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Financial Dependency - 3/15/2008 4:40:28 PM   
Tavane


Posts: 131
Joined: 3/10/2008
Status: offline 		I find this very appealing, and wondered how others have experienced it. I personally don't see it as a problem, and would love the idea that I had no money except what my mistress gave to me, and she would have to buy me anything I wanted, if she chose to do so.

As for my assets, I would simply put them in long term investments. If I had a house which would appreciate in value, I would simply rent it, and use the money to pay the mortgage, and any excess be added to my investments. If it would not appreciate, I might consider selling it and putting that money in long term investments.

As for current income/paychecks, if it was my habit to spend all the money regularly on non-appreciating property and fun, then I'd rather simply turn over all of that money to the mistress. She will be providing shelter, food, clothing, and everything else. Sure, she will perhaps buying personal property with money I earned which she might not have otherwise been able to purchase, but as a practical matter, that type of property has no value. Even motor vehicles have little value, once they are paid for. I'm not concerned about property which has a few thousand dollars of value over a period of years. If I made a great deal of money, that would be a different story, but most people tend to live paycheck to paycheck, so you are really not "losing" anything if you give her all of your income, in most scenarios. It makes no difference to me if I am using a computer or watching a TV of hers that she bought with money I had worked for, rather than "my" computer or TV, and personally I'd get a great deal of submissive pleasure knowing that she owned everything, including my clothes.  If worse comes to worse, and the relationship ends, the actual value of that kind of property is almost zero. In divorces, judges have zero interest in dividing up what they call "knives, forks, and spoons", and if I was married and got divorced, I'd simply let my wife have all of the personal property which she wanted, in any relationship, that was purchased during the marriage. My pre-marital/relationship property would always be mine, but as far as I'm concerned, if I spend my paychecks regularly anyway, I'd rather just give them to the mistress, so I was totally dependent on her for money. I always have my pre-relationship assets, if things don't work out in the long run.

Have any couples here ever dealt with this issue, and are there any problems I am overlooking, in the scenario I am describing?   I personally am not concerned about "what she is getting". My focus is on "what am I losing?" and in this scenario, I can't see that I am losing almost anything, and am getting a great deal of submissive pleasure from being totally dependent on her, in terms of current income.

Tavane
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Financial Dependency - 3/15/2008 5:05:13 PM   
GoddessDustyGold


Posts: 2822
Joined: 4/11/2004
From: Arizona
Status: offline 		Wonders why this poster thinks that maintaining private assets makes him dependant on a "Mistress".  How does this situation mean that he has no money except what the Mistress chooses to give or provide?  Wouldn't the slave then still have the ability to walk away at any time that things aren't going according to his fantasy?
 
quote:

As for my assets, I would simply put them in long term investments. If I had a house which would appreciate in value, I would simply rent it, and use the money to pay the mortgage, and any excess be added to my investments. If it would not appreciate, I might consider selling it and putting that money in long term investments.


Agrees that turning over all future income while sharing a household is not really giving up anything.
As a slave, is one to be able to make these sorts of decisions as to what to do with assets?
 
Please review your post in its entirely in the hope that you can see that you are descibing a win-win situation for the slave.  You don't even care about the personal property items that the Lady might purchase with the excess you so generously offer as a part of your submission as they have little value in your mind.  But you blithely state exacly how you would handle "your assets"  including any positive cash flow from your rental.  Of course this is no big deal to you.  
Let Me state here, that were you My slave, you would only put into long term investments what I, as the Owner/Mistress allowed you to put into long term investments.
You can't have the romantic notion of pretending to be dependant and claiming you want this, and then protect yourself with a private little nest egg.
Not saying that most reasonable people do not and should not have a fall back provision in case things don't work out or something happens to the Lady.  But what you propose has little to do with the "true slavery" about which you fantasize.  You even state that you might have to rethink the situation if you had a great deal of income.  
*Sigh*
 
 

< Message edited by GoddessDustyGold -- 3/15/2008 5:09:36 PM >

_____________________________

Dusty
They that give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety
B Franklin
Don't blame Me ~ I didn't vote for either of them
The Hidden Kingdom


(in reply to Tavane)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Financial Dependency - 3/15/2008 5:12:55 PM   
LadyHathor


Posts: 775
Joined: 1/2/2008
Status: offline 		financial dependency means the pot you piss in is Mine---when, if and how I chose to allow it.
 
Think well My friend, this smacks of; " i will serve but..."

_____________________________

Lady Hathor, I am the Mistress Hathor of Orleans, I am what I am, often to the dismay and discomfort of others.

(in reply to Tavane)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Financial Dependency - 3/15/2008 5:17:28 PM   
petpete


Posts: 677
Joined: 7/6/2007
Status: offline 		Tavane.. You sound like you going to be living of your Mistress more then anything..

_____________________________

Chief: Max, you realize you'll be facing every kind of danger imaginable.
Max: And loving it!


(in reply to LadyHathor)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Financial Dependency - 3/15/2008 5:20:24 PM   
Ostentatious


Posts: 98
Joined: 7/2/2007
Status: offline 		I think it's a step too far.  Managing your own finances can be difficult without the burden of managing someone elses.

However, like anything else in this realm of being, it may not work for me, but if it works for you, I'm down with that!

(in reply to LadyHathor)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Financial Dependency - 3/15/2008 5:23:20 PM   
MistressVnus


Posts: 1036
Joined: 1/4/2008
From: Central Florida
Status: offline 		I agree with both previous posts.  You're NOT becoming financially dependent if you have assets you can liquidate and walk away.  If so, then whats the point.  Just not wanting to be responsible for making sure all the monthly bills are kept and paid, paperwork wise?  Having your own little accounts payable department? 

There are many men who desires this.  AND, are willing to  divulge the assests.  What I have found to be the hard part is finding one that isn't full of crap.  They want to petition, spend most of time trying to re-direct the "getting-to-know-you" chat into scene, or kink, related compatability issues (put more crudely:  wanker material).  Then when it's time to show up and suit up just for a first meeting.....*poof*....they dissappear.  Does this surprise me?  NO!!  Men!!  Most are full of crap.  They want some semblance of male ego to be able to roost with their Mistress somewhere.  Which feeds right into a thread I'm going to start and was thinking about earlier.

So, take your fantasy, revise it to "really" surrender, and "STEP-UP!"  Or, are you hoping this thread turns into a "Tactics for making finacial submission real" and supply you with wanker material?




_____________________________

In the ties that bind,
Mistress Venus
http://www.mistressvenus.com

"I'm not IN the lifestyle. The lifestyle is in Me!"

(in reply to LadyHathor)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Financial Dependency - 3/15/2008 5:34:11 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		BROVO MistressVnus!

Those lil tidbits they offer to entice, that really mean nothing until it goes real life.  Then we see the real deal... which is mostly the back-end-side, running fast.  Fantasy... damn it's fun... but in an insincere mind... just more for my trash can.  KUDO's to the sincere submissive's!

< Message edited by Lockit -- 3/15/2008 5:35:20 PM >

(in reply to MistressVnus)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Financial Dependency - 3/15/2008 6:04:10 PM   
Tavane


Posts: 131
Joined: 3/10/2008
Status: offline 		Thanks for all the responses. If assets are in long-term investments, then that money is not available to the slave, and the parties can agree that he is not permitted to use that money at any time during the relationship.  He is dependent on the mistress for anything he wants, and you are not "living off a mistress" if you give her all of your income. Her expenses are largely fixed. She will have them whether or not she has a slave. The  only additonal expense she has supporting the slave are food and whatever clothing he needs after ther relationship begins, and transportation. That's almost nothing, when compared to what the slave will be turning over to her, in terms of income. If a slave earns $20,000 in net income per year,  which he gives to her, her expenses for feeding, clothing, and providing him with transportation will be probably less than a third of that, which gives her an extra $13,000 per year in additional income for herself, which she doesn't have to pay taxes on, and can spend on whatever she wishes. She also has a slave, who will do all the housework, grocery shopping, laundry, cooking, errands, and whatever personal tasks she wishes.  performed, of any nature, on a 24/7 basis.

I would never give up my assets to any mistress. She owns me from the time I become her slave, which includes all income I earn from employment after that, but she didn't own me when I acquired those assets, and those will always be mine, even if I can never touch them. She had nothing to do with them. The pleasure she gives me from being her slave is  a trade-off for everything I earn, (and because she owns me, she owns all income I earn), but she didn't give me that pleasure prior to when she owned me, nor did she own me then. If a mistress wanted my assets, my trust in her would plummet. I would never be interested in a mistress who utilized male submission to strip a male of everything he'd ever worked for, only to perhaps discard him after a year or so, and to try to find another slave who had assets. Unfortunately, many women do exist who prey upon older men, pretending that they love them, and succeed in convincing those men to transfer assets into the woman's name. I'm involved in a case like that currently, involving hundreds of thousands of dollars.  A submissive male is even more of a target, because the power of submsisive desires is so infinite, and the desire for slavery and dependency so much a part of being a slave.

As far as I'm concerned, if a mistress isn't satisfied with acquiring all of my income while I am a slave (which will be quite substantial), in addition to all the slavery lifestyle itself, then she is not interested in being my mistress, but rather is interested in acquiring my assets. I am interested in a woman who would love me as her slave for the lifestyle itself, and love having me as a slave. I agree that she owns my income, but would never trust a woman who tried to pursue anything more than that. If she is interested in money, rather than having a slave, then she is not a mistress I would be comfortable with.

(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Financial Dependency - 3/15/2008 6:12:58 PM   
slvemike4u


Posts: 17896
Joined: 1/15/2008
From: United States
Status: offline 		Lady Hathor shall i buy the pot or will YOU be suppling one.Either way works for me...

(in reply to MistressVnus)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Financial Dependency - 3/15/2008 6:14:08 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		Then you aren't totally dependent.  That would be a different relationship dynamic.

Keep what's yours.  Don't get hurt... its just a matter of fantasy and what we make happen.  If its okay with your dominant and you... its all good.  Why worry about it?  I don't see your question really. I do however see something far different, but who cares? lol

(in reply to Tavane)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Financial Dependency - 3/15/2008 6:14:30 PM   
slvemike4u


Posts: 17896
Joined: 1/15/2008
From: United States
Status: offline 		Suppling+supplying

(in reply to slvemike4u)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Financial Dependency - 3/15/2008 6:58:24 PM   
MistressVnus


Posts: 1036
Joined: 1/4/2008
From: Central Florida
Status: offline
quote:

If a mistress wanted my assets, my trust in her would plummet. I would never be interested in a mistress who utilized male submission to strip a male of everything he'd ever worked for, only to perhaps discard him after a year or so, and to try to find another slave who had assets.


Then you haven't found the right Mistress.  And, something about tightening the financial binds comes with time.  As with all steps of Domination (or even Marriage).  However, if you have found a Mistress who isn't interested in "stripping" your assets, but increasing them as "our" assets to further increase the comforts of you both, then you've got the "real" idea of the entire picture.  But, also using it to remind you that you are "HERS."  This isn't a whim of sexual fantasy.  Be careful before you "buck-up" on a male ego whim, or your dick gets hard over someone.

I understand your thinking.  And I can't say it isn't wise.  However, I CAN say that a real "total" financial dependency is only there when ALL assets are turned over.  Through prenuptial agreements and marriage, perhaps.  Through promissory notes, perhaps.  The idea is, that your male ego can't rear it's ugly head and just walk you out the door in an attempt to turn the tables with emotional/psychological power struggles with your Mistress.  You are seriously going to have to consider a "buck-up" on your part. 

I've never had this arrangement yet.  But a partial one.  As you describe.  It was pointless.  He might as well just be given a certain amount of "household contribution" to pay each month and consider it an agreement, or rental/lease agreement.  It is NOT financial domination.  And even then, when it was his time of the month (*slapping knee here*) he would sometimes insinuate witholding his monthly obligation to squelch his "male ego" and give himself a false reassurance of his manhood.  Needless to say, there's no free lunch here (regarding my time/training, and emotional investment).  Phuck that.

It's a double edged sword my friend.  Too many men want to come be your slave.  Learn.  Have their sexual fantasies fulfilled.  Spew all sorts of verbal commitments in the heat of the moment. And then when a more "impulsively desirable" Mistress comes along, and their dick gets hard, out the door they go.

Like I said, it works both ways and is a double edged sword.  But, I do believe, if you find the right dynamics with the right Mistress, it would not be in vain, and very rewarding in the longrun.  And, as with ANY relationship, it is a risk you take.

I've seen many get taken for everything and BDSM didn't have a thing to do with it.  She was just smarter and his dick got hard.  Go figure.


_____________________________

In the ties that bind,
Mistress Venus
http://www.mistressvenus.com

"I'm not IN the lifestyle. The lifestyle is in Me!"

(in reply to Tavane)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Financial Dependency - 3/15/2008 7:35:55 PM   
Tavane


Posts: 131
Joined: 3/10/2008
Status: offline 		I must say I'm absolutely shocked at the responses to this post. In my view, financial dependency is a very minor part of being a slave. It's just an icing on the cake, which I'd enjoy. Slavery is a 24/7, intimate, emotional, loving, sexual, total lifestyle, which has virtually nothing to do with money. It's a lreality of life. You love being a slave, simply because you are a slave, not because you are "forced" to be a slave because of financial pressures. A Mistress loves being a mistress, simply because she loves that role, and my role as a slave, not because she has financial benefits.  I was actually expecting some people to post something like "Turning over all of your income to a mistress might actually not be a good idea, since she might pretend to love you and the relationship because it was so much in her financial interest to do so". Not only didn't I see any posts like that, but everyone seems to think that a male should turn over assets he's worked his entire life for to a person he might only have known for a few months, or a year, or whatever. I am astounded at these responses. Total financial slavery seems to be so sought after here that it really startles me. Do you want slaves, or do you want money?  Isn't it enough that a male is willing to be your total slave?  Do you believe that a slavery relationship is immune from unhappiness and termination? Do you think that simply because you are mistresses, a male should turn over his entire life's assets to you, no matter how you treat him, or whether you get run over by a truck?  This is just astonishing, and in my mind has nothing to do with the loving relationship between a slave and his mistress. 

(in reply to MistressVnus)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Financial Dependency - 3/15/2008 7:51:16 PM   
MistressVnus


Posts: 1036
Joined: 1/4/2008
From: Central Florida
Status: offline
quote:

Total financial slavery seems to be so sought after here that it really startles me. Do you want slaves, or do you want money?  Isn't it enough that a male is willing to be your total slave?  Do you believe that a slavery relationship is immune from unhappiness and termination? Do you think that simply because you are mistresses, a male should turn over his entire life's assets to you, no matter how you treat him, or whether you get run over by a truck?  This is just astonishing, and in my mind has nothing to do with the loving relationship between a slave and his mistress.


I don't think that's what we are saying at all. That it is a "sought after" priority.  I think what we are saying is that if you are going to start a thread about FINANCIAL DOMINATION, then don't half-ass what financial domination is!!

I don't think anyone said anything about it not being loving.  I just think you have to call a spade a spade.
If it is financial domination you are seeking, and wondering what it's about, don't be so shocked with the answers you get.
And you can be appalled all you want, but some men really get off on the "objectification" type domination versus your loving relationship type Domination.  There are many facets to this lifetyle, and some will even find YOUR ideas appalling.  As you are finding out.
You say, and I quote "Isn't it enough that a male is willing to be your "total" slave?"
Again, holding back is not "total."
We are just trying to clear up for you the difference between real financial domination, and bullshit financial domination.
So, don't be so surprised.
After all, you did title your thread FINANCIAL DOMINATION.  Not, "I'm Appalled at Financial Domination!"

< Message edited by MistressVnus -- 3/15/2008 7:54:43 PM >

_____________________________

In the ties that bind,
Mistress Venus
http://www.mistressvenus.com

"I'm not IN the lifestyle. The lifestyle is in Me!"

(in reply to Tavane)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Financial Dependency - 3/15/2008 7:51:58 PM   
LadyHathor


Posts: 775
Joined: 1/2/2008
Status: offline 		well sweetheart, lets put it this way--lets hope you find a Domina that is from the frame of mine that you are--given that you will succeed, I am sure--however, you cannot speak for all slaves or all financial slaves because there are many variations on a theme----some choose to give all, some choose to play poker.
 
 
 

_____________________________

Lady Hathor, I am the Mistress Hathor of Orleans, I am what I am, often to the dismay and discomfort of others.

(in reply to Tavane)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Financial Dependency - 3/15/2008 8:36:41 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		Many dominant's will be very loving and will require or expect or allow for your financial slavery with just your yearly income.  But that is not a total financial slave.  It's a matter of wording pretty much.  This is your fantasy...  your life... do what you will.  Just know from this thread that a dominant will respond to certain words and if you are saying you want total, they are hearing total and when you back up and retain something... it isn't total.

Do a search on this topic.  You will find many who advise against total financial slavery. 

(in reply to LadyHathor)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Financial Dependency - 3/15/2008 8:37:33 PM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline 		I think it rather unwise of a Mistress to throw herself into finacial slavery to a submissive.

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Financial Dependency - 3/15/2008 8:39:47 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

I think it rather unwise of a Mistress to throw herself into finacial slavery to a submissive.


ROFL... damn I just pictured being run over by a train!  That is one scary picture there!

(in reply to Leatherist)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Financial Dependency - 3/15/2008 8:47:35 PM   
Tavane


Posts: 131
Joined: 3/10/2008
Status: offline 		My post was about financial dependency, not financial slavery. Being dependent in day to day life as long as relationship exists, even for life, is a totally different thing than total financial slavery. Any relationship should be based upon mutual desires, needs, and love. Things like dependency are simply variations which some will enjoy (me included),  and some will not. No relationship should ever result in one personperhaps  being forced to be totally unhappy on a continual basis, whether it's a slave relationship or not. It's a relationship, not a commercial transaction. Those who regard it as the latter are far different from anything I've ever envisioned.

Tavane

(in reply to Leatherist)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Financial Dependency - 3/15/2008 8:48:59 PM   
YourhandMyAss


Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		Mistress's do not have to have sex with the boys they choose to collar or dominate. Infact some choose to have no sexual contact what so ever.
quote:

ORIGINAL: Tavane

Slavery is a 24/7, intimate, emotional, loving, sexual, total lifestyle,

(in reply to Tavane)
Profile   Post #: 20
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