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RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/12/2008 9:12:25 PM

Vigilantejustice

Posts: 106
Joined: 11/15/2004
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Well, I've found that verbally, instead of Yellow, when we're alone (in public it seems to be interpreted as Topping from the Bottom) I use:
Easy (like you would with a spooked horse, lol)
Lighter
Slow

Easy is sort of a "okay, you're getting a little too in your groove for me to handle right now," much like BoiJen's "SDS." It can also mean "Ow, my cervix!" Lighter is pretty self explanatory, as is Slow.

When gagged, I've been known to use a squeaky toy in one hand, and clicker (used for dog training) in the other. Squeak is Yellow, Click is Red. Can you tell I worked with animals? lol

I hope you can keep progressing like you want to, and I hope I could help. Good luck!
-Corinne

_____________________________

“Love begets love. This torment is my joy.”
"Those who are willing to be vulnerable move among mysteries."
"[Your work] is carved out of agony as a statue is carved out of marble." -All by Theodore Roethke

(in reply to switchtosub)

Post #: 21

RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/12/2008 9:25:16 PM

UncleNasty

Posts: 1108
Joined: 3/20/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LilMissHaven

I've always prefered the stop light method mentioned above.

Ubiquitous. So, what she said.

Uncle Nasty

(in reply to LilMissHaven)

Post #: 22

RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/12/2008 9:28:28 PM

BBWnNC72

Posts: 1155
Joined: 6/22/2007
From: NC since Jan of 2007, but born and raised in Cali
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my Dominant and i discussed safe words, we chose the stop light method also. Though i have never had to use them, He can tell when to tone it down or when i have had enough of a certain play. Mostly He stoppeds before i think i have had enough.

_____________________________

huggs and purrs
Brian's kat
a.k.a. "greedy monkey"
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
i am who i am, i am not ashamed. spank me, beat me, bite me, pull my hair, dominate me, control me, but always respect me for who i am.

(in reply to switchtosub)

Post #: 23

RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/12/2008 10:14:53 PM

ownedgirlie

Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
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I don't have safe words, but there have been times when I have said I was scared about something happening, and he changed gears after assessing I was ok.

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Post #: 24

RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/12/2008 10:16:11 PM

Leatherist

Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
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"Never sleep" was a good one to get my attention.

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Post #: 25

RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/12/2008 10:20:21 PM

Vigilantejustice

Posts: 106
Joined: 11/15/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

"Never sleep" was a good one to get my attention.

How about "Someday you'll wake up, and you'll be on fire."

Not that I would *ever* say that to Daddy. <innocent face>

-Corinne
House Vigilante
(Who, me?)

_____________________________

“Love begets love. This torment is my joy.”
"Those who are willing to be vulnerable move among mysteries."
"[Your work] is carved out of agony as a statue is carved out of marble." -All by Theodore Roethke

(in reply to Leatherist)

Post #: 26

RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/12/2008 10:22:27 PM

Emperor1956

Posts: 2370
Joined: 11/7/2005
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OH OH OH GOD OH MY FUCKING CHRIST THAT HURTS!

I find that one causes me to slow up a wee bit.

E.

_____________________________

"When you wake up, Pooh," said Piglet, "what's the first thing you say?"
"What's for breakfast? What do you say, Piglet?"
"I say, I wonder what's going to happen exciting today?"
Pooh nodded thoughtfully.
"It's the same thing," he said.

(in reply to switchtosub)

Post #: 27

RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/12/2008 10:28:37 PM

summersprite

Posts: 101
Joined: 4/3/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BBWnNC72

my Dominant and i discussed safe words, we chose the stop light method also. Though i have never had to use them, He can tell when to tone it down or when i have had enough of a certain play. Mostly He stoppeds before i think i have had enough.

Yes, this is the same for me. We're at a very early stage in playing with each other though, and i have really appreciated that He's made the effort to 'read' me and has always asked how i'm doing so i've never had to use the safewords.

(in reply to BBWnNC72)

Post #: 28

RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/12/2008 10:29:48 PM

CalifChick

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

I dunno Emp, with the right tone of voice.... that could mean, "if you stop now I'm ripping off your left testical with my teeth". I'm just sayin'.

Cali

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AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to Emperor1956)

Post #: 29

RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/12/2008 10:40:32 PM

Emperor1956

Posts: 2370
Joined: 11/7/2005
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quote:

Cali: I dunno Emp, with the right tone of voice.... that could mean, "if you stop now I'm ripping off your left testical with my teeth". I'm just sayin'.

Note to self: Purchase new full leather hood BEFORE Cali visits Chicago.

I'm just sayin'....

E.

_____________________________

"When you wake up, Pooh," said Piglet, "what's the first thing you say?"
"What's for breakfast? What do you say, Piglet?"
"I say, I wonder what's going to happen exciting today?"
Pooh nodded thoughtfully.
"It's the same thing," he said.

(in reply to CalifChick)

Post #: 30

RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/12/2008 10:48:34 PM

CalifChick

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

He thinks he can get a hood on me. Bwah hah hah hah hah. Okay, back on topic... if you can say "yellow", why can't you say "slow"??

Cali
(I duzn't unnerstand special words for ordinary things... speshally cuz yellow means FLOOR IT)

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to Emperor1956)

Post #: 31

RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/13/2008 12:10:46 AM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

How about, "Can you tone it down just a bit, Sir (or Maam or whatever)?" Safewords are just band aids that perpetuate our lack of communication skills most of the time.

Master Fire

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(in reply to switchtosub)

Post #: 32

RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/13/2008 12:27:41 AM

hopelessfool

Posts: 988
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

When in a head space, saying more then mew and grunt and squeak is like asking a cat to speak fluent japanese. It might work great with some cats ( I.e the ones in anime) but its not going to work for everyone. Im okay with communicating when on an equal playing feild (Ie where I can run if I need to... Snark just happens some times) But by the time im able to form a single word let alone muliple, im already at a point that I cant handle and things just go down hill from there...

That being said If I ever bite, It means stop,,, Ive Im scratching at a particular spot repeatedly (usually arm instead of back or bottom) and or trying to form letters with said scratching... It means slow... and If Im just kind of out of it where the eye are rolled up it means stop... and I might just get frustrated enough to throw something at you...

_____________________________

" I have nothing left to give, I have found the perfect end, You remain to make it hurt, disappear in to the dirt, carry me to heavens arms.....Dear Agony Just let go of me, suffer slowly, is this the way its gotta be, Dear Agony...."

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Post #: 33

RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/13/2008 5:54:15 AM

switchtosub

Posts: 28
Joined: 5/11/2008
Status: offline

quote:

How about "Someday you'll wake up, and you'll be on fire."

Actually, that's a good one for getting his attention to *start* playtime... <wicked grin> Mind if I use it?

Lots of good suggestions, folks, thanks. Squeaky toys and a clicker co-opted from the canine family members shall be placed in the human's toybox.

_____________________________

"I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing astroturf and the designated hitter. And I believe in long, slow, deep, wet, soft kisses that last for three days." ~"Crash" Davis (Kevin Costner) Bull Durham

(in reply to Vigilantejustice)

Post #: 34

RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/13/2008 6:03:11 AM

BBWnNC72

Posts: 1155
Joined: 6/22/2007
From: NC since Jan of 2007, but born and raised in Cali
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam

How about, "Can you tone it down just a bit, Sir (or Maam or whatever)?" Safewords are just band aids that perpetuate our lack of communication skills most of the time.

Master Fire

my Dominant can put me in a place where i would have a hard time stringing more then two words tegether. It isn't a bad place, quite the opposite. i get to giggling uncontrolablly the more pleasurable pain i get. So, one word is easier to do.
Though one day He did make me say "i can't take anymore" during a caning, it took a while between swats and giggles to get all those words out. Damn my ass hurt for a good while. (Thank You Sir

)

< Message edited by BBWnNC72 -- 5/13/2008 6:06:57 AM >

_____________________________

huggs and purrs
Brian's kat
a.k.a. "greedy monkey"
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
i am who i am, i am not ashamed. spank me, beat me, bite me, pull my hair, dominate me, control me, but always respect me for who i am.

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Post #: 35

RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/13/2008 7:20:05 AM

orfunboi

Posts: 1223
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline

I have trouble with using a safe word and find it much easier to just say what I am feeling. I have said things like "hey, give me a minute" and she knew I didn't want to stop, I just need a minute to get it together. I could also say something like "gee, you hit like a girl" if I wanted her to go harder, but I'm not that stupid.

(in reply to switchtosub)

Post #: 36

RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/13/2008 7:32:05 AM

orfunboi

Posts: 1223
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BoiJen

I'ma smart ass and have been known to go "SDS! SDS!" which means "same damned spot!" MsK gets excited and happy in Her space with Her pattern and forgets that I'ma small boi who needs variation. Other than that I haven't ever called a safeword. Please remember if you're waiting until you're at panic you're the one who didn't signal first. Not to be harsh, but it's your fault at that point for not communicating appropriately.

Also when it comes to stuff like this, "he tried to kill me" doesn't fly for people who've actually been around. So please don't rely on that. Especially when that person isn't here to defend themselves. If you went through something traumatic for you and you're not yet in a place to be able to communicate in a scene then you're not ready to scene again. Period. It's simple as that. To say or act otherwise is mostly a diservice to the person who thinks you're ready to play and ends up getting let down repeatedly.

Yeah I'm the hard ass with the cold hard truth about what you're saying.

I can close my eyes and picture that, and it makes me smile every time, thanks for the image

(in reply to BoiJen)

Post #: 37

RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/13/2008 7:44:40 AM

BoiJen

Posts: 2608
Joined: 3/7/2007
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It works really well because She starts laughing and even though She may still be swinging whatever tool She's using at the time, Her aim for the same spot changes because She's laughing so hard. I love doing scenes with Her it's great...not mention the sex that comes after. She's gonna be out of town Wicked but I might drop by or something...didn't see you at FO but we were there! :)

(in reply to orfunboi)

Post #: 38

RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/13/2008 7:47:04 AM

MystiKitten

Posts: 1
Joined: 1/8/2005
Status: offline

Oddly enough, my safeword (although I've never used it) is seriously. It came about one day when my master was complaining that he sometimes had problems telling when I was seriously wanting him to stop and when I was just struggling to get him to go harder, lol. Dunno if I'll ever have to use it, but I can guarantee I'll never forget it.

(in reply to orfunboi)

Post #: 39

RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/13/2008 7:49:06 AM

orfunboi

Posts: 1223
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline

She's fun to play with and to watch. You're a lucky little boi. I haven't made a Wicked yet, but went to FO for a little while. Left kinda early so you probibly came after. I wish I had known, I would have waited around.

(in reply to BoiJen)

Post #: 40

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