RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel!

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RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel! - 4/23/2008 4:45:03 PM

batshalom

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~fast reply~

... but ... but ... high protocol is fun.

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RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel! - 4/23/2008 4:49:59 PM

adoracat

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quote:

ORIGINAL: kyraofMists

For the non-OCD subs, how long do you think it would take for all that stuff to fall by the wayside and why isn't protocol and ritual seen as deep, meaningful interactions?

He and Alandra have been together for over 20 years and the protocol and enjoyment in the relationship has only increased. The three of us have been together for three years next week, and our relationship keeps getting better and yet we still follow most of the same protocols and rituals as when I first became his.

It isn't about who is doing what... it is about who is fulfilled in what they are doing. If someone is not fulfilled in following certain protocols and rituals, then I can't see them maintaining it over a long period. If they are, then I can see them maintaining for a long time.

Knight's Kyra

when i think about protocol and ritual in a relationship, i dont see those things as stuffy and meaningless....

i see it as a long, intricate dance between the partners, one movement sliding gracefully into another response, full of hidden meaning that sometimes sparks little smiles in each person, memories of slipups, or how the ritual began...

those are lovely things to me. Daddy and i dont stand on protocols, but there are a few little rituals we engage in...and so also do TheEngineer and i. those are the things that bring deepness and meaning to the relationship, even something as simple as getting up immediately when the clock alarms, to bring the other coffee in bed in the am.

wolf is gonna miss that one...

kitten

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RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel! - 4/23/2008 4:58:49 PM

KnightofMists

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quote:

ORIGINAL: juicy22

What about laughing? What about being spontaneous? What about being natural in your submissiveness and dominance? Why does it seem to be in CM all about strict protocol and formality?

Laughing and being spontaneous can co-exist with protocals and formality.

quote:

<BARF> <BORING> To each his or her own. This is not a judgemental posting.

Besides your comments being rude as the Mod pointed out... your integrity is also reflected with what you said. It is rather questionable to say this is not a judgemental posting... but yet make such rude comments at the same time. Ironically the same people that make these kinds of comments fail to see how it reflects poorly on their integrity.

quote:

I have not read anything on these message boards about FUN!

obviously you haven't spend much time reading the boards then and/or been here very long. But just because you haven't seen it.. doesn't equate to it not being here.

quote:

I have been in 2 loooooooong term D/s relationships. I have never lived this "training" life and all this other bullcrap as I see it.

Good for you... so what bullcrap did you do then? btw... what is long-term?

quote:

Of course we discussed things and give and take. All the analysis and all the ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Have fun...laugh...be natural.....If you are what you are then it will all come. Communicate, play and have fun!

obviously you did it very well...since you had 2 not just 1 Long-term relationship.

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RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel! - 4/23/2008 5:02:35 PM

KnightofMists

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quote:

ORIGINAL: juicy22

Ohhhhhhhh ok...you dont think kittensols' remark wasnt an attack? Scroll. I think it was rude and dismissive!

mmmmmmmm I am not so sure about it being rude... I can agree with it being dismissive.....

Of course... I also think the dismissive tone was higly appropriate and well deserved by you

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RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel! - 4/23/2008 5:04:38 PM

sambamanslilgirl

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training /protocols/rules etc - things which aren't part of my relationship with Daddy. we have a mutual power exchange type of D/s dynamic. may not work for all but it works wonderfully for us.

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RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel! - 4/23/2008 5:08:36 PM

derfrewop

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I actually agree with you a lot more than you seem to think. Sorry about implying it was just OCD subs, of course it can also be OCD Doms. While there are some people who revel in and would be lost without their rituals, for most people most of the time it peters out. After all, to a large extent, rituals are a shorthand way of communicating. Things like "Me Dom: you sub" or "Master I'm ready" or simply "I love you". In any relationship, rituals or candy or flowers which are used to communicate early in the relationship generally go away and are replaced by actions more specifically in tune with the people involved. These usually don't make any sense to outsiders. That is not to say that initial rituals always go away but their continuance is because they have come to possess the deeper meanings for both. The opposite possibility, that the rituals don't develop deeper meanings can only lead to boredom and eventually the "why the hell am I doing this" questions.

Here, I was expecting to be slammed for noting how few posters seem to have actual experience and instead got hit for something really banal and obvious. Go figure

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RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel! - 4/23/2008 5:11:40 PM

SassySarijane

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~hijack~

Hey samba....great new pic!!

~ok...back to the thread~

OP there are some who find joy, fulfillment and yes even fun in rules, rituals and protocols in relationships. It's about what fulfills those in the relationships. It might not be your thing, but then your thing might not be someone else's either.

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RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel! - 4/23/2008 5:16:27 PM

KnightofMists

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quote:

ORIGINAL: derfrewop

their continuance is because they have come to possess the deeper meanings for both.

I agree that sometimes rituals/protocals "can come" to possess deeper meaning.

However,

Sometimes... they have a deep meaning right from the beginning and always do.

Sometimes... they have a deeper meaning right from the beginning and overtime.. they become less important.

Trying to establish a specific or universal reason why they are maintained or fade away is rather a Fools errand. I think it is much more important to consider the individuals in all it's subject prespectives to consider the why's of this and that.

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RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel! - 4/23/2008 5:22:59 PM

WhiteFox77

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Wow, and I thought this was going to be a light-hearted topic...

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RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel! - 4/23/2008 5:49:49 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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Definitely sounds like someone has taken a slice of view and made it into the whole.

Lighten up yourself! Trust me, hang around and get to know the regulars and you'll see just how seriously we take ourselves and our relationships :)

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RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel! - 4/23/2008 6:06:36 PM

KatyLied

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Sounds to me like someone is protesting too much and would enjoy experiencing some un-fun protocols.

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RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel! - 4/23/2008 6:14:07 PM

MadRabbit

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quote:

ORIGINAL: juicy22

What about laughing? What about being spontaneous? What about being natural in your submissiveness and dominance? Why does it seem to be in CM all about strict protocol and formality? <BARF> <BORING> To each his or her own. This is not a judgemental posting. I have not read anything on these message boards about FUN! I have been in 2 loooooooong term D/s relationships. I have never lived this "training" life and all this other bullcrap as I see it. Of course we discussed things and give and take. All the analysis and all the ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Have fun...laugh...be natural.....If you are what you are then it will all come. Communicate, play and have fun!

It's pretty naive to think you can collect enough information about the daily lives of individuals who post here to make any kind of accurate guess as to what they are like in those daily lives.

Its a forum for theoretical discussion, not a blog page to talk about how Master Jimmy slipped on a banana on his way to spank his slave and how they both had a good laugh over it.

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RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel! - 4/23/2008 6:31:34 PM

akisha

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quote:

ORIGINAL: juicy22

What about laughing? What about being spontaneous? What about being natural in your submissiveness and dominance? Why does it seem to be in CM all about strict protocol and formality? <BARF> <BORING> To each his or her own. This is not a judgemental posting. I have not read anything on these message boards about FUN! I have been in 2 loooooooong term D/s relationships. I have never lived this "training" life and all this other bullcrap as I see it. Of course we discussed things and give and take. All the analysis and all the ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Have fun...laugh...be natural.....If you are what you are then it will all come. Communicate, play and have fun!

Lots of relationships are fun. But most of those ppl don't need to post questions on here asking how to have fun with their partners or with in their relationships. So ofcourse you are going to see more posts about rules and protocols. That is because it's something people think they need to learn.

All my relationships have been filled with fun and laughter and kidding around. If they weren't I wouldn't stick around long.

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RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel! - 4/23/2008 6:44:04 PM

MagiksSlave

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good dog!

Squee!!

MS

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RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel! - 4/23/2008 8:21:52 PM

DefiantFlower

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Ohh! Bitchslap from Mod XI!!!

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RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel! - 4/23/2008 8:57:09 PM

ResidentSadist

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If you like protocol, then you like it. If you like whining, you whine.

To each their own unless you're Moderator 11 who is everywhere at once... like an all seeing eye that knows eveything you do and enforces the forum's "protocol" on everyone.

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RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel! - 4/23/2008 9:07:21 PM

sunshinemiss

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wait... this is sposed to be fun? doggone it, i knew i was doing something wrong... there's 2 whole sections... humor and polls and other random stupidity... we are so much fun on this forum that we got 2 whole wings of the house!!!

and what everybody else said, too!

peace,
sunshine

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RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel! - 4/23/2008 9:42:38 PM

Poetryinpain

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OP, you've been reading only some of the threads. There are lots of threads that are lighthearted in nature and get hijacked and dragged back on topic and jokes told and stuff, and nobody complains because we're all having fun.

Very few people can live in a certain way without developing some sort of sense of humor about it. And the best place to share that humor is with others who either share the life or understand it. Disabled people can joke about their disabilities, people of certain ethnicities can make jokes about the stereotypes of their ethnicity. BDSM people can joke about the various aspects of the dynamics.

Maybe you're reading only the threads where someone is asking a serious question. I'm impressed with the helpfulness of the members of this forum, BTW. But you gotta branch out and find the silly strings - er - threads.

pip, sometimes a little silly

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RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel! - 4/23/2008 10:37:00 PM

Leatherist

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If i wanted to live in the victorian age,I would just convert to Mormonisn and move to salt lake city.

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RE: Stand Up!..Sit Down...Kneel! - 4/23/2008 10:44:16 PM

aphrodite5

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Lets have a test to see how fast the s-types can follow commands! Stand, sit, kneel, stand, kneel, stand, sit, kneel....

Man, I would so fall on my rear. And laugh about it. Clumsy girl.

We have protocol AND fun. Rules and jokes. We like a little balance, so thinks don't just run amok.

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