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From Straight Domme to Lesbian sub - 9/21/2005 11:02:40 AM

mmmilwaukee

Posts: 3
Joined: 12/10/2004
Status: offline

When I first experimented with BDSM (a few years ago; I'm 28 now), I decided I was a sub because I didn't know what I was doing and needed to be shown "the ropes," as it were. I met up with a few male Dommes from the internet (CL). They were too rough; I had to say "Red Light" like every 10 seconds. And the verbal degradation was NOT for me.
Then there were the male Doms who were gentle enough (I was/am into spanking, mainly), but they wanted to have sex.
Around that time, I gave up on being straight - I like chicks. But my feelings for girls were always very vanilla and tender - I couldn't imagine hurting or being hurt by another girl.
But my kinky side boiled under the surface, and I started discovering my Domme side. I enjoyed verbally degrading men and forcing them to do "no strings housecleaning." I would spank them occasionally, but nothing too hard. And there was never any sexual contact (aside from one guy cleaning in the nude).
Now I've met a bisexual Domme who I really connect with... we made a date, and I spaced out and didn't show!
Dommes: how unforgivable is that? I've made some offers to make it up to her and I guess she is considering.
One final request for advice: How should I conduct myself when/if we meet? I've already messed up by being a no-show. But she knows I've been a Domme before (not pro, just for fun). How "subbie" should I act?

Thanks for all your suggestions and advice!1
M

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RE: From Straight Domme to Lesbian sub - 9/21/2005 11:43:49 AM

brightspot

Posts: 3052
Status: offline

Hello mm,

Welcome to the boards.
I suggest, first, this time you show up,
then just be yourself and communicate
openly and honestly.
From there the both of you should be able
to decide if you should progress in getting
to know each other better.
Good Luck!

*Brightspot

< Message edited by brightspot -- 9/21/2005 11:44:40 AM >

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(in reply to mmmilwaukee)

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RE: From Straight Domme to Lesbian sub - 9/21/2005 10:43:38 PM

theRose4U

Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
Status: offline

quote:

... we made a date, and I spaced out and didn't show!
Dommes: how unforgivable is that? I've made some offers to make it up to her and I guess she is considering.

I think that she is probably more understanding than I would be. Apologies better than "I just forgot" are in order. This shows disrespect right off the bat for her time & your appreciation of it.

-

quote:

I couldn't imagine hurting or being hurt by another girl

.

I lived for a year as the lone straight girl in a lesbian household...TRUST ME women know how to cut right to the core worse than any man I've ever met. The fights I witnesses during a household break up had me in shock. These girls were saying things to each other that as a Domme in full humiliation mode I would never imagine saying.

quote:

One final request for advice: How should I conduct myself when/if we meet? I've already messed up by being a no-show. But she knows I've been a Domme before (not pro, just for fun). How "subbie" should I act?

Your thread title hints that you are wanting to be her sub if I read correctly? I always suggest being yourself & most of all honest.

The big question is what are you hoping to get from the relationship a Domme mentor or more? I would take some time before setting the 2nd meeting to look inside & figure out what you want. Be honest with yourself are you Bi-looking? Switch only for the right person? Seeking a trainer or ...? Your profile says you know how to be foreceful, but in your heart what is your desire? These things must be crystal clear before you waste another's time & potentially lose a resource.

(in reply to mmmilwaukee)

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