Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Safe words for "tone it down"


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: Safe words for "tone it down" Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/13/2008 7:50:09 AM   
orfunboi


Posts: 1223
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MystiKitten

Oddly enough, my safeword (although I've never used it) is seriously.  It came about one day when my master was complaining that he sometimes had problems telling when I was seriously wanting him to stop and when I was just struggling to get him to go harder, lol.  Dunno if I'll ever have to use it, but I can guarantee I'll never forget it.




He probibly won't either, good idea

(in reply to MystiKitten)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/13/2008 9:58:40 AM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline
I don't have any paticular safe word for that.  I usually gasp out pleas ease up a little Master.  That always works.

Matt's littleone

(in reply to orfunboi)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/13/2008 10:08:15 AM   
BoiJen


Posts: 2608
Joined: 3/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: orfunboi

She's fun to play with and to watch. You're a lucky little boi. I haven't made a Wicked yet, but went to FO for a little while. Left kinda early so you probibly came after. I wish I had known, I would have waited around.



We'll plan on being at the next FO...though I don't know at what time.

I am a lucky boi. And it's cool because She and I will be doing LIFE's workshop wed next month. The topic is Negotiation:The Win/Win to SM scenes and D/s relationships. And this topic of communicating during scene will be a big thing we bring up.

I've found, mostly when addressing people on the net, there's a huge reluctance to communicate during a scene. There's a lot of expectation of events rather than coomunication through them. So...;) we'll talk about this too.

(in reply to orfunboi)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/13/2008 3:45:27 PM   
xbutterflyx


Posts: 51
Joined: 7/18/2006
Status: offline

"Mercy, Sir." for slow down

"frog" for STOP..

smile bunches  xbx

(in reply to switchtosub)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/13/2008 5:10:02 PM   
StormsSlave


Posts: 629
Joined: 2/6/2008
Status: offline
We use "easy."  It means don't stop, just ease up a bit, and it's a word I can think of when I'm not communicating so good.

_____________________________

Congratulate me...I'm a missus!!

--nobody's resident anything.

(in reply to switchtosub)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/13/2008 5:44:21 PM   
MadameXTC


Posts: 96
Joined: 9/30/2004
Status: offline
I use the stop light safe words just cause that is what is used at most play parties and dungeons we have been to. It is easy and simple. But when we are at home sometimes I just give him this look *if I am not blindfolded* and I threaten him with his life.. lol yeh I know.. "not very submissive" but if someone catches me the wrong way I get switchy.. he usually sees my switchyness as a means to calm down but I do get punished for it at the same time.. And for some reason he doesn't think "owe" is a safe word. I think we are just at the point where body language says so much more then words. It gets that way after you have played with someone for awhile

_____________________________

"Dominance is best viewed through a submissive's actions"

(in reply to switchtosub)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/14/2008 8:27:07 AM   
tandm


Posts: 16
Joined: 4/14/2008
Status: offline
To get things to slow down, I snap my finger (my mouth is usually in a gag and cant talk).  When I snap, Master slows down .  If I snap over and over, he knows he needs to stop asap.  Works wonders and easy to remember.

(in reply to MadameXTC)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/14/2008 9:19:22 AM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
safewords, just like speech restrictions or running around naked all day, aren't for everyone.  some folk's realities preclude the generalized theories behind the applications.
 
this slave would encourage you not to play, if you don't feel safe playing without a "safe"-word, or a "tone-down" word and at the same time "safe"-words or "could you tone it down, please" doesn't work for you.

(in reply to switchtosub)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/14/2008 9:26:42 AM   
pinkwind


Posts: 367
Joined: 1/9/2005
Status: offline
We have two, depending on the reason for the need to slow down.

As we use the traffic light system, Amber means slow down you're going to fast for me, that kind of thing.

Emess (MS), together with whichever body part is called afterwards, means adjust that part of me, as i have physical disabilities, various forms of arthritis and MS, that sometimes have a negative influence at just the wrong time!


(in reply to switchtosub)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/14/2008 9:42:45 AM   
tsatske


Posts: 2037
Joined: 3/9/2007
From: Louisville, KY
Status: offline
quote:

How about, "Can you tone it down just a bit, Sir (or Maam or whatever)?" Safewords are just band aids that perpetuate our lack of communication skills most of the time. Master Fire


For the people on CM who are anti-safeword, this seems to be a hard concept to understand. I myself don't have safewords, and don't much like them, but for different reasons.
At the last party we were at, a friend of ours was playing his incredibly beautiful little sub girl. (Did I mention she's fucking gorgeous? OMG. And she is so hot when she is in ropes, and subbed out, i look like a zombie when i a that subbed out, she looks like a bondage angel... sorry, lost my train of thought. great tits, too - sorry.)
She zoned out when he ran the rope across her body, before he even tied her, much less hit her.
At some point, with one foot tied against her ass, her elbows meeting behind her back, and her dangling off the floor by elaborate shabari that included a cunt rope, she began screaming in a high pitched wordless keen. He immediately stopped and tried to access her, asking, 'are you okay? what's wrong? what hurts?' she kept keening. He had his assistant lower her to the ground. She managed to get out the word, 'hurt'. He is not looking her over franticly, asking, 'what hurts?' He untied her and got her down and to the ground.
Later on, she was laughing about it, saying, 'I hate it when they ask you questions, as if you can form a sentence in English. Your mind is saying, 'Oh, FUCK, that HURTS! That body part right there - you are going to break it off! I bet you'd stop if i told you - now, what is it called? its one of my limbs, yes, that's the word - limb - wait, i said limb, and now he is headed outside looking for a tree, that must have been the wrong word!'
a lot of people on here have talked about their Doms getting to know their natural symbols, and, honestly, when you are approaching that zone, i think that is the only thing that works. never mind the 'remembering your safeword' issues, i can't remember my native language! You are just going to have to learn what my body symbols mean.
Oh, and, I am one of those that scream and yell and holler and shout all KINDS of things. including threats to your life and manhood. Doesn't mean i want you to stop - i LIKE going there. (to that, 'OMG, I would sell my soul to the devil if you would stop for five minutes!' place. This little sub LIKES her visits to Hell.) Actually, for that spot, i guess i do have a 'yellow' word - i often start saying 'push. push. please, please, push!' meaning, i am about to go off the deep end, past sub space, to one of those other, very good places - can you kick it up a bit, and send me there? or, order me to go, which works too, for me at least, hearing him say, 'Fly, Bitch!', well, it just works.

_____________________________

“If you never did you should. These things are fun and fun is good”
~Dr. Seuss quote

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/14/2008 1:25:11 PM   
MercTech


Posts: 3706
Joined: 7/4/2006
Status: offline
We had established the Red/Yellow/Green idea.

Then the sub starts screaming "Pink, Pink, Pink"  at the top of her lungs.

Dead stop, "What does that mean"

"It hurts too much but don't stop."

We still giggle when someone mentions "pink".

Stefan

(in reply to Asherdelampyr)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/14/2008 1:31:32 PM   
AMaster


Posts: 814
Joined: 8/4/2005
Status: offline
I always ues a safe word, but the sub has to understand that once it is used the play is over for that session.  It makes her think very hard before using it. 

(in reply to switchtosub)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/14/2008 8:14:01 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline
If green, yellow, red aren't clear enough what about using a scale of 1 - 10? With 1 being barely felt and 10 way too much, you want things at a 6 or 7. That way it's intense enough to keep your attention but still being good enough that you'll want to do it again.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to switchtosub)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/14/2008 10:37:33 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline
Yes, there are time when safewords are necessary. But, at these times "normal" communication has broken down for prefectly logical reasons to begin with, such as an altered state or being gagged. It's as these times that we MUST have some kind of communication, such as safewords or actions. My point was about when you can just as easily TALK to someone as to say, "Purple with yellow stipes."

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to hopelessfool)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/14/2008 10:40:01 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BBWnNC72


my Dominant can put me in a place where i would have a hard time stringing more then two words tegether.


Yes...it's at these times when safewords isn't a band aid because you can't communicate effectively. It's at these times when safewords or actions ARE effective communication. But, when you can just as easily say it in words as say some off-the-wall color or something that perpetuates the problem.

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to BBWnNC72)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/14/2008 10:41:31 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: xbutterflyx


"Mercy, Sir." for slow down

"frog" for STOP..

smile bunches  xbx



Well, so much for having Kermit in the scene. Damn. Plushies are all the rage.

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to xbutterflyx)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/14/2008 10:44:08 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline
Again, it's obvious that there are times when safewords or actions ARE the communication because "normal" communication isn't possible. But when normal communication IS possible, I feel we should actually practice at being GOOD at it.

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to tsatske)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/14/2008 11:46:06 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam

Well, so much for having Kermit in the scene.


This reminded me of the time I broke out into the song: "It's not easy being green" 

He looked at me like I had officially lost it.

_____________________________

Good is the enemy of great.

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/15/2008 7:52:56 AM   
chrome


Posts: 4
Joined: 9/2/2006
Status: offline
Ma'am and i use : Edge for,  i  a moment to regroup and Mercy for stop.

(in reply to switchtosub)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Safe words for "tone it down" - 5/15/2008 7:55:10 AM   
chrome


Posts: 4
Joined: 9/2/2006
Status: offline
That would be 'i need" sorry missed that. wow i may need more java to continue typing. Nothing looks right today.

(in reply to chrome)
Profile   Post #: 60
Page:   <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: Safe words for "tone it down" Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094