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RE: Loving my Master - 3/8/2008 11:50:45 PM   
conquer4love


Posts: 32
Joined: 9/30/2007
Status: offline
I have to agree with MasterFireMaam.

A couple suggestions.

If your going to stay accept it for what it is. If you stay with the assumption that some day he will love you then you may end up disappointed. If you stay with the expectation that you can make him love you then you may end up miserable. If you stay for the simple reason that you love him and don't expect any more than that, IF something changes it's just a bonus.

~~conquer4love~~

< Message edited by conquer4love -- 3/9/2008 12:11:26 AM >

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Loving my Master - 3/9/2008 7:38:09 AM   
MasterGreg43


Posts: 79
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Fla, Ga, NY, NJ, MD, VA, now PA
Status: offline
nothing wrong with being in love with ur Master, just dont allow that love to affect your M/s relationship at all, your love could remain silent and strong in ur mind and heart and if smart use it to guide u to the kind of slave/sub ur Master is pushing u toward and relationship will never die.

_____________________________

Master Greg
PA Dominant King
Dominant King of Sweet Palace of Pain
Master of Sweet House of Pleasure & Pain

(in reply to luvm)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Loving my Master - 3/11/2008 6:37:34 PM   
luvm


Posts: 8
Joined: 3/2/2008
Status: offline
sailing BUM
i guess i have the best fuck buddy there is then....so it is not a waste of time..obviously you are a callous guy....not understanding the needs of a submissive...maybe i am a good fuck buddy thats why He stays with me...mmmm

(in reply to SailingBum)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Loving my Master - 3/17/2008 5:34:26 PM   
luvm


Posts: 8
Joined: 3/2/2008
Status: offline
i think He loves me just does not say i feel it...is that possible?

(in reply to conquer4love)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Loving my Master - 3/17/2008 5:45:13 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: luvm
i think He loves me just does not say i feel it...is that possible?

Sure but you need to stop torturing yourself and either let it go or ask him directly.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to luvm)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Loving my Master - 3/25/2008 7:48:50 PM   
joyfulmalcontent


Posts: 19
Joined: 3/20/2008
Status: offline
I am one of those subs that require, yes, require that loving one another be talked about up front at the beginning of the relationship. I cannot serve someone I don't love and I can't stay if he doesn't love me back. It's just the way I'm wired. I have no concept of how it can work any other way, not that I'm taking hits at those that can separate love from their relationships. I just can't. I love my friends, I love my family, I love my partner (when I'm in a relationship). There are all different types of love and I don't just love everyone but people I sustain relationships with, I have some sort of love for. Just me. It doesn't give any insight into your dilemma, but you have to do what's right for you. No matter how good something is, if it's not meeting your needs (and you'll know it) it's time to move on...

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Loving my Master - 3/26/2008 4:53:09 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline
You need to believe him and not think he's lying to you. Telling yourself that he really does love you and simply says otherwise is the same as calling him a liar. He's already told you the truth. So why won't you accept it?

Denial is not a river in Egypt.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to joyfulmalcontent)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Loving my Master - 3/26/2008 6:11:09 AM   
Masterssj


Posts: 20
Joined: 12/27/2007
Status: offline
when i came on this site originally , i was looking for certain things and a certain type of person , one day i happened on my Masters ad and i knew then and there i wished to contact him and i did so .  my Master was exactly not what i was originally looking for , he is married , time together would possibly be rare at times and a few other things , however as i spoke to him and learned more , i realized he was the perfect Master for me , i was never and never will look to get married again , i didnt have to wonder about the love issues and where its all going , no expectations there , no demands of it and all those other complicated issues , i understand his occupation completely , he is safe in more ways than one and a long list of other things that were extremely important to me alone .  what i am trying to say is each of us has our own ideals and wants , needs etc , what works for my Master and i would not work for ninety eight percent of couples , but for us it does and thats what makes it as good as it is .  you have hard decisions to make when entering a relationship , its not just about Master / sub-slave , its reality and reality will bite you every time if your not prepared for it .  i never expected to have feelings for my Master , and i recall the day i realized i had fallen in love with my Master , he doesnt know i did and i will never tell him , but i recall sitting typing one of my permission requests to him and a few other things and it hit me like a peterbilt truck , walkin the dog so to speak ( meaning a fast truck ) , once i realized it , i smiled and was at peace with it , nothing changed in my mindset toward him or our relationship because i had already had the perfect relationship with him ... i dont feel he would ever care for me that intensely or love me , but i am okay with that ... should he ever find out i would hope he would allow me to have my feelings in peace and accept they are my feelings which allow me to further envelope myself in my submissiveness to him ....  it all comes down to real hard soul searching and what you want and need and the person who can give you exactly what you want and need and you can give them exactly what they want and need and not a i hope i can change my Master because that never ever works not in the lifestyle nor in the vanilla world ...  if he is adamant that he can not love you and you need love , then you are in the wrong relationship because it is doomed , you have expectations that he may change if you just hang on and prove yourself , but it doesnt happen that way and all that will happen is as you grow more in love with him , he will begin to feel the pressure from you for what he cannot give for whatever his reasons and then other things will crop up and as i said the relationship will be doomed and over with .  should my Master ever release me , i will never venture into another D/s relationship , i could never serve anyone i didnt care about , nor could he ever be replaced not even with passing of time , but that is my burden to carry and the choice i have made .  we all are individuals and we all have to make our own choices , it is far more easier to say yes Master and do what pleasures him and both Master and sub/slave are happy then it is to fake ones way through it and hoping your Master will change , it just wont happen and we cannot give you a miracle cure to make it happen ....  soul searching and decisions to be made will hurt like hell , but better now than when in the midst of turmoil in your relationship ....  Masters , sj

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Loving my Master - 3/26/2008 9:06:31 AM   
Maya2001


Posts: 1656
Joined: 8/22/2007
From: Woodstock ONT,CANADA
Status: offline
I was involved with one dominant, and when first getting to know him explained to him what my views were of an M/s relationship and then ended up asking him what his were ...at the time his response was .."Much the same as yours"  I thought  I would have preferred a detailed response in his own words better ...but left it as it, a few months later ... we started hitting some rocky patches,  and I had just been though a hysterectomy which was causing me to become an emotional yo-yo as well I found myself needing the emotional affection but was not getting  and I knew my feeling for him was getting stronger  and his past answer kept haunting me which  questioned a couple more times  was repeated with no details..... finally I  told about my feelings and said I could not continue in this relationship wondering  about his views on what being property meant and I wanted to know  what is views were when it comes to things like love and marriage, that was when he finally told me that he would care for his sub but love and marriage is not part of the package..it took him several days to give me his answer  so I was anticipating  that response, as much as it hurted . I knew and had said to him in the past that love was a very important part of the dynamic to me, because to me recieving his love would be the driving force for me to be able to serve especially in a 24/7 relationship.... I knew in my heart I could not just  give give give  and not get back the one thing I really valued and needed inorder to be happy serving.  I thanked him for his honesty and told him is was better to know that now  before getting in any deeper, said my good byes and wished him well,  and gave him  my best wishes that he finds the person he is searching for.....It hurted a lot at the time but  to me better to hurt briefly  than to spend years hurting  by staying and sacrificing what I felt was iimportant to me.    Only you can decide how important  recieving love and affection is in a relationship is to you, but if you stay thinking he is simply hiding his feelings or that he will change your liking going to be  in for a very rough ride and a lot of pain.    Best advice  anyone  has given me  is .......Be  true to yourself



_____________________________

Lead me not into temptation - I can find the way myself

(in reply to Masterssj)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Loving my Master - 3/26/2008 1:26:49 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: luvm
Will it be unhealthy to continue with me feeling as i do...so in love..and unreciprocated..even though he says he cares about me alot.


Listen to the one that counts.. YOU!... I suspect you already know the answer

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to luvm)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Loving my Master - 11/7/2010 7:49:34 PM   
BabieGothika


Posts: 41
Joined: 5/10/2010
Status: offline
Im in the same situation. I love my Master with all my heart and He never said than He loves me back, never....I know He cares about me a lot but it hurts not to hear Him says "I love u too, babie"

(in reply to luvm)
Profile   Post #: 51
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