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RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/8/2008 4:28:42 PM   
Level


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Now you're talking!

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Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

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RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/8/2008 4:29:55 PM   
sambamanslilgirl


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Strictyetnice

Yes I relise the topic has been done to death. So what?

wow - i hope that lucky submissive/slave approaches you with that same lazy, don't give a damn attitude when she submits to you.

quote:

I am a busy student at the moment, so its just more practical for me to do it this way, since I dont often get larger chunks of free time.

so you think you're the only one with a busy schedule - want some cheese to go with that whine?


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...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to Strictyetnice)
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RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/8/2008 4:31:43 PM   
Aileen1968


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quote:

What do you think the difference between a sub and slave is? (well and a Dom and Master for that matter)

Just curious since the few people I have discussed this with have differing answers to each other, and my own thoughts.


Subs taste good with oil and vinegar and slaves help heal boils.
Oh wait....that's salves.
Nevermind.

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RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/8/2008 4:47:15 PM   
LadyHugs


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Dear Strictyetnice, Ladies and Gentlemen;
 
For me, personally-- the differences between submissive and slaves are the following:
 
Submissives, still have their journey in finding their total state of bliss/happiness.  They will be able to negotiate their wants, needs, boundaries and things that they seek for their own personal gain, knowledge, skills and finding what things within the Dominant and submissive dynamic that will fill the empty cup that they have and yet not totally identified and or recognized, until they have experimented with a vast amount of varieties and styles of the entire 'general' scene; be it BDSM, S&M, D/s and or M/s.
 
Slaves, have accumilated what they have from their journey and now able to identify what creates the spiritual peace and contentment, safety and validation--to include appreciation for their authentic self.  The barriers, the walls that had been applied in the experimental stage no longer are needed as to feel free to be themselves and, inpowered now--they can choose who best fits their mental, emotional, spiritual and physical self in the role as 'slave.'
 
It is my belief that submissives and slaves must be able to give of themselves with quality and not quantity.  Some individuals can not give a blank check to Dominants, thus some would see them more submissive than slave.  Perhaps the fit isn't exact and yet has growing to do in that relationship with that certain Dominant.  However, it is such great relief to some, to be able to hand over to a Dominant, all their worries, doubts, control, trust and love, to include the safety and well being of their emotional, mental, spiritual and physical self, over to a Dominant that has proven through consistancy--not promises alone; to be that special Dominant that provides that slave that safe place to fall into and enjoy the freedoms of the confines of what 'slave' means to them and their Dominant partner.
 
As others have stated truthfully, it really boils down to individual tastes, views on what defines a submissive, slave, Dominant, Master, etc.  The ultimate goal, is to have a partner for a life time and grow and have peace at last with someone who appreciates you as much as you appreciate them.
 
Just some thoughts.
 
Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

(in reply to Strictyetnice)
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RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/8/2008 4:47:39 PM   
Maya2001


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From: Woodstock ONT,CANADA
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quote:

RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/8/2008 9:30:27 AM
No New Messages
quote:

ORIGINAL: MissSCD

The biggest difference in a sub and slave is ownership.  A sub can be a friend, partner, etc, while a slave is part of your own soul.  At least my slave is.  I help him sometimes, and he helps me with things.   It is more like a marriage than a going steady relationship.

Regards, MissSCD



I know a Master  that looks at slaves as being property only, much like a car... a functional  item that requires minimal care to keep functioning and serving ...not soulmates  ...not like marriage ... and not needing to be loved, I turned him down as that is not what I wish to be nor does it meet my needs,  others have different views   current Doms I am seeing  are looking for sub with the hopes of marriage as they want life partners who have similiar interests, they see the collar on a sub as ownership..... as you can see  these Doms and Master haver different views than you do .   The labels themselves are unimportant in my eyes I do not really care whether I am called sub or slave or whether he refers to himself as Master or Dom  more important is that we  share compatible views on lifestyle together and that both needs are being met inorder to be happy together


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RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/8/2008 5:09:22 PM   
softness


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From: Leeds, UK
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more on  the explanation through simile/metaphor

Had this explanation given to me the other night

submissive females are like dogs .. they fall into two groups ... pets .. and working dogs .. both are dogs .. both are pleasing .. both are contented when owned well ... but its up to the owner whether a puppy becomes a pet or a working dog

I really liked that explanation ... until I was informed I was a working dog ... dammit.. was hoping for prize winning poodle


_____________________________

proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio





(in reply to Maya2001)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/8/2008 5:14:52 PM   
crouchingtigress


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Level

I, for one, am glad someone is finally addressing this timely issue.


*grins*...that was funny...

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Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/8/2008 5:37:44 PM   
Paulsgirl


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Dear Ladyhugs: so nice to see you and your very attentive postings.
Here are my thoughts on what you have contributed as i have made the transition from sub to slave.(i think, i hope, i believe).

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHugs

Dear Strictyetnice, Ladies and Gentlemen;
 
For me, personally-- the differences between submissive and slaves are the following:
 
Submissives, still have their journey in finding their total state of bliss/happiness.  They will be able to negotiate their wants, needs, boundaries and things that they seek for their own personal gain, knowledge, skills and finding what things within the Dominant and submissive dynamic that will fill the empty cup that they have and yet not totally identified and or recognized, until they have experimented with a vast amount of varieties and styles of the entire 'general' scene; be it BDSM, S&M, D/s and or M/s.
I also believe that subs do this by a process of making themselves able to 'receive' new experiences, sensations. What they receive is at the behest of their dominant or domme.
 
Slaves, have accumilated what they have from their journey and now able to identify what creates the spiritual peace and contentment, safety and validation--to include appreciation for their authentic self.  The barriers, the walls that had been applied in the experimental stage no longer are needed as to feel free to be themselves and, inpowered now--they can choose who best fits their mental, emotional, spiritual and physical self in the role as 'slave.'
I also agree with this. And for me the role of being able to choose was at last embodied in my abilities to serve, whether or not there is anything given by my Master, and most of all in my willingness to serve in the absence of anything being given, wheter it be sensation, attention, favour or experience.
 
It is my belief that submissives and slaves must be able to give of themselves with quality and not quantity.  Some individuals can not give a blank check to Dominants, thus some would see them more submissive than slave.  Perhaps the fit isn't exact and yet has growing to do in that relationship with that certain Dominant.  However, it is such great relief to some, to be able to hand over to a Dominant, all their worries, doubts, control, trust and love, to include the safety and well being of their emotional, mental, spiritual and physical self, over to a Dominant that has proven through consistancy--not promises alone; to be that special Dominant that provides that slave that safe place to fall into and enjoy the freedoms of the confines of what 'slave' means to them and their Dominant partner.
Yes: i discuss my failings, my wishes to be free, my longings, my needs and indeed i also discuss my disrespect and need to dismiss myself. i also discuss my spirituality, my beliefs and indeed my love for Him. i am entirely free except that He does not give me permission to release myself from my slavery.
 
As others have stated truthfully, it really boils down to individual tastes, views on what defines a submissive, slave, Dominant, Master, etc.  The ultimate goal, is to have a partner for a life time and grow and have peace at last with someone who appreciates you as much as you appreciate them.
 
Just some thoughts.
 
Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

Thank you as always for your considered responses.



_____________________________

Formerly Prinsexx

~There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.~
Anais Nin

(in reply to LadyHugs)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/8/2008 5:39:59 PM   
Justme696


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The difference is how..the slave/sub...sees herself..what she allows.
As a Master this is what you work with. It is not the Master who tells a girl she is a slave.



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RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/8/2008 5:45:55 PM   
softness


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Justme696

The difference is how..the slave/sub...sees herself..what she allows.
As a Master this is what you work with. It is not the Master who tells a girl she is a slave.



see for me it is the opposite ... I give myself to Him and He makes me into what He desires.

different strokes

_____________________________

proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio





(in reply to Justme696)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/8/2008 5:47:09 PM   
Level


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quote:

ORIGINAL: crouchingtigress

quote:

ORIGINAL: Level

I, for one, am glad someone is finally addressing this timely issue.


*grins*...that was funny...


Amy, it sounds like you doubt my sincerety......

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to crouchingtigress)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/8/2008 6:04:30 PM   
SubbieOnWheels


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It sounds to me as though several of the submissives/slaves who have answered this thread are of the opinion that one progresses through sub to slave. I don't totally agree with that. But perhaps that's because I don't particularly want to be a slave. In fact I don't want to be a slave period.

Basically I think that if a D-type and the s-type who share a relationship think that the s-type is a slave, than the s-type is a slave, no matter what the specific dynamics of that relationship are.

_____________________________

Bethical
Beat me, strike me, take away my reindeer! I'll never tell! -- Walt Kelly, Pogo Possum
I yam what I yam - Popeye

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RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/8/2008 6:06:18 PM   
Justme696


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From: Royal kingdom of the Netherlands
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quote:

ORIGINAL: softness
see for me it is the opposite ... I give myself to Him and He makes me into what He desires.

different strokes


so that means you were no slave or sub before..but came here and he turned you into one?
I think every one has a certain base....and on that can be build. That is what the Master does.
(just how I see it...no science behind it  lol)


< Message edited by Justme696 -- 3/8/2008 6:08:06 PM >


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RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/8/2008 6:11:05 PM   
sambamanslilgirl


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From: Chicago, IL
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SubbieOnWheels

It sounds to me as though several of the submissives/slaves who have answered this thread are of the opinion that one progresses through sub to slave. I don't totally agree with that. But perhaps that's because I don't particularly want to be a slave. In fact I don't want to be a slave period.


imho, i view this as a regression from submissive to slave liken to a demotion telling me you weren't submissive in the first place.


_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to SubbieOnWheels)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/8/2008 6:13:56 PM   
Paulsgirl


Posts: 249
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Justme696

The difference is how..the slave/sub...sees herself..what she allows.
As a Master this is what you work with. It is not the Master who tells a girl she is a slave.



well my Master has to keep telling me every day......otherwise  i try to release myself but He refuses to dismiss me....
He says: you're my slave....daily....least i forget lol


< Message edited by Paulsgirl -- 3/8/2008 6:14:23 PM >


_____________________________

Formerly Prinsexx

~There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.~
Anais Nin

(in reply to Justme696)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/8/2008 6:21:35 PM   
Paulsgirl


Posts: 249
Joined: 2/15/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sambamanslilgirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: SubbieOnWheels

It sounds to me as though several of the submissives/slaves who have answered this thread are of the opinion that one progresses through sub to slave. I don't totally agree with that. But perhaps that's because I don't particularly want to be a slave. In fact I don't want to be a slave period.


imho, i view this as a regression from submissive to slave liken to a demotion telling me you weren't submissive in the first place.


i have had many Domiants but this is my first Master...i never considered myself his submissive....
i do not think it is necessarily a promotion but for me.....i needed to get a whole lot of submitting done to let go of receiving control from my previous Doms in order to (after resistance) to accept slavery.....
in one way it is a progression and in another way it's a regression to a simpler mode of being...so i guess the progression and regression just balanced themselves out for me with this particular partner and i just am myself....i slave for everyone: family, kids, and those i serve as students and clients......it's just the way i am and expect nothing in return.....well mostly expect nothing...if i do expect something then my Master knows exactly what to withold to remind me it's not up to my expectations.....



_____________________________

Formerly Prinsexx

~There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.~
Anais Nin

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/8/2008 6:21:43 PM   
Level


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FR

slave: one that is completely subservient to a dominating influence.
 
What does "completely subservient" mean? Whatever we want it to?
 
Is one a slave, until they don't want to be, anymore? Can a slave say "fuck this", and get up and walk out the door?
 
own: to possess.
 
If we own something, does that mean we own it until we, and we alone, decide otherwise?
 
Would we be better served to describe some as "slavish", rather than "slave"?


_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to Paulsgirl)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/9/2008 9:23:47 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


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Well I'm already tired and travel cranky and this sort of attitude just makes me less inclined to add links to assist her "I care deeply about understanding this complex and key scene issue...but not enough to actually put any effort into it, so I'll just take the twenty or so people who happen to pass by this site today and then get pissy with them when they don't pander to my laziness" attitude.

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RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/9/2008 9:29:51 AM   
Level


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Good morning, cranky pants.

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Difference between subs and slaves - 3/9/2008 9:34:42 AM   
caitlyn


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Many moons ago, LA gave the best answer ever given on any and all of these topics.
 
A relationship is, whatever the people in it say it is.

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I wish I could buy back ...
the woman you stole.

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Profile   Post #: 60
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