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LadiesBladewing -> RE: Y/you, A/all, U/us (10/13/2005 1:25:46 PM)
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I think I hear what you're saying (and what Emerald was likely trying to stress as well), and I think that you are right. I think that it is the same reason that we don't use this tool with every servant, and why we are constantly observing attitude and demeanor in those we -do- use it with, to assure that our goals are being met. *Warm smile as I go on*
It seems to me that you are stressing that it isn't the type of word, or the style of speaking that is the issue, but the speaker's -intention- when using a word. Like the people who say "I'm sorry", and it clearly means "You are such a stupid f*cking jackass, but I -have- to kiss your butt, so here's the "sorry" you are obviously expecting.", and I agree. I've seen this so many times, as if it is just the talk that makes the difference between an outstanding servant and a mediocre, careless servant.
To address issues raised by a few of the other speakers thus far, I don't know that my servants need to necessarily know -why- I am asking them to use a certain style of speech...and sometimes, the reason is nothing more than I'm tired of them running their mouths, and if I enforce 3rd-person speech, it will make it more difficult for them to talk... and sometimes, it is just because I -like- hearing my servants speak that way at times...it tickles my fancy. But no matter the reason, I expect them to speak the way that I require, and to do so with dignity and with grace...and I expect that they will make no apologies for my commands on my behalf, because they are speaking that way because I asked for it, and that is nothing to apologize for. But it is important for -me- to know why, since I am the one who is commanding it, and the only one who can ascertain if the desired purpose is being served. If my purpose is to hear my servants speak that "cool 3rd person speech", that should be good enough for my servants, and, frankly, if another owner wants hir servants/subs/slaves to stand on their heads and whistle "Dixie", unless I have some input into how they run their household, it shouldn't make two bits worth of difference to me. I can only address -my- motives with any kind of certainty, and I don't think my servants should have to read my mind to figure out why. I -may- choose to share (and -I- often do, as that is my nature), but it shouldn't be a requirement, and as long as they do what they're told, they should know that they are ok, and that doing what their owner tells them is enough.
Lady Zephyr
quote:
ORIGINAL: ImpGrrl
I understand where you are coming from - and agree. But I also have had similar conversations with Emerald, and believe I can interpret what she is saying.
Often, the use of third person by an s-type is absolutely no different in meaning than the use of first person. Their use of "she" and "her" are simply word-replacements for "I" and "my". This is where the pronouns still have possessive meaning - because they are still used that way.
In its "proper" use ("proper" meaning intentional and focus-driven, as you've described its use), it takes that possessive away, it helps create mindfulness, etc etc.
But in many s-types' use - it doesn't really serve that purpose. It isn't about being mindful, or focus-driven - it's about being slavely. And often, it's about being "slavlier-than-thou".
Yes, it's possible to use these things for the nobler purpose. But most often - they're not.
Again, I'm with Liz that "the owner wants me to" is reason enough - annoying to me or not. And I'm with you that they can be useful as teaching tools.
But I assert that, in someone not really interested in learning, it simply becomes a substitution of language, and means nothing - and often helps one show off a bit.
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