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RE: Is the term Dominant gentleman an oxymoron? - 10/22/2005 1:25:31 AM   
janyMJ


Posts: 6
Joined: 10/17/2005
Status: offline 		Master is absolutely a real and true gentleman. That is the way He stands in the world, in general. But i am the one opening doors, i pull His chair out (and wait for Him to tell me i can sit as well), i take His coat, i carry packages and shopping bags. And i love it that way. i see it as my task to make His life as effordless as i can.

When we met for the very first time we agreed to meet in a trainstation. He arrived with His luggage and greeted me. Then when we were ready to leave, we looked at each other, then at His luggage, at each other again. When i took the luggage and carried it to a cab, our roles were set, right there and then. From that moment on the basis of our relationship was clear. That was a wonderful moment.

janyMJ

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Is the term Dominant gentleman an oxymoron? - 10/22/2005 6:32:50 AM   
subcheryl


Posts: 280
Joined: 11/2/2004
Status: offline 		I personally like a Dominate and a vanilla man to be gentlemanly, I have been recently surprised by the number of young men who open the door and step aside to allow me to go out first, it impresses me and meets something deep within me. I feel respected and honored by a man who shows such curtesy's to me. And when my dom does it for me, I feel cherished and protected, I often wish there where more like this, not that I can't open my own doors or pull out a chair for myself, but it is nice to have it done periodically for me.

(in reply to janyMJ)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Is the term Dominant gentleman an oxymoron? - 10/22/2005 6:53:35 AM   
FTopinMichigan


Posts: 571
Joined: 7/5/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: bronxboy

I have been faced with this dilemma for a while, as a dominant man I still hold the door, carry the packages (yes the toy bag also), and walk on the outside of the street.
I was raised to be a gentleman, I do not put that away because I am with a submissive partner. But it has raised some questions in certain circles. Does anyone have any thoughts on the subject?


I know quite a few submissive men that could do well by being trained by you, in general manners. I have met few men that offered to carry my toy bag (although I may be a bit protective over my gadgets ), but they have opened the door the first time we meet, and rarely thereafter....like you only have to do it once to be a gentleman.

I appreciate seeing a Dom care for his submissive, as well as act courteously toward all women...because he's a gentleman.

Bravo, bronxboy. I would think that "dominant" (as in your orientation) and "boy" (as use in your name) are an oxymoron though.

K

PS

(in reply to bronxboy)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Is the term Dominant gentleman an oxymoron? - 10/22/2005 6:55:35 AM   
FTopinMichigan


Posts: 571
Joined: 7/5/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FTopinMichigan
PS


Dang, I hit the wrong button.


quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

--the definition of a gentleman was simple:

A gentleman is a man who says what he means and means what he says.



OMG, this means that I'M a gentleman too! HA!

K

(in reply to FTopinMichigan)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Is the term Dominant gentleman an oxymoron? - 10/22/2005 6:57:54 AM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		Well, in those days you had to be male, but otherwise you're right.

(in reply to FTopinMichigan)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Is the term Dominant gentleman an oxymoron? - 10/22/2005 8:18:38 AM   
pinkpleasures


Posts: 1114
Status: offline
quote:

Being a gentleman has nothing to do with holding the door, carrying packages, or walking on the outside of street.

In the old days--when they still HAD gentlemen--the definition of a gentleman was simple:

A gentleman is a man who says what he means and means what he says.

No more, no less.

Lam


i still need this..a Man with Character and Honor..i do not want to hear They are all dead...but i will not settle for less, so the question is either He will show up or He won't.

pinkpleasures

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RE: Is the term Dominant gentleman an oxymoron? - 10/22/2005 9:32:40 AM   
perfection20005


Posts: 419
Joined: 4/20/2005
Status: offline 		I see nothing wrong with being a Dom and a gentleman. My Master is also a Gentleman and I love Him for it. I wouldn't have it any other way.

< Message edited by perfection20005 -- 10/22/2005 9:33:28 AM >

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perfection

"I took one look at Him, and I knew He was my Master."

(in reply to bronxboy)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Is the term Dominant gentleman an oxymoron? - 10/22/2005 6:49:10 PM   
OscarHargraves


Posts: 693
Joined: 8/9/2005
Status: offline 		Okay, here's my personal spin on things.

I was raised to be a gentleman. 30+ years in the military didn't do anything to erase that either. I open doors for ladies, carry heavy items and pull out chairs at dinner. I always have. I always will. Does that make me any less of a Dom? I don't think so and neither does my Sub. My dominance is still there. It's a part of what I am and I still feel like I control the situation. I respect my Sub and the gift she offers me. I would do this for her as we entered a fancy hotel or the door to a 'munch' (if we had one here in NM). I would (and do) also do this for total strangers at times and think nothing of it. I don't think the two a mutually exclusive.

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(in reply to bronxboy)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Is the term Dominant gentleman an oxymoron? - 10/22/2005 7:32:31 PM   
bronxboy


Posts: 20
Joined: 3/23/2005
Status: offline 		I used that name to kind of express the child within me. I am still a boy at heart, life interfered with my younger days and now I am getting a chance to live my life like I should have when I was a boy. I do not think that my name has to be MASTER ______ in order to be dominant.
As for everyone else who wrote about sticking to your word, I do not say it unless I mean it. My word is my guarantee, you can count on it like the sun rising in the east.
I was brought up in an Italian Family and Honor comes before all things.
Thank you all for your kind words..


Paul

(in reply to FTopinMichigan)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Is the term Dominant gentleman an oxymoron? - 10/22/2005 8:32:35 PM   
Evanesce


Posts: 2325
Joined: 9/14/2005
Status: offline
quote:

I have been faced with this dilemma for a while, as a dominant man I still hold the door, carry the packages (yes the toy bag also), and walk on the outside of the street.
I was raised to be a gentleman, I do not put that away because I am with a submissive partner. But it has raised some questions in certain circles. Does anyone have any thoughts on the subject?


Master holds the door, opens car doors for me, carries the heavy packages, walks on the outside of the street, holds my chair, orders my meals in restaurants, pampers me when it's obvious I need pampering, brings me roses for no reason and is, in general, the most thoughtful, gentlemanly man I've ever known. There is also no question that He rules His household.

I wouldn't be involved with someone who was not a gentleman.

_____________________________

Denise

Give a slave what he truly needs, and he will do what you want.

"There's never a hero in a battle of ego." - Big & Rich


(in reply to bronxboy)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Is the term Dominant gentleman an oxymoron? - 10/22/2005 11:30:30 PM   
frenchpet


Posts: 587
Joined: 8/19/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Evanesce
Master [...] walks on the outside of the street

Stupid question : why on the outside ? I know that two centuries ago, before the invention of the prefect Poubelle, people used to throw their garbage by the window down to the middle of the street, which in addition was often muddy, so the rich would walk on the upper (outside) of the streets, and someone protective would also let a woman walk on the upper side (outside) of the street. Today the risk of being stolen is much higher on the inside, as many teenagers grab purses, phones etc from their motorcycle... so I don't understand why a "gentleman" would walk on the outside. Plus if the street is perfectly safe, the outside is where one does window shopping... I'm confused.

(in reply to Evanesce)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Is the term Dominant gentleman an oxymoron? - 10/22/2005 11:51:59 PM   
Wolfie648


Posts: 600
Joined: 9/14/2005
Status: offline
quote:

Stupid question : why on the outside ?


well Neo - does your spoon bend? :-) just messing with you.

Not a stupid question - the man walks on the outside because (back when we only had first and second floors) when you empty your pot (during the dark ages that have been referred to in other posts - the thing you do your biological business is either (number 1 and/or 2) dump it out the window). Being that you are far more likely to be hit with said pots contents on the outside rather than inside of walking down the street the 'gentleman' would step up and take the outside position.

Maybe I'm wrong but it seems the most reasonable theory I've read to date.

D (owner of j)

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Possibly.

(in reply to frenchpet)
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RE: Is the term Dominant gentleman an oxymoron? - 10/23/2005 12:11:14 AM   
ExistentialSteel


Posts: 676
Joined: 1/18/2005
Status: offline 		I was going to comment on that part about walking on the outside of the street, too, but FrenchPet beat me to it. BronxBoy is from NYC and I wonder how in the world people manage to do that in the mass of humanity there? I'm really going to humiliate my slave and make her walk on the outside tomorrow. <grin>

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For those who are like Roman Candles leaving bright trails in the night sky while the crowd watches until the dark blue center light bursts into magnificent colors and the crowd goes, ahhhhhhhhhh.

(in reply to Wolfie648)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Is the term Dominant gentleman an oxymoron? - 10/23/2005 6:07:48 AM   
swtnsparkling


Posts: 1738
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Wow and here i thought walking on the outside was incase a car/truck went out of control and cameup on the sidewalk the one closet to the edge got it 1st. i know when i took my daughter for a walk when she was little i took the outside. just being cautious lol

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Walk in Peace
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(in reply to Wolfie648)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Is the term Dominant gentleman an oxymoron? - 10/23/2005 8:19:06 AM   
pinkpleasures


Posts: 1114
Status: offline 		i don't have any explanation i can offer apart from what's been said...but every gentleman i've known has walked on the outside...and it's kinda nice...like holding hands...pinkpleasures

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Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Is the term Dominant gentleman an oxymoron? - 10/23/2005 9:08:45 AM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		I thought the reason was that if a wagon in the street hit a puddle or something, the gentleman would get splashed, not the lady.

(in reply to swtnsparkling)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Is the term Dominant gentleman an oxymoron? - 10/23/2005 10:20:33 AM   
frenchpet


Posts: 587
Joined: 8/19/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Wolfie648

quote:

Stupid question : why on the outside ?


well Neo - does your spoon bend?


There is no spoon, Wolfie.

In fact I simply got confused, I thought the outside was, well, the opposite. Anyway, it wasn't only in the dark age. It probably started with the earliest cities, and concerning other garbages (maybe not 1 and/or 2) it ended, in Paris, only when the Prefect, Poubelle, invented the poubelle (garbage can), with the law of March 7th 1884 : not the dark ages any more, just 5 years before the third universal exposition in Paris in fact.

edited : but the origin is what I explained first (of course the reason has to be different now, as there isn't so much mud in the middle of the street any more), hence the expression "tenir le haut du pavé" (= to head the field).

< Message edited by frenchpet -- 10/23/2005 10:22:37 AM >

(in reply to Wolfie648)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Is the term Dominant gentleman an oxymoron? - 10/23/2005 10:40:50 AM   
bronxboy


Posts: 20
Joined: 3/23/2005
Status: offline 		That is the answer I would give, It is about protecting the one I love from danger. I walk closest to the traffic.....

(in reply to swtnsparkling)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Is the term Dominant gentleman an oxymoron? - 10/23/2005 11:02:28 AM   
Evanesce


Posts: 2325
Joined: 9/14/2005
Status: offline
quote:

Stupid question : why on the outside ?


Protection. From a great many potential hazards. In earlier times it was to prevent the woman from being splashed by unsavory wastes and such. In today's times, it's assumed the inside position is safer from things such as road splashing, out of control vehicles, drive-by shootings and other random acts that are potentially hazardous as the result of walking down the street.

_____________________________

Denise

Give a slave what he truly needs, and he will do what you want.

"There's never a hero in a battle of ego." - Big & Rich


(in reply to frenchpet)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Is the term Dominant gentleman an oxymoron? - 10/23/2005 12:43:47 PM   
Tristan


Posts: 330
Joined: 5/31/2004
Status: offline 		Common courtesy is most often a sign of inner strength. It’s an indication that a person is able to handle a situation or person without resorting to physical threats, violence, or intimidation. It’s also a sign on some level that you believe all people are your equal, which in no way takes away from your dominance or submission. Rather, I believe, it enhances it. Your dominance over another or submission to another is out of respect for your partner. The dominant / submissive relationship becomes one of equals. Common courtesy eliminates the “I’m better than you because…”, the natural order, and/or female supremacy stuff. In other words, can you really feel dominant if you believe that your partner is inferior to you?

(in reply to Evanesce)
Profile   Post #: 40
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