to bring the relationship to the next level.  I know he's spent time building this bond with me rather deliberately, making sure certain areas of trust are estsablished, etc..  I tend to skip along in life in reactive mode, not noticing the work that we're doing within our relationship until suddenly I realize I am incredibly at ease with this person and that due to that can share on a more intimate level.  It's kinda cool how that works.  :-) 

I show my support of him in tangible ways, offers of assistance, listening to (business-type) problems, being a sounding board when he wishes it and propping him up mentally when need be. 

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RE: A theory I have... - 2/19/2008 5:05:16 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		Daddy looks handsome 24/7 without my help - i don't need to be in that thought process to boost His ego.  all i have to do is be my sweet, obedient daughter self - that's how i make mine look handsome.




< Message edited by sambamanslilgirl -- 2/19/2008 5:08:49 AM >

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