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BitaTruble -> RE: No Limits (3/22/2008 1:05:40 PM)
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Okay, here we go.
I don't have any limits.
(Opps.. stop reading.. nut job alert! Put her in a straight jacket and call the guys in white coats!) It's all good, I like straight jackets. I'll smile. I'll drool. I'll be happy.
I acknowledge there are things which are not possible. I don't call them limits though. I call them what they are which is.. um, impossible. ::laughs:: I don't believe anyone else has limits either even if they may think they do. Here's why ...
There may be times in life when a choice must be made between an evil and a greater evil. No one knows if some future event may cause them to discard all the preconceived notions they carry and step over a boundary they never thought they would because it is the lesser of two evils. I'm not a fortune teller. I don't know what the future may hold, but I am perfectly aware that any one 'thing' I may say is a hard and steadfast limit may become, at some point, through some unforeseen circumstance, my only viable option. I feel it is a more honest approach to acknowledge such possibilities than to say that possibilities don't exist.
The most extreme example is usually death. Death is a hard limit. I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad new and tell all the folks who hold fast to that one but, you're going to die. Period. Your 'saying' it's a hard limit isn't going to prevent the inevitable. The other extreme example is the chainsaw cutting off a limb. I can think of several things worse than having a limb cut off by a chainsaw. Bear chewing on my leg .. it's gonna kill me. Cut the damn leg off and hopefully save my life and so on and so forth.
My preference would be for folks to say that within a given BDSM relationship, there are the limits they would impose. Don't cut off my leg for your pleasure. Don't kill me on your whim. Don't break my bones. Don't break my spirit. Have a 'reason' for your extreme action which may cause me harm other than it gets your rocks off. To me, perfectly acceptable and, actually, a very wise way to go about the business of life in an intimate personal relationship.
::wonders how many are rolling their eyes at this obviously backwards way of looking at the world:: [:D] Here's the thing. When discussing limits vs no limits the extremes are almost always taken outside of a BDSM context and that's the very place where the argument falls apart! Outside, in the big bad world of reality, any damn thing is possible! BDSM is a place where many come to fill their fantasy's. Where they can drop the extremes in the real world and indulge in the activities which fulfill them. BDSM is where it's actually safe to say no because, out there, you don't always get that option. Within the narrow confines of a BDSM relationship, everyone and I do mean everyone has the right to determine what they will and will not do.
Everyone has the right to impose limits and to discard limits .. and the means of expressing that right is, generally, done through the process of finding someone with whom you are compatibile. If and when that happens, the limits you may or may not have within that intimate personal relationship are your business and the business of your partner/s and if someone else wants to get you into a straight jacket because you're a kook, you really should allow it because straight jackets are fun and expensive and you'll get a free one. [8D]
Celeste
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