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NEVER say Never.... - 2/26/2008 11:50:26 AM

MistressVnus

Posts: 1036
Joined: 1/4/2008
From: Central Florida
Status: offline

I remember my first few exposures to the recantings of some scenes in a chat room when I was first coming around to the "public" scene. And, I remember some of the responses going around in my head like, "OMG how could she/he let them do that!!! I would NEVER do that!! That is SO not COOL or SAFE!!

However, not wanting to look like jerk I didn't usually voice these opinions. I did in a couple instances, however, much to my later regret. LOL

I remember walking into my first BDSM party. There was a woman in full breast suspension with about 20 lbs of weights hanging off her labia. Her legs were also suspended. You could see the juice dripping down the weights and on to the floor. Her Master then proceeded to eat her pussy and I watched one of the most amazing orgasms I think I will ever witness in my life. I thought to myself...."NO WAY" could I do that. However, I must admit, the orgasm I witnessed made me wish I could.

Then, I remember the first time I witnessed needle play. The Master (who later became my Mentor, RIP) placed several needles in his slave's breasts. Then he proceeded to whip them out of her skin with a flogger. Again, I though to myself...."NO WAY."

Needless to say, there were many things, over time, that I originally had said..."no way." Whether it be from the top or bottom. (Yes folks, I have trained from the bottom up. Although much of it was simultaneous.) Only to find myself eating my words at some later date.

Now, I'm about as "Edgey" as they come. And now I think, "NO WAY" could I imagine not playing the way I love to play. On the edge..

So, the question I pose, especially for the benefit of the newcomers, is how many of you have found that you now participate in many things you would have SWORN you would NEVER do earlier in your exposure to the lifestyle. What were some of those things? Have you found the "Never say Never" to be useful words of wisdom to impart to a newcomer?

_____________________________

In the ties that bind,
Mistress Venus
http://www.mistressvenus.com

"I'm not IN the lifestyle. The lifestyle is in Me!"

Post #: 1

RE: NEVER say Never.... - 2/26/2008 12:02:14 PM

Shawn1066

Posts: 987
Joined: 10/7/2007
Status: offline

I'm still a newcomer, but yes there are quite a few things I didn't think I'd enjoy that I did. Of course, I didn't swear -never- to do them. I merely didn't think I'd enjoy them at all, and tried them out to please my Owner. It turned out I was wrong, and I didn't have a problem with that.

Is never say never a useful word of wisdom? No, I wouldn't think so. There are some things that are better left untried, I'd say. For various reasons...emotionally, psychologically, and otherwise. People shouldn't feel they have to try things just for the sake of trying them.

However, there are very, very, very few things I wouldn't try for my Owner. I'm not everybody, however.

DV's Fox

(in reply to MistressVnus)

Post #: 2

RE: NEVER say Never.... - 2/26/2008 1:05:57 PM

MistressVnus

Posts: 1036
Joined: 1/4/2008
From: Central Florida
Status: offline

quote:

There are some things that are better left untried, I'd say. For various reasons...emotionally, psychologically, and otherwise.

But don't you think that at some point up the road, one might be prepared emotionally, psychologically, or otherwise, to experience those things? And don't you think the wisdom of imparting "never say never" might keep someone's mind open when it might otherwise be reluctant, or shut down......for whatever reason?

_____________________________

In the ties that bind,
Mistress Venus
http://www.mistressvenus.com

"I'm not IN the lifestyle. The lifestyle is in Me!"

(in reply to Shawn1066)

Post #: 3

RE: NEVER say Never.... - 2/26/2008 1:27:21 PM

Unrepentant1

Posts: 283
Joined: 8/25/2006
Status: offline

As we get more experienced, things seem less daunting. I always said I would never do bi sex, I did, never do watersports, I did, never have hot wax poured on my cock, I did, never do outdoors, I did,etc etc, if you adore and trust the one you are with, the bond grows and so your limits go.

(in reply to MistressVnus)

Post #: 4

RE: NEVER say Never.... - 2/26/2008 1:42:33 PM

Madame4a

Posts: 2045
Joined: 2/4/2008
From: Washington, DC area
Status: offline

I have several of those experiences..

most recent -- having a heterosexual male submissive... don't get me wrong, I've played with lots of men.. mostly gay.. but to have the kind of connected D/s relationship I had (wish to have again) with a man was once on my hard limits page... *smirk*

ah well, glad I didn't say never..

(in reply to Unrepentant1)

Post #: 5

RE: NEVER say Never.... - 2/26/2008 1:46:43 PM

KindLadyGrey

Posts: 358
Joined: 11/6/2007
Status: offline

There was a time when I thought I could NEVER dominate another person. I especially couldn't HURT them; how terrible!

*evil Domme cackle*

How wrong I was.

(in reply to MistressVnus)

Post #: 6

RE: NEVER say Never.... - 2/26/2008 1:52:48 PM

SensualPassion41

Posts: 32
Joined: 4/2/2007
Status: offline

Before I knew I belonged in the world of BDSM, I heard stories of people wearing clamps on body parts, knife play, women having canes and whips used on them, fire play, and I thought "oh hell no, not me!" Guess what...those are MY FAVORITE activities. Just the thought of them make me wet. Live and learn as they say.

(in reply to Madame4a)

Post #: 7

RE: NEVER say Never.... - 2/26/2008 1:55:48 PM

Shawn1066

Posts: 987
Joined: 10/7/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressVnus

quote:

There are some things that are better left untried, I'd say. For various reasons...emotionally, psychologically, and otherwise.

But don't you think that at some point up the road, one might be prepared emotionally, psychologically, or otherwise, to experience those things? And don't you think the wisdom of imparting "never say never" might keep someone's mind open when it might otherwise be reluctant, or shut down......for whatever reason?

They might, but you've also got to accept that they may never. It's good to keep an open mind, yes...but I don't think you should "never say never" either. There are just some things that some people never want, or need, to experience.

Really, we're ultimately saying the same thing. People should be open minded, and they shouldn't be so quick to rule out something that they've never tried just because they've never tried it.

However, there are some limits that will remain limits, and probably should remain limits with some people. I just think, "Keep an open mind" is better advice. Something about "Never say never" just rubs me the wrong way.

I guess I feel people should do things at their own pace, when they're sure that they're ready. For whatever reason, "Never Say Never" just keeps making me think of people who try things just because they feel they have to try them. I dunno, it's strange

lol, I concede I may just be being complicated. :-p

DV's Fox

< Message edited by Shawn1066 -- 2/26/2008 1:57:38 PM >

(in reply to MistressVnus)

Post #: 8

RE: NEVER say Never.... - 2/26/2008 2:01:16 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

I don't consider Myself new, but I'm a long way from where I started out. I would say in the last six months or so, I've gained a few new *interests* that weren't things that I thought I would want to do. Just recently, I did My first branding, which didn't appeal too much to Me before. Now I can't wait to do My next one. I wasn't exactly chomping at the bit over blood, but cuttings are so intimate. I didn't think I'd ever be able to get into the violet wand, but since My husband purchased one, I'm thrilled with it.

Every once in a while, I think to Myself, for heaven's sake, if I get to the point in My life where I don't have a maso, I'm going to be in real trouble with some of My cravings.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to KindLadyGrey)

Post #: 9

RE: NEVER say Never.... - 2/26/2008 2:11:36 PM

darchChylde

Posts: 5279
Joined: 9/28/2006
From: Warm Springs, GA but i live in San Francisco.
Status: offline

Hehe, i thought i'd never want to be seen as service submissive; especially by my Dominant... but now i am aching to wash Her dishes. LoL

_____________________________

I'm the man your mother warned you about...
if only to keep me to herself.

I'm a male dominant switch whose experienced as a poly sub to a dominant woman
.
Where the fuck do I post?

Proud Owner and Protector of chyldeschylde.

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 10

RE: NEVER say Never.... - 2/26/2008 2:20:55 PM

MistressVnus

Posts: 1036
Joined: 1/4/2008
From: Central Florida
Status: offline

quote:

lol, I concede I may just be being complicated. :-p

I'm glad you never said that you couldn't be concedingly complex!!!

_____________________________

In the ties that bind,
Mistress Venus
http://www.mistressvenus.com

"I'm not IN the lifestyle. The lifestyle is in Me!"

(in reply to Shawn1066)

Post #: 11

RE: NEVER say Never.... - 2/26/2008 2:24:16 PM

MistressVnus

Posts: 1036
Joined: 1/4/2008
From: Central Florida
Status: offline

quote:

I don't consider Myself new, but I'm a long way from where I started out.

Lady Pact, I didn't mean this thread was for the new people to post to. Rather, for the new people to read who think to themselves..."No WAY!" *chuckle*

And, I'm like you. If I ever had to go back to vanilla, the poor fellow who ended up with me would be in for a rude awakening!!! Muuuwwahahahahaha!!!

_____________________________

In the ties that bind,
Mistress Venus
http://www.mistressvenus.com

"I'm not IN the lifestyle. The lifestyle is in Me!"

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 12

RE: NEVER say Never.... - 2/26/2008 2:25:38 PM

MistressVnus

Posts: 1036
Joined: 1/4/2008
From: Central Florida
Status: offline

quote:

if you adore and trust the one you are with, the bond grows and so your limits go.

And as a result...the HITS just keep on c'mon!! *literally* hehehehehehehe

_____________________________

In the ties that bind,
Mistress Venus
http://www.mistressvenus.com

"I'm not IN the lifestyle. The lifestyle is in Me!"

(in reply to Unrepentant1)

Post #: 13

RE: NEVER say Never.... - 2/26/2008 2:27:03 PM

MistressVnus

Posts: 1036
Joined: 1/4/2008
From: Central Florida
Status: offline

quote:

*evil Domme cackle*

I'll bet you never imagined yourself having an evil, Domme cackle for that matter!!

_____________________________

In the ties that bind,
Mistress Venus
http://www.mistressvenus.com

"I'm not IN the lifestyle. The lifestyle is in Me!"

(in reply to KindLadyGrey)

Post #: 14

RE: NEVER say Never.... - 2/26/2008 2:28:35 PM

MistressVnus

Posts: 1036
Joined: 1/4/2008
From: Central Florida
Status: offline

quote:

now i am aching to wash Her dishes. LoL

And I never thought I would ache for someone to wash MY dishes!! ROFL
Well...maybe that was always a secret desire..*chuckle*

_____________________________

In the ties that bind,
Mistress Venus
http://www.mistressvenus.com

"I'm not IN the lifestyle. The lifestyle is in Me!"

(in reply to darchChylde)

Post #: 15

RE: NEVER say Never.... - 2/26/2008 2:32:12 PM

MistressVnus

Posts: 1036
Joined: 1/4/2008
From: Central Florida
Status: offline

Oh Madame....

This is weird...as I have usually played with hetero guys. But there was once this gay Daddy Bear.....and we would jump the fence with each other. It was the chemistry.....not the orientation.
And it was then that I learned.....no matter WHAT your usual orientation, given the right chemistry and right circumstance....anything is possible.

Which only goes back to prove.....never say never.

< Message edited by MistressVnus -- 2/26/2008 2:33:11 PM >

_____________________________

In the ties that bind,
Mistress Venus
http://www.mistressvenus.com

"I'm not IN the lifestyle. The lifestyle is in Me!"

(in reply to Madame4a)

Post #: 16

RE: NEVER say Never.... - 2/26/2008 2:44:55 PM

darchChylde

Posts: 5279
Joined: 9/28/2006
From: Warm Springs, GA but i live in San Francisco.
Status: offline

*is mildly tempted to repost a long rant from another website attacking the phrase "Never say never", but valiantly resists*

_____________________________

I'm the man your mother warned you about...
if only to keep me to herself.

I'm a male dominant switch whose experienced as a poly sub to a dominant woman
.
Where the fuck do I post?

Proud Owner and Protector of chyldeschylde.

(in reply to MistressVnus)

Post #: 17

RE: NEVER say Never.... - 2/26/2008 3:07:13 PM

MistressVnus

Posts: 1036
Joined: 1/4/2008
From: Central Florida
Status: offline

Hey darch...was it "your" rant?

_____________________________

In the ties that bind,
Mistress Venus
http://www.mistressvenus.com

"I'm not IN the lifestyle. The lifestyle is in Me!"

(in reply to darchChylde)

Post #: 18

RE: NEVER say Never.... - 2/26/2008 3:13:51 PM

carlie310

Posts: 256
Joined: 9/23/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressVnus

quote:

now i am aching to wash Her dishes. LoL

And I never thought I would ache for someone to wash MY dishes!!

I'm a sub, and I ache for someone to wash my dishes and fold my laundry!

(in reply to MistressVnus)

Post #: 19

RE: NEVER say Never.... - 2/26/2008 3:25:23 PM

MistressVnus

Posts: 1036
Joined: 1/4/2008
From: Central Florida
Status: offline

quote:

I'm a sub, and I ache for someone to wash my dishes and fold my laundry!

hahhaahahah!!! I think this wish has nothing to do with D/s preferences.
*still laughing*

_____________________________

In the ties that bind,
Mistress Venus
http://www.mistressvenus.com

"I'm not IN the lifestyle. The lifestyle is in Me!"

(in reply to carlie310)

Post #: 20

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