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RE: what are the qualities of a Dominant - 3/22/2008 6:24:00 AM

lusciouslips19

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lally3

take an empty soda pop can, fill it with some pennies, tape it and throw it at the dog. this will startle the dog and he wont like it.

thanks lucious, it does work, i just have to pick it up now and shake it and he shrinks back, its a miricle. not interested in bonding with him, he's a pig, but at least i can stop him attacking noonoo and squeezy - two weeks and counting.

Yay!

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RE: what are the qualities of a Dominant - 3/22/2008 6:37:35 AM

lally3

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Dogs (subs) obey strength. Dogs (subs) attack (top) weakness, it is their nature. RL.

why is that.

( i love this guy) - in a pack of dogs i can see where the dominant needs to hold its ground or be attacked, because survival needs a strong leader.

i have and i probably would still push at a dominant that i knew i could push and the dynamic would die right there, as it infact did....... once the tear in the fabric began i just kept pulling the thread until it unravelled. its not an endearing quality and a dominant cant exert power exchange without the subs submission, thus the whole thing spirralls away.

why do some subs do that....... i spose its about the qualities we look for. for me its consistency, patience, sense of humour, gentleness, calm, steady and.... ruthless - he has to have a ruthless streak. i need to know i can bounce along in my chaotic way for just so long before he oiks me back and makes me think, behave, respond, do things a little differently to suit him better.

just mulling

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RE: what are the qualities of a Dominant - 3/22/2008 11:22:18 AM

DesFIP

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In addition to the can with pennies for stopping bad behavior, you need to teach good behavior. If you say sit, and he does, give him a small bit of cheese as well as tons of praise. The only way my sister survived her lab's puppyhood, can of pennies and American cheese.

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RE: what are the qualities of a Dominant - 3/22/2008 11:37:17 AM

Venatrix

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

In addition to the can with pennies for stopping bad behavior, you need to teach good behavior. If you say sit, and he does, give him a small bit of cheese as well as tons of praise. The only way my sister survived her lab's puppyhood, can of pennies and American cheese.

Given what most American cheese tastes like, I would have thought that would be the punishment and the can of pennies the reward.

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RE: what are the qualities of a Dominant - 3/22/2008 12:57:10 PM

Sirsinini

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Justme696

One quality would be to send the dog way...and keep the sub..when you want sex..lol

but seriously..that is one hard question...and different for all I guess.

I could NOT let this one get by... on another thread...your two cents worth was.

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RE: what are the qualities of a Dominant - 3/22/2008 1:07:39 PM

Sirsinini

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lally3

Dogs (subs) obey strength. Dogs (subs) attack (top) weakness, it is their nature. RL.

why is that. ( i love this guy) - in a pack of dogs i can see where the dominant needs to hold its ground or be attacked, because survival needs a strong leader.

i have and i probably would still push at a dominant that i knew i could push and the dynamic would die right there, as it infact did....... once the tear in the fabric began i just kept pulling the thread until it unravelled. its not an endearing quality and a dominant cant exert power exchange without the subs submission, thus the whole thing spirralls away.

why do some subs do that....... i spose its about the qualities we look for. for me its consistency, patience, sense of humour, gentleness, calm, steady and.... ruthless - he has to have a ruthless streak. i need to know i can bounce along in my chaotic way for just so long before he oiks me back and makes me think, behave, respond, do things a little differently to suit him better.

just mulling

lally,
The qualities you would seek are not those I would seek... I am guessing just by reading your profile and reading your posts.
I think this is just an obvious statement. But then simple and obvious are fodder for sarcasm at times.

I would like to interject a quote I found several years ago.... It is Gor in nature but I changed it a bit for me... it might answer someone's question along the line you have posted....

What is it that the dominant teaches the submissive?
He shows her the truth of her own being.
He does not tell her something new or different.
He shows her something her soul already knows but which her mind has forgotten.

Sir's devoted property

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Post #: 46

RE: what are the qualities of a Dominant - 3/22/2008 1:11:10 PM

Justme696

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Sirsinini

quote:

ORIGINAL: Justme696

One quality would be to send the dog way...and keep the sub..when you want sex..lol

but seriously..that is one hard question...and different for all I guess.

I could NOT let this one get by... on another thread...your two cents worth was.

Status: online The good Dom

Good - better - best - favorable - bountiful - fertile - handsome - attractive - suitable - fit - profitable - advantageous - pleasant - agreeable - salutary - wholesome - amusing - clever - considerable - ample - full - well-founded - cogent - real - actualized...Dominant

not every one is born for humor ;)

I hate when list of words say something about a whole group of people. That kills the individual.

And besides that....posting here from an other thread...rips it all out of context.

< Message edited by Justme696 -- 3/22/2008 1:12:55 PM >

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RE: what are the qualities of a Dominant - 3/23/2008 3:04:42 AM

twistedtight1

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Try taking the dog out of its familiar enviroment of your mom's place and take him/her to yours with your smell all over the house and have a disipline session...seems when they have a new area to acclaimate to they respond without anger but not sure about the fear...i have a rotty rescue and recently acquired a pitt rescue and their new area makes them a tad out of their control..smiles always twist...oh and ps...trust is my highest quality for a Dom...it does indeed have to be earned...but when you have feelings of trust everything falls directly into place...just like good music...smiles

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Post #: 48

RE: what are the qualities of a Dominant - 3/23/2008 5:34:35 AM

Justme696

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quote:

of trust everything falls directly into place...just like good music...smiles

next time I ask my girl what music she likes and skip all the decent stuff lol

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RE: what are the qualities of a Dominant - 3/23/2008 3:10:37 PM

HerLord

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Real_Trouble

quote:

ORIGINAL: lally3

im prompted to ask this cos im looking after my mothers dog at the moment. im supposed to be the alpha bitch in this situation, and im finding it really hard to be patient with the little MF.

i tried a bit of D/s with it, you know, praise when good, tell off when bad - but the creature is a hell hound with no discipline or regard for it and actually its domming me.

so, got me thinking, what are the qualities of a dominant that a submissive needs so much in their life.

Primarily, all of us are:

1 - Incredibly intelligent.

2 - Wickedly good looking.

3 - Patient as time.

4 - Extremely rich.

5 - Animals in the sack.

6 - Exceedingly modest.

Ahem.

In seriousness, the most important three things I have learned being a Dominant, with regard to actually being a positive influence on a sub, are thusly: be patient, be firm, and listen.

If you just manage those three things and nothing else, you are likely to at least do no major harm.

Be Patient, Be Consistant, Be Understood

I only altered what you said here to better demonstrate My issues I have with some of the other "Dom/me"'s I see around. Firm is good, but consistancy is easier to comply with. There are less "Interperative" variables. Being Understood is considerably more inclusive a task than just listening. Being under stood means that not only do We have the responsibility of understanding what We are listening to, but also ensuring that We are being understood also. This sometimes means We have to alter Our communication styles so as to be more clear to Our audience.

This is the point I was intending to post to the OP, So your contribution was vital. We thank you all for your participation.

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RE: what are the qualities of a Dominant - 3/23/2008 5:00:48 PM

DesFIP

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Venatrix

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

In addition to the can with pennies for stopping bad behavior, you need to teach good behavior. If you say sit, and he does, give him a small bit of cheese as well as tons of praise. The only way my sister survived her lab's puppyhood, can of pennies and American cheese.

Given what most American cheese tastes like, I would have thought that would be the punishment and the can of pennies the reward.

lol. Actually labs are renowned for having no taste buds and endless appetites. He's the only dog I've ever heard of who would eat an uncooked piece of pasta if it fell on the floor.

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RE: what are the qualities of a Dominant - 3/23/2008 6:00:18 PM

MasochistToy

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First and foremost the problem with the dog. Can't help there. I am a cat person. They are so independant and take care of themselves. I love cats! Love the attitude.

On to what I need in a dominant. I need a person who is honest about who they are, arrogance is nice if it is deserved (yep love that you are the bitch and I am God attitude), a perosn who can make decisions, strict rules, creative, spiritual, caring, understanding and intelligent. If they are not intelligent then I don't even talk with them.

I am an intelligent, honest, creative, powerful woman. I don't say that because I am bragging about myself, but because I am honest about how I am. My dominant has to be strong enough to allow me to be my own perosn, and yet command my obedience anyhow, anywhere, at anytime, and yet recognize when it would not be appropriate. I am very fortunate to be married to my owner, and he is all of the above as well as an incredibly sensitive and loving father and person. Oh, and he is a musician which gets serious bonus points!

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RE: what are the qualities of a Dominant - 3/23/2008 6:04:17 PM

MasochistToy

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And I know I have serious typos! I said intelligent, not a great typist!

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RE: what are the qualities of a Dominant - 3/23/2008 6:41:21 PM

Griswold

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lally3

should have known i wouldnt get many sensible answers tsk,

ive tried starring him down, the little bastard just stares straight back at me.

I've never had a problem with any aggressive animal...including dogs that are trained as attack dogs.

1) A stern and stable voice..."NO!!!".

2) A sharp thwack on the nose when they do something you don't approve of (with your fingers...lightly, but with meaning....chill out people).

3) If the above backfires....run like hell.

< Message edited by Griswold -- 3/23/2008 6:42:01 PM >

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RE: what are the qualities of a Dominant - 3/23/2008 9:45:44 PM

Archer

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Bottom line is Dominant is a trait or charateristic. So a Dominant is someone who exherts dominance consistantly. The rest of the traits are additional, and make them a dominent who shares the social values set up within a community. The things that make them acceptable as a dominent partner for a relationship.
A "Good Person" who also happens to have a dominent trait.

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RE: what are the qualities of a Dominant - 3/23/2008 11:12:40 PM

chellekitty

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concerning dogs: there have been quite a few excellent suggestions in this thread...always remember...positive re-enforecement encourages a behavior and negative discourages a behavior...you want a dog to stop doing something you shake a can of pennies at them or spray them with water (actually i prefer vinegar water, 1 part vinegar 10 parts water...as someone else mentioned they have very sensative noses, at these porportions, a human can not smell it unless it is right under their nose but a dog will go nuts trying to get one spray's worth off of their hind quarters...) if you want a dog to do something, you coax them into doing it with treats or a sweet voice and then reward them with the treat or back scratches or whatever works with them...
as for establishing dominance...which is not the same as training them...you may or may not have to force them to their backs so that you have access to their throats and bellies, but to have dominance over a dog, you have to have access to their throats and bellies...by force or by volunteering is up to the dog...thats just the way it is with dog psychology...

concerning humans: we have higher functioning brains...it requires more indepth dominance to gain submission, and for each submissive it is different...so what what are the qualities of a dominant or what kind of dominance does it take to get submission? because i am pretty sure that everyone can agree that a dominant should not be a sociopath or a serial killer, though that may be hot for a moment, it is limiting on time...(death ends things quickly)....hmmm, maybe it doesn't even matter....because i am pretty sure this question will be answered with a defined set of qualities just as soon as we define the difference between a submissive and a slave....

my $.02
chelle

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