RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places?

RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (Full Version)

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sambamanslilgirl -> RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (2/25/2008 5:41:10 AM)
i wear my collars, ankle chains, and other "jewelry" in public all of the time. those in the know automatically recognize its menaing (especially drummers and a few bassists) meanwhile those not in the know - usually compliment me on my "jewelry". for example, i can get two different reactions to my leather collar ...it's either "nice collar ...your Owner/Dominant has good taste..." or "...cool necklace..."

juliaoceania -> RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (2/25/2008 7:47:54 AM)
quote: Most of the submissives I've have relationships with over the years never gave such an indication until I asked "So, what's your wildest fantasy or similar?" on a vanilla date. If she replied, "Nothing weird", I knew that was my last date with her. If someone I was out with on a vanilla date with asked me such a question he would get a throw-a-way answer too. Those women who said "nothing weird" may have been afraid to confide their kinky wild side with a virtual stranger on a vanilla date. Vanilla men are often either uptight sexually or they often have a madonna whore complex. I wouldn't share my kinky interests until I knew someone well enough to want to have sex with them.

LadyLynx -> RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (2/25/2008 8:31:34 AM)
julia, that was my reaction to that. (though sometimes I have given up a neutral fantasy, (like wearing a clitoral vibe to a movie and giving it to my date to turn on and off. The word obey is a bad word to some people, and should be avoided on a vanilla date. I think saying, in a soft but compelling voice,"Shhhh.close your eyes" and massaging her head. concentrating on making it as sensual as possible works for most women Ms.Vampirella, I hope you keep us updated..........hmm started a fantasy idea in my head grins

ThunderRoad -> RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (2/25/2008 8:36:57 AM)
Invite her home. Watch Secretary. If she squirms while smiling, then you know. If she squirms while grumpy, you probably don;t need a second date :)

OmegaG -> RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (2/25/2008 8:48:42 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Jeffff I have something that seems to work. It requires an actual date however. On the first or sencond kiss, I take her hair firmly in my hand not a yank but a frim grip. That seems to lead to 3 responses. "Don't do THAT!!: " I don't like that much........but....." and finaly, "mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm" repsonse 2 or 3 may be a winner..:) Jeff Damn, Jeff, how much time could have been saved if only I'd dated you when I was 19.

carlie310 -> RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (2/25/2008 12:48:13 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Jeffff I have something that seems to work. It requires an actual date however. On the first or sencond kiss, I take her hair firmly in my hand not a yank but a frim grip. That seems to lead to 3 responses. "Don't do THAT!!: " I don't like that much........but....." and finaly, "mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm" repsonse 2 or 3 may be a winner..:) Jeff grins. . .

twistedtight1 -> RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (2/26/2008 6:54:48 AM)
greetings and good snowy morning...wishing that the groundhog was right...at a public vanilla function i had a Dominant male approach me and say "Hey i know what your necklace means"..it is the bdsm symbol i wear around my neck in plain view...as in my pic..its more definate then the handcuff pin...try it out...smiles always twist

SireKane -> RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (2/26/2008 10:33:24 AM)
I meet far more attractive submissive females at vanilla bars and Gentlemens clubs than I do on these so-called bdsm lifestyle sites. I do it the old fashion way, with conversation. It's my opinion that women are on these bdsm websites for a multitude of reasons, meeting someone in person is somewhere on the totem pole, but it is rarely a top priority. I suggest you put a profile on some of the vanilla personals site. The women on those sites are there to meet men for real. Be tactful in wording your profile, and be prepared to meet.

ta2dqt -> RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (3/21/2008 2:26:55 PM)
I know I once commented on a lady's purse before....... because the "handles" where actual hand cuffs!! :) Also....... maybe you can have a mini "Flogger" as a key chain hanging off your belt loop?....... go around the store...."playing" w/it while walking around?....... put one on your purse..............??

cjan -> RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (3/21/2008 3:23:54 PM)
I have found that many Catholic girls, who have gone to all girl Catholic schools , often grow up liking to do b-b-b-bad b-b-b-bad things.

MasterDarell -> RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (3/21/2008 4:12:44 PM)
I don't think there are any difinitive absolute qualities that can mark someone as submissive in a vanilla situation....unless of course they have "i'm a sub" written on their forheard. I was once waitingin line at a grocery store behind a pretty young and very vanilla girl. It was a hot day andfor a few seconds she jokingly stuck out her tounge andpanted. I playfully asked her if she was a dog, expecting this young woman to roll her eyes. Instead she turned to mean said, "i will be for you baby".

Tristan -> RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (3/21/2008 4:22:34 PM)
I generally look for a good intellectual and emotional fit with any potential dating / sexual partner, and the D/s always seems to follow. It might take a while sometimes to develop, but it always has developed.

savannastorm -> RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (4/21/2008 2:11:27 PM)
i came accross this forum quite accidently. my question as a sub is, how does one find a Dom, in a vanilla enviornment? lol.. its the same all round not so? I walke the malls and the streets, looking at the men, and wondering, is he a Dom? is he not? its a tough world this one.

MadameXTC -> RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (4/21/2008 6:24:00 PM)
hahaha I pick up on things, so I guess I should have been at the mall. Then again I also pick up alot on body language and am generally right most of the time. I saw a guy one time wearing a cuff pin and I smiled and told him I liked his pin to see what kind of reaction I got. Of course it was at a sci fi convention, but I like to check out the whole person.. Now if you ask me what color his eyes were I could never tell you. I have a bad habit of not looking people in the eyes. I also apologize way to much for things I shouldn't and I try to be nice to everyone I come in contact with in public. So think someone met me somewhere and knew I was submissive? It happened... I went to lunch with a few of my male friends when I was in the military and one guy was playfully flirting with me and pulled my hair. I have no idea why he did that but he got a definate submissive response. Needless to say we were in a vanilla environment and found out we each had BDSM in common. funny but true.. of course it never lasted between us, but it does happen

Leatherist -> RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (4/21/2008 7:02:05 PM)
It's too subtle, You need to wear an oversized black leather filson hat that says REAL LIFE DOM on the browband spelled out in silver spots.

midgetmafiosa -> RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (4/21/2008 7:11:37 PM)
ok, cuff man...if you tried chatting me up, i would just think you were creepy. even if you were exceptionally attractive. it's just too random. and the cuff pin would just seem like a fashion mistake to me. i'm also with jefff. pull my hair on a date if you want to know what i'm into. bite my lip. just try something interesting and a bit out of the ordinary for "vanilla" girls. but yeah, just get a date first.

khem -> RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (4/21/2008 7:36:49 PM)
I've been around strangers that were very obviously in the lifestyle and not said anything. I guess it's just a matter of not really wanting to speak in public about such things. I have wanted to say "nice collar" a few times though. (And yes, it was definitely that kind of collar)

ultsub -> RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (4/21/2008 7:54:55 PM)
I know several individuals in law enforcement who wear that type of pin on their lapel. Perhaps you're sending a mixed message.

Lynnxz -> RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (4/21/2008 8:00:32 PM)
I'm with Midget- get a date first. I'd be a little put off if someone randomly walked up to me while I'm trying to buy mac&cheese and asked if I was a submissive.... Actually, it DID happen once while I was at BK... I stupidly left a collar on my dashboard as I was going through the drive thru, and the guy kept going on and on about how he was Master so and so, and would like to meet me sometime to see if I was a match for him.... Leave me alone! I just want my fries. :(

midgetmafiosa -> RE: Finding Submissive Women at vanilla public places? (4/21/2008 8:03:52 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Lynnxz I'm with Midget- get a date first. I'd be a little put off if someone randomly walked up to me while I'm trying to buy mac&cheese and asked if I was a submissive.... Actually, it DID happen once while I was at BK... I stupidly left a collar on my dashboard as I was going through the drive thru, and the guy kept going on and on about how he was Master so and so, and would like to meet me sometime to see if I was a match for him.... Leave me alone! I just want my fries. :( ick! the things we go through for value meals!

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