RE: Would you if you could? (Full Version)

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Daddysredhead -> RE: Would you if you could? (3/27/2008 7:01:25 PM)

Funny, Daddy and I have this conversation every now and again.  I don't really mind who knows, but my Thing 1 and Thing 2 don't need to know.  They're too young.  As for the people I've outed myself to, some were buggy-eyed and some were non-plussed.  Most people I know aren't really surprised because I'm a bit "out there" in a silly, flirty way, and make jokes about this stuff and other topics, which makes people just kinda wonder if I'm pulling their leg.  One of my sisters knows, my father knows I'm deferential to Daddy and that we have roles that we maintain with one another, many of my friends know, some co-workers know, and whomever else is clever enough to figure it out.




Evility -> RE: Would you if you could? (3/27/2008 7:26:07 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Twicehappy2x
Would you if you could?


I could if I wanted to but I choose not to. I can see people being curious about a poly household but most of us are just couples so there's no curious living situation causing anyone a red flag. There's no need. Sometimes I think it's great when people wear their kink on their sleeve and sometimes I think it's a kink in and of itself to do the same not unlike exhibitionism.




DesFIP -> RE: Would you if you could? (3/27/2008 7:27:44 PM)

My father's 81. What good would it do to tell him? I allow people to see us interact and draw their own conclusions. What they see is a relationship wherein we still hold hands and hug all the time, we laugh and tease each other, we have enormous respect for each other. And this five years in.

But we're not high protocol, and being a single parent, that's not something I would do. See, going public wouldn't just impact my life and friends, it would rebound on them.




Bound2One -> RE: Would you if you could? (3/27/2008 7:27:55 PM)

No, I wouldn't.  My sex life is personal and I don't discuss it with anyone except Master.  [:)] 




Suzykeu -> RE: Would you if you could? (3/27/2008 7:32:31 PM)

i would if i could, but i can't so i won't.




petdave -> RE: Would you if you could? (3/27/2008 7:34:22 PM)

i'm as open as i need to be... My family knows that i do all the housework, and that i check with my wife before committing to anything... They've seen my collar and my brand... At this point, everything else is on a "don't ask, don't tell" basis. i don't like having to make up stories about something that's so integral to me, much less try to put on a big "what I say goes, because I'm the MAN of the house!" show for other people's benefit... However, my habit is always to offer the minimum explanation, and let the person i'm talking to decide if they want to know more. They usually don't [:)]




TNstepsout -> RE: Would you if you could? (3/27/2008 7:34:52 PM)

If I could tell the people in my life and it would be completely accepted, then yes, I would LOVE to tell them. The only reason I don't is that I fear the discomfort of the encounter. Who knows, maybe they would be completely cool with it. Maybe they wouldn't be shocked at all and wonder why it took me so long to figure it out. Anyway, it would be great for me, then I could tell my kids (grown) that I'm going to a munch/play party and will be back late and not have to make up a cover story and field questions about "how my date went".




Vendaval -> RE: Would you if you could? (3/27/2008 7:36:15 PM)

I am a very private person by nature.  Information is released strictly on a "need to know" basis.




AMaster -> RE: Would you if you could? (3/27/2008 7:38:05 PM)

Most people that really know me are aware of my
kinky side.




LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Would you if you could? (3/27/2008 7:40:24 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Twicehappy2x
Would you if you could?

I did.  While I have not explicitly come out to all of my family as being "kinky"- they know I've gone to adult type conventions, I don't hide the books or posters or toys when they are visiting, and I simply do not call someone a friend unless I can be open about who I am completely with them.

It was necessary to inform my family of being poly because at some point you're so intimate, spending so much time together that
a) it becomes an emergency issue, they need to know this person is to be trusted with information and that he/she may be the one to call them if something happens

b) it's time to meet the family and join those important parts of my life together

c) it's really unfair to have people reasonably start to wonder if you're having affairs, just tell them everyone's aware of the situation and that's enough




LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Would you if you could? (3/27/2008 7:42:04 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz
I'd never casually flaunt what I do in front of people that probably don't want to hear it. What mom wants to hear, "Moommm? Why is that lady licking that man's boots in the fruit aisle???"

A parent who knows that their job is to raise a curious, open minded, informed judgement making person who ACTUALLY understand and can accept differences between people rather than just giving it lip service.




LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Would you if you could? (3/27/2008 7:43:25 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: katie978
Screaming across the store- "MASTER! You could totally spank us with this!!"-not cool in mine eyes.

For me it's the screaming that's inappropriate- no matter what you happen to be saying.  Saying "Master you could totally spank us with this" is no big deal to me.




IronBear -> RE: Would you if you could? (3/27/2008 7:46:07 PM)

G'day Twicehappy,

Wer'e open about our lifestyle choices both here and as Pagans. hell the entire town where we live knows we are both pagan and are involved with consensual slagvery and BDSM. How cou;ld they not when I've lead a collared slave on a leash shopping etc? people either show intgerest or ignor it, to datge none have tried to be confrontational other than a few Born-again christians who were porcably removed by me from my property and prosecuted for criminal trespass sucessfully. fmily may not like it but they respect our choices and do ask pertinant questions at times.

Iron Bear
Master of Bruin Cottage
(A Victorian Lifestyle poly home)

"I judge a Man by what I see him do and not by what others tell me he does."
(Captain Sir Edward Pellew of the HMS Indefatigable to Midshipman Hornblower ~ C.S. Forrester)





LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Would you if you could? (3/27/2008 7:46:37 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: batshalom
just like if I were a heterosexual monogamous traditional woman I wouldn't feel the need to disclose that either.

But if you are part of the overall mainstream culture, it's not "disclosure."  Heck, it's almost a ritual to parade around an engagement ring at the office once it's on.  But a collar?  Somehow that's "disclosure."




xxblushesxx -> RE: Would you if you could? (3/27/2008 7:56:20 PM)

Yes. If I could.




MissAngelandsub -> RE: Would you if you could? (3/27/2008 7:59:29 PM)

I told my best friend about it and I explained it to him since he is vanilla. I think about telling my mom but then I think that my husband is abusive or that I am twisted in some way and how she and my dad went wrong in raising me. I will probably one day tell her just haven't found the right time yet. My brother would probably go off on the same thinking as my mom and probably come to my house and forceably remove me. LOL but I have it listed in my myspace profile how I am and if anyone really wants to know all they have to do is look. Surprisingly none of my friends have said anything to me about it, but I feel this way if you can't accept me for everything then you aren't truly a friend anyway.




Lynnxz -> RE: Would you if you could? (3/27/2008 8:03:48 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz
I'd never casually flaunt what I do in front of people that probably don't want to hear it. What mom wants to hear, "Moommm? Why is that lady licking that man's boots in the fruit aisle???"

A parent who knows that their job is to raise a curious, open minded, informed judgement making person who ACTUALLY understand and can accept differences between people rather than just giving it lip service.


We live in the "bible belt" :( This town doesn't allow anything remotely adult, so maybe I'd run into more problems based on location




IronBear -> RE: Would you if you could? (3/27/2008 8:10:09 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissAngelandsub

I told my best friend about it and I explained it to him since he is vanilla. I think about telling my mom but then I think that my husband is abusive or that I am twisted in some way and how she and my dad went wrong in raising me. I will probably one day tell her just haven't found the right time yet. My brother would probably go off on the same thinking as my mom and probably come to my house and forceably remove me. LOL but I have it listed in my myspace profile how I am and if anyone really wants to know all they have to do is look. Surprisingly none of my friends have said anything to me about it, but I feel this way if you can't accept me for everything then you aren't truly a friend anyway.


I have to agree with you here. My mother tried to clone me to her aristocratic snobbish attitudes. She never forgave me for resigning the QAueen's Commision either and as I said, "If yhou try to clone me to be your immage, it shows you do not love me for myself but for my social value to you." My father applauded and her re[ly was to the effect that it was a pity that by brother wasn't the older as he'd be better suited to receive the heriditory stuff when her and my father were gone. Fiunny my brothert is closer to me and is just as kniky, lives out of the square and agbree with all my choices.... Parents, can't live with them and can't live with out them.

Iron Bear
Master of Bruin Cottage
(A Victorian Lifestyle poly home)

"I judge a Man by what I see him do and not by what others tell me he does."
(Captain Sir Edward Pellew of the HMS Indefatigable to Midshipman Hornblower ~ C.S. Forrester)





Daddyslilpookie -> RE: Would you if you could? (3/27/2008 8:27:11 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Noah

quote:

ORIGINAL: Twicehappy2x

 
Would you if you could?
 
If it were possible for your friends, family, neighbors, to know what type of lifestyle you live  ...


I don't live a lifestyle and I hope you don't either.

I live an actual life, and I hope you do too. Some of my life is public, some of it is private. I hope that altogether it reflects healthy psychological boundaries.

Don't you wish everybody's did?





I agree, I live an actual life too and Master's and my private life stay private, except for my closest girlfriends and my mom know. My mom is one of my best friend she knows and my other closest friends know that I am owned to my husband/Daddy but that's it. They dont know any of the juicy details, because that is for Master and I to know nobody else. I don't like to flaunt my personal business it is just plain tacky period end of report.




Poetryinpain -> RE: Would you if you could? (3/27/2008 8:34:44 PM)

I feel that what they don't know won't hurt them. When I find a Dom, all they (family and friends) will know is that I've found a man - finally. My roommate doesn't even know.

I truly believe my mother went to her grave thinking I was a virgin. I was 46 when she died - and certainly no virgin. My dad, I think, figured out I'd lost my virginity, but nothing else.

My private life is just that - private.




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