MadRabbit
Posts: 3460
Joined: 8/9/2006 Status: offline
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Just as a warning, I predict I will be ruffling a few feathers with this as I do with most of the topics I choose to start. Time and time again, both online and in real time, I see the same recurring perspective that people who are involved in BDSM or D/S or M/S won't be accepted by "vanilla" people or in some cases, persecuted by them. I don't buy this nor do I believe it. It simply isn't consistent with my experiences with people. I'm not a true believer in anything and I am not the kind of person who only surrounds himself with like-minded individuals. I like people who have different opinions then me and don't see things the same way. The different perspectives provide new ideas and force me to think about things in a different way. I've had the pleasure of befriending a wide variety of individuals including... D, the blue collar contractor with a neurotic disdain for homosexuals T, the Southern conservative with a belief in traditional values A, the hardcore Christian girl with fundamental Christian beliefs B, the old school chef who still thinks married couples should keep separate beds C, the hardcore feminist All of these people and several more are fully aware that I am a sadistic dominant who enjoys controlling women and am mildly involved in organized groups with members involved in a large variety of alternative and deviant lifestyles and all these people are still my friends. I attribute this to something that took me awhile to fully learn and realize. Whoever has the strongest perspective of their reality will dominate. If you believe that you are pathetic, then you are pathetic. If you believe that you are confident, then you are confident. If you believe that the things that you do are sick, wrong, or bad, then they are sick, wrong, and bad and other people will sense it and see it and they will believe that about you, too. From what I have experienced, its really how all that shit works. There is nothing more to confidence and acceptance then that. How the majority of people treat you depends on your attitude. I've pretty much heard it all at this point. I'm sick, I'm fucked up, I'm a freak, I'm a macho sexist, I'm destroying the feminist movement, I need to get psychological counseling to "cure" myself.... However, by not allowing them to subvert, convert, or change my perspective on my reality and not doubting myself and what I knew to be true, their initial reactions eventually passed. At that point, curiosity and a lot of questions tended to follow. I have not lost a single "vanilla" friend due to not being "normal". They make jokes and they make fun of me, but I'm laughing right along with them. Or as my buddy put it..."Well, fuck...I know your a good guy, so all that shit can't be that bad if your doing it." The point that I am getting at is I don't find that in this day in the age the notion of persecution and non-acceptance is something that is grounded in reality. It's not the average person out there who has a problem with BDSM or M/S, but rather the people into BDSM or M/S who have a problem with BDSM or M/S. This perspective that is presented is a result of people being insecure or ashamed of what they do and projecting that as some external threat that everyone needs to be afraid of. I'm not trying to tell people how to life their lives or suggesting that you go out tomorrow and tell your boss or walk into a bar, throw your hands in the air, and scream "HEY, I LIKE TO BE DRESSED IN DIAPERS AND BE SPANKED!". This is simply my experiences with dealing vanilla people and my opinion based on those experiences. I look forward to hearing whether you agree or disagree.
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Advice for New Dominants The Unpolitically Correct Lifestyle Definitions Obama is NOT the Messiah! He's just a VERY NAUGHTY BOY
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