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male slave verus TG/CD slaves - 3/9/2008 6:57:41 AM

MommaOphelia

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I was wondering about the differences in Doming a TG/CD slave compared to a male slave. I would like for some of the Mistress to give me an idea on training, and scening with them. Do you treat them differently?

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RE: male slave verus TG/CD slaves - 3/9/2008 7:39:18 AM

MistressFaye1

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MommaOphelia

I was wondering about the differences in Doming a TG/CD slave compared to a male slave. I would like for some of the Mistress to give me an idea on training, and scening with them. Do you treat them differently?

Ophelia,

Good question. I've taken one under my wing so to speak and I find myself somewhat clueless because the mindset seems to be a little different than what I'm use to. Several posts ago on another thread I said I was going to do this but now that I have, I'm thankful that I don't see him/her that often (work conflicts) because I'm at my wits ends. He's bi too and tends to lean more towards his femme side. When we're at my place he is male but when we attend club events he prefers to be femme. I told him that he will be dressed male at the next event and this has caused him to be rather anxious which makes me rethink some things.

I'd love to hear what others have to say too.

Faye

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RE: male slave verus TG/CD slaves - 3/9/2008 7:56:04 AM

Reigna

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The main difference is in the types humiliation they respond to. Most I have known carry a deep reservoir of shame at their femme desires and behavior, and this is powerful stuff to play with. The usual caveats and cautions about humiliation play apply.

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RE: male slave verus TG/CD slaves - 3/9/2008 8:45:35 AM

MistressFaye1

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Regina,

The one I'm dealing with seems to have more problems with his "male" side. So what the hell is that? I'm really confused and trying to understand him.

Faye

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Open up your eyes and see what is in store
I must the One that you are searching for.

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RE: male slave verus TG/CD slaves - 3/9/2008 8:51:39 AM

makinkycpl

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Joined: 12/6/2006
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Morning Ladies,
As a sub who enjoys his xdressing experiences, I felt the need to chime in on this one. Although i enjoy the treatment i get form my Mistress when dressed, i also submit to her a a male when she desires. Even though i may want to be femmed out, i respect her wishes to play with me as a man as well. It kinda makes me wonder when we play what we are going to do, am i going to be made up like a maid or slut, or be a male slave to her? Ladies, do what you feel at the itme, the sub will enjoy it either way. Enjoy your day.
slave lexi

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RE: male slave verus TG/CD slaves - 3/9/2008 9:59:20 AM

iwearpanties

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wow just like MaKinkycpl i also have a love for wearing silkys and cding how i do also sub as male with i am .. may its best for some male even if they arent into or havent tried it maybe panting is good but then the ones who crave it maybe they should earn the rite too dress for submissions ?

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RE: male slave verus TG/CD slaves - 3/9/2008 10:20:24 AM

Reigna

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Faye, the vast majority of CDs and TGs have some degree of gender dysphoria--distaste for their male selves. Often this includes distaste for their male anatomy. I have seen everything from mild and episodic dislike of male clothing to reluctance to use their male genitals to outright disgust when they look into a mirror and see a man staring back Some are sufficiently dysphoric that they don't want to be seen as male at all, ever, including during sex. They hate their penises and don't want anything to do with them.

It's interesting that this guy is OK being male when he's alone with you, but wants to present as femme when you're out. My guess is that he needs the humiliation of being femme in public. Definitely something to explore, from your perspective and from his--assuming you decide to continue the relationship at all. Try to estimate the degree of his gender dysphoria, and then decide if you can deal with it. Good luck.

< Message edited by Reigna -- 3/9/2008 10:36:09 AM >

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RE: male slave verus TG/CD slaves - 3/9/2008 10:29:09 AM

faerytattoodgirl

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he probably has gender identity disorder...ask him if he has ever or wished to transition to a girl...

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RE: male slave verus TG/CD slaves - 3/9/2008 10:30:39 AM

LadyHibiscus

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Faye, this is going to be a struggle...not that it might not be worthwhile, but when you have a person who is not on track with where they are on the gender scale (and this could mean multiple locations!) you run the risk of becoming Therapist Dom. For me, that isn't a happy thing.

Good luck!

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RE: male slave verus TG/CD slaves - 3/9/2008 11:14:42 AM

MichelleScd

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Please allow me to put in my two cents worth.

Mistress Faye the one with whom you are dealing who seems to have more problems with his male side might really have some form of gender dysphoria which might need to be explored.

Miss Reigna permit me to differ with you statistically, but the vast majority of CD's are heterosexual and do not have a great distste of their male selves, but have an unexplainable compulsion to express their feminine side through crossdressing. I do agree that humiliation seems to be a major factor in this individuals personality.

I am a heterosexual crossdresser who is comfortable in either male or female clothing. My male side is more agressive. dominate, and outgoing than my female side, which is submissive and shy. The personality I prefer and in which I am most comfortable is my feminine, submissive personality.

A side note is that we crossdressers consider ourselves a part of the transgender community but make a distinction between CD's and TS's (transexuals). Those tending more toward the transexual are those who have reluctance to use their male genitals and often are even disgusted by them.

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RE: male slave verus TG/CD slaves - 3/9/2008 12:15:05 PM

Reigna

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MichelleScd
Miss Reigna permit me to differ with you statistically, but the vast majority of CD's are heterosexual and do not have a great distste of their male selves, but have an unexplainable compulsion to express their feminine side through crossdressing. I do agree that humiliation seems to be a major factor in this individuals personality.

I am a heterosexual crossdresser who is comfortable in either male or female clothing. My male side is more agressive. dominate, and outgoing than my female side, which is submissive and shy. The personality I prefer and in which I am most comfortable is my feminine, submissive personality.

A side note is that we crossdressers consider ourselves a part of the transgender community but make a distinction between CD's and TS's (transexuals). Those tending more toward the transexual are those who have reluctance to use their male genitals and often are even disgusted by them.

Michelle, I appreciate your comments. I'm aware that many people make a distinction between CDs and TGs. I'm not one of those people. There's a joke among TGs to the effect that a CD is a TG minus two years. From my observation, that's not true, but it does acknowledge the many commonalities between CDs and TGs. The argument whether CDs and TGs are totally different or are degrees of the same thing, can get very emotional and political, and I refuse to engage it. I apologize if this offends you or anyone else.

I maintain that a great many gender dysphoric people feel some degree of disgust for their genitalia. Lucky you, to have escaped this! Like you, my sub, a CD, is very male at times, and he's heterosexual. It's my experience, though, that about half of CDs are bisexual. Likewise, some people who transition are attracted to men and some to women; others are attracted to both.

My thoughts only. Enjoy or not.

< Message edited by Reigna -- 3/9/2008 12:17:34 PM >

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RE: male slave verus TG/CD slaves - 3/9/2008 1:34:40 PM

bobipanti

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I can identify with what Reigna has said. I feel more alive dressed as a woman and my femininity can come alive and give me life spirit. It is truly amazing what some clothes can do! I wish I could be that way and feel that way all the time.

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RE: male slave verus TG/CD slaves - 3/9/2008 2:51:27 PM

MsIncontrol

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My submissive has some gender bending fetishes....I wouldn't go so far to say he is a CD and definately not TS. One of the things I do is use the femme stuff as a reward for good service and taking it away as a punishment. This works well for me, someone who enjoys the play...but it isn't my particular kink. I find that my submissive will basically do or take anything I can offer (even though he isn't a masochist) if he has the knowledge that he will be femmed later.

When he is femmed...he is my female slave. I tuck his male parts up and if I want to have sex with him...he is treated as a woman...and we have lesbian like sex, sometimes I force him to wear a strap on to service me. It is fun for both! When he is dressed femme we train on how to be a lady...to walk, to talk, to drink properly..how to sit like a lady....how to properly apply make-up, care for delicate clothing etc. We sometimes have girly slumber parties...and talk about boys....and do girly stuff..like nails and facials etc. The possibilities are endless..and need a lot of repetition.

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RE: male slave verus TG/CD slaves - 3/9/2008 8:35:57 PM

LotusSong

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I do not lump TGs and CDs together as one. TO ME, being transgendered is the result of biology and nature and they identify and strive and need to live full time as the opposite sex. A cross dresser does it for kicks.

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RE: male slave verus TG/CD slaves - 3/9/2008 9:06:38 PM

faerytattoodgirl

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quote:

TO ME, being transgendered is the result of biology and nature and they identify and strive and need to live full time as the opposite sex.

thats transsexual..not transgender. tg is an umbrella term.

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RE: male slave verus TG/CD slaves - 3/10/2008 1:51:39 AM

LadyEllen

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Oh, I wish I were a crossdresser, my life would be so sweet
Evenings I'd be Petra and daytimes I'd be Pete
Without all that real world shit, with which women have to deal
But all the silky lingerie, the corsets and high heels
I wouldnt have to lose my job, my home and family
And risk my life to be myself, 'cause both of us are me
But I guess that isnt possible, it was always on the cards
When looking like a girly didnt make my willy hard

E

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RE: male slave verus TG/CD slaves - 3/10/2008 5:54:39 AM

ItalianSMistress

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I did not read all the replys, but I had a Tgirl for about five years, and I just treated her like My other girls, cuz that is what she was.

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RE: male slave verus TG/CD slaves - 3/10/2008 7:09:29 AM

MistressFaye1

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s. lexi,

That's a great point and I'm glad there appears to be enjoyment for you on both sides of the skirt.

Faye

_____________________________

You can put away your masquerade
You won't ever have to be afraid of Me
Open up your eyes and see what is in store
I must the One that you are searching for.

(in reply to makinkycpl)

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RE: male slave verus TG/CD slaves - 3/10/2008 10:29:03 AM

MistressFaye1

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Faye, this is going to be a struggle...not that it might not be worthwhile, but when you have a person who is not on track with where they are on the gender scale (and this could mean multiple locations!) you run the risk of becoming Therapist Dom. For me, that isn't a happy thing.

Good luck!

Lady H,

As a mental health counselor that is exactly what I've done after reading your post. I asked very specific questions as if it was a counseling session. I did this for two reasons. 1. So I have a better understanding 2. So that he can have a better understanding and in doing so, gain "self" acceptance rather than continue his internal struggle.

I did finally come to understand that he does prefer femme more than his male side and struggles with it. He isn't sure why he considers himself "bi" other than to say he enjoys pleasing both, has never been in a loving relationship with a male but has had casual sex, OFTEN. He doesn't dislike his male parts but he doesn't like them either.

Though I've allowed him to be in femme attire at events he still confesses to being uncomfortable because it's new to him. Meaning the ablility to do so in a group of people that do not judge him and are very accepting.

It appears to me that he has problems with both sides of his psyche and it is as I suspected.

Any advice?

Faye

_____________________________

You can put away your masquerade
You won't ever have to be afraid of Me
Open up your eyes and see what is in store
I must the One that you are searching for.

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)

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RE: male slave verus TG/CD slaves - 3/10/2008 10:32:51 AM

faerytattoodgirl

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quote:

It appears to me that he has problems with both sides of his psyche and it is as I suspected.

Any advice?

as i said earlier...this is classic gender identity disorder. the #1 reason why a transsexual has to see 2 psych's. under standards of care for transition (well with our local gov't anyway)

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