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BitaTruble -> RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Question for those with 10+ yrs exp. (4/22/2008 12:51:02 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: lostsoulskitten
I was going to toss this up to the other Masters and Mistresses first, before tossing the same question to the submissives.
We have browsed something over 6,000+ profiles on collarme, on girls 18-21. There seems to be a interesting rift.
60% want a master/Mistress closer to their age, about 10% want ones of other ethnic background, the other 30 % want ones old enough to be their grandparents.
It seems as soon as I hit the age of 32, I hit some invisible little void that sucked me right in. Girls beg for ones with experience, but as soon as a true real life Top with over 15 years experience messages, them even a simple hello, they delete profile instantly or never bother writing back. A few have, but not many. Usually we get as a couple, oh he's too old, too fat or she is, etc. The lovely ones who are judgemental.
At the same time, if you are nice and respectful to one, they consider it a sign of weakness and the Top does not have the "balls" to train them and be strict. On the other hand there are the ones who rush in without knowing what they are getting into and start chasing the predators and get abused and tortured.
I don't understand it sometimes. Age is only a small factor in the overall picture. I would think most would jump on the experienced trainers and Tops. Experience should be just as important if not more.
Have others seen this huge rift on collarme and other adult sites as well?
It's probably not your age. 35 is prime, so look at what other factors might be involved. The hottest commodity on the market is a beta female (especially a very young beta), so they have the luxury of picking and choosing. It's that supply and demand thing going on. You have to present as outstanding and any little thing is going to get you put into the trash heap along with all the rest who are seeking their attention. I'm not saying it's fair, but it's probably very realistic.
Keep looking or, better yet, concentrate on each other and growing in the dynamic you currently have and don't worry so much about finding a third. You two haven't been together all that long yet so there are probably a lot of things which you are still discovering about each other. You've noted in your sig line that you are about to be wed.. that's a major turn off for a lot of betas. You're going to be a newlywed and looking to add someone to the household right off the bat and a beta is probably going to be a bit skittish in thinking they will have a place in such a new life. Get some stability with what you have under your belt first, get a routine into place and then put out what you both desire and what you both offer. Be patient, take your time, be selective in who you contact making sure they meet all your criteria and you meet theirs at the initial stages and perhaps you'll fair better as a result. What you are doing right now is obviously not working, so you need to change your tack. 6000+ women can't all be wrong .. so it's got to be you.
Good luck,
Celeste
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