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RE: Ordered to change your mood? - 5/14/2008 11:54:20 AM

ownedgirlie

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quote:

ORIGINAL: gypsygrl

quote:

They even will become extra noisey while doing things out in the kitchen. Why is it, the kitchen is always the place pissy slaves seem to gravitate towards?

'cause the cubboard doors are there and need to be slammed. I would think that'd be obvious. :)

LOL that was excellent.

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RE: Ordered to change your mood? - 5/14/2008 10:51:38 PM

phoenixinchains

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RE: Ordered to change your mood? - 5/15/2008 5:55:40 AM

DesFIP

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I doubt it would work and he isn't much for pissing into the wind. Beyond that, he can help lighten or change a mood. He can start venting to me when I'm calm and by the time he's calmed down I'm tense. He can hold me when I'm upset and I will calm down and relax. But just saying "I know you're upset because your father'd been in the hospital for a week but I want you to be totally unconcerned and happy" isn't going to cut it. Nor would I respect him for saying that.

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RE: Ordered to change your mood? - 5/15/2008 6:06:12 AM

ownedgirlie

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP
But just saying "I know you're upset because your father'd been in the hospital for a week but I want you to be totally unconcerned and happy" isn't going to cut it. Nor would I respect him for saying that.

Eek - - I can't imagine that would cut it for anybody!

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RE: Ordered to change your mood? - 5/15/2008 6:51:26 PM

MagiksSlave

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Peronsally I am bi-poler and even on medication I sometimes have great trouble regulating and controling my moods. I feel that if I dont have control over something such as my moods then there is no way to give that control over to someone else, someone could try and order me to change my mood ( my therapist has tried) but a fat lot of good it would do. I know I also some times get obessessive thoughts that arent usually good, the doc says Im OCD and such and my medication does help somewhat at cutting them back and helping to control my tendencies but it isnt realistic for a Dom or anyone to order me to change or control something that is not in my control.

MS

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RE: Ordered to change your mood? - 5/15/2008 7:27:00 PM

kyraofMists

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I think first it is important to understand what exactly a mood is; Webster defines it as a conscious state of mind or a predominant emotion. There are other definitions, but this one seems to be the best fit. I imagine a person could then take conscious steps to change their state of mind.

I have been instructed to get over certain moods that I am in; usually it is a self-destructive mood that could be damaging to our relationship. In the beginning, I used to react very negatively to this instruction. It took awhile for me to break the link that rejecting the behaviors and self-destructive pattern was not the same as rejecting me or how I was feeling.

Once I realized he wasn't rejecting me, then it just became a matter of finding what steps I needed to take in order to change my mood. Several years ago, I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder and in learning how to get healthy and control my depression, I learned quite a few useful tools to manage my emotions and my moods.

These days, I do a pretty damn good job of maintaining a postive emotional state and I don't let things take me out of that state for very long. For the most part, I control my moods and my emotions; I rarely let them control me. I couldn't be his slave if I was incapable of doing this.

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RE: Ordered to change your mood? - 5/16/2008 10:15:47 PM

fluffyswitch

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quote:

ORIGINAL: khem

This is a theoretical question, not a situation that has come up.

How would you react if, given a relationship where you regularly accept and follow orders from your top, a command to change your mood?

I have often found myself thinking "moods" are off limits and just how things are. When I look at my own moods, however, I feel like it is very possible to take practical steps to improve or alter my mood. (there's no shortage of lists of things to do to improve your mood).

Would you resent such an order? Would you feel like it was your top's "job" to alter your mood? Would you feel conflicted and like you were unable to obey? Do you think it is a unreasonable request?

(I'll also add that: yes, it is normal to have negative emotions and the point of this post is not imply that someone should always seek to run from them)

yes this is a fast reply...

yes i've been told this and yes i resent it and it generally has the opposite effect. i do all that i can to submit but at the same time it is my personal opinion (your mileage will vary) that there are somethings that are mine and mine alone and one of them is my mood. unless i'm constantly abusive or there is truly no reason for me to be nasty then i'm probably in a bad mood for a reason and i would like to be respected enough to be allowed to feel whatever i'm feeling. my dom is not around me 24/7 and there is a lot of stuff that occurs in my life that He'll never really be able to grasp just because He isn't going through it with me 24/7, and i dislike being told that i can't be stressed/angry/sad/whatever. i like being told that i'm obsessing about something because i literally can't see it when i get like that but at the same time i dislike being told to alter my mood, especially when i'm working towards altering it in the first place (like if i'm seeing someone to help deal with stress). i like to be able to control that myself.

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RE: Ordered to change your mood? - 5/17/2008 12:04:50 AM

StormsSlave

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My Lord never tells me how to feel or think. He does tell me that he's going to improve my mood, then goes about proving it. So far, he's got a 100% achievement rate.

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RE: Ordered to change your mood? - 5/17/2008 2:40:10 AM

eyesopened

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It is entirely reasonable to expect my Master to order, tell, remind, me to change my mood, especially if that mood is disturbing to Him or self-destructive to me. my definition of a mood is simply a response to something and while i may not be able to change the thing i am responding to, i can change my response to it. Negative energy begets negative energy. i may need a nudge from time to time to remember this and shift my focus to positive energy.

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