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midnightwench -> Cathartic BDSM (4/29/2008 2:16:48 PM)

I am curious if anyone out there has stories that they can share about cathartic BDSM. The process sounds like it is what I have been looking for from my Doms for a long time, and have never been able to put into proper terms for them.

Also interested in anyone who has been combining paganism and BDSM in a ritualistic fasion. (read a wonderful book regarding this topic, and would love to hear from those who practice it)

Thank you all for any feedback :)




midnightwench -> RE: Cathartic BDSM (4/29/2008 2:44:29 PM)

hmm lots of people looking, but no one posting :S

I don't mind if there are others out there who are interested in it but don't know anything about posting too... Just looking to discuss




kiwisub12 -> RE: Cathartic BDSM (4/29/2008 2:47:49 PM)

most of my cathartic experiences were unorchestrated, and unexpected.    I don't think you can set up a cathartic experience - it either happens or it doesn't.
For me it was a very visceral experience - and scared the shit out of my Sir. He had no idea what was going on.




DragonLady5 -> RE: Cathartic BDSM (4/29/2008 2:48:56 PM)

What is cathartic BDSM?




midnightwench -> RE: Cathartic BDSM (4/29/2008 2:54:49 PM)

Thank you for responding! (was getting a little worried there). I have had scenes that this has occured slightly..I say slightly because the level of pain it took to get me to this point scared the Sir's I was with and they usually stopped before that.

I have used scening in the past to help work through mood swings (I have cyclothymic d/o) and have found it to work wonders for me. In the book that I read (for anyone who is interested it is on the journal part of my profile) it talks about working through past trauma with a Dom/Domme through a scene, IE a person who is afraid of needles working through that fear in a scene. As usual I am really poor at describing what I mean...but the idea of pushing a boundry so far that you come out fighting on the other side, but free of the "baggage" that holds you down sounds delightful.

I also am facinated with the aspect of combining "official" spirituality with BDSM. I have said for years that pain was spiritual for me, but for some reason my thick skull never thought of combining my religious beliefs with my BDSM.




midnightwench -> RE: Cathartic BDSM (4/29/2008 2:57:01 PM)

Catharsis  - "purification" or "cleansing"

Otherwords using BDSM to work through issues in your life, spirituality conflicts, or other problems that need "fixin'" [:D]




adrian28 -> RE: Cathartic BDSM (4/29/2008 3:02:00 PM)

This is very interesting. My own sub has past traumas that sometimes inhibit our play and I've trying to help her work past it but getting nowhere.




mmsprecious -> RE: Cathartic BDSM (4/29/2008 3:05:09 PM)

i have had this happen both as planned events and as a natural turn of things. i am pagan and use spirituality throughout all of my life. Master and i have done "ordeal work" to break through certain barriers of mine, cleanse things from my past and other spiritual work.
MMs precious




midnightwench -> RE: Cathartic BDSM (4/29/2008 3:06:22 PM)

I feel that this would work wonders for me, to be honest. If done right the Dom/Domme can help empower the submissive to work through that issue, offering guidance and support through the process. It looks as though it could be quite rough, so the aftercare would have to be sparkling. I find the idea scary and terrific at the same time..:S hence why I was seeing if there was anyone who had purposly set up and / or has lived through this process.




midnightwench -> RE: Cathartic BDSM (4/29/2008 3:08:32 PM)

oh wonderful!!! Thank you for speaking up [:D]

May I ask your feelings on it? Something is calling to me on it, but I like to go in with at least some knowledge of what I am getting myself into.




gypsygrl -> RE: Cathartic BDSM (4/29/2008 3:15:32 PM)

quote:

hmm lots of people looking, but no one posting


Yeah.  Its one of those things, along with a spiritual approach to this stuff, that I want to explore, but am totally out of my league when talking about it.  I'm not even sure if I'm thinking about catharsis in the right way, like, am I understanding the word correctly.

Its like, I had a vision once a couple years ago during a really long and intense SM scene right at the end before I completely collaspsed into sobbing tears.  I was a relative newbie and had no idea that could happen but the vision solidified for me something I had been struggling with on only a partly conscious level.  The vision was like, a perfect image of my inner conflict and afterwards, I felt totally relieved of some burden I hadn't, until then, really acknowledged carrying.

Technically, it was a perfect scene but wasn't something I was willing to do again because, well, it scared me that I had taken such a heavy beating.  I was fine the next day even though I was heavily marked (lots of bruises and cuts) but I was still kind of shocked by my own masochism.  Since then, I've never been quite able to play at that level of intensity 'cause I haven't been able to work through the fear.




midnightwench -> RE: Cathartic BDSM (4/29/2008 3:23:56 PM)

quote:


Its like, I had a vision once a couple years ago during a really long and intense SM scene right at the end before I completely collaspsed into sobbing tears.  I was a relative newbie and had no idea that could happen but the vision solidified for me something I had been struggling with on only a partly conscious level.  The vision was like, a perfect image of my inner conflict and afterwards, I felt totally relieved of some burden I hadn't, until then, really acknowledged carrying.


That definatly sounds like what I am talking about :)

I am scared at the same time I really feel I need to do this. Some deeper calling I suppose.  I'm hoping I can find someone who is experianced around my area that can lead me through this process, to hopefully minimize any trauma that I might feel, if any.




HerLord -> RE: Cathartic BDSM (4/29/2008 3:37:35 PM)

This sounds like it's not some thing you can really get from a generalized message board. I am thinking you may to focus this search within the context of your partners. I also believe that it is healthy and beneficial that you are aware of the need for "healing" yourself. I would suggest taking some time to sit in front of your monitor and just "write" a scene that might "cathartisize"(is that even a word?) what you are wanting to work through. Just the writing of it should help you in a smaller way of finding the particular details of what you want healed. In this type of experience I think the details are what is most important.

On the flip side of the copper, I would also suggest that you may be trying to put to much expectation on a, or several, scene. There has never been a magic wand that heals all. (although I have heard of some "Magic Floggers" LOL) But seriously, I would not put all your efforts in one basket. This BDSM thing... It's just NOT the answer to solve all woes. It is really not a whole lot more than a REALLY fun time. To expect more than this might just wind up being disappointing.

And then there's the "other". I also recomend that this process really start with you just looking inward. But some of these things require more than one can do for themselves, so It may behoove you to look for a partner (either strictly for scening or maybe more for life) that you convey OPENLY what you are doing and why, and especially what you hope to get out of it. It may be beneficial to take this story I suggested writing to them and sharing it with them for the avail of your own liberation from your past.

As for the "spiritual" mixing of the two for "ritualistic" scening... I believe your grasping at straws. But then... I may not be the one to seek sprirtual advice from... (you know being the antichrist and all... lol) You may try a google search for ritialistic bdsm.

Any way good luck in your attemps at setting yourself back to "normal", whatever the hell that is for you. But my advice... It really is simple.

Live everday as though it were your last, One day you will be right.

In short this means to me, that you only have today to live. Tommorow is a whole nother day. Remember the past live in today and look to tommorow. If it's fun, do it again.




ResidentSadist -> RE: Cathartic BDSM (4/29/2008 3:37:51 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: midnightwench
I am curious if anyone out there has stories that they can share about cathartic BDSM. The process sounds like it is what I have been looking for from my Doms for a long time, and have never been able to put into proper terms for them.


I put something like that in words from a topside perspective if it helps you any.

I like it when they cry...
Have you ever seen a slave love her Master so deeply that she crys from the emotional release after a good beating?  Have you ever seen a slave feel so passionate that she crosses the pleasure/pain threshold and cums so intensely that it makes her weep?  Have you ever seen trust so deep and complete that tears flow when she follows Master faithfully and overcomes her fears? 

I thrive on the connection, the bonds between a Master and slave and between a sadist and masochist.  I love seeing the look on my slave's face when I see that I control her and what she is feeling.  I like to cross Masterism with sadism while I explore emotional fears, expand physical limits, break mental boundaries and fulfill forbidden desires.  I passionately mix love, torture, sex, fear, pleasure, pain, anguish, lust, trust and I test faith.  I want to see tears of joy, tears of pain, tears of love, tears of pleasure and tears from fear...  I like it when they cry.   




Constrictor1 -> RE: Cathartic BDSM (4/29/2008 3:42:22 PM)

ResidentSadist, Bravo and well said. To me that is just high octane quality BDSM.

Constrictor1




ResidentSadist -> RE: Cathartic BDSM (4/29/2008 3:44:54 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Constrictor1
ResidentSadist, Bravo and well said. To me that is just high octane quality BDSM.
Constrictor1

Thanks... glad to see others that think high octane and tears blend well.




HerLord -> RE: Cathartic BDSM (4/29/2008 3:49:34 PM)

RS. Your a dick. But that's what I love about you!

BTW... That was beautiful.




midnightwench -> RE: Cathartic BDSM (4/29/2008 3:52:58 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: HerLord


On the flip side of the copper, I would also suggest that you may be trying to put to much expectation on a, or several, scene. There has never been a magic wand that heals all. (although I have heard of some "Magic Floggers" LOL) But seriously, I would not put all your efforts in one basket. This BDSM thing... It's just NOT the answer to solve all woes. It is really not a whole lot more than a REALLY fun time. To expect more than this might just wind up being disappointing.



LOL.. thank you for your answer. Where can I sign up for those magic floggers?  I know that there is no magic wand to heal all, trust me on that.. I do like your idea on the writing, and I definatly will try that.

BDSM to me is more than a really fun time, and always has been. Yes don't get me wrong.. I love a good flogging in public just like the next gal (hmm well maybe leaving out that public part for some), but there has always been more for me. The pain that is experianced through the flogging leads me to a calm place inside my head, where there is a strange level of focus that isn't attainable through any other means that I have tried. There is no past or future, only that one moment. I have used this for mood modification quite often, to the point that I no longer needed medications to help me out. To be able to obtain that level of focus combined with a spiritual experiance would be terrific. There are many books out there talking about the combination of spirituality and BDSM, and they all are terrific reads, but alas it is a topic that people are often too afraid to talk about in fear that they will get "dumped" upon for their beliefs, and is indeed a very personal thing for people. To which I thank everyone that shares their experiances with me, because of this.

As far as getting back to "normal" - why in the heck would I want to do that? Life is much more fun being twisted :P

Thanks again for your reply :)




midnightwench -> RE: Cathartic BDSM (4/29/2008 3:54:52 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

I like it when they cry...
Have you ever seen a slave love her Master so deeply that she crys from the emotional release after a good beating?  Have you ever seen a slave feel so passionate that she crosses the pleasure/pain threshold and cums so intensely that it makes her weep?  Have you ever seen trust so deep and complete that tears flow when she follows Master faithfully and overcomes her fears? 

I thrive on the connection, the bonds between a Master and slave and between a sadist and masochist.  I love seeing the look on my slave's face when I see that I control her and what she is feeling.  I like to cross Masterism with sadism while I explore emotional fears, expand physical limits, break mental boundaries and fulfill forbidden desires.  I passionately mix love, torture, sex, fear, pleasure, pain, anguish, lust, trust and I test faith.  I want to see tears of joy, tears of pain, tears of love, tears of pleasure and tears from fear...  I like it when they cry.   



Very beautiful. :)

Thank you for that point of view. I think I shall keep that one on file if you don't mind :)




HerLord -> RE: Cathartic BDSM (4/29/2008 4:02:40 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: midnightwench

As far as getting back to "normal" - why in the heck would I want to do that? Life is much more fun being twisted :P

Thanks again for your reply :)

At least I like your outlook... If it was fun do it again and again and again...




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