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Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 4:06:28 PM   
AnEloquentDom


Posts: 6
Joined: 2/23/2008
Status: offline 		So I am new to Collarme, but I am enjoying it quite a bit.  However, I'm curious if using Collarme is the best way to find a submissive woman.  It seems that most of the women on this site are collared currently, so it seems that finding an uncollared sub might be hard on this site.  So I suppose what I am asking, are there other routes a new Dom can take to meet and find uncollared subs around my age?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 4:18:18 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline 		Different people have had very different experiences.  I've had good success on line; others have had none.  I've had more success meeting relationship-minded women on Alt than CM; others report that Alt is a meat market, and CM is better for finding serious people.  Some people say munches are the way to go; I've been to munches and fetish parties, and I find much more serious people online.  So what's a young man to do??????

Some of everything, would be my suggestion.  Also, aren't there 50,000 students at Ohio State?  Lots of college women are into spanking, especially near exam time.  Can you take out a classified ad in the student newspaper?  (Serious suggestion.)  My point: try a bit of everything, and see what brings you the most success.  If you want specific profile advice, post it, and a lot of people will give you pointers.


_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to AnEloquentDom)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 4:47:24 PM   
SailingBum


Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline 		Since you asked I glanced at your profile.  Your mission statement comes across as a know it all at 22 ??? With little to no exp other than what you have read.  < a good start>  Your nick says 2 things to me.  A your pompous B You need dom in your nick to validate who you are.  Either your a sadist or your not.  FYI a sadist enjois giving pain.  Keep  plugging away. 

BadOne


_____________________________

The beatings will continue until morale improves.

According to SwithNSpanky
We are all so very lucky to have you with us to impart your great wisdom.

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 4:49:34 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline 		I agree with BadOne's assessment of your profile and handle.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to SailingBum)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 4:51:21 PM   
celticlord2112


Posts: 5732
Status: offline 		You could go shopping at your local Sub-Mart......

(you know..."shop smart.  Shop S-Mart" )


_____________________________



(in reply to AnEloquentDom)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 4:55:58 PM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		I don't find your profile to be a 'know it all' profile at all.
I do think you know what you want and what you do not.
This should help in your search.
There are many here searching, and one may be right for you.
In the meantime, you can find your community munch(es), meet people in r/l and here, and find out what works best for you.
I think you're on your way.

~Christina

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com


(in reply to celticlord2112)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 5:02:32 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx
I don't find your profile to be a 'know it all' profile at all.

There you go.  There's no one formula.  Try as many things as you can.  If you find yourself running into a lot of obstacles, ask for advice.


_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 6:00:59 PM   
MistressOfGa


Posts: 2929
Status: offline 		I agree with XX, your profile is a fine example of how to share with others what you are looking for, and what you expect and don't expect. It is intelligent and thoughtful. Good luck with your search. I found mine here on CM and 3 years later, we are still going strong.

MoGa

_____________________________





(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 6:14:48 PM   
MsIncontrol


Posts: 261
Joined: 10/3/2007
Status: offline 		Columbus has one of the most active BDSM communities in the midwest.  It is great, there are at least 4-5 active groups there and they do all sorts of fun things..from munches, meetings, demos to bowling night.

They have a group for your age...I think it is 21-35 but they are great.  They are called AIS-TNG and the people who run it are great.  Start looking at
www.adventuresinsexuality.org they have a calendar of events for all the groups in Columbus. 

Have fun they are great people!

PS - Come up to Cleveland for Kinko De Mayo, we have a big party, lots of classes to hone your skills and you can buy a sub in our Dom/sub auction :-)

_____________________________

Happiness is only real when shared. - Christopher McCandless

(in reply to MistressOfGa)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 6:38:03 PM   
MaamJay


Posts: 2101
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline 		Well I don't know why others were knocking Your profile or Your nickname. I found Your profile to be eloquently written, a huge cut above many masculine efforts, and I can see You have done some research and worked out some basics that You want, while acknowledging that the specifics are negotiable and will grow over time. Pretty good effort I would say!

Try the suggestions already given, especially if there is a TNG group nearby. Nothing better than meeting with real people to help Your ideas evolve and to learn new techniques safely.

Good luck!
Maam Jay aka violet[A]

_____________________________

Life is a song ... and I love singing it! (By me!)

(in reply to MsIncontrol)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 6:48:59 PM   
bleusparkles


Posts: 168
Joined: 2/11/2008
Status: offline 		I personally liked your nick and profile ...

I'd say CM is tough for anyone to use but it looks like you're lucky enough to live in an area with a rather active community so just jump in and don't give up.


_____________________________

bleu's a bit whimsical in the brainpan ...

(in reply to MaamJay)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 7:09:08 PM   
SteelofUtah


Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline 		If I could offer any one thing it would be Stop looking for a MATE and start getting to KNOW people. A sub is not a Used car or something that you seek out find and own it is as much a union as any other.

Reguardless of the snide remarks and comments on "Grow a Pair" I find that if you can be friends with someone you can find out things you never knew you would be okay with.

Sure you know what you want and So did I at 22 I am only 27 now and what I wanted at 22 I have no desire for anymore, Things change people change, Get to know the PERSON not the concept of how you want that person to behave.

Happy Hunting.

Don't let the small minded jack asses get you down.

As Always

Steel

_____________________________

Just Steel
Resident Therapeutic Metallurgist
The Steel Warm-Up © ™
For the Uber Posters
Thanks for the Grammatical support : ) ~ Term

(in reply to bleusparkles)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 7:24:46 PM   
AnEloquentDom


Posts: 6
Joined: 2/23/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SteelofUtah

If I could offer any one thing it would be Stop looking for a MATE and start getting to KNOW people. A sub is not a Used car or something that you seek out find and own it is as much a union as any other.




I completly agree with what you're saying.  I have alot of knowledge of the theory behind BDSM, but not very much when it comes to the more practical aspects.  Getting to know someone, and finding a relationship is something I want more than anything.  Thus, I wouldn't say I'm looking for a MATE, just someone who I connect with on multiple levels, BDSM or otherwise. 

(in reply to SteelofUtah)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 7:28:02 PM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline 		Try a skywriting campaign

(in reply to AnEloquentDom)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 7:30:33 PM   
SailingBum


Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SteelofUtah

If I could offer any one thing it would be Stop looking for a MATE and start getting to KNOW people. A sub is not a Used car or something that you seek out find and own it is as much a union as any other.

Reguardless of the snide remarks and comments on "Grow a Pair" I find that if you can be friends with someone you can find out things you never knew you would be okay with.

Sure you know what you want and So did I at 22 I am only 27 now and what I wanted at 22 I have no desire for anymore, Things change people change, Get to know the PERSON not the concept of how you want that person to behave.

Happy Hunting.

Don't let the small minded jack asses get you down.

As Always

Steel

Gotta love it.  Just cuz ppl don't agree with you their small minded.  Who died and made you king???  Speaking of small minds Things that make me go hmmmm

BadOne


< Message edited by SailingBum -- 2/25/2008 7:32:51 PM >

_____________________________

The beatings will continue until morale improves.

According to SwithNSpanky
We are all so very lucky to have you with us to impart your great wisdom.

(in reply to SteelofUtah)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 7:33:00 PM   
OmegaG


Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

Different people have had very different experiences.  I've had good success on line; others have had none.  I've had more success meeting relationship-minded women on Alt than CM; others report that Alt is a meat market, and CM is better for finding serious people.  Some people say munches are the way to go; I've been to munches and fetish parties, and I find much more serious people online.  So what's a young man to do??????

Some of everything, would be my suggestion.  Also, aren't there 50,000 students at Ohio State?  Lots of college women are into spanking, especially near exam time.  Can you take out a classified ad in the student newspaper?  (Serious suggestion.)  My point: try a bit of everything, and see what brings you the most success.  If you want specific profile advice, post it, and a lot of people will give you pointers.



So many Buckeye jokes this Wolverine could make........

But I think he should have no problem finding a masochist or two on that campus.

_____________________________


Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 7:34:31 PM   
SteelofUtah


Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline 		SailingBum?

Did you take this Personally?

Not everything is about you. This was a comment in General. Perhaps your skin is a little too thin man.

Look Small Minded Assholes are simply Small Minded Assholes it is a Subjective Term what I call a Small Minded Asshole you might call a drinking buddy or friend I am refering to those who wish to push you down and make you feel small. If you feel guilty of this then I understand your taking offence however the comment was not and is still not directed at you.

Again not everything is about you.

As Always

Steel

_____________________________

Just Steel
Resident Therapeutic Metallurgist
The Steel Warm-Up © ™
For the Uber Posters
Thanks for the Grammatical support : ) ~ Term

(in reply to SailingBum)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 7:52:28 PM   
AnEloquentDom


Posts: 6
Joined: 2/23/2008
Status: offline 		One has to love the world of internet forums when someone takes offense from comments not directed to them.  It never gets old.  

_____________________________

"A work of art is the unique result of a unique temperament." - Oscar Wilde

(in reply to SteelofUtah)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 8:09:30 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline 		I liked your profile, it was well written..the only thing I may have questioned as a submissive at your age would be the expert designations you have placed..at 22, I find expert designations to be of a doubtful nature...best in your search/Tempting

_____________________________

I have greatly enjoyed the second blooming...suddenly you find at the age of 50, that a whole new life has opened before you.........Agatha Christie.

You must make tracks into the unknown~~Thoreau

(in reply to AnEloquentDom)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 8:10:09 PM   
SailingBum


Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SteelofUtah

SailingBum?

Did you take this Personally?

Not everything is about you. This was a comment in General. Perhaps your skin is a little too thin man.

Look Small Minded Assholes are simply Small Minded Assholes it is a Subjective Term what I call a Small Minded Asshole you might call a drinking buddy or friend I am refering to those who wish to push you down and make you feel small. If you feel guilty of this then I understand your taking offence however the comment was not and is still not directed at you.

Again not everything is about you.

As Always

Steel


Nope not at all.  I get tired of ppl that resort to name calling.  Just because their points of view differ.  Weather I agree with them or not there are entitled to speak their minds without name calling.  Thanks for your definition of a SMA

BadOne 

_____________________________

The beatings will continue until morale improves.

According to SwithNSpanky
We are all so very lucky to have you with us to impart your great wisdom.

(in reply to SteelofUtah)
Profile   Post #: 20
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