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CUMMING - 9/17/2005 12:04:50 AM

lilliebitch

Posts: 29
Joined: 9/16/2005
Status: offline

ok i might sound like a real dick but hey i gotta know, does anyone else have trouble cumming from pentraion, i seem to be able only to cum with clit stimulation, i enjoy penetration but cant go over the edge, Mistress has ordered me to learn so does anyone have any tips, please help my clit is of limits now

Post #: 1

RE: CUMMING - 9/17/2005 12:12:21 AM

raoul666

Posts: 1
Joined: 9/16/2005
Status: offline

well it can be a bit hard you just have to keep going and going doing penitration but also doing clit then ull cum

(in reply to lilliebitch)

Post #: 2

RE: CUMMING - 9/17/2005 12:16:28 AM

frenchpet

Posts: 587
Joined: 8/19/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: lilliebitch

ok i might sound like a real dick but hey i gotta know, does anyone else have trouble coming from penetration, i seem to be able only to cum with clit stimulation, i enjoy penetration but cant go over the edge, Mistress has ordered me to learn so does anyone have any tips, please help my clit is of limits now

She has ordered you to come from a stimulation that doesn't bring you to orgasm ? wow. From what I remember of the Hite's report, it's very common to have orgasms only from clit stimulation. If you want to know the statistics about it, I'll go and have a look, but that won't help you much. When I'm penetrating a Woman who doesn't come because of penetration, I either stimulate her clit manually at the same time or encourage her to do so.

(in reply to lilliebitch)

Post #: 3

RE: CUMMING - 9/17/2005 12:47:36 AM

EmeraldSlave2

Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Wow. A majority of women are unable to orgasm except with clitorial stimulation.

Do a search on orgasms and you will tons of topics- trust me, you are far from alone in being difficult to orgasm and I find it odd that your dom would simply tell you to do something like that without any guidance or understanding?

(in reply to lilliebitch)

Post #: 4

RE: CUMMING - 9/17/2005 1:05:04 AM

NakedOnMyChain

Posts: 2431
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: Indiana
Status: offline

I have never come from penetration. I come easily from clitoral stimulation. In the reading I have done on the topic I have learned that this is the norm. Most women have the same tendencies, and it is very difficult or impossible for them to come by penetration alone.

_____________________________

"Oh, it's torture, but I'm almost there."
~The Cure

"I ask for so little. Just fear me, love me, do as I say, and I will be your slave."
~The Labyrinth

(in reply to lilliebitch)

Post #: 5

RE: CUMMING - 9/17/2005 3:38:24 AM

sweetpettjenny

Posts: 674
Joined: 11/7/2004
Status: offline

the only time i cum from penetration is :
1: when im fisted
2: when my clit is stimulated with penetration.( although getting a hood piercing helps the cumming along greatly, sometimes with just penetration)
Maybe you can research a possible piercing. I was trained to squirt by clitoral stimulation. Sometimes it just takes relaxation and training.

(in reply to lilliebitch)

Post #: 6

RE: CUMMING - 9/17/2005 9:27:31 AM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

Also, the more tense you are about cumming from penetration, the harder it will be to acheive. So, by putting that pressure on you, she has pretty much gauranteed that you will concentrate on it during sex, and thus won't be able to acheive it.

With my ex-gf we found success when she focused all of her awareness on the sensations that were happening, rather than focusing on the end goal.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to sweetpettjenny)

Post #: 7

RE: CUMMING - 9/17/2005 9:31:23 AM

littleone35

Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline

My late master had a move whew his pelvice bone stimulated my clit while he was pentrating me. Maybe you can expirement wilt different positions it always made me cum. Good luck.

littleone

(in reply to lilliebitch)

Post #: 8

RE: CUMMING - 9/17/2005 9:47:17 AM

Dracironsgirl

Posts: 175
Joined: 7/2/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: lilliebitch

ok i might sound like a real dick but hey i gotta know, does anyone else have trouble cumming from pentraion, i seem to be able only to cum with clit stimulation, i enjoy penetration but cant go over the edge,

i thought i was the only one with that problem, really i did.... i cant cum from penitration either.

_____________________________

~love a Man in control~

(in reply to lilliebitch)

Post #: 9

RE: CUMMING - 9/17/2005 10:57:39 AM

BLKSIRESwench

Posts: 16
Joined: 8/15/2005
Status: offline

i agree with the other posters, cumming with no clitoral stimulation is not easy for most women. i can climax during penetration, but only if i've already had one orgasm from direct clit stimulation. Then, in missionary position, if He pushes His pelvic area into mine and keeps a steady pressure, i can gyrate up against Him and climax during penetration. Just last weekend, i had my first orgasm during penetration without climaxing just before that -- but that was after an entire weekend of teasing and some direct clit stimulation just before penetration.

My point is this, IF it can be achieved (and i believe some of it is physiology), it requires patience and training. Simply saying "do it" seems counterproductive.

(in reply to Dracironsgirl)

Post #: 10

RE: CUMMING - 9/17/2005 11:01:05 AM

frenchpet

Posts: 587
Joined: 8/19/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dracironsgirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: lilliebitch

ok i might sound like a real dick but hey i gotta know, does anyone else have trouble cumming from pentraion, i seem to be able only to cum with clit stimulation, i enjoy penetration but cant go over the edge,

i thought i was the only one with that problem, really i did.... i cant cum from penetration either.

OMG ! Don't Women talk about sex in America !?
I thought there were just a bunch of male chauvinists (for those learning french, "chauviniste" only means jingoistic ;) ) to believe that penetration is the highway to orgasm, or that sex could be limited to penetration.

Here are some figures from the chapter about orgasm and coitus, in the new Hite report (I have the french version, questions are re-translated) :

Have never had any orgasm : 12%
Have never practised coitus : 3%

Among the women who have orgasms and who practise coitus :
Regularly have orgasms from coitus : 30%
Seldom have orgasms from coitus : 22%
Have orgasms during coitus with manual stimulation : 19%
Have no orgasm from coitus : 29%

So as you see, you're part of the 48% of women (who have had coitus and orgasms) who don't have orgasms just from coitus. Not quite rare enough to be in a freak show ;).

My personal point of view... well if my partner doesn't orgasm easily, I really do all I can to make her orgasm, searching what makes her come, and doing it as long as it takes. It which can be exhausting in some extreme cases... but what a reward ! :)
And the very last thing I would do is putting pressure on a partner who doesn't orgasm easily. I don't advise you to "try hard" at all.
But that's just me, and I'm a guy...

< Message edited by frenchpet -- 9/17/2005 11:02:24 AM >

(in reply to Dracironsgirl)

Post #: 11

RE: CUMMING - 9/17/2005 11:17:47 AM

frenchpet

Posts: 587
Joined: 8/19/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BLKSIRESwench
i agree with the other posters, cumming with no clitoral stimulation is not easy for most women. i can climax during penetration, but only if i've already had one orgasm from direct clit stimulation. Then, in missionary position, if He pushes His pelvic area into mine and keeps a steady pressure, i can gyrate up against Him and climax during penetration. Just last weekend, i had my first orgasm during penetration without climaxing just before that -- but that was after an entire weekend of teasing and some direct clit stimulation just before penetration.

OMG ! Don't tell me the missionary position is still the norm ! I thought my grand parents and the Quakers were the last persons alive to believe this ! It's the position that gives the least orgasms. In this position, the gyration of the pelvic area helps, as well as stimulating the labia going back and forth.

(in reply to BLKSIRESwench)

Post #: 12

RE: CUMMING - 9/17/2005 12:14:28 PM

reggae2

Posts: 4
Joined: 7/9/2005
Status: offline

There is a relationship between cumming from penetration and the lenght/thickness of the dick/diddo/vibrator. I hope this help

(in reply to lilliebitch)

Post #: 13

RE: CUMMING - 9/17/2005 12:33:46 PM

Lordandmaster

Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline

Laughing...do you have any scientific evidence for that? Because no one else does.

(in reply to reggae2)

Post #: 14

RE: CUMMING - 9/17/2005 12:48:54 PM

frenchpet

Posts: 587
Joined: 8/19/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

Laughing...do you have any scientific evidence for that? Because no one else does.

I'm quite confident one could find evidence that a too large cock / dildo / vibrator / carrot / other (please don't specify) is more likely to hurt and therefore hinder orgasm. Maybe that is the relationship reggae2 was talking about.

< Message edited by frenchpet -- 9/17/2005 12:50:50 PM >

(in reply to Lordandmaster)

Post #: 15

RE: CUMMING - 9/17/2005 1:18:02 PM

cinnfulhussy

Posts: 135
Joined: 1/30/2005
Status: offline

My first orgasm was via penetration. I did it myself. I did not discover my clit until much later.

I still had a hard time having an orgasm with a man penetrating, for many years. I have always known that many women have difficulty orgasming from penetration, but I do think a lot of it is mental. Obviously not all. I say this because the mind is so powerful. If my mind is not in the right place, I don't care how perfect your penis is, or how good a lover you are, I am not going to achieve orgasm. If I can get my mind in the right place, I just might orgasm several times. I place the burdon on me, for the most part. I control my mind and my thoughts, so if I want to orgasm, then I need to find that happy spot. I have always had a fantasy about being able to orgasm without traditional stimulation. I did not *think* it was possible. I did not think it was possible to orgasm from anal sex, either, without other stimulation. I was wrong. That was a pleasant surprise that started to change the way I thought about the orgasm. I decided to try experimenting with orgasaming without any sort of vaginal, clitoral, or anal stimulation. As I learned more about my body, I found that I really eroticized nipple stimulation and pain. So I would inflict pain on my nipples, masturbate and fantasize. One evening, after practicing a lot of nipple stimulation etc, I noticed that I was *really* aroused. So I closed my eyes, kept up with the stimulation and fantasizing, moved my hips, and..... came. It wasnt the strongest or most satisfying orgasm, but by golly it was one. Since then, I've done this several times. I now know that is IS possible. It was in my head, holding me back, that kept me from previously doing it. Its not possible, don't try.
I suspect there is still minimal stimulation in the vaginal area, bit it comes from inside, not an external force. The mind really is a powerful tool. I now think that it *is* possible (for me) to orgasm from say, a caning. IF my mind is in the right spot, the moons are aligned, etc. I might not ever get to experience it, but I do think that I *could*.
So, yes I think a lot of our ability to orgasm or not, is in the head. I do not think that it *all* is, or that everyone can all orgasm the same way from the same things. I also don't think that anyone should feel "less" for any reason because she cannot achieve orgasm a particular way, or "more" because she can.
Whatever the change in orgasm pattern or ability desired, it typically isn't going to happen overnight. It will probably require mental re-condidtioning, and lots of positive support, and NO FREAKIN' PRESSURE! The more pressured to perform a certain way sexually, the harder it will typically be to get one's mind in the place it needs to be to complete the task. I know with my personal experiece, pressure like that will make me shut down. No orgasm period.
Talk about a mind ****....... and not a particularly good one.

(in reply to frenchpet)

Post #: 16

RE: CUMMING - 9/17/2005 1:22:29 PM

Hallittlelolita

Posts: 253
Joined: 8/11/2005
Status: offline

you are not the only one with that problem so you are not alone

Sincerely andie and her Master Hal

quote:

ORIGINAL: lilliebitch

ok i might sound like a real dick but hey i gotta know, does anyone else have trouble cumming from pentraion, i seem to be able only to cum with clit stimulation, i enjoy penetration but cant go over the edge, Mistress has ordered me to learn so does anyone have any tips, please help my clit is of limits now

(in reply to lilliebitch)

Post #: 17

RE: CUMMING - 9/17/2005 2:48:03 PM

Lordandmaster

Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline

Yes, good call. A 47-inch penis is unlikely to elicit an orgasm in a (human) female.

But elephants, on the other hand...

quote:

ORIGINAL: frenchpet

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

Laughing...do you have any scientific evidence for that? Because no one else does.

I'm quite confident one could find evidence that a too large cock / dildo / vibrator / carrot / other (please don't specify) is more likely to hurt and therefore hinder orgasm. Maybe that is the relationship reggae2 was talking about.

(in reply to frenchpet)

Post #: 18

RE: CUMMING - 9/17/2005 2:56:36 PM

frenchpet

Posts: 587
Joined: 8/19/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: cinnfulhussy
If my mind is not in the right place, I don't care how perfect your penis is, or how good a lover you are, I am not going to achieve orgasm.

But a good lover learns to comfort his partner when she's upset... and wait a better time for sex.

quote:

ORIGINAL: cinnfulhussy
That was a pleasant surprise that started to change the way I thought about the orgasm. I decided to try experimenting with orgasming without any sort of vaginal, clitoral, or anal stimulation.

In other words, type IV masturbation, just moving yourthighs. Is that it ?
I tried to start a silly poll about this subject, but nobody answered :'(.

Actually, for some women it's possible to orgasm even without touching the nipples, although it helps...

quote:

ORIGINAL: cinnfulhussy
The more pressured to perform a certain way sexually, the harder it will typically be to get one's mind in the place it needs to be to complete the task.

And apparently that even made the OP feel guilty about it !!

(in reply to cinnfulhussy)

Post #: 19

RE: CUMMING - 9/17/2005 3:17:37 PM

cinnfulhussy

Posts: 135
Joined: 1/30/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: frenchpet

quote:

ORIGINAL: cinfulhussy
If my mind is not in the right place, I don't care how perfect your penis is, or how good a lover you are, I am not going to achieve orgasm.

But a good lover learns to comfort his partner when she's upset... and wait a better time for sex.

Eh. Its not even being about upset. This is a .... sticky topic. I do not think that a Master, who is desirous of being pleased should *have* to worry about my orgasm, have to wait to have sex. Its really not about being upset, though that would certainly keep me from getting to my happy place. There are any number of reasons that I might not initially be in the mood. My point is that at this stage, the sex is more mental than physical. If *I* can't get my mind where it needs to be, with or without a partner's help, no amout of technical proficience is going to work. Not that I think sex should be all about my personal orgasm....

quote:

ORIGINAL: cinnfulhussy
That was a pleasant surprise that started to change the way I thought about the orgasm. I decided to try experimenting with orgasming without any sort of vaginal, clitoral, or anal stimulation.

In other words, type IV masturbation, just moving yourthighs. Is that it ?
I tried to start a silly poll about this subject, but nobody answered :'(.

No, I don't rub my thighs together, in fact they are not touching at all. I can see how rubbing the thighs together might stimulate the clitoris, though. Not to get too... graphic, but my best success with this was kind of doggy style with legs and knees apart.

quote:

ORIGINAL: cinnfulhussy
The more pressured to perform a certain way sexually, the harder it will typically be to get one's mind in the place it needs to be to complete the task.

And apparently that even made the OP feel guilty about it !!

Yes. I have felt very guilty before for not being able to orgasm on command, or at the drop of a hat. It took time, patience and understanding to rectify that. I'd like if no one else had to go through that, though it was certainly a learning experience for everyone involved.

(in reply to frenchpet)

Post #: 20

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