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RE: The Catch 22 of BDSM - 4/3/2008 6:50:21 PM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
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I loved that movie-this scene stood out.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5bjBAez9cm4&feature=related

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RE: The Catch 22 of BDSM - 4/3/2008 7:00:51 PM   
bipolarber


Posts: 2792
Joined: 9/25/2004
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I'm just glad someone has the guts to post obvious information on the site. Without it, we'd all be doing exactly the same thing anyway...  ;)


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RE: The Catch 22 of BDSM - 4/3/2008 7:04:58 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
Ok.  I read three pages of this to go right back and agree with the first response.  (Ty, Aileen.)

I do not have aileen's wonderful good looks.  I am certainly not the most skilled Domme on the boards.  (I'm not bad, but there is always someone better.)  I do casual play and I'm not looking for a relationship.    Yet, still somehow, I've never been stood up by anyone from CM who made the arrangement to meet Me, even when there was no play planned.  Between here and alt, I've met at least a hundred people online (I didn't play with all of them) before I met them in real life.  Every one of them were exacly where they said they would be, when they said they would be.

My approach doesn't have any special trick.  I don't entice anyone with anything other than the opportunity to say hello.  I think that people just know I'm sincere in the things I write, and I'm not looking to use anyone who doesn't want to be.

Quite simple really.

Oh, yeah, plus there's the fact that I'm female.


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RE: The Catch 22 of BDSM - 4/3/2008 9:35:57 PM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: scottjk

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

Speak for yourself.  I haven't followed a single one of your rules and have had no problem with people showing up or with my safety.  Look at the common denominator in your issues...you? 

edited to add missing words


Wow, Aileen. Feeling a bit hostile for some reason? His point was that meeting people isn't as dangerous as many posters would like you to think. It's easy to create fear. It's easy to talk about what could go wrong, or badly. It's easy to point to the news to validate that fear. It's easy to say, "Once is enough." It's hard to say possible is different from inevitable. He's pointing out that with sensible precautions, you can meet a lot of good honorable people without fear. It's sad to see that your only response is not support, but a sneering condescending reply that appears that you're only interested in an argument.

I support what he says wholeheartedly, no one should allow fear to ensure that you never meet people and improve your chances of meeting some one you could spend your life with.

Why so hostile about what he said?




Actually, I wasn't being hostile at all.  It was morning and the coffee hadn't entered my bloodstream yet.  I forgot to add a  to my post.  Most people here know that I tend to write bluntly.  This is even wordy for me.
What I meant to do was to point out that there's is no right or wrong way to do anything...meet, play, whatever.  Whatever works for two people at the moment is their right way.

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RE: The Catch 22 of BDSM - 4/3/2008 9:42:04 PM   
subtee


Posts: 5133
Joined: 7/26/2007
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Damn lotta words, Aileen. What the hell?

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Profile   Post #: 65
RE: The Catch 22 of BDSM - 4/3/2008 9:43:51 PM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline
Ha!

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RE: The Catch 22 of BDSM - 4/3/2008 9:46:58 PM   
subtee


Posts: 5133
Joined: 7/26/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

Ha!


That's more like it, ya zexy beazt ya


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Profile   Post #: 67
RE: The Catch 22 of BDSM - 4/4/2008 11:19:49 PM   
scottjk


Posts: 335
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

quote:

ORIGINAL: scottjk

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

Speak for yourself.  I haven't followed a single one of your rules and have had no problem with people showing up or with my safety.  Look at the common denominator in your issues...you? 

edited to add missing words


Wow, Aileen. Feeling a bit hostile for some reason? His point was that meeting people isn't as dangerous as many posters would like you to think. It's easy to create fear. It's easy to talk about what could go wrong, or badly. It's easy to point to the news to validate that fear. It's easy to say, "Once is enough." It's hard to say possible is different from inevitable. He's pointing out that with sensible precautions, you can meet a lot of good honorable people without fear. It's sad to see that your only response is not support, but a sneering condescending reply that appears that you're only interested in an argument.

I support what he says wholeheartedly, no one should allow fear to ensure that you never meet people and improve your chances of meeting some one you could spend your life with.

Why so hostile about what he said?




Actually, I wasn't being hostile at all.  It was morning and the coffee hadn't entered my bloodstream yet.  I forgot to add a  to my post.  Most people here know that I tend to write bluntly.  This is even wordy for me.
What I meant to do was to point out that there's is no right or wrong way to do anything...meet, play, whatever.  Whatever works for two people at the moment is their right way.


(hands Aileen a pez dispenser full of smileys)

Well, then I stand better informed. Still, he does make a point. I prefer to set up a meet for dinner or coffee with something interesting to do, say... a show of some kind, or even flying a goofy kite for that matter, so long as it's public, and you both like each other's profiles, why not? It certainly harder to hide your flaws in person than it is online, wouldn't you think? And it gets you out of the house for an evening with a high potential that you'd actually have fun.



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RE: The Catch 22 of BDSM - 4/5/2008 5:52:36 AM   
Gemini1766


Posts: 991
Joined: 3/7/2008
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scottjk, I'd point you to the thread I created in respons to this one, "Ideas for first fact to face meetings". All kinds of responses there and many did not bother with any such rules and have been in successful D/s relationships for multiple years.

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(in reply to scottjk)
Profile   Post #: 69
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