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The "Domme Vibe" - 10/10/2005 10:40:09 PM

Misstoyou

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I was talking to a sub friend of mine about meeting a very submissive new teacher at my otherwise boring teacher training day. I couldn't pick up a bottle of water without him asking if I wanted him to open it for me. lol My friend's reply was "Clearly picked up the Domme vibe."

So I said, "Tell me about the "Domme Vibe," and he gave me some examples, including "How they say "please" but mean "do this" and "How they say "thank you" but mean "you met my expectations"," which made me laugh because that's my teaching style in a nutshell.

Does anyone have any other examples of what sets off the "Domme vibe," or stories of how you've responded to it when you've picked it up unexpectedly in a vanilla situation?

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RE: The "Domme Vibe" - 10/11/2005 4:19:53 AM

EmeraldSlave2

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Sure happens all the time.

The important thing to remember is that a vibe or personality does not at all indicate a necessary orientation or compatibility.

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RE: The "Domme Vibe" - 10/11/2005 6:20:17 AM

Mercnbeth

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quote:

Does anyone have any other examples of what sets off the "Domme vibe,"

this slave had the uncomfortable experience of someone insinuating their submissiveness in her direction~he did not "pick up on a Domme vibe", he wished it was there so much he acted like it was. he called late one night begging for this slave to tie him up and step on his balls with high heels on. this slave said "dude, up to this point we have been friends, how come you haven't been sharing whatever it is you must be on right now or have you sincerely lost your mind?"

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RE: The "Domme Vibe" - 10/11/2005 6:53:22 AM

lonewolf05

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i am merely guessing here...not having experienced it first hand...

but body language...walking style..eye contact...etc etc

i know of SOME women...that domme comes out of their pores...and i know some..like MY Ms that you wouldn't know ity w/o asking.

but i am merely guessing.

woofie

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RE: The "Domme Vibe" - 10/11/2005 7:23:59 AM

plantlady64

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quote:

Does anyone have any other examples of what sets off the "Domme vibe," or stories of how you've responded to it when you've picked it up unexpectedly in a vanilla situation?

Hello There,
As I've said in many places I live my life wide open to the fact I'm kinky. As I live out in the open about my preferences, my loving Master who’s been in the closet 25 years decided to come out to.o
One of my Masters friends since childhood just found out my Master was kinky over the summer. His friend is a very dominating guy. I kept telling him I thought he should check things out as I really felt like it's a part of who he is already. I gave him my Screw The Roses Give Me The Thorns book to look over.
Two weeks later he says he could have written a book like that. He’s opened up to more of the sensation play now and he’s got a slave in TX he visits.. It was a very powerful thing for him to find the Dom inside and allow those types of encounters in his life.

I also have one of my girlfriends who once I told her about finding out I liked S&M decided to check it out too. She's always been aggressive and her becoming curious about my life made the Domme in her click on full tilt too.

I think some people have these urges & Dom/sub natures firmly in their hearts, but just have no concept of our lifestyle or how to open up to it. Once they talk to someone else who've opened their kinky side it draws them into what they wanted all along and didn't know how to find it before.
Sincerely,

sub suzanne

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RE: The "Domme Vibe" - 10/11/2005 3:00:37 PM

NakedOnMyChain

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quote:

Does anyone have any other examples of what sets off the "Domme vibe," or stories of how you've responded to it when you've picked it up unexpectedly in a vanilla situation?

Yes! Many times, actually, with many different people. The most memorable experience is from a former friend, we'll call him "Blane". It's not a "domme" vibe, since he's male, but it still works. Blane was a tall man, with a formidable countenance. He didn't say please, and rarely said thank you. His demeanor towards everyone was one of command. I picked up on the dominant vibe immediately. It never bothered me much until he tried to make a move on me one night, which turned into basically an order to fuck him. I wasn't interested, since he tends to come off as a pompous ass sometimes, and told him I wasn't interested on no uncertain terms. Unfortunately, one of my other friends let slip that I'm a submissive and into the lifestyle. He picked the chase back up immediately, with a passion. I stood firm in my answer that friendship was all I wanted from him. His advances got more and more forceful. He even went so far as to grab my hair from behind me and start grinding up against me. That was the point where I snapped. I screamed "What the hell is wrong with you?!", and told him that when I say no, I mean it. He said that he assumed, since I was submissive that I would be interested, and that he thought I was just playing coy. I told him I don't play games, I say what I mean. After that he started being more polite to people in general, but especially me. I guess it gave him perspective on things (that it's ok to be dominant, it's not ok to be an arrogant prick). We were good friends for a while after that, until he moved out of state. He turned into a pretty decent guy. He definitely had the strongest aura of dominance in anyone I've ever met, though.

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RE: The "Domme Vibe" - 10/11/2005 4:07:49 PM

Misstoyou

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quote:

ORIGINAL: EmeraldSlave2

Sure happens all the time.

The important thing to remember is that a vibe or personality does not at all indicate a necessary orientation or compatibility.

So true, and as beth's story has shown, wishful thinking could have a lot to do with it, too. lol
But now I think I like "aura of dominance" (thanks to NakedOnMyChain) even better than "vibe".

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RE: The "Domme Vibe" - 10/11/2005 9:00:37 PM

brightspot

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quote:

Does anyone have any other examples of what sets off the "Domme vibe," or stories of how you've responded to it when you've picked it up unexpectedly in a vanilla situation?

I don't really recall specific's, but I catch the "Domina Vibe" a lot.
Infact it is something, I feel very intuned to and I love it when I spot them.

*Brightspot

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RE: The "Domme Vibe" - 10/11/2005 9:33:37 PM

AAkasha

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Misstoyou

I was talking to a sub friend of mine about meeting a very submissive new teacher at my otherwise boring teacher training day. I couldn't pick up a bottle of water without him asking if I wanted him to open it for me. lol My friend's reply was "Clearly picked up the Domme vibe."

So I said, "Tell me about the "Domme Vibe," and he gave me some examples, including "How they say "please" but mean "do this" and "How they say "thank you" but mean "you met my expectations"," which made me laugh because that's my teaching style in a nutshell.

Does anyone have any other examples of what sets off the "Domme vibe," or stories of how you've responded to it when you've picked it up unexpectedly in a vanilla situation?

You have to be very careful with this. I can't tell you how many subs have come to me for advice because they married a woman who they thought was sexy, demanding, controlling, etc. -- and thought that meant there was a 'femdom' deep down waiting to get out . They found out later that she was just that -- demanding, controlling, perhaps a bit bitchy. But kinky? No way. In fact, she was more adamant about NOT playing his kinky games because she controlled what went on in the bedroom, and it sure as hell wasn't going to be HIS kinky fantasy world.

Some women are simply controlling. You may find yourself attracted to that in a submissive sort of way, but remember that domineering does not equal "femdom." She might be bossy and like to get her way. This does not mean she will someday channel that energy into controlling your orgasms or playing tease and denial games with you.

You might really find out she's just into getting her way -- and likes to boss men around. And the minute she finds out you get turned on by it, she won't be doing it just to please you.

The "femdom vibe" is something else entirely. I suggest looking for women that are playfully controlling, are open minded, adventurous, self confident, sensual. I think the most important distinction between a control freak and a sensual femdom are the way she may express it (if you are talking about hints in public). A femdom may be playfully manipulative or cooly assertive, but not insecure. A control freak may be rigid, unyielding, uncompromising and anal retentive.

Those are just my opinions of course. Just keep in mind -- what comes in a "femdom package" on the outside might not be the real deal inside; she may want *nothing* to do with kink, even though her personality may scream it. Or, she may be intensely kinky -- as a submissive in the bedroom.

Akasha

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RE: The "Domme Vibe" - 10/11/2005 10:24:57 PM

Evanesce

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quote:

Does anyone have any other examples of what sets off the "Domme vibe,"

Master and I went to a Master/slave weekend retreat not quite a year ago. We arrived early Friday afternoon, settled in, and while He sat in the library talking with the owner of the B&B we were visiting, I picked up a book and sat down to read in the parlor. About half an hour later, another couple arrived. Since they were checking in, I did not speak to them. Later that evening, when everyone had arrived, we went around the room and introduced ourselves. The couple who had come in while I was reading were rather taken aback when Master introduced me as His slave. They both stated they'd thought I was a Domme. Neither of us could quite figure this one out, since they'd had no real contact with me at all up to that point. Guess it was that "Domme vibe."

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RE: The "Domme Vibe" - 10/12/2005 7:08:28 AM

pollux

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Misstoyou

Does anyone have any other examples of what sets off the "Domme vibe," or stories of how you've responded to it when you've picked it up unexpectedly in a vanilla situation?

A female boss I used to work for came up to me one day and said, "I have fantasies about filming a music video where I'm a Dominatrix, strutting around above everybody, whipping all of you guys".

For my birthday one year she organized a scavenger hunt thing, and at the end the final task was for me to get on all fours and crawl backwards into her office.

She didn't give off a Domme "vibe" so much. It was more like a blast wave.

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RE: The "Domme Vibe" - 10/12/2005 7:58:23 PM

Misstoyou

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quote:

ORIGINAL: pollux

For my birthday one year she organized a scavenger hunt thing, and at the end the final task was for me to get on all fours and crawl backwards into her office.

She didn't give off a Domme "vibe" so much. It was more like a blast wave.

So did you do it? (Nice visual, btw) And why did you ever leave that job?

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RE: The "Domme Vibe" - 10/13/2005 2:01:11 AM

sf-Sub

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The Domme vibe can come from different things such as clothes, shoes (or rather boots), necklace, jewelry, hand/body language, the way she holds herself, her walk, hair style, key ring and belt she has on all could or not give a vibe.

All this without a word be spoken. Now her directness and indirect comments give a bit more if she is in the mood and indicating.

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RE: The "Domme Vibe" - 10/13/2005 6:29:49 AM

pollux

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