What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off?

What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (Full Version)

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GoddessTeaze -> What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (3/28/2008 6:56:28 AM)
What atracts you to a Dominant, and do you feel is truly importent?? & What is a total turn off for you ? I wish you all enough. Warm Greetingz GoddezzT`

OsideGirl -> RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (3/28/2008 7:15:44 AM)
There are a lot of things that are important to me in a mate. The early three turn offs are: -The guy that doesn't understand the difference between "domineering" and "dominant". -The guy that thinks he's somehow the exception. -The Uber-Dom There are others, but those three won't get past a two minute conversation with me.

chamberqueen -> RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (3/28/2008 7:35:38 AM)
When I was still an active Mistress I was told that what turned men on about me was my intelligence. Ironically, when these same men wrote back to once I became a slave they told me that they were sure I would be successful at it - because of my intelligence. [:)] Another thing I was told was a turn on, which is also helpful on both sides of the lifestyle, is my understanding of people and willingness to ask the right questions to get them to open up. For some it was my range of toys, for some my looks, but for most it was the combination of intelligence and a true caring for the person.

Shawn1066 -> RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (3/28/2008 7:38:43 AM)
Intelligence is a huge turn on. Arrogance is a huge turn off. A sense of humor is a huge turn on. A sense of superiority is a huge turn off. DV's Fox

sub4hire -> RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (3/28/2008 8:19:28 AM)
Intelligence and if I can watch them interact with others. The way they carry themselves. Two major issues that have to be there for me to have future interest.

OmegaG -> RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (3/28/2008 8:29:55 AM)
well put Fox. I am turned on my an open mind and conversely turned off by a closed one. In the past when I was looking, I tended to end contact quickly with those who inteded to mold me to be a replica of every person they'd had before. And I run from those who think that an s-type should not have an opinion.

littleone35 -> RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (3/28/2008 8:36:00 AM)
I will have to say intelligence also I want to be able to talk to my Master out of a scene as well as in one. Another huge turn on for me is confidence a man who is confident would have when i was looking get another look from me. A sense of humor is a real big turn on also. Turn offs well lack of intelligence, guys who think just cause they call themseles Masters i should fall at their feet. Poor grooming. Guys who think because i am submissive i should be submissive to all,as someones tag line says i am a submissive but not your submissive. Matt's littleone

BBWnNC72 -> RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (3/28/2008 8:44:43 AM)
The first thing i notice when i receive messages from some one is the grammar. i can not stand some one who doesn't take the time to spell out things. i really loath abbreviations. What attracts me to a Dominant? Humor, the ability to laugh and have a good time. It is not all about the "lifestyle" every minute of every day. There is always respect, but sheeesh people have fun too! Then the usual things like honesty, the ability to take care of themselves and having control of their own life. The one thing that turns me off right away? Bad, uncared for teeth. Then the "i am better then you are, because i am a Dominant"or "you must submit because you are a submissive".

TethersEnd -> RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (3/28/2008 8:45:53 AM)
Intelligence Confidence Humor Humility The Ability and Desire to Communicate of course there is also physical traits too. He Must carry himself well, take pride in his appearance. He also needs to have his life in working order, not perfection, but he has to be able to function in the Real World. edited to add the ucky stuff! it totally squicks me out when I have more confidence then they do. or when I have to explain big words. another thing that gets my attention is when they begin to sprout feathers if they think they got caught doing something they shouldnt. you know, that deer in the headlights look? then there's also that false bravado that puffs some up too large for their own good. I also cant stand a lack of follow through, a life screwed up more then mine is. But the worse has to be empty words.

tarnishdhaylo -> RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (3/28/2008 8:51:58 AM)
Humor intelligence Ability to communication and he must be a good kisser

Mercnbeth -> RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (3/28/2008 8:55:46 AM)
quote: What atracts you to a Dominant, and do you feel is truly importent?? self-knowledge, self-confidence, a keen sense of humor. quote: What is a total turn off for you ? a submissive posing as a Dom.

ownedgirlie -> RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (3/28/2008 8:59:22 AM)
quote: What atracts you to a Dominant, and do you feel is truly importent?? Power Intelligence Self Confidence Self Awareness Humor quote: What is a total turn off for you ? Uncertainty Lack of self awareness Being absent of any of the "turn-ons" listed above Edited to add, I suppose I could have just pointed to beth and said "Ditto" (Tried to fix quotes but they're winning the battle)

TreasureKY -> RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (3/28/2008 9:04:48 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: GoddessTeaze What atracts you to a Dominant, and do you feel is truly importent?? Common sense... it's so uncommon these days. [;)] Decisiveness, confidence and quick wit are also turn-ons, as well as intelligence. In addition to these, they must be truly dominant... none of this "I'll label myself as a dominant so I can get what I want but I really don't want to be responsible, in charge or make decisions". quote: ORIGINAL: GoddessTeaze What is a total turn off for you ? Lack of the above. Edited to correct quote formatting. quote: ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie (Tried to fix quotes but they're winning the battle) lol... I had the same problem.

Wheldrake -> RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (3/28/2008 12:08:21 PM)
In my world the most attractive qualities in a dominant are intelligence, humour, responsibility, decisiveness, open-mindedness, confidence, groundedness (a sense of being down-to-earth and realistic about things) and, of course, the absolute essentials of lust, sadism, a perverse imagination, and a capacity for delight in having power over a helpless piece of human property. One could hardly expect another human being to have all these qualities in abundance, but the more of them the better. Unattractive qualities are the opposites of the attractive ones, but particularly shrillness, prissiness, and superficiality. Beauty and physique are pretty much irrelevant. Looking back at what I've written, I see that most of the characteristics I've listed as attractive or unattractive apply to people in general - not just dominants.

DefiantFlower -> RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (3/28/2008 1:11:05 PM)
Turn ons... REAL confidence A piercing intellect that's always two steps ahead Sense of humor Playfulness Sensitivity Done in the right way, that yummy cocky patronizing tone of voice Muscle! Turn offs... Funky smells Poor personal hygiene (hair, teeth, etc) Life more fucked up than mine Faking anything...i can usually tell Incapable of respecting boundaries Shallowness Too much disorganization Pretty much any absence of the turn ons

softness -> RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (3/28/2008 1:19:20 PM)
Turn on Intelligence, wit, insight, perception, understanding what "classics" means, real life experience that has nothing to do with a BDSM but about actual LIFE, makes eye contact often and easily even with a lowly submissive, socially at ease. Turn offs Third person self referential, no sense of humour, bad breath, patronising, obviously more interesting in my tits than anything coming out of my mouth. but the aboslute hum dinger of a turn off CALLING ME LITTLE ONE!!!! ... am 5 foot fricken 10 ... My ass is the size of a small car... I AM NOT LITTLE!!! metaphorically, literally, OR OTHERWISE pants ... breathes... pants ... breathes ..... really needs to stop going to munches full of old men

Leatherist -> RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (3/28/2008 1:23:45 PM)
What,you mean these incredible and powerful masters don't turn you on? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vaeD9XFyWXo

Gleegal67 -> RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (3/28/2008 1:27:09 PM)
Attraction within the first 2 minutes... Smile Appearance Confidence Intellect Voice Sense of humor Turn-off within the first 2 seconds... Appearance - lack of hygiene Arrogance Lack of intellect Submissive in Wannabe Dominant Shell Grating Voice

sambamanslilgirl -> RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (3/28/2008 1:42:57 PM)
turn offs are much simplier for me to discuss. i don't like dominants who display lack of communication skills and manners; who demand instant play session/submission and who don't understand there needs to be trust, compatialbity and communication as a foundation to build a relationship. Daddy's the direct opposite and more - it's why we're able to connect instantly almost 2 yrs ago

gallowmere -> RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? (3/28/2008 2:05:46 PM)
The first thing I notice is intelliegence, intelect, wit, whatever you want to call it. That piercing just sort of... passive understanding. I consider myself very bright, and very witty, and when I find someone who easily beats me at my own little game, it will instantly get my attention.

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