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Who/What you are? - 2/26/2008 7:31:41 AM   
Cradyn


Posts: 44
Joined: 2/16/2008
From: The belly of the beast(bitch persay)
Status: offline 		Although i'm new to this website. I have been on quite a few others and this question has arrisen often enough. The reason I ask it here is due to the ammount of messages i've been recieving from people as of late telling me I don't know what I am or what I look for in a relationship status.

So I wanted to get others thoughts on this.

How do you know what you are, who you are? Such as...How do you know if your a submissive or a slave?(Not in terms of if your one or the other. Mainly how you know you ARE one of those)  I know it's a broad topic as everyone has thier own definition. But I figure the responces might be interesting enough to read through.

Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Who/What you are? - 2/26/2008 8:06:20 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		I am submissive, but I am not a submissive - to me there is no such thing and I am a word whore.
Whatever else I am, depends on the relationship I am in and who I am with.
 
I am me - and people who don't get that, are not worth my time.  I find that pretty much sorts out the post that I used to get.
 
the.dark.

_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to Cradyn)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Who/What you are? - 2/26/2008 8:09:01 AM   
nineofone


Posts: 41
Joined: 12/1/2004
Status: offline 		Crayden. It's really no different than knowing what your favorite sports,or anything is.
I had to be completely honest with my self when I confronted my nature a while back.I had to reflect on my life and see how ive reacted to various people and stuations in my life. While I usually react submissively to most females,the same is not true regarding most other males. I believe its an inner maturity thing.
I spend much fantasy time craving the dominance of a strong woman,yet everynow and then it feels good to slap some ass. I am MOSTLY submissive,yet I must describe myself as a switch to be completely fair to prospective partners.Even though I'm mainly hetero-there was a few times that my ex misstress forced me to do otherwise and it made her happy so I was happy. In this rspect I have to describe myself as bisexual even though I stay away from M-M engagements.
Just be honest about WHO,and WHAT you really want and prefer by looking at your past experiences and describe yourself accordingly.
I hope this helps you some.--Be well.........

(in reply to Cradyn)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Who/What you are? - 2/26/2008 8:14:03 AM   
LadyHathor


Posts: 775
Joined: 1/2/2008
Status: offline 		I often find that when people come in to this life, they try too hard to label themselves--especially in the submissive area. I think it is more important to establish the framework that defines you ( not a laundry list of do you's or do me's)--depth, reality, thinking, a starting place if you will--when that is established, I think with your Mistress/Master you will be able to more clearly title you.
 
Given that, there are those here that will argue there are some clear delineations between the two.
 
 

_____________________________

Lady Hathor, I am the Mistress Hathor of Orleans, I am what I am, often to the dismay and discomfort of others.

(in reply to Cradyn)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Who/What you are? - 2/26/2008 8:19:40 AM   
SubbieOnWheels


Posts: 590
Joined: 12/14/2007
Status: offline 		I agree with Lady Hathor. With some D-type men I may be a slave-type woman. With others I am a submissive woman. It depends on the dynamics of the relationship. Not the name given to the relationship - that's just a bunch of words.

I am a masochist - I like being given physical pain. I am sensual - I enjoy sex - a lot. Everything else is up for negotiation.

_____________________________

Bethical
Beat me, strike me, take away my reindeer! I'll never tell! -- Walt Kelly, Pogo Possum
I yam what I yam - Popeye

http://www.myspace.com/bethical_wheels


(in reply to LadyHathor)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Who/What you are? - 2/26/2008 8:46:29 AM   
Cradyn


Posts: 44
Joined: 2/16/2008
From: The belly of the beast(bitch persay)
Status: offline 		Generally I classify myself as a Switch. In truth those it's a bit difficult to describe to some.

Due to my age and lack of experience in many area's that I wish to have experience in. I dwell like thus; Towards anyone older than me, I am generally a submissive. To those closer to my own age or younger, I treat as an equal(unless their quite firmly a complete subby personality).  It also goes without saying, If your a foot taller than me and have greying hair...it's VERY hard for me to top you lol.

(in reply to SubbieOnWheels)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Who/What you are? - 2/26/2008 8:51:10 AM   
nineofone


Posts: 41
Joined: 12/1/2004
Status: offline 		Well Crayden-there you go.Sounds switchy to me with a basic orientation towards submissiveness.Go with your inner cravings-the rest will work itself out over time..I've been there myself.(I know some D's who should be so honest)

_____________________________

Life is to be lived!

(in reply to Cradyn)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Who/What you are? - 2/26/2008 8:56:35 AM   
Cradyn


Posts: 44
Joined: 2/16/2008
From: The belly of the beast(bitch persay)
Status: offline 		Ya lol I've known a few doms like that. Generally I ignore the fact that they want respect and just tell them outright what thier problems are and that they really need to be truthful with not only others, but themselves as well lol

God loves a freethinker...curious enough..not many of those doms did...And quite a few of them wanted to be called "god" :D

(in reply to nineofone)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Who/What you are? - 2/26/2008 8:59:17 AM   
Cradyn


Posts: 44
Joined: 2/16/2008
From: The belly of the beast(bitch persay)
Status: offline 		...I think imma change my name also. Since i joined this website...I havn't had even one person...type my name correctly the first or second time around lol

I'm either going to change the name...or re-spell it as "crayden" since everyone wants to spell it like that anyhow lol

(in reply to Cradyn)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Who/What you are? - 2/26/2008 9:02:21 AM   
nineofone


Posts: 41
Joined: 12/1/2004
Status: offline 		I'm not submissive to males so I dont have to worry about calling another man God. I have called my exMistress a Godess on occasion and had no prob with it. Funny thing-she went religious and couldnt reconcile her faith with our bdsm lifestyle anymore.......LOL!!!

(in reply to Cradyn)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Who/What you are? - 2/26/2008 9:04:44 AM   
nineofone


Posts: 41
Joined: 12/1/2004
Status: offline 		Sorry 'bout misspelling your name dude. Maybe I should change mine to "he who cant spell right?"  LOL

(in reply to nineofone)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Who/What you are? - 2/26/2008 9:08:21 AM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		I am not submissive, but I am A submissive when someone inspires it from me.  No part of me is submissive except within the context of bdsm.
Kyst
quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

I am submissive, but I am not a submissive - to me there is no such thing and I am a word whore.


_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley


(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Who/What you are? - 2/26/2008 9:09:59 AM   
Cradyn


Posts: 44
Joined: 2/16/2008
From: The belly of the beast(bitch persay)
Status: offline 		haha don't worry about it. I'm quite used to it by now. And generally "Cradyn" is just the name i go by online. IRL though almost everyone calls me Simba. But ya know..i don't like using the name "simba" online because of it being so clique. That and when i did..i got single word emails going "meow" hehe

(in reply to nineofone)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Who/What you are? - 2/26/2008 9:18:26 AM   
BlackPhx


Posts: 3432
Joined: 11/8/2006
Status: offline 		To answer is simply Cradyn, I am me.

I am a SAM, a smart Ass<et> Masochist that is a slave to my Master because that is my relationship with him as well as being his wife.

To others I am a Dominant with a lovely penchant for Dominance and Sadistic usage of them.

I am a Mother my oldest being 38, my youngest deceased at 18 (you know there is no term for a mother that has lost her child, though we have the words Orphans, widows etc..).

I am a Grandmother with a comforting lap and warm cookies from the oven.

I am the complexity that is me, and I leave labels up to others depending on my relationship with them.

As far as labeling yourself especially in a profile, just let them know that what you are depends on who you are with them.

poenkitten

(in reply to Cradyn)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Who/What you are? - 2/26/2008 9:20:14 AM   
nineofone


Posts: 41
Joined: 12/1/2004
Status: offline 		Dont worry little brother-you'll find the one who feels just like you sooner or later.
Hopefully sooner...

(in reply to Cradyn)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Who/What you are? - 2/26/2008 9:22:57 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		me
quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

I am not submissive, but I am A submissive when someone inspires it from me.  No part of me is submissive except within the context of bdsm.
Kyst
quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

I am submissive, but I am not a submissive - to me there is no such thing and I am a word whore.



And in similar context, I am submissive when inspired, but I am not a submissive - the word would have to be a noun to invoke such and it is not, it is cheifly an adjective that defines a noun at a particular moment in time, it is also a verb when addressed appropriately.  But a noun, it is not.
 
I am and can be submissive.  I can be a submissive slut, a submissive me, a submissive top.  But never a submissive.

 
the.dark.

< Message edited by Darcyandthedark -- 2/26/2008 9:25:24 AM >

_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to Missokyst)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Who/What you are? - 2/26/2008 9:26:39 AM   
ProlificNeeds


Posts: 1061
Joined: 5/19/2007
Status: offline 		I am not a 'subby' I am not a 'slave' I am not any label of any kind, because none of them fit me by some peoples definitions, and all might fit under someone elses definition.
I'm a human being with uncommon sexual appetites and preferences in relationship. What I am needs to be discovered by each individual who comes to know me, not labelled by someone who is only interested in making me fit into their little box. "If you are a sub you should do X, Y and Z!" Well then I'm not a sub. If I was vanilla, I shouldn't like A, B, or C!
I'll mirror what many others have said.

I am me, nothing more and nothing less.

(in reply to nineofone)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Who/What you are? - 2/26/2008 9:54:26 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		who am i?

i am a mother, daughter, sister, friend, lover, rock chick, woman, and human as well as submissive. it's a part of me ...who am i and will ever be.

how did i know i was submissive? don't really have an answer for that yet there's a part of me which enjoy expressing my aggressive side when i'm with my pet.


_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to Cradyn)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Who/What you are? - 2/26/2008 10:32:28 AM   
Justme696


Posts: 3236
Joined: 1/7/2008
From: Royal kingdom of the Netherlands
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Cradyn

...I think imma change my name also. Since i joined this website...I havn't had even one person...type my name correctly the first or second time around lol

I'm either going to change the name...or re-spell it as "crayden" since everyone wants to spell it like that anyhow lol


You change your name because others are to lazy to spell it right?



_____________________________

~Been there, done that, got the t-shirt

(in reply to Cradyn)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Who/What you are? - 2/26/2008 11:08:42 AM   
OmegaG


Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline 		now I have the urge to respond:
I'm a bitch
I'm a lover
I'm a sister, I'm a mother

I'm a sinner, I'm  a saint
I do not feel ashamed.....

Serioulsy, I am me and I can't describe what I am.  I make him happy regardless of labels.

_____________________________


Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)
Profile   Post #: 20
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