RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move?

RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (Full Version)

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christine1 -> RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (4/27/2008 11:51:56 AM)
most who put me on their admirers list don't contact me and for the most part i don't initiate anything, i've never put anyone on mine...mine is empty. i've contacted 2 doms so far on CM so far and i don't see myself contacting more in the near future. hell, i'm still trying to figure out what i want and if i'm ready for what i want...shrugs, such is the life of, well me...[8\|]

DesFIP -> RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (4/27/2008 1:28:10 PM)
I've been on some people's lists not because they want a relationship with me, but because they liked reading my posts. I've put people on a list because they uploaded funny pics frequently. It doesn't mean anything more than they want to be able to keep track of you, for whatever reason. Now if you're curious, write and ask why. Otherwise, enjoy your popularity!

RavenMuse -> RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (4/27/2008 1:38:42 PM)
If I am reading through a few profiles I may well pop someone on favorates as a way of bookmarking them to re-read later, I may decide to drop them a memo or I may not... those I do not I'll remove from the list once I have made that decision. Same if I am going to memo them but don't have the time right there and then. Best to wait rather than send off something rushed given I don't tend to do the usual CM 'standard' one line wonder type mails.

timsubspirit -> RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (4/27/2008 2:24:03 PM)
try again.?.?. Greetings DesFIP, tim here. i can't tell You how much i enjoy Your posts. i presently an un-collard "brother" submissive and still seeking a Domme'. However, imho, a person is a fool if they let a chance for a friendship pass them by... Thats why i'm here... i enjoy the lifestyle, have a wacky sense of humor, and the Dommes' i play with regularly tell me i'm a bit of a S.A.M. & a pain slut...not to mention a, "cross climber".... i have some pics of a photo-shoot about a month ago... they ARE scenes pictures, ( i'm the subbie) <naturaly> at; www.thecontinuumchicago.com click on subs if You wish. i'll keep an eye on Your posts, Thank You. You must be pretty cool... Sincerely, tim (timsubspirit at Aol & Yahoo)

TreasureKY -> RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (4/27/2008 2:47:22 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: timsubspirit try again.?.?. Greetings DesFIP, tim here. i can't tell You how much i enjoy Your posts. i presently an un-collard "brother" submissive and still seeking a Domme'. However, imho, a person is a fool if they let a chance for a friendship pass them by... Thats why i'm here... i enjoy the lifestyle, have a wacky sense of humor, and the Dommes' i play with regularly tell me i'm a bit of a S.A.M. & a pain slut...not to mention a, "cross climber".... i have some pics of a photo-shoot about a month ago... they ARE scenes pictures, ( i'm the subbie) <naturaly> at; www.thecontinuumchicago.com click on subs if You wish. i'll keep an eye on Your posts, Thank You. You must be pretty cool... Sincerely, tim (timsubspirit at Aol & Yahoo) Wow, tim... I hate to sound judgemental and rude, but that's kinda creepy. Aside from your comments sounding like a personal introductory message (and having nothing to do with the original topic of this thread), why on earth would you think Celeste would be the least bit interested in seeing pictures of you scening?

s0ngbird -> RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (4/27/2008 2:48:15 PM)
[sm=seesaw.gif][sm=passthelube.gif][image]http://www.collarchat.com/upfiles/smiley/whap.gif[/image][sm=seesaw.gif] Thank you so much, everyone, for sharing your ideas and thoughts. I was sure looking at this in shades of black and white. It is really great to be able to see all the gray area in between...it assists in finding a certain level of acceptance, being reminded that people approach things so differently. Now why would they DO that???? My way is clearly the RIGHT way!! LMAO

domiguy -> RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (4/27/2008 2:50:40 PM)
I have never put anyone on my admirers list and I have no fucking friends....I am a lone wolf...A drifter...I'd rather kill ya then talk to you. Chicks really gobble this kind of shit up...As well as my Domidrippings.

GreedyTop -> RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (4/27/2008 2:57:06 PM)
I sevcretly sdfmird yiu, domi.. gotta sstdop tyuoing onehagndeg

mzbehavin -> RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (4/27/2008 3:01:32 PM)
I've gotten requests for 'friends' who never write or talk on boards, but i don't know them personally so shrugs whats the point?... Yes i look at the admirers list. If i asked someone to be a friend it would be with the desire for further communication. So far i've not invited anyone to my friends list or been an admirer officially of another. Ha, that in itself says something~ Unofficially there are people i admire on the boards but i don't feel the need to tag them and follow what they post. IF i did, i would email them personally. Thats just me though.... everyones got their own perceptions.

Aileen1968 -> RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (4/27/2008 3:04:36 PM)
quote: try again.?.?. Greetings DesFIP, tim here. i can't tell You how much i enjoy Your posts. i presently an un-collard "brother" submissive and still seeking a Domme'. However, imho, a person is a fool if they let a chance for a friendship pass them by... Thats why i'm here... i enjoy the lifestyle, have a wacky sense of humor, and the Dommes' i play with regularly tell me i'm a bit of a S.A.M. & a pain slut...not to mention a, "cross climber".... i have some pics of a photo-shoot about a month ago... they ARE scenes pictures, ( i'm the subbie) <naturaly> at; www.thecontinuumchicago.com click on subs if You wish. i'll keep an eye on Your posts, Thank You. You must be pretty cool... Sincerely, tim (timsubspirit at Aol & Yahoo) Oooh. you have a stalker. Make him gobble up domidrippings and post those pics.

hardbodysub -> RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (4/27/2008 3:16:30 PM)
Adding a profile to the favorites list is merely bookmarking it, for whatever reason. You might like something they wrote in a forum, something in their profile, a photo, even something about their lifestyle situation or attitude that makes you want to check back later. You might dislike something, and want to refer to it later. You might find them fascinating, and want to contact them, but don't have time right now. In other words, it doesn't mean jack. I'm sure that sometimes people use the list to indicate an interest, but they're too lazy, too busy, or just too nervous to actually send a message, or they might just want to see what you'll do. But the simple fact that someone shows up in your admirers list doesn't mean anything in particular. Understanding this, I'm very amused by people who rant about being added to someone else's favorites list as if someone made an unwelcome pass at them (I'm not referring to s0ngbird, who posted a perfectly reasonable question).

Mercnbeth -> RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (4/27/2008 4:13:04 PM)
~ Fast Reply ~ Admirers, friends, stalkers, whatever; we "approve" anyone who requests. It is a bit odd to get notified that someone 'admired' you without ever hearing from them before; but so what? It's the internet - if they get some enjoyment out of it good for them. As far as 'first contact'; we've made it in some cases and others have approached us first. Once we end up meeting, I don't think 'who made the first move' ever comes up. It is the same with email messages. We've responded to every one. It takes very little time to respond with an appreciative; "No thanks! - Good Luck!". Sometimes, when I'm feeling 'evil' I may ask about the reading abilities of some wanting beth to be their Dominatrix; but even that isn't a bother and falls into the 'fun' category. Maybe when Mr. Gates is able to create an internet where the person's hand comes out to grab you I'll be more concerned and selective. For now - its relatively harmless fun. You can never have enough FUN!

Prinsexx -> RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (4/27/2008 4:31:43 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: s0ngbird It has been my experience, under this pseudonym as well as others, that some Doms simply tag someone as a favorite, sit back, and wait to see if li'l fishie takes the bait. I find it fascinating that many would supposedly like a profile enough to be on an "admirers" list, yet never even send a "Howdy!" Anyone else have thoughts, concerns, grins to share on this? S I've only just checked my admirers list....wow maybe I should do this when I have a down day .....many of my admirers have neither responded to me on the forums or sent me mail. I also have sunscribers to my journal who have not mailed me. I do sometimes send a 'you are viewing me' to those whom I think might respond with interesting reason as to why.......... but mostly I use collarme mail to write to those who have spoekn on the forums and with whom I feel i have something private to say. i also get really incredible mail. Some of my best support comes from those who have read spmething i have said on a forum and have written privately to support me or to clarify when they feel they have responded in an ambivalent way. I also write email to those whom I have quipped at sometimes and feel later I should have had more integrity. I do ask those whom I would like to meet in reality to be my friends...you know the ones who are distanced by geographical constraints but i would like to haang around with.

wwwkevinww -> RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (4/27/2008 4:42:18 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Phin cuz if they dont say anything to me how interested can they be? Even in a sub I respect initive and foward thinking. You can ignore winks and what not if you want. We all have free choice after all. Who is to say who starts and who ends relationships...A guy can think he started it, or a woman, but maybe if the body language from the other party wasn't correct, etc, it wouldn't of started to begin with. It takes two to tango, and is it too much to type Hi! to someone if you really are interested in conversing? I remember my last GF, who I went to go see and she refused to share in the expenses of me going to visit her etc, even though she enjoyed the use of the hotel room, etc. I basically didn't want to be with her if she wasn't willing to share expenses, although she probably thinks it was because I just stopped being interested, etc....

christine1 -> RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (4/27/2008 4:46:29 PM)
huh, color me confused as hell....

OldBastardly1 -> RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (4/27/2008 5:03:15 PM)
I sometimes add people to my favorites list to make it easier to follow up later. It is not a "I want to fuck this person" list. I have a guy that has subscribed to my journal...but I have NEVER written anything in my journal. I don't think he wants me, he is just a bit odd. On another site, where you can send a wink, I will send a wink to somebody that catches my attention. My intention is that I would like to learn more about them IF they share my interest. If they are also curious, they wink back and then we can start a dialogue.

ReynardM -> RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (4/27/2008 5:10:52 PM)
I view the "favorites" list as a place to store the names of users who interest me. Adding someone to my favorites doesn't mean I necessarily intend to message them, it just means I think they're worth keeping an eye on. Personally I don't see the "adding to favorites" thing as a communication device. If I want to talk to someone I'll message them. If I add them to favorites and they see that and message me, great. But I never add someone to favorites in the desperate hope that they'll message me first. My favorites list is for MY reference, not a way to communicate with other users.

s0ngbird -> RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (4/27/2008 5:13:49 PM)
All right, I realize I am hijacking my own thread here :), but just had to respond to this post. Personally, if I am out with a Dom, I had gotten the impression that, yes, he would generally pay. I believe, even in this day and age, a woman wants to be taken care of, cherished, etc. Part of that is the guy paying for the date. Don't get me wrong...there are exceptions, and I have paid my way lots of times, when it was appropriate. But maybe your girl was just trying to get you to do what she thought was the "right" thing.

Evility -> RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (4/27/2008 5:14:37 PM)
If they have not sent you an email how can you be so sure what their motives are? There are female submissives on CM that I do admire for one reason or another and still would not be interested in.

Real_Trouble -> RE: Admirers...Waiting for the sub to make the first move? (4/27/2008 5:23:29 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: s0ngbird It has been my experience, under this pseudonym as well as others, that some Doms simply tag someone as a favorite, sit back, and wait to see if li'l fishie takes the bait. I find it fascinating that many would supposedly like a profile enough to be on an "admirers" list, yet never even send a "Howdy!" Anyone else have thoughts, concerns, grins to share on this? S In general, I throw someone on my favorites list to either keep track of posts or to look closer at them later. Often they come off again without a word. I think you are reading too much into this.

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