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How do i find a Dom? - 10/7/2005 9:05:26 AM   
freshmeat666


Posts: 3
Joined: 6/15/2005
Status: offline 		I'm new to this and am trying to join the lifestyle but it seems like there are no doms.
I just want to experience it and see if its right for me(which i'm almost positive it is). But i can't find a dom. Can anybody help me or tell me what i'm doing wrong?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: How do i find a Dom? - 10/7/2005 9:07:27 AM   
EmeraldSlave2


Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		I'm sure you will have more offers than you can handle from doms who can't wait to get into your pant....I mean help you gain your footing.

My advice to all novices is to NOT get into a committed relationship for at least 6 months.

No one ever listens to that, but I think it's good advice.

NJ has a tepid scene, a few munches and a few parties, but NYC has great stuff for ya.

(in reply to freshmeat666)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: How do i find a Dom? - 10/7/2005 9:28:30 AM   
ZandD


Posts: 59
Joined: 1/24/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: EmeraldSlave2

I'm sure you will have more offers than you can handle from doms who can't wait to get into your pant....I mean help you gain your footing.

My advice to all novices is to NOT get into a committed relationship for at least 6 months.

No one ever listens to that, but I think it's good advice.

NJ has a tepid scene, a few munches and a few parties, but NYC has great stuff for ya.


I agree with Emerald Slave and she gives really sound advice. It takes a long time on both ends of the spectrum to not only find but ultimately trust a person in this realm. Love at first sight (or message) is a fun dream to indulge in but in reality it can be frought with disaster.

My advice to you is: Don't settle for meeting your immediate needs. Consider your longterm needs and goals and don't settle for less. It's difficult to wait, but holding out for "The Right One" versus "The Right Now One" can save on emotional turmoil and can help ensure your physical and mental safety.

These are all simply suggestions. In any case, it is always a good idea to err on the side of caution.

Good fortune to you!

Z

_____________________________

[image]http://tmoa.org/help/common/images/letters/color/z.gif[/image][image]http://www.realestatematters.com/graphics/ampersand.gif[/image][image]http://microarrays.unife.it/dama/areax/D.gif[/image]

Onward and Upward



(in reply to EmeraldSlave2)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: How do i find a Dom? - 10/7/2005 10:20:50 AM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

I'm new to this and am trying to join the lifestyle but it seems like there are no doms.
I just want to experience it and see if its right for me(which i'm almost positive it is). But i can't find a dom. Can anybody help me or tell me what i'm doing wrong?


Why do you think the lifestyle is for you? What does it have to offer you? What do you have to offer it?

Assuming you have taken the time to truly get to know you, deep within. The lifestyle is for you. What are you seeking? A play partner so you can get experience or a dom?
What sort of relationship?
Love takes time, lust is instant gratification.
I looked at your profile because your photo is so dark and so far away it was hard to tell if you were male or female.
An 18 year old male. Fem doms are very hard to find. They are out there...but extremely hard to find. Since you are at such a youthful age I'm also thinking some may have issues taking you on. They may assume you aren't sure what you are seeking..etc..etc. Their excuses could go on and on.
Although some would be incredibly happy to have you on their arms at parties...so it works against you and with you at the same time.
Regardless what you are seeking is a very small commodity, experienced subs get frustrated. So, chances are you are doing nothing wrong.
The only thing I can suggest is really get to know yourself and what you are seeking. Paint a portrait of that to all potentials.
Then go out to munches and parties. Get to know others in the scene offline.
Could'nt hurt to read, read and read some more as well. No dom should complain that you have worked on yourself while waiting for them to enter your life.
Good Luck.

(in reply to freshmeat666)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: How do i find a Dom? - 10/7/2005 10:23:48 AM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		No one should be asking you for money either.






Attachment (1)

(in reply to freshmeat666)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: How do i find a Dom? - 10/7/2005 10:33:12 AM   
perfection20005


Posts: 419
Joined: 4/20/2005
Status: offline 		Give yourself some time. You don't go on a vanilla site and hope to be married to someone in a week. The lifestyle has a lot of great things to offer, but take baby steps into it.
And I also agree with Emerald on this too. She does offer some great advice.

_____________________________

perfection

"I took one look at Him, and I knew He was my Master."

(in reply to freshmeat666)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: How do i find a Dom? - 10/7/2005 10:46:33 AM   
ownedjulia


Posts: 218
Joined: 10/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: perfection20005

Give yourself some time. You don't go on a vanilla site and hope to be married to someone in a week. The lifestyle has a lot of great things to offer, but take baby steps into it.
And I also agree with Emerald on this too. She does offer some great advice.


That she does.

I knew about the lifestyle for over 10 years before I decided to take the plunge and that was on;y because i found vanilla relationships boring!

When I did take the plunge I did what I normally do for anything involving a new situation... I read.
I read everything I could on various sites. I asked some questions. I attended a couple of munches and play parties.
Then I read more and asked MORE questions.

It still didn't stop me from hooking up with a 'Master' who was so wrong for me it was stupid but I recognised the danger signs fairly quickly and got out of it.

The second important thing about getting to know people in the scene LONG before getting involved with anyone was that I made severall really good sub/slave friends that I could talk to and who were on the lookout for me.

Without them I would have given the whole thing up as a joke.

Take your time. Your 18 - You have PLENTY of time to learn!!



< Message edited by ownedjulia -- 10/7/2005 10:50:01 AM >

_____________________________

~julia
owned slave and proud of it!

(in reply to perfection20005)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: How do i find a Dom? - 10/7/2005 11:55:24 AM   
fastlane


Posts: 2159
Joined: 5/26/2005
Status: offline 		We're a Dom a Dozen, so I find it difficult to understand why you can't find one?

I'm sure you will soon, but be careful what you wish for.. You're new, so be careful and be selective, get to know the person you intend on becoming involved with before setting up a meeting.

Good luck lil grasshopper, and always play safe.



_____________________________

Just because it hurts, doesn't necessarily make it a bad thing.

(in reply to ownedjulia)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: How do i find a Dom? - 10/7/2005 1:58:32 PM   
RainGod


Posts: 230
Joined: 7/11/2005
From: Hendersonville, NC
Status: offline 		freshmeat666 posted:

quote:

I'm new to this and am trying to join the lifestyle but it seems like there are no doms.


Are ya kidding Me? the Men here outnumber the women ten to one....

quote:

I just want to experience it and see if its right for me(which i'm almost positive it is). But i can't find a dom. Can anybody help me or tell me what i'm doing wrong?


Maybe you aren't doing anything wrong. If the reason you haven't found One yet is because none seem to match what you want or need, then I would say you are being selective. That's about a million miles from doing anything wrong. Have faith, look diligently, and the time will come when He may find you... right when you least expect it.

_____________________________

Love is a razor & I walk the line on that silver blade... slept in the dust with His daughter her eyes red with the slaughter of innocence... The evil that men do lives on & on.
~ Iron Maiden

(in reply to freshmeat666)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: How do i find a Dom? - 10/7/2005 2:05:42 PM   
JohnWarren


Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RainGod

freshmeat666 posted:

quote:

I'm new to this and am trying to join the lifestyle but it seems like there are no doms.


Are ya kidding Me? the Men here outnumber the women ten to one....


This triggered my "fact check gene" since from the syntax I'd thought the OP was male. Turns out I was right.

To the OP:

Just a few things, why in the world did you chose your screen name. It seems to be calculated to offend a significant number of your target audience. If they aren't Christian, they probably be put off by the passive connotation of the rest of the name.

You are NOT into everything. No one is. Just saying that will put off most experienced dominants. Be honest. Say what you are interested in and what are your hard limits.

The picture is kinda dark and hard to make out. You can do better.

_____________________________

www.lovingdominant.org

(in reply to RainGod)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: How do i find a Dom? - 10/7/2005 2:08:18 PM   
MeisterGeek


Posts: 24
Joined: 9/21/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: fastlane

We're a Dom a Dozen, so I find it difficult to understand why you can't find one?



Okay, that was just bad ... or are you just perfecting a new form of punishment that might well violate the Geneva Conventions?

MG

(in reply to fastlane)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: How do i find a Dom? - 10/7/2005 2:15:05 PM   
JustaTop


Posts: 511
Joined: 10/5/2005
Status: offline 		It's easy,be yourself,and have more than your elbows to put on the table in offering.

(in reply to freshmeat666)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: How do i find a Dom? - 10/7/2005 2:33:29 PM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

The picture is kinda dark and hard to make out. You can do better.


That is why I cropped and lightened it for him...then posted it back here again.

Sometimes we all need a little help now and then.

(in reply to JohnWarren)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: How do i find a Dom? - 10/7/2005 2:46:35 PM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline 		Just take your time and relax no rush is there? Also be very catious whrn you do meet someone don't be so eager to be with a Dom you take the first one who shows an interest make sure he is the right one fo you.
r
littleone

(in reply to freshmeat666)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: How do i find a Dom? - 10/7/2005 3:45:12 PM   
JohnWarren


Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sub4hire

quote:

The picture is kinda dark and hard to make out. You can do better.


That is why I cropped and lightened it for him...then posted it back here again.

Sometimes we all need a little help now and then.



[grin] It's nice to have geek friends... I married mine.

_____________________________

www.lovingdominant.org

(in reply to sub4hire)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: How do i find a Dom? - 10/7/2005 5:07:46 PM   
RainGod


Posts: 230
Joined: 7/11/2005
From: Hendersonville, NC
Status: offline 		sub4hire said:

quote:

No one should be asking you for money either.


...fifty, fifty-five, sixty-five....damn.

Hey, sub4hire.... ya got a quarter? lol

_____________________________

Love is a razor & I walk the line on that silver blade... slept in the dust with His daughter her eyes red with the slaughter of innocence... The evil that men do lives on & on.
~ Iron Maiden

(in reply to sub4hire)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: How do i find a Dom? - 10/7/2005 5:14:15 PM   
fastlane


Posts: 2159
Joined: 5/26/2005
Status: offline 		DomsRus?

(in reply to RainGod)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: How do i find a Dom? - 10/7/2005 9:35:23 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

Just a few things, why in the world did you chose your screen name. It seems to be calculated to offend a significant number of your target audience. If they aren't Christian, they probably be put off by the passive connotation of the rest of the name.
I would say that name is probably not working in your favor; aside from that agree with everything else you've been told here. M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to freshmeat666)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: How do i find a Dom? - 10/12/2005 2:01:25 PM   
NorthernNJSub


Posts: 3
Joined: 10/12/2005
Status: offline 		I would like to thank everyone for the advice, i just changed my username and my photo(thanks for fixing my picture, sub4hire).
I'll be happy to wait for the "right one" since now i know it's not only me waiting.
Thanks again!
Formally know as Freshmeat666

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: How do i find a Dom? - 10/22/2005 11:43:17 AM   
alex1234


Posts: 2
Joined: 10/17/2005
Status: offline

Hi my name is DOM Alexander and I would like you to start corresponding with me on a daily basis and I will be more than willing to introduce you to the lifestyle, BUT, the first thing is we will have to get to know each other as individuals for starters. So do you mind telling me more about yourself

Alex

(in reply to freshmeat666)
Profile   Post #: 20
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