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Deeply puzzled,seek some advice - 2/23/2008 10:24:13 PM   
MrRandallspe


Posts: 110
Joined: 1/1/2008
Status: offline 		This is an open question for female subs and slaves.
I have been here almost two months and I admit I am puzzled as to what does it take from a Dom or Master to entice a possible sub/slave to want to communicate  to the level where she feels contented enought to want to be under consideration by him?
I am not new at being a Master,yet I am deeply puzzled by the weak results I have gotten here. I am open to any solid help from any of you.Please,be respectful when you respond...I am asking politely.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Deeply puzzled,seek some advice - 2/23/2008 10:27:09 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Observe the ones in solid long term relationships and compare what they do vs what you do.  Ask them specifically for pointers if necessary.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to MrRandallspe)
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RE: Deeply puzzled,seek some advice - 2/23/2008 10:30:51 PM   
Bound2One


Posts: 614
Joined: 1/11/2008
Status: offline 		My advice is for you to be friendly, polite and honest.  Chat and get to know the person as an individual, not as a submissive/slave.  Share parts of yourself with her.  Let her ask questions and get to know you also.  I'm not sure what you mean by receiving 'weak responses'.  These things take time, and if you're responding to a profile with respect, in a personal manner, with those who are seeking what you are (within their own parameters), you should begin to have conversations. 

I'm wondering at what point you lose contact with them because you ask how to entice someone to communicate up to the point where they wish to be 'under consideration'.  Perhaps you have no problem initially, but something is lost in the process of getting to know one another?

< Message edited by Bound2One -- 2/23/2008 10:34:01 PM >

(in reply to MrRandallspe)
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RE: Deeply puzzled,seek some advice - 2/23/2008 10:31:04 PM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		Or you could try sending a cock pic.  That can sometimes elicit a reaction.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Deeply puzzled,seek some advice - 2/23/2008 10:32:55 PM   
MrRandallspe


Posts: 110
Joined: 1/1/2008
Status: offline 		I am well versed in what to do in a relationship.
I am asking what does it take to get responses here on collarme.
I have had several wonderful real time relationships in the past. I am seeking someone from here on collarme.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Deeply puzzled,seek some advice - 2/23/2008 10:34:32 PM   
MrRandallspe


Posts: 110
Joined: 1/1/2008
Status: offline 		That is NOT my style and if you read many posts from females,you will know that they do not desires pics of this type.

(in reply to Lordandmaster)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Deeply puzzled,seek some advice - 2/23/2008 10:39:09 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline 		You've only been here two months - be more a lot more patient. Listen to LA's point about long-term relationships. There are couples on this site that met here that are in solid, long-term relationships. They can provide a lot of information for you. Also, be active on the forums and learn LaM is a joker. Don't take the cock shot jokes so seriously.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to MrRandallspe)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Deeply puzzled,seek some advice - 2/23/2008 10:43:26 PM   
MrRandallspe


Posts: 110
Joined: 1/1/2008
Status: offline 		When I send a message to each sub or slave profile that I read,yes,I make sure that I fall with-in what they are seeking, I am polite,make comments as to what things that we share interests in and show an interest in them as a person. I am not rude nor crude nor do I sent them a cock pic. Yet,I rarely get a response from them. The ones I do get a response from,we have enjoyed meaningful talks.However,for every 25 messages I send to a different possible sub/slave, I get just 1 or 2 responses and have yet to have any possible "under consideration". 

(in reply to Bound2One)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Deeply puzzled,seek some advice - 2/23/2008 10:50:36 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline 		Sounds pretty normal for a dating site honestly. Just keep trying and don't give up. You really haven't been here long at all and you've already had some meaningful talks - you are ahead of the game for a lot of the doms who post the "how can I get subs to talk to me" threads.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to MrRandallspe)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Deeply puzzled,seek some advice - 2/23/2008 10:52:21 PM   
MrRandallspe


Posts: 110
Joined: 1/1/2008
Status: offline 		I have been involved in this life style for 30 years so I know well what to do in a relationship in real life. I am seeking advice on how to better my response rate here. 

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Deeply puzzled,seek some advice - 2/23/2008 10:55:49 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MrRandallspe

I have been involved in this life style for 30 years so I know well what to do in a relationship in real life. I am seeking advice on how to better my response rate here. 


And you're getting it, though not listening. There isn't a formula except to be patient - really patient. As in "This might take years" patient. You have been here two measely months! It took three years for Valyraen and I to get together, two months is nothing. 

I didn't say anything about your relationships in real life - just that you really shouldn't ignore the advice of listening to those who have met up and formed successful relationships off CM. They did something that, as you said, you want to know how to do.

Edited for typos

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 2/23/2008 11:09:02 PM >

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to MrRandallspe)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Deeply puzzled,seek some advice - 2/23/2008 10:57:40 PM   
girlygurl


Posts: 6973
Joined: 8/5/2007
From: in the palms of His hands
Status: offline 		I really believe it just takes time OP. Good luck.


girly

_____________________________

i see You

happily forever one

(in reply to MrRandallspe)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Deeply puzzled,seek some advice - 2/23/2008 11:04:27 PM   
MrRandallspe


Posts: 110
Joined: 1/1/2008
Status: offline 		Hummm,,ok, I will sit back and keep searching for the one who will respond to my message, take my time and wait for one to be interested enough in what I have to say.

Thank you all and I will take your advice in the polite way it was given. 

(in reply to girlygurl)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Deeply puzzled,seek some advice - 2/23/2008 11:07:04 PM   
ChainedExistence


Posts: 507
Joined: 2/5/2005
Status: offline 		Well, I looked over your profile because that sometimes paints a pretty accurate picture of why you might be having trouble. While in some regard you seem to not have many restrictions (any race, etc) on the type of sub that you would consider, there are factors which eliminate large numbers of women from consideration. For example:
Delete anyone already involved in a relationship, ( there are a lot of women on CM who are not looking for a partner)
Delete women who are not from your area, or willing to move to your area
Delete anyone too old or too young (although I can't imagine there's a HUGE crush of 18 year olds ready to date a 50 year old man...)
Delete anyone over 165 pounds (as per your profile)
Delete anyone who loves only tall men
Delete anyone not into a 50's style dynamic
Delete anyone who loves permanent marks and deep bruising
....see what I mean? Every time you set a particular standard then you eliminate anyone who doesn't meet it. Not that there's anything wrong with wanting something in particular, but you have to understand that it means you might have to wait a while longer to find a good match! Of course, most here would say that 2 months is nothing when it comes to looking for a partner. Maybe you are too quick to move someone into consideration?
I am curious why you would look for a partner through CM, if you always had luck without it?
Old saying..if it aint broke...don't fix it!
Edited to add...Took me 7 years to meet Master..worth every day of waiting!

< Message edited by ChainedExistence -- 2/23/2008 11:09:26 PM >

(in reply to MrRandallspe)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Deeply puzzled,seek some advice - 2/23/2008 11:07:59 PM   
Bound2One


Posts: 614
Joined: 1/11/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MrRandallspe

When I send a message to each sub or slave profile that I read,yes,I make sure that I fall with-in what they are seeking, I am polite,make comments as to what things that we share interests in and show an interest in them as a person. I am not rude nor crude nor do I sent them a cock pic. Yet,I rarely get a response from them. The ones I do get a response from,we have enjoyed meaningful talks.However,for every 25 messages I send to a different possible sub/slave, I get just 1 or 2 responses and have yet to have any possible "under consideration". 


All I can say is to echo others on the thread - it just takes time.  It sounds like you're doing everything in a proper way.  Women get a ton of emails here; some of their email based on their criteria may wind up in their 'bulk mail folder'.  e.g., if they don't wish for me over the age of 45 to be able to contact them, they set their criteria that way, and any mail from those over 45 gets sent to 'bulk mail.'  It can be set for lots of parameters.  Just be sure that the women you're writing to are open to someone that matches your description.

If you really feel that you are doing everything 'right', then I suggest patience. 

(in reply to MrRandallspe)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Deeply puzzled,seek some advice - 2/23/2008 11:09:01 PM   
DaddyAndCarina


Posts: 1789
Joined: 2/8/2008
Status: offline 		On my main name ( sasy)  I have  been here four years ....could be more I am really not sure ... I have made a lot of friends a few ignore lists, made a  but I never met any one for ME ....  i  met Master on AOL go  figure.  this isnt rocket science there are no  formula's   to make some one answer a mail ...  Just have paitence ... they  day  when you  quit seeking you  find.

_____________________________

What Daddy wants ... Daddy GETS ~ Carina

I am not simply a label ~ I am simply what he created

(in reply to girlygurl)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Deeply puzzled,seek some advice - 2/23/2008 11:23:02 PM   
MrRandallspe


Posts: 110
Joined: 1/1/2008
Status: offline 		Why look here when I have have success elsewhere before?
Let me ask this,why use premade biscuts when you can make your own from scratch?
Why buy frozen pizza when you can go buy one from Pizza Hut?
Why buy from Pizza Hut when you can make your own?
Why look at 10 car lots just to buy one car?
Simple logic for looking here,,I can look at profiles from all around the world via my computer in all types of weather,day or night.
As well, I can look through more profiles in one hour here than I could meet the same amount of possible subs/slaves in one month.
Besides, looking here does not mean that I have stopped looking else where as well.
Just want to increase my chances of locating the right one by as many muliples as I can.

(in reply to ChainedExistence)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Deeply puzzled,seek some advice - 2/23/2008 11:56:11 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MrRandallspe

When I send a message to each sub or slave profile that I read,yes,I make sure that I fall with-in what they are seeking, I am polite,make comments as to what things that we share interests in and show an interest in them as a person. I am not rude nor crude nor do I sent them a cock pic. Yet,I rarely get a response from them. The ones I do get a response from,we have enjoyed meaningful talks.However,for every 25 messages I send to a different possible sub/slave, I get just 1 or 2 responses and have yet to have any possible "under consideration". 
well for every 25 messages you sent and you got 1-2 then I say you are doing rather well from what I have read from other Dominants...BUT!..I guess the 1 or 2 that did respond did not meet up with what you seek, so hence you are still seeking..remember...you have to be what they seek as well...and the ones that did not respond?..answer:....Either no response was the response..or...if they had responded, but only because they were being polite, would you take this as an interest from them?..and then get huffy if they said ,that you were not what they were seeking?...another reason why some do not respond at all..just view points from the other side of the slash to ponder...Tempting

_____________________________

I have greatly enjoyed the second blooming...suddenly you find at the age of 50, that a whole new life has opened before you.........Agatha Christie.

You must make tracks into the unknown~~Thoreau

(in reply to MrRandallspe)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Deeply puzzled,seek some advice - 2/24/2008 12:01:17 AM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MrRandallspe
I am puzzled as to what does it take from a Dom or Master to entice a possible sub/slave to want to communicate  to the level where she feels contented enought to want to be under consideration by him?



Creativity & flair, doing something which sets you apart and makes you stand out from the crowd, exceptional writing skills, quiet confidence, patience, fortitude, charisma, openness, wit, style, playfulness, a dynamic personality, a good sense of humor, ability and, perhaps most important of all, recognition of the person to whom you are speaking .. seeing them for what they are, what they are capable of becoming .. and not what you want them to be.

Give or take a few of those things. ::grins::

Be the sort of Master which the slave you seek wants.

Celeste

< Message edited by BitaTruble -- 2/24/2008 12:04:24 AM >

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to MrRandallspe)
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RE: Deeply puzzled,seek some advice - 2/24/2008 12:03:17 AM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline 		Get them to talk about themselves.

You need to submit your own ego to the process long enough for them to open up.

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to MrRandallspe)
Profile   Post #: 20
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