Respect and ? (Full Version)

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SurDub -> Respect and ? (4/28/2008 12:53:16 PM)

I find it very interesting that with so many profiles on CM, that many are what I term nothing more than rude. If I send an email, sometimes it is first just to break the ice a bit.  In some cases they can a bit more lengthy.  I would say the better percentage, there is no response, none.  Know I understand that not everyone is for eveyone, we are all unique in the way.  But if you are going to take time to place a profile and someone takes time to responds, are those that don't just so busy that can't. Perhaps the should remove their profile.  Oh, BTW, I am on talking about responding to a rude, crude email.  I to will not bother with them..

Inquiring minds want to know...what do others think.

SurDub




KatyLied -> RE: Respect and ? (4/28/2008 12:54:41 PM)

no response = no interest




SNoB -> RE: Respect and ? (4/28/2008 12:56:44 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

no response = no interest



Pretty much.




tinkerbelle3 -> RE: Respect and ? (4/28/2008 1:00:52 PM)

First of all I think that this question has been asked to death in so many different ways, I can't believe I'm responding to it but here goes.

I intentionally have little to no information about me except that I am part of a couple not looking for anything else. I intentionally do not post responses or questions that will bring unwanted attention to me, I mark my age as a senior citizen. And, yet I continue to get emails from people. That doesn't really answer your question but it felt better saying it.

Now, to get to your question, back in the day when I was looking for someone I made a point to reply to emails from ALL men who were not rude. I would say something like, I appreciate the time you took to read my profile and write to me. However, I don't think that we'd be a good match, good luck to you.

You'd think that would be enough huh? Well, that what happens are a large percentage write back saying "how do you know we wouldn't be a good match?" "who do you think you are?" etc etc. I found that it was much easier just to ignore them and not respond.

I would advise just not to take it personally and move on. -tinkerbelle3









GreedyTop -> RE: Respect and ? (4/28/2008 1:02:42 PM)

here we go again..*sigh*

No response, no interest.
no response, they havent had time to respond.
no response, they havent read it yet.




Sirsinini -> RE: Respect and ? (4/28/2008 1:03:35 PM)


no response = no interest


Unfortunately that is the eye-opening agenda of most folk on CM. 
Even after you read ONLY SEEKING FRIENDS......FRIENDS ALWAYS WELCOME..... 
 
and in that no response because someone is too disrespectful or truly not interested becasue THEY ARE TOO INTO THEMSELVES to even be interested in something or someone else....  even if  in some vague way....
 
This in itself tells me ALOT about people... 




KatyLied -> RE: Respect and ? (4/28/2008 1:10:02 PM)

quote:

No response, no interest.


yep.  And we don't even want to get started with what can happen when you do respond "thanks, but I'm not interested".  That can let loose a ton of begging pm's from a dominant, that's a lot of fun to watch, uber dom crying like a spoiled little boy.




DesFIP -> RE: Respect and ? (4/28/2008 1:11:26 PM)

You are paying for other people's rudeness. I would estimate that ten to twenty percent of those whom I turned down, sent back unpleasant emails. I include in those the whining ones, but I can so be compatible with you, I can do anything you want. As well as the plain rude ones, well you're too fat to fuck anyway. And then the small percentage wishing that I would meet someone who would cut me up.

The truth is that even one of the latter two kinds could turn me off of reading mail for a week. But I almost never get unpleasant emails if I don't respond.

Accept it, no response is a response. And after all what's the difference between no response and one of thanks but no thanks? You've been turned down either way.

Now, one thing that you need to consider is that anyone who has read this thread is likely to now be putting you in their mental category of whiner and if they connect your sn with an email they get later today or tomorrow, you won't get a response even if you're otherwise perfect. I suggest lying low for a couple of days before sending emails out. And when you do, type a letter geared towards her profile into word, use spell and grammar check and then copy and paste it. Neatness counts.

Typo 




colouredin -> RE: Respect and ? (4/28/2008 1:12:49 PM)

I cant be arsed to talk to people i dont want to talk to, no matter what my profile says, I used to reply to all messages now i dont even friends wise whats the point if i know i think they are a tosser? just my opinion




GreedyTop -> RE: Respect and ? (4/28/2008 1:14:28 PM)

*tacklesmooches the colourful one*




colouredin -> RE: Respect and ? (4/28/2008 1:17:02 PM)

awww fankyou beautiful i needed that [:D][:D][:D][:D]




Madame4a -> RE: Respect and ? (4/28/2008 1:18:53 PM)

I used to try to respond politely to all email, even if it was "thanks but no thanks" .. and sometimes, if the reason was obvious, I included it.  But in the end, there is either too much of the email from people who clearly don't read my profile and are obviously incompatible; or when I do respond politely, I get a series of continued insistent emails.  After the third, I block them.

I do not think I have to respond to everyone that writes me.  And neither do you.

and I'm adding... I hear that women get a whole lot more mail then men to around here.. and so you'll like find that women are less likely to respond just due to volume...




MistressKali1 -> RE: Respect and ? (4/28/2008 1:19:21 PM)

I get dozens of messages a day and even more on weekends. 95% are obviously not well suited for what I am looking for. I don't respond to those that are of no interest since that just encourages further correspondence, which I don't have time for.  I prefer to focus My attention and time on those who are actually interesting to Me. I don't think its rude, its realistic!




SurDub -> RE: Respect and ? (4/28/2008 1:19:54 PM)

if a DOM begs, perhaps he needs to look at himself in the mirror.  Begging does not become a DOM.




DesFIP -> RE: Respect and ? (4/28/2008 1:20:44 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sirsinini


Unfortunately that is the eye-opening agenda of most folk on CM. 
Even after you read ONLY SEEKING FRIENDS......FRIENDS ALWAYS WELCOME..... 
 
and in that no response because someone is too disrespectful or truly not interested becasue THEY ARE TOO INTO THEMSELVES to even be interested in something or someone else....  even if  in some vague way....
 


Is that your experience? My experience is that when a single male in my area and vaguely my age range contacts me, it isn't for friendship. The first email may not be sexual but those thereafter are attempts for me to cyber, cam or meet him. It isn't that I'm too into myself, it's that I'm cynical,

If you sent me an email I would respond. If your Sir did, I would check first to see if the profile said looking for a third. If so, I wouldn't.

The truth is that I've never had even a casual friendship with a single male who wasn't a forumite when he started the emailing that didn't quickly turn into an attempt to get me away from The Man.




DupedDom -> RE: Respect and ? (4/28/2008 1:22:28 PM)

Well, you have to make sure that the person goes on collarme, with some regularity (check when the last time they were on collarme), then I check my "sent" mail to see if they have read my mail or not. So if I send an email, they read it, do not respond, I do a follow up about a week later. If still no reply, I won't contact them again. Sometimes the problem is that their are a limited amount of people on here and when you see the same faces over and over, when you search, you tend to repeat mail these folks. But this way, I follow up, without being invasive or rude,

I do agree that many replies, no matter how positive, if they include some type of rejection, will get back some negative emails.




KatyLied -> RE: Respect and ? (4/28/2008 1:23:29 PM)

quote:

that didn't quickly turn into an attempt to get me away from The Man.


I think that the thought process for those dominants goes like this:  "someone took a chance on her, she must be worth having."





SurDub -> RE: Respect and ? (4/28/2008 1:24:48 PM)

I was far from whinning...merely making an obeservation.  One of the issues in the BDMS lifestyle for me, has always been respect.  Even a slave deserves respect.  Alas though as with life...rudeness in our society seems to be quite rampant.....  

I know this issue has been discussed over and over...it is interesting off and on to hear new views.

Best to all in their search..

SurDub




KatyLied -> RE: Respect and ? (4/28/2008 1:26:29 PM)

Well anyone can call himself a dom/master, doesn't mean there's going to be an automatic knee bend on the other side.




colouredin -> RE: Respect and ? (4/28/2008 1:26:52 PM)

 
quote:

ORIGINAL: SurDub
Even a slave deserves respect


Fuck me and here I was thinking they were sub-human




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