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Mid life crisis or just a low? Question for those with ... - 4/22/2008 11:50:13 AM   
lostsoulskitten


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I was going to toss this up to the other Masters and Mistresses first, before tossing the same question to the submissives.

We have browsed something over 6,000+ profiles on collarme, on girls 18-21.  There seems to be a interesting rift.

60% want a master/Mistress closer to their age, about 10% want ones of other ethnic background, the other 30 % want ones old enough to be their grandparents.

It seems as soon as I hit the age of 32, I hit some invisible little void that sucked me right in.   Girls beg for ones with experience, but as soon as a true real life Top with over 15 years experience messages, them even a simple hello, they delete profile instantly or never bother writing back.  A few have, but not many.  Usually we get as a couple, oh he's too old, too fat or she is, etc. The lovely ones who are judgemental.

At the same time, if you are nice and respectful to one, they consider it a sign of weakness and the Top does not have the "balls" to train them and be strict. On the other hand there are the ones who rush in without knowing what they are getting into and start chasing the predators and get abused and tortured.

I don't understand it sometimes. Age is only a small factor in the overall picture.  I would think most would jump on the experienced trainers and Tops. Experience should be just as important if not more. 


Have others seen this huge rift on collarme and other adult sites as well?

< Message edited by lostsoulskitten -- 4/22/2008 11:56:58 AM >


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RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Questionf or those w... - 4/22/2008 11:58:25 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
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quote:

ORIGINAL: lostsoulskitten

I was going to toss this up to the other Masters and Mistresses first, before tossing the same question to the submissives.

We have browsed something over 6,000+ profiles on collarme, on girls 18-21.  There seems to be a interesting rift.

60% want a master/Mistress closer to their age, about 10% want ones of other ethnic background, the other 30 % want ones old enough to be their grandparents.

It seems as soon as I hit the age of 32, I hit some invisible little void that sucked me right in.   Girls beg for ones with experience, but as soon as a true real life Top with over 15 years experience messages, them even a simple hello, they delete profile instantly or never bother writing back.  A few have, but not many.  Usually we get as a couple, oh he's too old, too fat or she is, etc. The lovely ones who are judgemental.

At the same time, if you are nice and respectful to one, they consider it a sign of weakness and the Top does not have the "balls" to train them and be strict. On the other hand there are the ones who rush in without knowing what they are getting into and start chasing the predators and get abused and tortured.

I don't understand it sometimes. Age is only a small factor in the overall picture.  I would think most would jump on the experienced trainers and Tops. Experience should be just as important if not more. 


Have others seen this huge rift on collarme and other adult sites as well?

 
Nope.
And to be frank, there is nothing wrong with being judgemental.  It is how the human race survives.  It has zero to do with respect.  Nothing owed, nothing expected.  Just because people may lack tact, doesn't make them bad persay.  People have preferences, if you don't fit it, better to know and not waste time.  And who classed yourself (which is who I am assuming this post is about) as experienced?
Age and years practising means nothing, whatever your profile might announce.
 
the.dark.


< Message edited by Darcyandthedark -- 4/22/2008 12:39:28 PM >


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RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Question for those w... - 4/22/2008 12:01:50 PM   
OmegaG


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you say of your girl "Aged:19 years old, Has been in the lifestyle since she was 18 months old. "  that would cause me pause.
 
She says you've been with thousands of girls, that would cause me pause.
 
It's been said at least twice that she would be the alpha slut, personally, I'd prefer to see how a dynamic unfolds.
 
And you have 5 cats.
 
That is alot for me, I would think that for someone who is between 18 and 21 it would be quite a lot to handle

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RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Questionf or those w... - 4/22/2008 12:04:14 PM   
SailingBum


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I don't consider the exp level when I'm looking for a girl.  that is so far down the list it's laughable

BadOne

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RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Questionf or those w... - 4/22/2008 12:23:26 PM   
DesFIP


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You're limiting your search to 18-21 y.o.'s yet when you get rejected because you're older than they prefer, they're the ones being judgmental? Pot meet kettle.

If you have the right to not talk to a 22 year old because she's too old for you, then why shouldn't an 18 year old have the right to not talk to you because you're too old for her?

Being cynical to the core, when a man nearly twice a girl's age is seeking very young, zero experience I have to wonder why. And I usually assume they're seeking someone who won't know enough to judge whether what he does is safe or healthy for her. But as I say, I'm a cynic.

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RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Questionf or those w... - 4/22/2008 12:24:07 PM   
lostsoulskitten


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I talk with older ones just fine thanks. 

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RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Question for those w... - 4/22/2008 12:39:16 PM   
antipode


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I would estimate that somewhere between 95 & 98% of all profiles on public sites are either fake, cyber-only, or both, so I can't say I see the validity of your comparison.

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RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Question for those w... - 4/22/2008 12:51:02 PM   
BitaTruble


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quote:

ORIGINAL: lostsoulskitten

I was going to toss this up to the other Masters and Mistresses first, before tossing the same question to the submissives.

We have browsed something over 6,000+ profiles on collarme, on girls 18-21.  There seems to be a interesting rift.

60% want a master/Mistress closer to their age, about 10% want ones of other ethnic background, the other 30 % want ones old enough to be their grandparents.

It seems as soon as I hit the age of 32, I hit some invisible little void that sucked me right in.   Girls beg for ones with experience, but as soon as a true real life Top with over 15 years experience messages, them even a simple hello, they delete profile instantly or never bother writing back.  A few have, but not many.  Usually we get as a couple, oh he's too old, too fat or she is, etc. The lovely ones who are judgemental.

At the same time, if you are nice and respectful to one, they consider it a sign of weakness and the Top does not have the "balls" to train them and be strict. On the other hand there are the ones who rush in without knowing what they are getting into and start chasing the predators and get abused and tortured.

I don't understand it sometimes. Age is only a small factor in the overall picture.  I would think most would jump on the experienced trainers and Tops. Experience should be just as important if not more. 


Have others seen this huge rift on collarme and other adult sites as well?


It's probably not your age. 35 is prime, so look at what other factors might be involved. The hottest commodity on the market is a beta female (especially a very young beta), so they have the luxury of picking and choosing. It's that supply and demand thing going on. You have to present as outstanding and any little thing is going to get you put into the trash heap along with all the rest who are seeking their attention. I'm not saying it's fair, but it's probably very realistic.

Keep looking or, better yet, concentrate on each other and growing in the dynamic you currently have and don't worry so much about finding a third. You two haven't been together all that long yet so there are probably a lot of things which you are still discovering about each other. You've noted in your sig line that you are about to be wed.. that's a major turn off for a lot of betas. You're going to be a newlywed and looking to add someone to the household right off the bat and a beta is probably going to be a bit skittish in thinking they will have a place in such a new life. Get some stability with what you have under your belt first, get a routine into place and then put out what you both desire and what you both offer. Be patient, take your time, be selective in who you contact making sure they meet all your criteria and you meet theirs at the initial stages and perhaps you'll fair better as a result. What you are doing right now is obviously not working, so you need to change your tack. 6000+ women can't all be wrong .. so it's got to be you.

Good luck,

Celeste

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RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Question for those w... - 4/22/2008 2:20:05 PM   
akisha


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quote:

ORIGINAL: antipode

I would estimate that somewhere between 95 & 98% of all profiles on public sites are either fake, cyber-only, or both, so I can't say I see the validity of your comparison.


wow that's harsh. I'd say maybe 40%  - 50% might be fake but come on 98% I don't think so.

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RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Question for those w... - 4/22/2008 2:36:35 PM   
SteelofUtah


Posts: 5307
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From: St George Utah
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Yeah.... Um.... you don't even have a Profile to review. So basically you are just complaining.

Perhaps if we could review your CM Profile we could go..... Oh Yeah now I get it. You come across as Creepy. But without that you are just piss-moaning.

I have been in this lifestyle since I was 16. At 27 now I am FAR from a midlife crisis. However I did want to share that the trend in desire ebbs and flows in odd directions at times. Just wait a year and eventually you will be in style again.

Just think of yourself as Corderoy Pants. Hold onto them long enough and they will be the "IN" thing again. However if you are looking for a SERIOUS relationship well you have to ask youself one very serious question.

What do you really have to offer someone so much younger than you? I mean Mentally and Interest wise what will you have in common?

I was discussing this the other night with a friend about how my wife doesn't remember certain TV shows that at the time DEFINED our childhood and how it makes me feel old when everything that defined her childhood never impacted me the same. My wife is 21 and I am 27. A LOT changed from the beginning of the 80's to the Beginning of the 90's. There are times my wife just doesn't relate.

Think about it.

Steel

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RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Question for those w... - 4/22/2008 2:45:33 PM   
Emperor1956


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I have 10+ years experience (not, by the way, 6 months of experience 20 times over).  And how did I get that experience?  BY NOT BROWSING OVER 6,000+ PROFILES ON COLLARME OF GIRLS 18-21!

TURN OFF THE COMPUTER, GET OUT AND DO SOMETHING.  Sheeeeeesh.

E.

oh...

Well, I see the OP has no profile now, and apparently had a profile earlier that caused comment?  hmmmm I smell TROLL.

ed. to add.  Corduroy pants are not "in"?  Why didn't I get this memo?

< Message edited by Emperor1956 -- 4/22/2008 2:46:31 PM >


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RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Questionf or those w... - 4/22/2008 2:47:01 PM   
colouredin


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Im 21, my ex was 33, before that 35, before that 29 (are we seeing a pattern here?)

If I get a simple hello i delete it, i get so many messages every day I only reply to those from people I know or that make an effort (just saying hello isnt an effort) also if its a couple there has to be something particularly special about them for me to bother because seriously they are hard work.

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RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Question for those w... - 4/22/2008 3:24:05 PM   
kinkypuppy2


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Don't think its a mid-life issue its more a generational one.  You bring up a few different issues in this question. First off as far as seeing it. Yes both myself and my slave has.
Looking at it from the younger viewpoint anyone over 35 is "OLD" or "Your like my FATHER"
Looking at it from the older viewpoint anyone in their 18-21 yr age bracket has no clue about the word commitment as they all seem to want it NOW and know everything.

Then there is the physical issues, I am not as verile as I was in my 20's and even if I could be I would not want to be. and a 18-20 yr old has raging hormones. Would I enjoy controlling that? Yes. But from their viewpoint would they be interested in a "older" couple over 45 probably not.
There would be advantages tho in having a young stud or slut under my thumb. strength, stamina, sexual drive and eagerness to learn. (besides my slave would love to have a good long fuck of a hour ish again .. :-)

I feel that mentors are a great idea and that having a younger person ask to learn from us older ones - I wish I saw that as a possable 30+ yrs ago my life would have been totally different. But did I even know to look?  No.

Also however there is the issue of life experiances. My slave met a nice young man who was more mature then his age and was a very very good Dom. However they had nothing in common, Book authers, music, cooking, camping, life before television much less before cables 100 channels , life before computers, microwave ovens, cell phoness.. etc etc.... So what kind of common things can they even just talk about.. VERY little.

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RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Questionf or those w... - 4/22/2008 3:52:46 PM   
OldBastardly1


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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP


Being cynical to the core, when a man nearly twice a girl's age is seeking very young, zero experience I have to wonder why. And I usually assume they're seeking someone who won't know enough to judge whether what he does is safe or healthy for her. But as I say, I'm a cynic.


I must be cynical as well, because this rings true and loud for me.

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RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Question for those w... - 4/22/2008 4:07:52 PM   
somethndif


Posts: 136
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quote:

ORIGINAL: lostsoulskitten

I was going to toss this up to the other Masters and Mistresses first, before tossing the same question to the submissives.

We have browsed something over 6,000+ profiles on collarme, on girls 18-21.  There seems to be a interesting rift.

*snip*   the other 30 % want ones old enough to be their grandparents.


Since that seems to bother you, just have those 18-21 year old girls contact me!  *wink*
 
Dan

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RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Question for those w... - 4/22/2008 7:35:33 PM   
ResidentSadist


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I think you described the stereotypes very well and I see them everywhere online and in real life.

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RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Question for those w... - 4/22/2008 7:53:14 PM   
Leatherist


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The little girls want Johnny Dep.

Get over it.

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RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Question for those w... - 4/22/2008 8:00:10 PM   
littlebitxxx


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Okay, got the cheese and crackers going.  I really would prefer a good Merlot, though. 

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RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Question for those w... - 4/22/2008 8:00:50 PM   
Lynnxz


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

The little girls want Johnny Dep.

Get over it.


Hells yes I do... AND I want him in the pirate costume!

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RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Question for those w... - 4/22/2008 8:05:40 PM   
mrac


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i keep getting older they stay the same age

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